Calling all Plus Size brides...

[nytemist]

You know, as women we are alwasy our own worst critic. We''ve all had the fashion crisis mornings where we don''t think anything looks good, but we know inside that we are all great looking people. I know for me if I''m having a bad body day, it real hard for me to just smile and accept a compliment; I''m tempted to point out the parts that are wrong. Must stop! ALl my life I was an athlete- ballet, then hockey and swimming from age 5 until college. I was never thin, my build and frame didn''t allow it. At my most fit, at 8% body fat, I was still 145lbs. I''m now about 220 so I have some to lose, just to be healthy. My doctor said to ignore the basic H/W chart since I''m clearly not obese (but on paper I am) 160-170 would be about perfect for me, even at 5''3". I don''t care about ''society ideals'', just preventing any issues (hypertension and diabetes runs in both families fortunately I don''t have either)

Cassian, that dress is perfect for you. I think it''s beautiful. I know that may seem hard to hear, but it''s true. Proudly strut down the aisle in it!

And beware of moms... they can give you a single look that can ruin you whole day. A couple of months ago, my mother got all excited thinking I was pregnant. When I said no, she says ''oh I though maybe your might be, you''re looking larger''. (we don''t get along) I just say ''yeah, sure Ma.''

Thank you very much Nicki and Haven! I went with my gut and wore my favorite color. I knew in my heart that I didn''t want a white dress, though I tried some on that I loooooved the style, pattern or beading, but couldn''t dye the material. My only concern with my dress was the girls falling out a bit! The sweetheart was a bit lower than I wanted it.

Also, if anyone is thinking of the wrap idea, you could even do something real simple like going to JoAnne fabric and having them cut a sheer piece of material for you and maybe add some trim.

 

[Sabine]

Date: 8/27/2007 8:36:42 PM
Author: Cassian
Wow guys, you all have helped lift my spirits.

it is really hard for me sometimes. i used to be a thin 120lbs, and then i had to take medication for 8 years, and it packed on 100 pounds, just from the meds. i still haven't completely ever become ok with that, and my self esteem took a HUGE hit because of that, and i have never regained the esteem i once had, no matter what people tell me. plus, my mom is always on me about how i look. not mean spirited, her comments come from a place of love and concern, but she is always commenting on my weight, saying if i did this i would lose more, etc., just little things that really really get to me. i already feel bad about it, she definitely doesn't help.
most of the time i feel gorgeous. my fiance thinks i am beautiful, he tells me all the time, and all my friends do too, but my mom was just in town for my bridal shower, so she left me super sensitive about the whole thing.

zoe, i would love to start a new thread for motivation. my wedding is Oct. 13th, about 6 1/2 weeks away. i lift weights regularly, but don't do as much cardio as i should.
i love my dress, its strapless, which is out of my comfort zone, but that's why i love it. cause i feel sexy in it.

nytemist, you look beautiful in that picture. i guess i am just so judgemental about my own self, i just need to build up more confidence in myself no matter how i look. i have actually gained a couple pounds since i bought my dress, but i still have some time to lose them again. here is a pic of me the day my dress came in. it fit really well there. its all wrinkly but you get the idea. i just meed to lose those couple pounds to get back there.
anyway, thanks for all the support out there. its nice to know there are others our there going through the same thing.

I'm right there with you! I also used to be quite thin, and although I always worried about gaining a vanity pound or 5, my weight NEVER varied more than that. Then this past year I found out I had thyroid problems, and I gained about 35 lbs in just about 3 months. I know that 35 lbs is still not much, but it is definitely enough to make me not feel like myself anymore. I was crushed the first time I went to try on wedding dresses because I just couldn't get over how different I looked in the mirror compared to how I was used to looking in my head.

I immediately started a workout regime that included cardio every day, plus really started watching what I ate. And after 2 months of this....the final result is that I haven't lost any weight

. I've really had to reconcile myself to the fact that this weight is not something that is just going to go away, and that person I see in the mirror now really is me. It was difficult to accept this, but I've made progress. Recently I finally threw out some clothes that are now too tight to wear that last month I was still forcing myself into even though they looked hideous. I've also finally been able to start shopping for new clothes in a bigger size instead of first trying on my old size and just hoping I would still fit in them, followed by being crushed when I didn't.

Finally trying on wedding dresses again was the hardest step I had to take. I know there are all kinds of tricks to make larger girls feel comfortable in wedding dresses, such as styles and shapes that are flattering, straps and shawls to hide arms/shoulders/backs, etc., but I just didn't want to compromise my dream dress vision because of how I looked. But after trying on tons of dresses, I did find my dream dress as a combination of what I wanted and what I felt looked flattering on me.

You look GORGEOUS in your dress! I'm sure you know that, but you can never hear it too much. And I truly agree that that what will really make all the difference will be how you FEEL in your dress. Once you know it makes you look stunning, that inner beauty won't be able to keep from shining through. (cliche, i know, but no less true

. Okay, sorry for the long reply, but this thread just really struck a cord in me. This is the first time I've really talked about how I've felt. It's hard having a FI who literally can't gain weight for the life of him...I'm not kidding...he weighs about 110 lbs, and a MOH who is tiny and gorgeous. But you guys really make me feel like I can stop comparing myself to other brides because on my day all that matters is how happy FI and I are to share our love, and that always looks good!