Diamond update

[sk8rjen]

Well, guys, I''ve decided to send the pear back -- probably. All of you who looked at my pics and gave me opinions, I so SO appreciate it. But I''m having second and third and fourth thoughts about it and I''ve given myself time to think it over...

The numbers on the pear are really good -- like firegoddess said, class 1a. But fancy shapes need to be seen. In the house, I was ecstatic. It''s proportions are exactly what I wanted, the color waqs great, and it had more sparkle than any diamond I''ve ever seen close-up. I thought, "ok, I was one of the lucky ones and got a good EGL diamond." But there''s no denying the amount of bow-tie it has, to the point where I think it''s WAY more than I can handle, especially outside (even though I spend my life in a dull ice rink).

So I''ve put in a call to Mark T at engagementringsdierct after reading all of the wonderful things about him, and the new search is on....we have 2 potentials right now -- one he''s bringing in to look at (he''ll have it friday) and the other he''s supposed to be looking at today. Both are smaller carat-weight than the one I got (one''s 1.05 and the other is 1.01, but the dimensions are similar). Supposedly one of them has a "very small bowtie." If I see one and I can''t get past a very small bowtie, I will have to change direction altogether. But it sounds like he''s the man to find me something in my BF''s price range that he can attest to being great, so cross your fingers.

I feel like such a diamond snob, though. I mean, last year if i''d gotten this same exact diamond I have here I might have fainted. Now I''m questioning it being good enough. (sigh)

Anyone else feel like that after you''ve started learning? Last year, I would have been happy with a 3-stone rings we saw at Kohl''s for goodness sake, and noww I''m sending back a 1.22 ct beautifully cut diamond. I feel bad about it, and the boy feels let-down that it''s not "the one," but another one will be on the way soon.

Is this maybe a sign I need to go to back to an oval? Or go forward with the pear (bf likes it better) -- and I ADORE it in a halo, and both pears and ovals have bowties, and UGH I think I am having some kind of weird diamond overload and am losing my sanity!

help!
jen

 

[snuga]

First of all, take a deep breath!!!

If you do not LOVE this diamond, then send it back. It sounds like you aren''t completely satisfied with it now, so I''m not sure you will be 10 years from now. I''m sure you will find something that you love!

 

[meepcat]

Ya know, look at it this way:

Did you marry your very first boyfriend? No. So who says you have to get married with the first diamond you really liked?

 

[froufrou]

haha meepcat, your comment is funny. lets see , you could grade your boyfriends for clarity, cut, and etc too...

 

[FireGoddess]

Definitely see how the stone from Mark T looks, but if you can''t get over a bowtie, you can''t get over a bowtie....which is going to eliminate marquise and ovals as well, at the very least. Sometimes I think gee, it would be nice to have a big ole ideal cut round but I do love the pear, and it came at a discount compared to a comparable sized round which I was very happy about. Just have to go with what sings to you!

 

[Mandarine]

Hi Jen!...

Don''t feel bad about returning it!!....if you don''t feel right about it then you just don''t...is that what they call mind clean vs eye clean? (see? I''m learning!)

Keep us posted!!!!!

M~

 

[ephemery1]

Jen, it sounds like you''re making the right decision... I think sometimes it feels better just to know you''ve considered several different options, rather than just going with the first one you chose. Especially if something in that first one made you question it... you might always wonder if you would have found something better. Just my 2cents!

 

[Lorelei]

That is the thing with eductation Jen - it is a natural progression and causes you to question everything you wouldn''t have before your new knowledge, which is the point of it! If this diamond doesn''t make your heart sing, then it isn''t the one - you will know when you find it! With many people, the old mind clean does strike and I can find you countless stories and examples of an inclusion in a diamond bugging them, the colour, cut, depth, bowtie, table size, etc etc etc - often if it bothers you now it will continue to do so, not in all cases, but in many. Do what you feel is right. This is your diamond and you need to love it. Think carefully before you return it, but if you do have doubts, don''t pull the trigger and buy it.

 

[meepcat]

GOG had a 2+ct. diamond for a little more than the price I found with an independent vendor in SF who''s been around for 30+ years. It was an M, but GOG is very reputable. However, rather than going for this one, I chose the J/SI2 that''s only 2 carats in size, but it was beautiful in person. Sure, I could get something larger if I wait even longer, or I could get something smaller and wait no more -- but I''d rather not be so greedy, and just stick with the stone that I really love.

Naturally, my search is over, and I''m now just waiting for it.

So when you FEEL your search is over, then make it so.

 

[akw94]

Jen,
I think your decision to send it back makes sense. You are the one who has to love it. If you''re not, that''s ok, there are others. Don''t give up your search yet. See what''s out there. It looks like there are other potentials. I agree about the knowledge thing. I had no idea there was so much to know before and now, I want to use all that knowledge. It''s exciting but I know it will make me more picky. And just think, you will get so much more for the $ now, b/c of what you know. Luckily (or not) for me, I won''t be making the final decision so hopefully *my* knowledge will rub off when we go looking.

Good luck on your search! Very exciting!

 

[diamondlil]

Hi Jen. Sorry I missed your other pear thread. I was not as attentive to PS over the weekend as I normally am.

Like Virginia said, I have a pear that I almost traded in for a round. Our stories are very different, but after coming to PS and learning so much about cut, I was convinced that my EGL USA pear was not good enough. In addition to that, I could not seem to find the right setting for it (halos were not quite out there yet), and I had a *jeweler-from-hell* experience that made me want to sell the pear and start all over again. Thank heaven I ended up keeping it and found a fantastic jeweler who made it into a spectacular ring. Even a year later, I still look at my hand and think it looks like a ring some movie star should be wearing, not lil ol me!!!!

As far as pears go, they are so difficult to judge by the numbers. Now that you have had the stone in your possesion and have played with it for several days, if it is not singing to you, than it''s not the one. If you have doubts now, they will haunt you forever. The numbers say 1A cut, but unfortunately, choosing a pear is not as simple as that.

Is there any way you could hold this pear and compare it to another?

 

[cinnabar]

Pears are funny things, you really can''t tell by the numbers whether it''s a stone that *you* will love.

Mine is a tad shallow at 58%, and it has a thick girdle, both of which put it down a couple of grades in cut quality. I wanted the thick girdle though, because of the delicate point on pears, and I wasn''t bothered about it appearing small for carat weight. Besides, the shallowness makes up for that to some extent

Despite being technically only a "good" cut though, my pear has absolutely no bowtie that I can see. My husband can''t see one either. I''m freakishly obsessed about bowties and I thought it might be impossible to be happy with a pear, but I couldn''t be happier with the one I have.

If you don''t love this or any future pear, don''t give up on the shape if you love it. I suspect that every premium cut pear probably has a bit of a bowtie; it''s not considered a big no-no by connoisseurs but I know I hate bowties so I''d rather get a pear that''s less than premium.

I know it''s heresy on PS to say "I don''t want an ideal cut", but those parameters really only apply to round diamonds.

I also wish that vendors would keep more pears in stock, rather than dropshipping or calling them in to order, but I understand that it''s not as popular a shape as round and keeping unsold stock isn''t good business sense.

I hope you do find a pear that you love. It''s always nice to get new members of the pear lovin'' brigade.

 

[sk8rjen]

Thank you all so much for your responses! I really did give myself time to think, and fortunately, I do not have to return it RIGHT NOW, so it gives me time to bring in another one or two before I absolutely decide to return it. I guess I just lost it a little --I''m feeling slightly overwhelmed with everything I''ve learned and want to use the knowledge wisely!

Honestly, I love a pear, I love that it''s different and I just ADORE it in a halo! I think with Mark T. on board, the right one for me is just around the corner, and for that I am still very excited. I''m sure I can find one with what I condsider an acceptable bowtie, plus for me, I''m great with an I si1, so there''s plenty to choose from.

Please just keep your fingers crossed for me that the right one (or the one that shows me I HAVE the right one already!) shows up soon, b/c now that the ball is rolling, I''m more and more excited about it all

I''m so lucky there''s so many pear-lovers here, too! I know you will help guide me on this search

thanks!
jen

 

[jesterjigger]

I don''t know anything about pears, but if you don''t love, love, love, love it you shouldn''t feel bad about sending it back. Afterall, you''re going to have to look at it for the rest of your life, so you should have something that makes you smile with joy at the sight of it! If you can hold on to the one you currently have and check out other ones that should really work to your advantage...being able to compare them side by side. Whatever you decide, don''t feel bad, afterall, it''s a lot better to start out having made an educated decision, instead of stumbling upon ps years later and suddenly noticing these things in your diamond. Good luck with the continued hunt!

 

[sk8rjen]

So, quick update -- I talked to Mark T. yesterday and he said the one he brought in is BEAUTIFUL and feels I''ll be very happy with it based on what I''ve told him. yay!!

I still have the other one, so hopefully Mark can ship this one Monday so i''ll have time to compare them. He also is willing to custom-make the halo on an eternity band I purchased through Mavilo, so hopefully his price quote for that will fit my bf''s budget. At this point, i''ll chip in if i have to just to get it done already!

Also, my BF DID talk to his mom about our upcoming engagment (finally!!) He was so cute about it (I heard the whole conversation )

!

His cousin put his ring for his girl on layaway, so their engagement isn''t happening this weekend, so by the time there is one, we should be too, and we really CAN celebrate together

It''s funny, but I too THRIVE on you ladies getting engaged, but the family/friends type definitely gives me a taste of the little green-eyed-monster

I hope to have more pics to post on tuesday

jen

 

[diamondfan]

sk8r...I loved your comment about "last year...but now..." I think that is just the point!!! You are an educated consumer. you should never apologize for being deliberate or discriminating about something so costly and precious to you. Know your facts, being armed with knowledge is so important!!!! I am sure you will make the right choice. PS I have three boys too! (from your photo it looks like it!!!)

 

[kcoursolle]

I can relate to this quite a bit because searching for a radiant was a similar experience. Radiants are really hard in my opinion. However, when I found "the one" I knew it was the one right away. I think you will know when you''ve found the one that you want when you find it! I had seen other radiants with slightly better numbers, but this one just sparkled a hell of a lot more anyways...go figure, and I loved the proportions more than any other i''d seen. My radiant also has a tiny tiny bowtie, I didn''t even see it for a couple of days. However, this doesn''t bother me, but some of the other radiants I saw with bigger bowties bothered me quite a bit. I think that if you are noticing it already and it bothers you, it could be a problem in the future. How exciting you have another pear on the way to look at!!! It would be great to compare them side by side. I think that will really help you decide. Can''t wait to hear about the new pear, good luck!

 

[sk8rjen]

DiamondFan -- yes, 3 boys!

How old are yours? Mine are 8, 5 and 3. It''s always a circus at my house! you are right -- I''m glad to be more educated and I love learning everything I''m learning. I know I''m going to be happy when it all comes together!

KCourselle-- wow, learned something new -- I didn''t know radiants have bowties, too. I love that yours was the one and the numbers were not quite as perfect. Just proof that every diamond has a home, right? I am definitely looking forward to comparing side by side -- I think I''ll learn more doing that than anything I''ve learned so far. I can''t wait ''til Tuesday

jen

 

[ilovesparkles]

Yay about the diamond but oh my even more precious are those boys! Too TOO adorable!

 

[diamondfan]

Sk8rjen...I take it your kids are into skating?! I have three boys, one who is 13 1/2 (puberty can be an ugly time, and boys are not necessarily easier than girls I am sorry to say!) one who is 10 (11 in July) and one who is 4 1/2 going on 15. Plus because I am not busy enough with track meets, religious school, music lessons, karate, playdates and the various doctor visits thrown in, I got a puppy too! (she is my girl in the house!!) About your ring, second order of business...go with your gut. As I said, you should reap the benefits of your knowledge. If something upsets you in any way, DO NOT TALK YOURSELF into it. Have patience, and I am sure the right one that speaks to you will come along!!!!

 

[sk8rjen]

Diamondfan -- hee hee -- puppies can be SO much work, but they always appreciate you!

Boys on the otherhand... I actually have real mama''s-boys and I hope that sticks, of course none of mine are teenagers yet. My name on here is because I am a figure-skating coach, not b/c of them, although my 2 older ones are now learning to skate and liking it. I''d rather tham play football or soccer though! Since I work with girls, I feel like I have the best of both worlds

jen

 

[diamondfan]

Date: 4/23/2006 4:24:42 PM
Author: sk8rjen
Diamondfan -- hee hee -- puppies can be SO much work, but they always appreciate you!

Boys on the otherhand... I actually have real mama''s-boys and I hope that sticks, of course none of mine are teenagers yet. My name on here is because I am a figure-skating coach, not b/c of them, although my 2 older ones are now learning to skate and liking it. I''d rather tham play football or soccer though! Since I work with girls, I feel like I have the best of both worlds

jen

My pup Maya is always happy to see me! Never asks for more allowance, never wants the newest IPOD or tells me all the other puppies get to watch R (R!?) rated movies...haha. I love my sons, and they are very affectionate and tell me everything for the most part. Daniel, my oldest, is betwixt and between now as an adolescent...he wants to cuddle and tell me stuff, even kisses me goodbye in front of his pals, but is grappling with independence and being less kid like. Sniff sniff...he is also sooo big now, I look at him and cannot recall the little peanut who thought I was a total goddess...(now I am a partial goddess but can still make him cringe!)...so sad, they grow up soooo fast, Sounds like you have it worked out so well. We have an ice skating club where I live. Drat my wobbly ankles and lack of grace on ice...I dreamt of being a skater...(or did I just love the outfits!!!!???)

 

[sk8rjen]

Drat my wobbly ankles and lack of grace on ice...I dreamt of being a skater...(or did I just love the outfits!!!!???)[/quote]


ahhhhh- the outfits ---full of bling!

jen
ps I always knew I''d be the mother of boys and I LOVE it. I just hope, like you, not to be the monster-in-law someday like some of those on the other thread. Still, I will be very sad if a girl comes into any of my boys'' lives and does not want to be close to my side of the family. Thank goodness that''s a ways off! What are your other 2 boys'' names? mine are Gabriel Raine, Adrian Zane and Donovan Skye.

jen

 

[diamondfan]

Jen: What great names! I love them. I had girl names chosen, did not need them, but at least I got to name the dog! I have Daniel Harrison, Adam Maxwell and Jordan Alexander. I have to tell people no, Harrison is not for Harrison Ford and Jordan not for Michael Jordan, not anything against them but...and that Jordan Alexander is NOT the guy from Seinfeld!!!! (it is Jason!)

M: I agree, Irina is impressive with her skills. Jury still out about changing the avatar though...

 

[kcoursolle]

I hope I''m not hijacking, but here is a picture of a radiant bowtie just for fun I found doing a search for those who haven''t seen one before. I think this bowtie is pretty bad. How big was the bowtie on the pear? By the way, everyone has said this, but your kids are very adorable. Have you gotten the second pear yet??!!

 

[fatafelice]

YAY! I can''t wait to see pics of this new pear!!! It seems like there definitely was something better waiting just around the corner!

 

[sk8rjen]

Thanks for the picture of the radiant, KCourselle! I totally did not realize that before. I''d agreee that that''s a pretty bad bowtie. But it''s not so much in the middle, just the sides.

The first pear I brought in really looked so beautiful, but there was just no denying the big bowtie (funny it didn''t really show up in the pics, but trust me it was there. The other one will be here tomorrow afternoon, and it sounds better, we''ll see...

Have a good night, ladies!
jen

 

[sk8rjen]

It''s still not here yet... it''s still not here yet...it''s still not here yet....
ARGH!

ok, had to get that out!
jen

 

[Blenheim]

Jen,

What is that in your avatar? You''re not hiding anything from us, are you?

Your boys are adorable, by the way, and I love their names. I wish that I could have redheaded kids, but unfortunately there are no redheads in my boyfriend''s family.

 

[sk8rjen]

Wellllllllllllllllll... it''s here and I''m a LOT worse off than I was before (if deciding between a couple of diamonds makes me "worse off"!!!!)

So I took a million pics and they turned out well, but before I give details, I think I''ll post them and see which you all like better. I personally am going absolutely INSANE!! I WANT THEM BOTH!

Seriously, I just realized that the bowtie on the one I already have is not out of the norm, unless you consider both bad. Mark T. Thinks this one is a "small" bowtie and it is equal to the one I already had. So I''ll get over it

Now it''s about this --- which one is better???? Yes there''s a size difference and that''s all I''m going to say for now. I can''t wait to hear what you think! How many is too many pics, btw??

jen