Did your life turn out how you expected?

[Amber St. Clare]

Did my life turn out as expected?


No, and thank God it didn't. Like Kenny I had a dismal, frightening childhood--my father had PTSD from being a POW and he was an alcoholic, and I honestly think he was disappointed my sisters and I weren't boys. It is absolutely NO EXAGGRATION to say that when I was a child "happiness" for me was when my father wasn't drunk and ranting and my mother wasn't playing one sister against the other. The only time they behaved themselves was when my grandparents dropped in for a visit.

School wasn't difficult, but we were the "bussed in kids" and never felt we belonged. It was also very difficult having friends over because you were never sure when the volcano would erupt.

Honestly there was no joy or anticipation in my life early on. I left home, married early and disastrously and developed a liking for pharmaceuticals {which I at last addressed}.

My life became happy once I met the husband. He treats me like a queen, is a great father and just an all around good guy. I don't think anyone will be surprised when I say my parents were not happy in the least to see me happy, continued to be negative and destructive influence which led to me remove them from my life. I know my parents and one sister are dead, and maybe you will think I am horrible when I say I honestly don't care. We have a happy life, something which I NEVER thought I deserved.

 

[Karl_K]

nope never thought it would be this bad but there is tomorrow and it may be better.

 

[Jambalaya]

December-fire and Sky56, thank you for your comments on the previous page xxx

 

[december-fire]

Jambalaya, you're welcome. ((Hugs))

I hope you, Sky56, and all the other wonderfully creative people in the world (including many others here on PS) continue to bless us with beautiful art, music, literature, film, architecture, photography, etc. And, of course, the incredible diamonds and jewellery which drew us to PS in the first place! Our lives would lack dimension without your gifts. Thank you!

nope never thought it would be this bad but there is tomorrow and it may be better.

Karl K, I don't know the details, but I hope your world becomes brighter in the near future.

As for my own answer to the OP's question:

No. My life did not turn out as I expected.

The really rough parts were rougher than I expected.
The really wonderful parts were more wonderful than I expected.

Some of the painful stuff taught me things that I might not have otherwise learned or truly understood.
But, some of the painful stuff is just, well, painful.
Falling into that last category is the helpless feeling of seeing a person shattered by the loss of a loved one.

Overall, I've been incredibly blessed. I have wonderful people in my life, including my amazing children.
Starting with nothing but an overdose of determination, I fulfilled my childhood goals of getting a university degree, having an interesting career, achieving financial independence, and travelling.

I expect a mixture of great and awful in the years to come. I also expect the unexpected! I never could have predicted the way my life has gone so far.

To anyone currently enduring difficult times, I wish you strength and hope. Some of the most joyful things in my life arrived out of the blue after very painful events. Don't despair.

 

[Sky56]

Thank you! Encouragement is always appreciated by creative people.
My life has turned out very differently than how I expected. There were times of upheaval, illness, pain, loss, etc and I am grateful for how life is today, and has been in recent years. Hard times make you deeply appreciate when things are good - Health, personal happiness, creativity. Attitude is everything - feeling grateful for the good things you have and not mourning for the things you don't.

 

[aljdewey]

Did it turn out how I expected? Not precisely. Some of the adult milestones that my childhood vision anticipated did materialize (finding my husband) and some didn't (children).

I made some choices I never even considered as kid, while I didn't make others I fully expected I would.

In my early adulthood, these variances sometimes made me feel a bit unsettled - it was like I wasn't meeting benchmarks I expected to. As I aged a bit more, I realized that part of growth is embracing opportunities that life offers even as they take you away from one vision and lead you toward an alternate one. I realized that my childhood vision was an imagination and not an expectation.

I've become more focused on the now: am I happy with my life? Do I continue to learn? Do I continue to strive for new things? This has become the more important measurement for me, and I have to say that I'm incredibly happy overall.

Most of all, I think I'm more aware of my good fortune than ever before. There are tons of really deserving people who don't have the same access to opportunity that I've had, and I"m grateful for life's offerings every day.

 

[NTave]

When I was 16 I thought I was supposed to marry my high school sweetheart..that never happened..thankfully. I'm single, with a boyfriend, divorced..those things I struggle with, Bc ive always wanted one love for the thick and thin, the married forever relationship. it's just I chose wrong. Anyway, beautiful children, a successful career and a masters degree that wasn't in the plan. Home. I'm the most proud of my babies. I've traveled and due to a medical scare this year I looked at and created a bucket list and realized that I've exoerienced so incredibly much that I would be able to go from this earth knowing that I've made a difference, ive experienced so much of what this life has to offer, and that Ive been very blessed in family, and in life. And I've seen enough to be very thankful for the opportunities that I've had.