Disrespectful?

[devientdrow]

Date: 8/23/2006 9:58:32 PM
Author:gem-ini

Date: 8/21/2006 6:30:23 PM
Author: Mara
This thread is getting insane!

''getting''?

it must be gettng time for some lemon pie

(*•.¸(`*•.¸¸.•*´)¸.•*)
¨`•.¸ *belle*¸.• ´¨
(¸.•*(¸.•*´ `*•.¸)*•.¸)









Just a thought...
Isn''t it a little disrespectful to decide that a thread has gone on too long or is too detailed or whatever just because an individual (or several) doesn''t like the way it''s going?? The thread started by fire&ice certainly seemed to speak to a reasonable issue for a diamond consumer internet forum -- and many people responded... What''s with the snide little pie and ice-cream hi-jack? If the thread had in fact stopped there, wouldn''t have gotten to read John Pollards interesting essay etc.

I say this in the spirit of someone who has read ALL of that great epic novel otherwise known as the SI Ultrasonic thread including what seemed like hourly postings of theoretical constructions of possible arrival times by possible delivery men... AND I bought one because of it AND I love it --- Thanks to all who wrote!!!

But honestly, shouldn''t other posters be able to follow their issue even if seems circular or to go on and on over a topic? As long as they keep posting, it''s obviously important to them... If you get bored, go to another thread, maybe?

Having done a little reading here, if pricescope isn''t the place to discuss how many angels can balance on an asscher crown of 17% or dance between the 3rd and 4th level of discrimination on an AGS 0 round, then I don''t know what is...

Well since it seems I have the ok from below to take this thread back on track, i''ll comment on the first post. I don''t know if i''ll use the word disrespectful...but I will say I thought the whole deraling of the main issue was kind of sad. I understand maybe why it was done....to possibly diffuse high emotions. Or even the somewhat selfish urge of someone tired of reading the same thing over and over again. I understand all of it. What I think is kind of sad though is that maybe it was a somewhat controversial thread but were all adults right? We can''t handle something like that without having to derail it? Then of course instead of just completly doing away with the thread...someone will then post something actually to topic and interesting! Then it''s kind of annoying to read through posts of people just goofing. I probably sound like an ahole but I think if something is posted in rocky talk....and obviously someone thought it would be good for debate or discussion, it''s annoying for it to get turned into something more suited for this page.

However I do find this somewhat disrespectful. Someone posted this in here because this is how they feel about something. It should never be disregarded. They may have started a whole new thread because they wanted people to see it, without bumping all the original stuff. I think it is sort of disrespectful that because maybe some didn''t like her point of view they decided to "hi jack" this thread as well.

 

[Mara]

sooooo, did you want a drink devient?

 

[strmrdr]

If I may get serious for 5 seconds....
The way I see it both the booze and the lemon pie is a reminder that we are if not all friends, we are fellow diamond nuts and PS members and the fellowship of the stone is more important than one-up-man-ship.

storms very tired 2c

now where did I leave my pepsi and punkie pie? (everyone knows storm always follows his own trail :}

 

[strmrdr]

man being serious is a lot of work..

Worst 5 seconds of my day since having to go to work early.

 

[monarch64]

STorm, if I had some pumpkie pie I would at least show you a pic, however, this girl has to get her DH and herself to bed...i"m sure Mara will be fine on her own, hee hee. Take care!

(oh, specially of those teeths!)

 

[Lorelei]

WAIT a minute....may I ask what 2 WWTers such as yourselves Miss Mara and Madam Monarch are doing eating lemon pie and drinking lemontini''s? HUH?? Naughty naughty, caught you ( wags finger!)

 

[gem-ini]

Date: 8/24/2006 12:21:58 AM
Author: devientdrow

Date: 8/23/2006 9:58:32 PM
Author:gem-ini



Date: 8/21/2006 6:30:23 PM
Author: Mara
This thread is getting insane!

''getting''?

it must be gettng time for some lemon pie

(*•.¸(`*•.¸¸.•*´)¸.•*)
¨`•.¸ *belle*¸.• ´¨
(¸.•*(¸.•*´ `*•.¸)*•.¸)













Just a thought...
Isn''t it a little disrespectful to decide that a thread has gone on too long or is too detailed or whatever just because an individual (or several) doesn''t like the way it''s going?? The thread started by fire&ice certainly seemed to speak to a reasonable issue for a diamond consumer internet forum -- and many people responded... What''s with the snide little pie and ice-cream hi-jack? If the thread had in fact stopped there, wouldn''t have gotten to read John Pollards interesting essay etc.

I say this in the spirit of someone who has read ALL of that great epic novel otherwise known as the SI Ultrasonic thread including what seemed like hourly postings of theoretical constructions of possible arrival times by possible delivery men... AND I bought one because of it AND I love it --- Thanks to all who wrote!!!

But honestly, shouldn''t other posters be able to follow their issue even if seems circular or to go on and on over a topic? As long as they keep posting, it''s obviously important to them... If you get bored, go to another thread, maybe?

Having done a little reading here, if pricescope isn''t the place to discuss how many angels can balance on an asscher crown of 17% or dance between the 3rd and 4th level of discrimination on an AGS 0 round, then I don''t know what is...

Well since it seems I have the ok from below to take this thread back on track, i''ll comment on the first post. I don''t know if i''ll use the word disrespectful...but I will say I thought the whole deraling of the main issue was kind of sad. I understand maybe why it was done....to possibly diffuse high emotions. Or even the somewhat selfish urge of someone tired of reading the same thing over and over again. I understand all of it. What I think is kind of sad though is that maybe it was a somewhat controversial thread but were all adults right? We can''t handle something like that without having to derail it? Then of course instead of just completly doing away with the thread...someone will then post something actually to topic and interesting! Then it''s kind of annoying to read through posts of people just goofing. I probably sound like an ahole but I think if something is posted in rocky talk....and obviously someone thought it would be good for debate or discussion, it''s annoying for it to get turned into something more suited for this page.

However I do find this somewhat disrespectful. Someone posted this in here because this is how they feel about something. It should never be disregarded. They may have started a whole new thread because they wanted people to see it, without bumping all the original stuff. I think it is sort of disrespectful that because maybe some didn''t like her point of view they decided to ''hi jack'' this thread as well.

Thanks devientdrow!

As I understand it, fire&ice was frustrated that so much of the discussion of diamonds on PS had come down to some very narrow parameters and specs and was suggesting that there might be more to it - the whole art vs science thing as Pollard and others discussed (and, in which, by the way, there were good arguments on both sides) In some ways it goes to the heart of what Pricescope''s about - what makes a diamond beautiful or valuable or personally treasured? Since some of the regulars have kicked the topic around for a while, should they just post the ideal specs on the home page, say that''s it, shut down the forums and go home? Or is it still an exciting and evolving discussion for everyone whether you are new or whether you personally have posted for years and heard it all before?

If people are politely willing to wade through post after post of the SI ultrasonic thread in the nature of:the package isn''t here yet, maybe it''ll come in a minute, maybe it will come tomorrow, why didn''t it come five minutes ago etc - without derailing it - why aren''t those posters kind enough to hear out fire&ice or let aljdewey and teagreen go at it... well forever if they want to? Why should anyone other than the PS moderator appoint themselves the guardian of when a thread should stop?

Some people will hang on through all the "goofing" to see if the thread gets picked up again but I''m sure you''re not the only one who finds it annoying and gives up... and maybe that''s another one of the "selfish" reasons it happens...
Doesn''t sound like the hallmark of an othewise cheerful forum that strm says is about the fellowship of the stone - more of a way to try to shut down a discussion that goes against certain opinions about diamonds without being honest enough to defend them on their own merits...

 

[pricescope]

Date: 8/24/2006 4:28:14 AM
Author: gem-ini

... Why should anyone other than the PS moderator appoint themselves the guardian of when a thread should stop? ...

Good point, Gem-ini. However...

Moderator's work is much more complex than just simple "black & white" situation. In each particular case there are shades of colors that include specifics of the topic, particular members, their previous history on the forum, the quality of the content, etc.

The thread in question was and still stays on friendly, light-hearted and positive tone. Everybody shares their opinions and general consensus was about balance. A light-humored break about lemon pie didn't make much harm but simply gave folks a break from revolving around the same stuff. The discussion continued after that on positive note.

I understand that some folks might not be happy about that off-topic turn but considering the history of the participants who familiar with this lemon-pie joke/tradition and knowing that no disrespect or offence was meant, we considered it not much of a problem.

If the "lemon-pie" thing would happen during discussion of someone's personal problem with high tensions and emotions (e.g. problems with quality of a product, or some other sort of confrontation) jokes like that would not be appropriate and we would ask to refrain from it.

Hope this makes sense.

Now, regarding this particular "Disrespectful" thread.

Gem-ini, please be assured that what I write below is not intended to make you or anyone else to feel bad singled out or offend you in any way or to show any sort of disrespect. Just an observation from the moderator with 6 year experience point of view ... it is a nightmare.

Although we understand that some members might not be always happy with other members' writings (for millions of reasons, sense of humor, style, content, tact, intelligence, quality, politeness, ego, etc.) and want to voice that opinion publicly, or sometimes give a lesson of good manners, or to teach the moderators how to moderate the forum, etc.

However, from our experience, nothing positive or creative ever came out of it. You are indulging yourself in venting but all what can come out of such posts is aggravation and hurt feelings. It eventually brings negativity into community. Moderator will always be stuck in the middle and blamed the first. In a blink of an eye people start badmouth each other and moderators, conspiracy theories popping up, etc.

That maybe fun for someone but not for us. Since this is our territory we will protect it from this stuff. Sorry.

We all should realize that in the Internet as in the real live there are many people with different ethics, cultural background, education, preference, etc. If someone irritates you, simply ignore it and focus on positive things that this community offers. (I guess there should be something positive, otherwise, why hang around here). If, however, you see serious problem or misconduct, address the issue to moderators and we would try our best to clarify the situation.

We had a few cases when members communicated their concerns to us privately about content posted on the forum. Sometimes we were able to find the common ground without much damage and drama on the public forums.

Rephrasing your sentence above (no disrespect meant!) - "Why should anyone other than the PS moderator appoint themselves the guardian of what other members can write?"

/idealbb/editor/cute/images/emotion-15.gif

 

[belle]

oooohhhh sorry i missed all the fun!

so many points to be made here but i think leonid has done a great job of explaining the essence of ps. he and irina work so hard to continue making these forums educational, safe and fun. for that, i am thankful.

i would just like to add a quote from fire&ice that she posted in her thread that is being referenced here as being disrespectful because it went off topic

Date: 8/21/2006 8:20:31 PM
Author: fire&ice
I am very glad this thread has turned to something I *actually* like by *tasting*. I do not like pie. Though the symmetry could far outways the ability to like - but if it did glow under black lights - well different parameters all together.

One time, I did see a pie I liked just by the specs. Pecans, bready stuff & sweet lookin stuff - who would miss. I did like - but found out it was just the pecans that I liked.

and the lighthearted point i''m trying to make is....

she didn''t seem to think it was disrespectful, why should anyone else?

thank you leonid and irina for everything you do!

 

[fire&ice]

Disrepectful - no. Arrogant - yes.

And, to add my perspective on the moderators - intervene only when things get personal nasty. Since I don''t like pie, I didn''t take it personally.

Now, if someone dissed my pecan pie - well "thems fighin words".

 

[widget]

Well, heaven help the poor moderators if they ever felt the need to start reining in benign OTs and digressions! I think they have enough to do!

My two cents: I don''t think the digression into lemon pies, etc on F&I''s thread was disrespectful. I did find it at first irritating and ultimately incredibly boring. (I was still very interested in the topic at hand.)

I do find the food/drink digressions in this thread disrespectful, however.

JMO
widget

 

[CaptAubrey]

Good Lord--this is the internet--Threadjacks Happen.

An internet community is not a machine that can be fined-tuned at will. That Leonid has kept this one going and healthy for ~five years now is frankly a miracle, IMO.

 

[pricescope]

Captain you made me

 

[Mara]

haha capt...i know isn't it?! i a miracle for us in fact as i could not imagine the internet without PS.

after 3+ years on here, i say live and let live. no one likes internet 'hall monitors' saying what people can't or can do, if they are not the moderators. but people always try to be hall monitors. it must be human nature. if you don't like it, don't participate...there is plenty more to be discussed here on PS if one topic or off-topic discussion is not to one's liking. it irks when people who don't even know the score come in and go 'well that was WRONG' and pitches a fit. well maybe you think so and maybe i don't but whatever. does it REALLY matter? not in the end, nope. strm is right that we may not all be the best of friends, but we understand each other and we make do with tons of different personalities all meshed together, and people rarely get offended which is awesome.

as for the merits of discussion on something like her topic...you are too new to remember this gemini, well almost anyone here is too new to remember this...but maybe F&I and capt aubrey and aljdewey, but F&I herself coined a term for ME in the past called 'white off rice' because i can be so bullheaded stubborn about what i believe is right....like a dog with a bone. i could have interjected that into that thread and said that to her instead of lemon pie, but you would have thought THAT was disrespectful too probably.

but she probably would have laughed. history. knowing it can be important before trying to call someone on the carpet.

in the end who really cares. let people do what they want as long as the moderator has no complaint, why should a newbie, or anyone really?

 

[devientdrow]

Date: 8/24/2006 10:44:15 AM
Author: widget
Well, heaven help the poor moderators if they ever felt the need to start reining in benign OTs and digressions! I think they have enough to do!

My two cents: I don''t think the digression into lemon pies, etc on F&I''s thread was disrespectful. I did find it at first irritating and ultimately incredibly boring. (I was still very interested in the topic at hand.)

I do find the food/drink digressions in this thread disrespectful, however.

JMO
widget

My thoughts exactly. Like I stated above I didn''t think it was really disrespectful in F & I''s thread. I echo Widgets sentiments exactly. However this was another poster on this forum who obviously had a concern. I understand what the moderator is saying about the whole nature of this thread. How it can bring negativity into the nature of PS. But honestly watching people do the same "threadjacking" to the person who was complaining about it in the first place, well aren''t you kind of doing it to just be malicious? It pretty much reads to me as:

"Lighten up...it''s not big deal. It happens all the time. It''s an inside joke, and well you didn''t like it....so now i''m going to do it to you again just to aggravate you."

That seems just as negative to me as someone venting.
JMO.

BTW....i''m really trying not to offend anyone here. A lot of you making the food posts are people I really like reading/responding too. I think your all really great people and I hope you don''t take this wrong.

 

[devientdrow]

Date: 8/24/2006 12:25:02 PM
Author: Mara
haha capt...i know isn''t it?! i a miracle for us in fact as i could not imagine the internet without PS.

after 3+ years on here, i say live and let live. no one likes internet ''hall monitors'' saying what people can''t or can do. if you don''t like it, don''t participate...there is plenty more to be discussed here on PS if one topic or off-topic discussion is not to one''s liking. it irks when people who don''t even know the score come in and go ''well that was WRONG'' and pitches a fit. well maybe you think so and maybe i don''t but whatever. does it REALLY matter? not in the end, nope. strm is right that we may not all be the best of friends, but we understand each other and we make do with tons of different personalities all meshed together, and people rarely get offended which is awesome.

as for the merits of discussion on something like her topic...you are too new to remember this gemini, well almost anyone here is too new to remember this...but maybe F&I and capt aubrey and aljdewey, but F&I herself coined a term for ME in the past called ''white off rice'' because i can be so bullheaded stubborn about what i believe is right....like a dog with a bone. i could have interjected that into that thread and said that to her instead of lemon pie, but you would have thought THAT was disrespectful too probably.

but she probably would have laughed. history. knowing it can be important before trying to call someone on the carpet.

in the end who really cares. let people do what they want as long as the moderator has no complaint, why should a newbie?

Ok well I do think that was disrespectful. I mean were saying her original post is negative and all but your whole last post just seemed completly negative to me. If were all so good at not being offended why say something like that? It kind of just seems outright mean. Obviously the starter of this thread hasn''t been around all that long but does that mean she can''t have an opinion? It shouldn''t be valid because she hasn''t be on this forum for 3+ years?

 

[CaptAubrey]

Date: 8/24/2006 12:25:02 PM
Author: Mara

as for the merits of discussion on something like her topic...you are too new to remember this gemini, well almost anyone here is too new to remember this...but maybe F&I and capt aubrey and aljdewey, but F&I herself coined a term for ME in the past called ''white off rice'' because i can be so bullheaded stubborn about what i believe is right

Yes.

But you seem to have mellowed since then. Remember ICY WHITE DIAMONDS!!!! ?

 

[pricescope]

Ok, guys. This is turning personal as I feared. I'm closing it.

There are and always will be misreadings and misunderstanding on the Internet forums. Please don't get mad about each other and stay away discussing anybody's personal writing style. It most probably makes things worse.

Let's focus on trying to make things better instead