- Joined
- Aug 14, 2009
- Messages
- 27,471
For me, at least, it isn't active avoidance so much as... having no compulsion to make any effort to meet. I can't imagine avoiding someone at a small get-together, or refuse to shake someone's hand, or refuse to sit next to someone - I very much hope we're all long past high school!
But at a large get-together I wouldn't make any effort to single that person out for more conversation; if that person was in town I wouldn't make any effort to meet him/her.
I do my best not to make snap-judgments, and to always be open to being "proven wrong" about a judgment I've already made. But after seven years on this forum... yes, I feel comfortable knowing that there is a very small number of people I'm just not going to get along with any better IRL than I do online, and I really have no reason or desire to try.
It seems important to note that "getting along with" doesn't mean "agreeing with" - there are plenty of people I disagree strongly with on some issues (and agree with on others) who are on my Would Love To Meet list. Just like in-person... it isn't that we disagree, but how we interact with each other in handling that disagreement, that makes all the difference!
But at a large get-together I wouldn't make any effort to single that person out for more conversation; if that person was in town I wouldn't make any effort to meet him/her.
I do my best not to make snap-judgments, and to always be open to being "proven wrong" about a judgment I've already made. But after seven years on this forum... yes, I feel comfortable knowing that there is a very small number of people I'm just not going to get along with any better IRL than I do online, and I really have no reason or desire to try.
It seems important to note that "getting along with" doesn't mean "agreeing with" - there are plenty of people I disagree strongly with on some issues (and agree with on others) who are on my Would Love To Meet list. Just like in-person... it isn't that we disagree, but how we interact with each other in handling that disagreement, that makes all the difference!