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Engagement Rings in Korea

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danniboi

Rough_Rock
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Mar 12, 2010
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I''''m having a hard time choosing a diamond for my girlfriend''''s engagement ring. She is Korean, living in Seoul now. Being a diamond newbie, I''''ve been told by several people that diamond preferences in the US, for emaxple, tend to go for size, settling on quality, and that in Europe things tend to be the other way around.
So, does anyone know which parameters are considered more important for an engagement ring diamond in Korea?

Thanks a lot,
Daniel

p.s. I would guess Japanese tastes in jewelry aren''''t that different from Korean ones, so any information regarding Japan could be relevant as well...
 
People here usually get shot here when they stereotype or generalize about groups of people, but here goes...
Personally I see nothing wrong with observations about groups.
We all realize that generalizations do not apply to every member of a group anyway.
Just because we are all equal does not mean we are the same.

I think to be on the safe side you should stay with higher clarity and color.

I've read here on PS that one reason few D IFs are found here in the US is because a disproportionately large number are sent to that part of the world where there is more demand.

BTW, this forum is for sharing pics of your rings.
You may want to post your question in Rocky Talk.
 
Date: 3/12/2010 5:28:22 PM
Author: kenny
People here usually get shot here when they stereotype or generalize about groups of people, but here goes...

Personally I see nothing wrong with observations about groups.

We all realize that generalizations do not apply to every member of a group anyway.

Just because we are all equal does not mean we are the same.


I think to be on the safe side you should stay with higher clarity and color.


I''ve read here on PS that one reason few D IFs are found here in the US is because a disproportionately large number are sent to that part of the world where there is more demand.


BTW, this forum is for sharing pics of your rings.

You may want to post your question in Rocky Talk.

I think Kenny''s correct on the higher color/clarity. It''s important, I think, that the diamond be considered "perfect" (or as close to). At least, that is my experience with Koreans (not Korean-American, as I am) and their preferences. But, your girlfriend could be totally different, y''know?

Clarification - is she Korean, or Korean-American? I''m Korean-American and even before finding PS I preferred size. Now, after having been on here for almost two years, I definitely prefer size as long as 1) I don''t see too much color/yellow; and 2) I don''t see any inclusions with my naked eye. Don''t need a D IF, and I don''t feel that, say, an H SI1 is "bad" quality, y''know? But that is me, and your girlfriend could feel very differently, or exactly the same - hard to tell.

I think it''s great that you''re trying to figure out what she wants, but honestly, it''s so hard to figure out something so important based on generalizations. I would definitely ask her and see what she thinks (like, say "Friend X is thinking of buying a ring, but he can''t decide between a 1 ct. H VS2 and a 0.50 ct. D IF - what do you think?").

Good luck!
 
Yeah, there's no basis for picking a diamond from "korean tastes"

However I am Korean-American and I am in love with Emerald and Cushion cuts. My parents and most of my Korean friends hate Emerald Cuts for themselves though. In Korea, you would b hard pressed to find an Emerald Cut e-ring. My mother doesn't like my Emerald cut constantly saying that Koreans usually love round brilliants as in it seems to be the ever so popular trend and does likes it clean and simple, like a solitaire or simple channel band.

I would just ask her for some pictures or any ideas on what kind of ring she likes.
 
The most important thing is what she wants.
 
She actually is Korean, born and raised. And as a matter of fact, she isn''t that much of a jewelery enthusiast. The thing is that her father actually owns a jewelry store and since a Korean girl being engaged to a foreigner, and of a different religious denomination, is a pretty huge deal over there (there have been reports of mothers fainting when being told the news), I''m trying to do the most I can to make a good impression on the family.
I don''t think that bringing the right diamond is THE critical factor that would make her father accept the fact his daughter is being engaged to a foreigner, but it definitely couldn''t hurt either...

So, if the choice is between:
1. 0.5 carat D color, IF clarity, excel. cut, excel. symmetry, excel. polish, with no fluorescence and with a GIA certificate.
2. 0.75 carat E color, VVS1 clarity, excel. cut, excel. symmetry, excel. polish, with no fluorescence and with a GIA certificate.
What would you go for?
 
You know, I've never been a fan of E/F VVS combos as a GOAL to shoot for, as in, it's pretty close to "perfect" but it's not. What exactly is /almost/ perfect???

If you want to keep it to very high quality, I think I'd do either D/IF (perfect but small), D VS ("D color" cachet) or F VS (just nice, high quality, and save lots of $$.)

Where do you plan on living?
 
HI:

Have you discussed what she wants, with her? IMHO that is the most important variable.

If you are planning a surprise ring/engagement, then I recommend going with a vendor who has a great return/upgrade policy should your choice not be what she would have otherwise choosen.

cheers--Sharon
 
Date: 3/12/2010 8:02:58 PM
Author: JulieN
You know, I've never been a fan of E/F VVS combos as a GOAL to shoot for, as in, it's pretty close to 'perfect' but it's not. What exactly is /almost/ perfect???


If you want to keep it to very high quality, I think I'd do either D/IF (perfect but small), D VS ('D color' cachet) or F VS (just nice, high quality, and save lots of $$.)


Where do you plan on living?

I agree that D IF would be the most impressive choice, a half-carat is a nice size, especially if her finger size is small. And I like Julie's suggestion of D color, and VVS2 or VS1 clarity to go up in size a little bit

How important is cut quality to you? A stone that is better cut (GIA Ex/Ex/Ex or AGS 0) will sparkle more than a stone with a lower cut grade (if you need more information about cut grading, just ask). Also, is it important that the stone display a hearts and arrows pattern (eight-sided star pattern) under a microscope? Again, if you need more information about hearts and arrows patterning, just ask.

And, finally, do you have a budget? If you'd like us to make some suggestions for diamonds, let us know. We can give you the links to some diamonds that meet your specifications.
 
I can''t be 100% sure I''m accurate, but from what I understand from being Taiwanese-American and growing up with a lot of Korean friends "face" is very important.

Given your situation, I would say that it would be best to put on your best "face", realizing that you are not only wooing her, but her family as well. While the ring might be important, I would think an overall charm offensive for the family, especially her parents, would be best as the tradition in Asian cultures is that the potential groom is considered to be "taking" the potential bride so there are a series of traditions to follow in order to get engaged. Perhaps do a little research on Korean marriage/engagement traditions. For example, in Chinese/Taiwanese culture, 24K gold is the standard for it''s purity.

Given that, I would guess that quality is most important. In Chinese culture, sharp edges on things tend to be considered bad omens, so princess cuts would be less desirable.

How traditional is her family?
 
"What she wants" is a modern western value.
Though hard to see, sometimes my values are not right for others.

Here is the US, the individual is the primary unit.
In some other cultures what the family and social circle expect is given more weight.

We just have no way of knowing how this all plays out in this situation .
 
Date: 3/12/2010 8:46:49 PM
Author: kenny
''What she wants'' is a modern western value.

Good point, Kenny. We also don''t know if the ring is to be a surprise.
 
I think this is a very interesting topic. I was in Seoul 2 years ago and noticed that women wore mainly wedding bands and not solitares/ engagement rings. When I did see women with your typical engagement ring they were quite plain, and on the "smaller" side-- I didn''t see over .50 carats.


The big trend that I noticed that I thought was interesting was matching wedding bands (with or without diamonds) for bride and groom. This seems to be very popular there. It seems that the emphasis is on the wedding band rather than the engagement ring. Honestly, I would say more modest in size would be the way to go and higher color, clarity etc. as others have said.

Good luck!
 
Westjenn, I think you might also be seeing "couples' rings". It's a really popular concept there - matching bands for those in serious relationships.

I agree with Julie on this - so basically here are the options (I think):

1) If she was into jewelry and/or had strong personal preferences, listen to what she wants!

BUT

If she doesn't have a strong preference (and you said she's not really into jewelry) or she's traditional-minded:

2) Get her a smaller D IF (but don't sacrifice cut!)
3) Get her a larger D VS
4) Get her an F VS

Unless your situation falls into #1, I would say it would be safer to get her a D IF or D VS - especially if her father is a jeweler and would know about these things. It would impress him, if she's not that into jewelry, the fact that her dad is impressed will impress HER, etc.
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Btw, as others have asked, what is her finger size and what is your budget?
 
Can you ask any of her friends what would be really appreciated by her and her family?
 
I wonder if her father would be offended if you didn''t ask him for help with the ring. I have no clue about Korean culture, just something that came to mind when I read your post.
 
Just to get an idea of what's available from PS vendors, I went to the top of this screen and clicked on PRICES, then selected Search by Cut.

I entered:
Round Excellent cut
.4 - .6 ct
D - E
IF - VVS1
GIA and AGS only

It returned 14 diamonds, priced from $1,250 to $3,060.
Two are D IF.
 
Date: 3/12/2010 9:48:59 PM
Author: JeraVae
I wonder if her father would be offended if you didn''t ask him for help with the ring. I have no clue about Korean culture, just something that came to mind when I read your post.
This was my thought too.

My neighbor is Korean, born and raised, & has been here for a decade. She has a 1+ solitaire that she always wears, even when gardening.

Is there an aunt or uncle you can ask if you want it to be a huge surprise? Perhaps even her mother or father.

What does her mother/aunt/relatives wear? That may be your biggest clue. If her father is in the jewellery business and buy her whatever she wants, see what she has. If it''s good enough for mom, it should work for your fiance.

Still pick the company with the best upgrade policy just in case you get it not perfect.
 
For what it's worth, I have a ex-colleague who's married to a Korean girl (born and raised in Seoul). She has a 1.5ct ering and I seem to remember it has high specs, something like F colour and higher clarity (though I don't remember what it is). It's generally true that *most* Asians prefer higher colours and clarities. I know I've been slammed before on PS for "generalising" but it is what it is, ya'know!! I've lived in Asia for the past 15 years and this is what I've observed/ been told. I do however know someone else in Singapore who totally goes for size and has diamonds that are K-L coloured.

Moreover, the commonly held belief that Asian women prefer smaller erings may or may not be true. Like I said, my ex-colleague's wife wears a 1.5ct and last I heard, she wanted a larger stone. In fact, in China (or at least in Shanghai where we now live), although most Chinese women I see on a day-to-day basis don't wear a diamond ering (or any ering at all), I've seen quite a few with larger diamonds (around 1.5ct and upwards). My friends here including a local Shanghainese woman have 2ct and above. There's a hospital admistrative person where I go that has a very beautiful and very sparkly ering (prob abt 2ct) and earrings (I'd guess 1.5-2ctw). I've seen random women on the street with eye-popping honkers. What's interesting also is that a lot (I don't know how many, LOL) of mainland Chinese women go to Hong Kong to buy larger stones (with CASH!
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). My SIL who's in the jewellery business has told me this and I've also heard this from other jewellery vendors that I visit.

So my point is: it's totally a personal thing. I'd, if possible, ask your GF what she'd like, unless it's a surprise in which case I'd try and find out from her mother and friends as others have suggested.
 
My local jeweler is Korean and he laughed at me when I made an ugly face at the mention of FLOURESENCE.
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He said in Asia they really like flouresence.
 
The ring will be a surprise, and her parents will only know about me after I have asked for her hand.
Is fluorescence really not an issue? Won''t a fluorescent diamond lose all it''s fire and colorlessness?
I have found a 0.55 carat, D color, IF clarity, excellent cut, polish and symmetry, H&A and medium fluorescence that I can afford, but I''m not sure...
 
Hi, danniboi,
I''m Japanese born and raised so I may understand what your concerns are..
They definately go for higher color and clarity, so I think it''s good idea to go for these. But the question is: Will she live in States after you guys get married? In States (and Australia which I live), people go for the size. So maybe it''s good idea to think about "afterwards".

In Japan, they tend to get higher color and clarity, size is generally small. But I live in Australia and I am Australian average size (which is much taller than average Japanese), so I suit bigger size, and I got 1.39ct! Is she small? Is she tall? Does she have long fingers? Considering those facts may help you choose...

Good luck!
 
I think you should find out what she and her family wants somehow.

Although I am not that familiar w/ the whole wedding tradition in Korea, I am Korean and here is what I know. Please keep in mind that not every family will be like this, especially if they are familiar with western culture and/or wealthy:

- When I tried buying a diamond ring in Korea, the jewellers emphasized on colour and clarity. Most women in Korea are not knowledgeable about diamonds so they believe what they are told by the jewellers.............. I even heard some jewellers tell me to "choose the bigger stone than what I actually want because the diamond will lose a bit of volume once it is set". ---> ????????????? And lots of women don't mind using Signity(some sort of cz) for melee diamonds or diamond necklaces.

- Getting proposed with a diamond ring is many women's dream but quite a few women say a diamond ring is just too much for casual wear. I have seen some that prefer to get proposed with a car/bag/watch/earrings/necklace/simple band/small diamond band, etc.

- Groom's family decides what kind of wedding jewelry the bride will receive. The jewelry set must be prepared in odd numbers, e.g. 1 or 3 or 5 sets, etc. The set could include diamond/cz earring/necklace/ring, rubies, sapphires, pearls, pure gold, etc. This usually depends on the wedding dowry she brings and what the guy's bringing into the marriage(house, car, whatever). It sounds weird, but I believe many Korean families do.... So, even if the woman was getting married w/o an engagement ring because there was no proposal, the groom's family will give some sort of wedding/engagement ring to the bride. There is also gift exchanged between families, too(clothing/bags, electronics, beddings, furnitures, etc).

- There is usually the "couple ring" and the "diamond ring" for the bride. "Couple ring" is kinda like wedding bands. "Diamond ring" is mostly like diamond engagement ring. Lots of women wear the engagement ring only on special occasion.

- Lots of Korean families will understand the culture you are coming from and may accept non-Korean wedding tradition & will be ok w/ just a diamond ring then go for a wedding. But I believe there is lots of research for you to do, in order to "save your future in-laws' face" and keep everyone happy.


Good luck.
 
Date: 3/13/2010 4:50:22 AM
Author: danniboi
The ring will be a surprise, and her parents will only know about me after I have asked for her hand.

Is fluorescence really not an issue? Won''t a fluorescent diamond lose all it''s fire and colorlessness?

I have found a 0.55 carat, D color, IF clarity, excellent cut, polish and symmetry, H&A and medium fluorescence that I can afford, but I''m not sure...

Medium blue fluorescence should not post a problem. It will not cause the diamond to lose its fire or colorlessness, unless it''s what is referred to as an "over-blue" stone.
Here is some information on fluorescence
link

Which vendor is the stone you''re looking at with? If they have a good return policy (and my recommendation is you work only with vendors who have a good return policy of at least two weeks) you can order the stone, view it in real life, take it to an appraiser if you''d like, and send it back if it does not meet your specifications.
 
Date: 3/13/2010 4:50:22 AM
Author: danniboi
The ring will be a surprise, and her parents will only know about me after I have asked for her hand.
Is fluorescence really not an issue? Won't a fluorescent diamond lose all it's fire and colorlessness?
I have found a 0.55 carat, D color, IF clarity, excellent cut, polish and symmetry, H&A and medium fluorescence that I can afford, but I'm not sure...
Yep, according to my jeweler not only is it a non-issue in Asia, but a desirable trait. Keep in mind this is only one guy's opinion. He's a younger guy, but a very talented jeweler. We had a long discussion about it.

In part of the conversation he mentioned that while at clubs people would see it flouresce and know it was real. That's good to know for the next time me and the kids go out clubbing.
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(Although the people at laser tag might be impressed).

Look up flouresence in the search field. There are a lot of helpful threads on it to show you the positives and negatives.

I must admit, he was right that I was biased against flouresence without even knowing much about it. My next jewelry project is a pear pendant. I want one with strong blue flouresence.
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While we are generalizing here, I didn''t think florensence is popular in Asia.
 
I'm Korean born and partially raised. I go to Korea about 2-3 times a year now and I have to say that size, colour and clarity really depends on people's income and social status. For instance, in Gangnam area (affluent districts) it's quite common to see women with 3ct+ rings and other baubbles doing their grocery shopping.

I do think that people tend to prefer higher clarity and colour but I also think size counts too. Most of my cousins and girlfriends prefer size over colour/clarity so long as the c/c falls within the white and higher clarity range. But it could be just the people I know.

Also, I don't think it's customary for couples to choose their own rings. I believe money is exchanged between the groom and brides' family which is then spent on "gifts" for the bride/groom and their family. This will include buying jewelry for the bride. Whatever money is left over is handed to the bride so she can start a savings plan for the couple's new home.

Talking specifically about jewelry, the more traditional approach is for the groom's mother to give "harm" to the bride which consists of 3 sets of matching jewelry (earrings, necklace, ring, bracelet). Traditionally they were amber, jade and coral or gold but now days I hear it's diamonds/sapphires/emeralds/rubies/pearls/gold. I do think this really depends on what people can afford though.

I think it's very considerate to think about what the general cultural preference is but I do think it'll help to ask your bride to be what she'd prefer. I think E, VVS1 or 2 is still considered premium colour and clarity amongst Koreans (really in anyone's book!)

All the best!
 
I never realized that there were so many Koreans here on PS!

Anyway, I''m also Korean and yes, it all depends on the person, and mainly, her socioeconomic status. I''ve noticed that the major deciding point is what her engaged/married friends have, and she''ll most likely want what they have or better.

In my experiences, size does matter more than it should, as does color AND clarity. Cut also matters least, because it is the most difficult to assess, especially with the naked eye.

Good luck though! It is definitely tough for Koreans to accept interracial relationships, and obviously, marriage, but love is love!
 
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