GAH! Feeling frustrated...

[anchor31]

I thought this was settled, but... apparently it''s not. *sigh*

J just told me his boss knows a jeweler that makes jewelery "for a good price". He said he''s going to check it out tomorrow. After fighting the urge to throw a tantrum because I just want him to buy the WF ring already!!, I took a deep breath and asked if the diamonds are certified. He said he''ll ask. I told him I don''t mind him checking them out, but I WANT TO SEE THE CERTS!!! He said he''ll send them to me. I reminded him cut is most important, and suggested he looked for AGS 0 stones. He said he''ll see what they have, and he said he wants to get me the best, so he wants to keep looking. Again, I had to take a deep breath. It''s doubtful he''ll find better (better than the Expert Selection AGS 0 G-SI1 I picked would be an ACA...) for cheaper, especially at a B&M store...

I guess I can''t blame him for wanting to keep looking, he''s probably a bit skittish still about buying online and it does give him the time to save up for it but... Now I know what I want. I found it and it''s perfect. It''s even under his budget by 250-ish bucks. I just want him to finish saving up and buy it, you know?

Life''s pretty hectic with school being absolute hell and summer job search and the waiting on top of it, so I''m probably overreacting. But I wouldn''t want all my researching to go to waste and I certainly wouldn''t want him to get ripped off for a piece of junk. Hopefully he''ll see their quality/prices and reconsider...

Any tips on what to say or do? This is making me even more nervous...

A good night''s sleep should help, I guess!

*sigh*

 

[firebirdgold]

Bleh! how frustrating!!

Try hot choclate made with real milk before going to bed. It helps me to calm down sometimes. That and imagining hitting my bf over the head with a nerf baseball bat!

 

[anchor31]

lol, thanks Wren! I think I''m going to have a "talk" with the picture of him I keep on my nightstand... I swear, it works better than talking to him... I guess it helps me vent to excess pressure and then it''s easier for me to deal with the situation and actually talk to him...

Yum... Hot chocolate...

 

[sunkist]

Ohhh, Anchor!! I know how you feel, it sounds exactly like something my BF would do. He too seems a bit wary about buying online, even though I''ve done the research and know it''s a good deal! Give him a AGS0 Ideal chart so he can compare #s on the certs. And tell him he has to look at it through a loop and see an IdealScope photo!!! Make sure he knows you have to see all these things to make sure youre making a good buy. My guess is that the B&M will not have all of these. So then maybe he''ll feel better about buying your stone at WF

What my boy has been doing is looking at stones on Ebay

Man.... what am I going to do with him! He''s a great Ebayer though and he sees how shady all these diamond Ebayers are, thank goodness! I can''t wait to get him totally on track with buying online (and not eBay)

Will he not let you go with him to the jeweler? Good luck Anchor !

 

[anchor31]

EBAY??!! Oh dear... I hope he doesn''t buy it there!

Thanks for the tips, sunkist... He can''t take me with him tomorrow because I''m 300 miles away for school. Not very convenient right now!

I guess that if it turns out he really doesn''t want to buy online, I''ll tell him to wait for me to come back (I''m moving on April 29th) and take me to Birks again. We''ll see what they have that fits his budget and pick from there. At least they have top-quality cut diamonds, I colour and up and SI clarity and up. We certainly wouldn''t get a .52 ct for 2k, but I can''t force him to buy online if he doesn''t want to, right?

Can''t help being disappointed, though. *sigh*

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 3/15/2006 8:46:37 PM
Author:anchor31
J just told me his boss knows a jeweler that makes jewelery ''for a good price''. He said he''s going to check it out tomorrow.

If it''s any consolation, it''s probably best that he check''s out the boss''s friends place just for political reasons. Hopefully your fella has enough backbone to stand up for what he (I really mean you) wants.

It DRIVES ME CRAZY how many people think they know "a deal" or have "a wholesale jeweler" ... what makes them the expert after one (probably lousy) diamond purchase. People just like to think they know something & want others to think they do too. Me: I know nothing ''bout nothing!

 

[sunkist]

Date: 3/15/2006 9:37:20 PM
Author: anchor31
EBAY??!! Oh dear... I hope he doesn''t buy it there!


Thanks for the tips, sunkist... He can''t take me with him tomorrow because I''m 300 miles away for school. Not very convenient right now!


I guess that if it turns out he really doesn''t want to buy online, I''ll tell him to wait for me to come back (I''m moving on April 29th) and take me to Birks again. We''ll see what they have that fits his budget and pick from there. At least they have top-quality cut diamonds, I colour and up and SI clarity and up. We certainly wouldn''t get a .52 ct for 2k, but I can''t force him to buy online if he doesn''t want to, right?


Can''t help being disappointed, though. *sigh*

What do our guys have against buying a diamond online??? These companies have great return policies! If you get the diamond and don''t like it, you can send it back and are only out shipping costs! I don''t know what shipping costs are for overnight and insurance, but it can''t be more than what $30?

Oops! I forgot your living so far away from BF

I agree with Deco though, that he go to at least satisfy his boss. But if you say he''s still saving $ , them at least you know he won''t be plopping down any $ at the B&M tomorrow ( or whenever) without you having a chance to inquire!

 

[anchor31]

deco, that made me laugh. Thanks!

Date: 3/15/2006 9:53:02 PM
Author: sunkist
What do our guys have against buying a diamond online??? These companies have great return policies! If you get the diamond and don''t like it, you can send it back and are only out shipping costs! I don''t know what shipping costs are for overnight and insurance, but it can''t be more than what $30?

I KNOW!!! It drives me insane. But hey, it''s their money, right?

Date: 3/15/2006 9:53:02 PM
Author: sunkist
But if you say he''s still saving $ , them at least you know he won''t be plopping down any $ at the B&M tomorrow ( or whenever) without you having a chance to inquire!

Yeah, that is reassuring. I specifically asked for the certs because there''s no way I''m letting him buy a stone without seeing the certs first. And I''m telling you... No certs, no ideal cuts, NO DEAL!!!

Well, good night. I really should get some rest. Thanks all.

 

[stermag]

Oh my goodness, Anchor - I do understand your frustration. I mean, why fix what ain''t broken, right?! You have found a diamond and a ring that meets ALL of your requirements (beautiful, quality rock UNDER HIS BUDGET!), and yet he feels the urge to keep looking!

Maybe the diamond you found fails to meet just one requirement? YOU found it and not him. Maybe he secretly wishes that he, himself, found the perfect diamond for you... because he thinks that it was his responsibility to do so and now he hopes to find something similar but on his own? Just a guess.

I don''t know.

My boyfriend spent a total of 20 minutes researching my engagement ring... and really, he was just looking up the composition and properties of various platinum alloys (he''s a chemist, you see, so that was up his alley), but that''s where it ended. He had no qualms buying what I, singlehandedly, chose. But that''s him, and that''s us. I''m okay with that.

That being said, if he showed as much interest as your boyfriend and tried as hard to find THE diamond... I can''t help but think I would love him for it. As it stands, I''m glad I have plenty of other reasons, otherwise we''d be in trouble

 

[E B]

Anchor,

Perhaps you could send him a list of ideal proportions (depth, table, crown and pavilion heights) so that when he''s looking at diamonds, he can consult the list. That way, if he DOES buy a diamond from this certain vendor, he''ll be getting a beautiful one.

 

[firebirdgold]

He''ll probably take one look at B&M quality and prices and come running back to your stone! Don''t worry, it''ll come out all right. .. buuut just to be on the safe side send him the ideal specs including crown angle and all that.

 

[anchor31]

Stermag - You may be right. I''m not sure... When we came back from shopping, he told me: "Give me your choice, and I''ll buy it." So... I chose. He probably thinks maybe he can find cheaper somewhere. We all know he can find cheaper, but it''d also be cheap, if you know what I mean.

Ebree and Wren - Will do. I''m off to look for an ideal proportions chart... any help would be welcome.

 

[akw94]

Anchor, i''m sure it''d be a bit annoyed too if he told me to choose and then wanted to keep looking. Men can be a real pain sometimes!! I think it''s good advice to have something for him to have in his hand when he goes looking, that way he can compare. Maybe he just needs to see for himself that the other options aren''t as good. If he has a way to compare and can easily see that, he''ll most likely come back to your choice. It''s doubtful that he would want to buy something that he knows isn''t as good as what you''ve found. And the good thing is, it doesn''t sound like he''d do anything w/o you guys talking.
It''s sounds like he''s just being thorough (in his mind anyway). I''m sure my bf would want to check out everything before going online too. He''s already said it makes him a bit uncomfortable so I may have the same problem!

 

[anchor31]

Date: 3/16/2006 10:40:36 AM
Author: amy94
Anchor, i''m sure it''d be a bit annoyed too if he told me to choose and then wanted to keep looking. Men can be a real pain sometimes!! I think it''s good advice to have something for him to have in his hand when he goes looking, that way he can compare. Maybe he just needs to see for himself that the other options aren''t as good. If he has a way to compare and can easily see that, he''ll most likely come back to your choice. It''s doubtful that he would want to buy something that he knows isn''t as good as what you''ve found. And the good thing is, it doesn''t sound like he''d do anything w/o you guys talking.
It''s sounds like he''s just being thorough (in his mind anyway). I''m sure my bf would want to check out everything before going online too. He''s already said it makes him a bit uncomfortable so I may have the same problem!

That''s what I think too. I guess I''m feeling frustrated because, like Stermag said, why fix what ain''t broken??

Anyway, I found an AGS0 chart on GOG.com and e-mailed him, telling him those numbers must ALL be on the certs. If they''re not there, it''s BAD. I advised that he looked with a loupe too, made sure it was eyeclean and very white-looking.

Now, all I can do is wait (and go up to the school to work on my biochem lab report...

). Keep your fingers crossed for me!

 

[allycat0303]

Hey Anchor,

Just out of curiosity, what`s the name of the store?

My friend got an uncerted, 1 carat diamond from a jeweler in Montreal, and it`s GORGEOUS! Beautiful, stunning, a pricess cut (which can be terribly horrible to pick out), and I would have no issues whatsoever with it. There`s some really good stores in Montreal that carry great diamonds.

I think we get a little number obsessed on PS. Don`t worry, your boy woun`t buy anything horrible. He`s going to look. Not all mall stores are evil.

I think part of the whole thing with buying a stone online is when their friends ask them, "where`d you buy it" and they say online, then people think they are crazed.

 

[anchor31]

Thanks ally, you''re right. I don''t know the name of the store, actually, I''ll ask him. Can you tell me where your friend got her stone?

 

[anchor31]

Well, his boss was supposed to give him the name of the place today so he could go and see, but he didn''t get the name today for some reason. J doesn''t work Friday afternoons, so he might go tomorrow PM...

He''s seen the importance of cut and clarity while shopping after comparing the diamonds at Birks vs chain maul stores, and he knows he can get a knockout .52 ct for 1380$, so he''s got enough knowledge and is too smart to get ripped off. This stage of waiting is just making me really anxious...

Allycat - I''d love to know where your friend got her stone please, if you can tell me. I could tell J to go and have a look, if he wants.

 

[allycat0303]

Hey Anchor,

Glad your feeling better.

The name of the store is Bijoutrie Robert Richer, 309 Dorval Avenue, Dorval. She got her ring there because they are the only in Montreal that carries Tacori, but the stone is seriously beautiful. Keep us updated!

 

[anchor31]

Thanks, ally! I''ll give him the address.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 3/15/2006 8:46:37 PM
Author:anchor31

Any tips on what to say or do? This is making me even more nervous...

A good night''s sleep should help, I guess!

*sigh*

ask him for his CC# and buy that stone from WF.

 

[anchor31]

Date: 3/17/2006 9:40:22 PM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 3/15/2006 8:46:37 PM
Author:anchor31

Any tips on what to say or do? This is making me even more nervous...

A good night''s sleep should help, I guess!

*sigh*

ask him for his CC# and buy that stone from WF.

Haha! Honestly though, I''ve thought about it for a second there, but I keep hoping it won''t come to that!

 

[FireGoddess]

Date: 3/17/2006 9:40:22 PM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 3/15/2006 8:46:37 PM
Author:anchor31

Any tips on what to say or do? This is making me even more nervous...

A good night''s sleep should help, I guess!

*sigh*

ask him for his CC# and buy that stone from WF.

Hehehehe - that''s what I''m talkin'' about!!!

 

[anchor31]

Well, today it''s looking good!

He just told me that he won''t put money in the ring fund with his next paycheck (next Thursday?), but will finish paying off his credit card so that he''ll be able to keep piling up for the ring without having to worry about everything else. I have to admit I''m surprised, I thought it''d take longer!

I told him about the PS wire transfer discount, with which the ring would be 1465$US (~1685 CAD), as opposed to 1500$US (~1725CAD), and he said that''s why he wants to pay cash. He didn''t say anything about "somewhere else", so for now it''s looking good! I''m not sure how long it''ll take before he has the whole amount, but I''m hopeful it''ll be soon(ish). A month, maybe? We''ll see, I guess!

Talking about the PS discount, I asked Amber in her thread, but maybe someone else can answer me: Are the PS wire transfer discount and the WF wire transfer the same? If not, can they be combined? I''m sure J wouldn''t mind having an additional 2% off the stone...

Allycat (or any fellow Canadian) - What can you tell me about import taxes? I''ve heard about them, but don''t know what to expect. Is there any way to avoid them?

 

[allycat0303]

Hey Anchor,

The tax on the ring is about 25%-27% so that would be about $430 for you. Can you avoid them? Well you can try to sneak it over the border, although I wouldn't really suggest it. Yes we paid them, and for us it was 2700$ (approximately)

I wore my engagement ring on my finger (after proposal etc.) on a trip to the US, and was asked on the way back to produce recipt papers saying that a) It was purchased in Canada b) That it was imported from the US, and I had paid the necessary customs and duties. Unless your willing to never wear the ring on trips it can be annoying. So for $430 peace of mind forever, I think is a deal.

In addition, my friend recently tried to smuggle an e-ring over the border, and he only had the ring (no recipt anything) however, the customs agent on SUSPICION alone seized the ring AND the CAR! This is what I say, best not to mess with the federal government. They didn't have any proof that he had bought the ring in the US, but they suspected he had so they took the ring and the car. Also remember that if they suspect you of something, they are allowed to take your car apart...as in doors, etc., everything, and they don't put it back together if they find nothing (yes this has happened recently to a friend of mine)

It's pretty important to factor in the taxes when buying in the US, that's why buying there isn't this huge, amazing bargain. You will save some money, but not as much once everything is factored in. My stone was from WF because I really wanted a Leon Mege setting, so the whole process was just easier, however, if I wanted a simple solitaire, I would have bought it in Canada. It would have been nice to have a jeweler that could clean it, fix it, etc, without any problems. Any maintenece that has to be done on my ring is an increadible, terrible hassle, because I don't have a local jeweler.

Anyways some food for thought. As I said before, I think the US some beautiful diamonds. But some Canadian jewelers do too, even uncertified one's are beautiful, remember this girl?

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/apparently-diamond-specs-are-not-important-in-canada.40876/=

Now she was upset that she didn't have specs, but honestly, this stone needs no certificate because I'm sure you can see (and the other forum members agree) the gorgeous arrows on that diamond. Now 99.9 % of people in Quebec don't have a clue what a Hearts and Arrows etc, diamond is. And trust me I know, because when people see my ring, they say "that's really pretty!" nothing else. That's why I suggest not ruling out all Canadian and uncerted stones. It's just different in Montreal, but that's not to say you won't get a drop dead gorgeous stone here for your budget. So don't stress, either way you'll find something beautiful!

 

[anchor31]

Well, that certainly explains a lot! I called J and told him about it and he said: "I know. That why I want to keep looking."

Oh. I did know about it, but I never expected it to be so high...

So, we''re still looking! We haven''t completely ruled out the possibility of going with WF, but we''ll see what else we can find. I''m currently debating about telling him to wait for me to come back and then we good go shopping together again or not... I don''t think he''d mind, he did say: "I could wait for you, you''re the one who''s going to wear it." I dunno. I might ask him if he prefers to do this by himself or if he really doesn''t mind if I come along and choose.

Our adventure isn''t over yet, it seems! But I am becoming more and more convinced it''s going to happen this summer... Whenever I bring up the XBOX I''m going to buy him, he always ends up saying something about the summer, or some games not being out by the time we''ll be ready to buy (which will be after the proposal), that sort of thing. I can''t wait!

 

[E B]

What about that gorgeous .50ctw 3-stone you wrote about? Is that still a possibility? If it is, we''d love to see pictures!

 

[E B]

Also, I know Blue Nile isn't Whiteflash, but I post I'd ask anyway...they have a .ca website, and I found a couple stones with nice potential that might work. If, for some reason, the CA taxes still apply, ignore this post, but I figured it'd be worth a look.


.50 G, SI1 AGS0 Ideal $1488.16 CAD

.52 G, SI1 AGS0 Ideal $1651.80 CAD

.54 F, SI1 AGS0 Ideal $1658.13 CAD

4-Prong WG setting $260.17 CAD

I hope this info is of any help to you! Keep us updated!

ETA: I see there is still a tax and shipping fee, though I don't know if it's more, less or the same than normal. You might be able to go a bit smaller (.40-.49) or lower in color (H-I) to offset the cost of the tax. Just a thought!

Here's the website that estimates the tax/shipping by province:

Order Calculator

And some other possible choices?

.46 F, SI1 AGS0 Ideal $1070.73 CAD

.46, F SI1 AGS0 Ideal $1099.64 CAD

 

[anchor31]

Thanks Ebree! I really appreciate your help! Those are interesting possibilities, and I bookmarked them!

The only thing that sort of bothers me about the three-stone I found near my campus is that I''ve been wondering if the heart detailing in the setting would bother me in 30+ years from now... Maybe I''m just being too picky!

And there is the major inconvenience of it being here, 300 miles away from J. I guess that if it was the one and only for me we''d work something out, but for now we''ll keep looking.

 

[E B]

Date: 3/19/2006 5:22:14 PM
Author: anchor31
Thanks Ebree! I really appreciate your help! Those are interesting possibilities, and I bookmarked them!

The only thing that sort of bothers me about the three-stone I found near my campus is that I've been wondering if the heart detailing in the setting would bother me in 30+ years from now... Maybe I'm just being too picky!

And there is the major inconvenience of it being here, 300 miles away from J. I guess that if it was the one and only for me we'd work something out, but for now we'll keep looking.

Is the heart detailing pretty prominent? As in, are hearts swirling down the band? That'd bother me a bit, but I myself have the tiniest, sweetest heart detail in mine. Two tiny yellow gold hearts on each side of the basket...it's custom, and I requested it as I feel it sets my ring apart from all the other rings that look like mine, yet it isn't glaringly apparent. I adore my heart detailing.

I edited my post (to include the calculator, new stones) and just wanted to make sure you saw all of it. The stones I posted are all AGS0, and for SI1s, most of them look incredibly eye-clean!

 

[anchor31]

Yes, I''ve seen your edit. I knew about the 300$+ taxes fees with Blue Nile. Thanks!

The heart detailing isn''t prominent; it''s on both sides of the trellis, at the bottom. I actually think it''s quite pretty, I''ve just been wondering if I''d look at it in 30+ years and think it''s obvious I picked it out when I was 20!