Honeymoon or house?

[Elmorton]

House and a mini-moon! DH and I were just talking yesterday about how our honeymoon was the biggest waste of money ever. I wish we would have taken it six months after our wedding (if at all). I literally slept through most of the honeymoon - I was so exhausted. And the whole time, I wanted to be at home, getting my name changed, getting all of our new things arranged, finding a new job (we''d just moved). I couldn''t settle or relax, which meant it was a lot of money wasted. I think all the time what we could have done with that money!

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 4/9/2008 6:42:02 PM
Author: onvacation
Sorry Zoe, I don''t have an answer to your question, but can I ask a related question of my own? Why do people insist on honeymoons? When you''re first married, I would think a new house to become settled into is an adventure enough. Why not take a well-deserved rest in your new house, learn your way around it, and play newlyweds in the house?

(Of course, this would only pertain to couples who are getting a new house, or are moving in together only after the wedding. For those who have been living together for a while, I definitely understand the need for a honeymoon, to shake things up a little.)

If things were up to me, I would prefer to come back home straight away after the wedding, spend a week in bed lounging with FI. Try out the bed.

Movies and video games. Pizza. Fancy nights out. The comfort of home. Then when you''re well used your wedded life, a year or two later, go for the fancy once-in-a-lifetime trip. I think I''d savor time away with my then-DH much more then than when I''m all hyped up and tired from the wedding.

Maybe I''m not seeing the romance of a honeymoon. Would someone please shake some sense into this very disillusioned girl? *sigh.* If this all sounds like the nonsense of someone who has no clue, please let me know, too!

P.S. - Zoe, how''d the fitting go?

Hi Onvacation!

I saw this earlier but I haven''t had time to reply. My FI and I met 4.5 years ago and have been together ever since. We lived together on a part-time basis until we bought our condo 2.5 years ago. We won''t have that new feeling of finally moving in together after our wedding, so a vacation is definitely something we''d look forward to -- for the change of scenery, among other things. As for seeing the romance of a honeymoon, I''m not sure things will feel much different than a regular vacation. I''ve heard that your honeymoon just feels different but I''m not sure why. I guess I''ll find out, huh?

Thanks for asking about the fitting. It went fine I guess, although I''d still rather not wear my dress. I like it but I definitely don''t feel like myself in it. A wedding gown isn''t exactly my comfort zone. It doesn''t help that my mom went with me (I had asked her to come) and when I asked her how I looked, she said, "you look pretty. You just can''t gain an ounce. Not one. Get to the gym." Leave it to my mom to give me a back handed compliment. If you''ve read any of my previous posts regarding my experience dress shopping, you''ll know I''m kind of hugely self conscious about certain things. I''d love it if my mom could give me a compliment and not do a once over as she''s doing it.

But anyway, the seamstress is going to take some of the left over fabric she has after hemming the dress and she''s going to make lace straps. I think the straps will be about 1 1/4" wide. I also will have a shawl type of thing (very lightweight fabric) to use if I want but THAT didn''t go over well with my mom.

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 4/10/2008 1:39:01 PM
Author: AmyBride
I can understand the dilemma. Is there a way to meet somewhere in the middle? Maybe a shorter/less expensive HM but use the savings for a house downpayment. I think a HM is very important, but financial goals (such as a downpayment) are important too.

Hi Amy,

We had originally planned a honeymoon to Portugal, but we changed our minds when we saw how expensive our trip would be. We decided to save money and drive to Quebec City instead (it''s about a 6 hour drive from where our wedding will be). So our new honeymoon destination is our "somewhere in the middle."

 

[violet02]

Date: 4/10/2008 8:17:43 PM
Author: Elmorton
House and a mini-moon! DH and I were just talking yesterday about how our honeymoon was the biggest waste of money ever. I wish we would have taken it six months after our wedding (if at all). I literally slept through most of the honeymoon - I was so exhausted. And the whole time, I wanted to be at home, getting my name changed, getting all of our new things arranged, finding a new job (we''d just moved). I couldn''t settle or relax, which meant it was a lot of money wasted. I think all the time what we could have done with that money!

Yeah I was starting to feel that way about all of the money going into the wedding but I have to splurge on one of these things!

Be able to buy a house would be amazing though. Really amazing.

 

[swingirl]

Take a short honeymoon, spend half the money, GET PREGNANT on your honeymoon and more forward with the house and kids plan!

 

[zoebartlett]

Date: 4/10/2008 8:44:03 PM
Author: swingirl
Take a short honeymoon, spend half the money, GET PREGNANT on your honeymoon and more forward with the house and kids plan!

Now THAT''S a plan!

We may just work on that!

 

[AmberGretchen]

Zoe - I''m really glad to hear you decided to take the honeymoon. We went away right after our wedding to a nearby destination for a minimoon - wine tasting, couples massage, really good food. It was only 4 days but I don''t think I''ve ever been so blissfully happy or so relaxed in my entire life, and DH felt the same. It was totally a worthwhile thing to do and I''ve never regretted it for a moment.

Of course, we also had a "real" honeymoon a couple of months later where we went to England for a little over 2 weeks, and that was a blast too, but I never could have appreciated it properly if we''d gone right after the wedding. And if I had to go back and choose only one, it would definitely be the minimoon - it was AMAZING.

I''m sure you and your FI will have the same experience in QC