How did you and your SO decide to be BF/GF?

[madelise]

Hello ladies!

How did you and your BF decide to "go steady"? I've always wondered how these things happen, and what's the norm. Back in HS, guys would ask a girl to "get with" them, and that was it: you're GF and BF. Then I knew some guys would "propose" to be in a committed relationship-- all romantic and the works. I once had a boyfriend "propose" to me in a large newspaper that he knew My coworkers and I read daily. It had my full name, and "will you be my girlfriend?" and his full name. That came nearly 6 months after we had been dating! I mean, really, what did it change? We were only dating each other anyway?

But like, what? After 5 dates, you're BF&GF? 10? After a proposal? I don't get it

What's the usual thing to do in your social group? How did you and your FFs come to that BF/GF titled conclusion? Are there rules to this practice?

I remember when SO and I first dated, we were both so confused about this practice.. Haha.

 

[audball]

Haha! Andrew and I have a pretty cute story, but before I get to that, I have to say that I agree with you!

Back in high school it seemed more okay to be, Will you be my BF? Will you be my GF? kind of thing. Before Andrew, it had been over 6 years since I'd been in that early state of a relationship part where the lines are unclear. I'm very curious to see if anybody else has some insight about what is appropriate for people who are in their 20s or older. I really don't know where the line is drawn from dating to exclusivity.

Anyway, as for Andrew and I, we had started talking in April last year and it wasn't until May that we admitted that we both really like each other. I was in the midst of a bad breakup (as you are all aware) that didn't finalize until mid June. After S and I were finally separately and moved into our own places, Andrew and I started spending a lot of time together in person. We hadn't spent a lick of time together in person before this as all of our communications were online (though we did know each other in person...we just never saw each other unless it was in a group setting). After a few weeks of spending nearly every day together, I kissed him. He was so nervous I could feel the tension, but it started there. We went on our first official date a few weeks later (we had some work and school and test conflicts that prevented it being sooner). He showed up to pick me up for our first official date with beautiful flowers. As I was putting them into a vase before leaving, he told me that the girl at the flower shop told him they were a beautiful choice and asked who they were for. He told me that he told her they were for his girlfriend and asked me if that was okay. I said of course it was, and that was that. We've been official every since and I love him a little bit more every single day.

It's funny that we call our anniversary the day of our first date (July 14th) when in fact we started talking in a manor of early dating in late April, openly admitted we liked each other in late May, started spending all of our time together and shared our first kiss in June, not to have our first official date or anniversary fall until July. We're odd birds.

 

[Ravenne]

I was always very confused about the etiquette until I got my first boyfriend in college. And then the rest all happened the same way so I never thought much of it.

SO had been trying to get me to notice him for a while... And I feel bad about that now because I seriously thought he was a great guy, but I thought he was just being nice because... he's a nice guy. LOL. I wouldn't allow myself to believe that he would actually be interested in me, even though I really did have a crush on him. Looking back though.. geez, I was blind. We met at a campus church group. I'd already been going for 2 years (junior), he was an incoming freshman and he kinda melted into the group of friends I was in. After a while we were talking to each other one on one more than in a group setting.. He was walking me back to my dorm after every church night, refilling my drinks for me at the weekly church dinners, gave me his jacket when we were walking outside even though I already had one on (I was still cold, too stubborn to admit it, and he could tell), etc. Typical courtship. It even got to the point where we were hanging out all the time, though not going on dates. Just meeting up around campus. He was the person I called when I walked out of my Social Psych test knowing I'd failed it (a first for me. And I'd studied for days! I was panicking and he was able to keep me from hyperventilating). Finally I had to meet him to return a DVD I'd borrowed (Sweeney Todd!!!), and we ended up talking for 2 hours before he kissed me and said, and I quote "And just so you don't think I'm leading you on, will you be my girlfriend?" All of that was said in one breath, really fast and he couldn't meet my eye until I'd said yes. After that he picked me up and spun me around until I was dizzy.

ROFL! So I guess I always thought the exclusive bf/gf relationship thing had a "proposal" of sorts. Not necessarily a fancy planned proposal, but at least a question and answer. And that's how it was always done in my high school too.

 

[pandabee]

Such cute stories!!! I will share my story but I'll preface it saying it's very long and I have to tell the whole story of how we met

So, 2 years ago I was dealing with the bad fallout with a guy I was kinda dating who is also in school with us. In February I invited a friend to go to my sorority date party with me but turns out he thought we could be more than that, even though I told him I was inviting him on the premise as friends and he was mostly up to speed about my other messy dating situation. We ended up leaving the date party and heading to another bar downtown where some of our other classmates were and long story short, I ended up hooking up with now-DBF (had met him through a friend a couple months prior). Unfortunately, I didn't think much of it other than a way to get some frustration out and have some fun but poor guy kept trying to talk to me and hang out. I was (very unfortunately) still hung up on the first guy so that is why I was hesitant to let myself get close to someone else until I thought I had figured myself out.

Finally we went out on a date in May...but it was the worst first date ever. We were going to watch a movie but ended up looking up the wrong times so we walked over to Target instead and he bought I am Legend and we watched that at his place. Such a depressing movie. Anyways, we end up hanging out more than summer anyways, mostly because there wasn't a whole lot else to do, and finally the walls broke down and I ended up developing legit feelings for this kid!! We started school the end of September and by then we were pretty much dating, we were exclusive, but no one really knew outside of our close friends. However, word travels fast in our class so people eventually found out soon that we were dating. By the end of October or November, I asked him if he was ever going to ask me to officially be his girlfriend and he laughed at me and said that people only did that in high school. But he admitted that he would introduce me as his girlfriend so I left it at that. I also arbitrarily chose an anniversary date for us because everything kinda just happened gradually lol.

Since he is my first serious boyfriend, I had no idea how it was supposed to work! Especially since our timeline was so backwards haha. So for us, we just let things naturally progress on their own, and we had the most ups and downs in the beginning that we worked through to build our relationship off of. According to him, people our age (early 20s) don't ask each other to be official anymore, but I have a suspicion that's just him. But that's okay, I love him and his hard exterior all the same!

 

[sonnyjane]

Ha funny! I dunno we just... were! I thought he was going to be a one-night-stand, so I didn't put much thought into it. I went home with home after a night at the bar and well, we just kept seeing each other! We have been together almost 7 years, married for 3.5. We never had the bf/gf talk!! Guess it was just understood.

 

[audball]

Cute stories ladies!

 

[madelise]

Haha! Andrew and I have a pretty cute story, but before I get to that, I have to say that I agree with you!

Back in high school it seemed more okay to be, Will you be my BF? Will you be my GF? kind of thing. Before Andrew, it had been over 6 years since I'd been in that early state of a relationship part where the lines are unclear. I'm very curious to see if anybody else has some insight about what is appropriate for people who are in their 20s or older. I really don't know where the line is drawn from dating to exclusivity.

Anyway, as for Andrew and I, we had started talking in April last year and it wasn't until May that we admitted that we both really like each other. I was in the midst of a bad breakup (as you are all aware) that didn't finalize until mid June. After S and I were finally separately and moved into our own places, Andrew and I started spending a lot of time together in person. We hadn't spent a lick of time together in person before this as all of our communications were online (though we did know each other in person...we just never saw each other unless it was in a group setting). After a few weeks of spending nearly every day together, I kissed him. He was so nervous I could feel the tension, but it started there. We went on our first official date a few weeks later (we had some work and school and test conflicts that prevented it being sooner). He showed up to pick me up for our first official date with beautiful flowers. As I was putting them into a vase before leaving, he told me that the girl at the flower shop told him they were a beautiful choice and asked who they were for. He told me that he told her they were for his girlfriend and asked me if that was okay. I said of course it was, and that was that. We've been official every since and I love him a little bit more every single day.

It's funny that we call our anniversary the day of our first date (July 14th) when in fact we started talking in a manor of early dating in late April, openly admitted we liked each other in late May, started spending all of our time together and shared our first kiss in June, not to have our first official date or anniversary fall until July. We're odd birds.

Haha, seriously! I have no idea how people get into that conversation? It's so awkward for me. See, if anyone would ask me, "is that your boyfriend?", I'd say, "oh no, I'm just dating him" or "no, I've just been talking to him". Or if it's been longer than a month or two, "oh, not really, I've just been dating him for __ months". I just don't really "get" the whole.. threshold of where you become officially a girlfriend. And the conversation is awkward. The "proposal" is awkward. LOL!

Our "anniversary" is the day he didn't ASK me to be his girlfriend but the day he TOLD ME he wanted me to be. He had taken me on a trip for 3 days to Las Vegas since he knew I had been super stressed out from work (I was doing ~53 hour work weeks), my crazy mother, breaking up with my ex, and school. I had only known him for a month, and everyone thought I was crazy for going out of state with someone I barely knew. The Geminid meteor shower's peak was one of those nights, and he knew what a shootingstar-obsessor I am. He drove me out about an hour away, into the desert, so I could watch the stars in complete darkness. It literally looked like the sky was raining stars. It was SO beautiful. I had been so excited about making a wish on my first shooting star of the night, and he started to get really awkward. He kept saying how much he hoped his wish would come true. I didn't bite his bait. I don't think I cared. Plus, I don't believe in sharing wishes, as it'd nullify any chance of it being granted! But he persisted on making stupid comments about his wish, and asked why I wasn't curious to what his wish was. He got sick of me not taking his bait (I HATE CHEESY THINGS, I totally roll my eyes), and basically told me that he wanted to wish upon a shooting star that I'd be his girlfriend! HAH! I said no and kept telling him he was being lame. LOL! I'm horrible, I know!

But 2+ years later, here we are! And you know it's never official 'til it's on Facebook... so.. haha.

 

[madelise]

I was always very confused about the etiquette until I got my first boyfriend in college. And then the rest all happened the same way so I never thought much of it.

SO had been trying to get me to notice him for a while... And I feel bad about that now because I seriously thought he was a great guy, but I thought he was just being nice because... he's a nice guy. LOL. I wouldn't allow myself to believe that he would actually be interested in me, even though I really did have a crush on him. Looking back though.. geez, I was blind. We met at a campus church group. I'd already been going for 2 years (junior), he was an incoming freshman and he kinda melted into the group of friends I was in. After a while we were talking to each other one on one more than in a group setting.. He was walking me back to my dorm after every church night, refilling my drinks for me at the weekly church dinners, gave me his jacket when we were walking outside even though I already had one on (I was still cold, too stubborn to admit it, and he could tell), etc. Typical courtship. It even got to the point where we were hanging out all the time, though not going on dates. Just meeting up around campus. He was the person I called when I walked out of my Social Psych test knowing I'd failed it (a first for me. And I'd studied for days! I was panicking and he was able to keep me from hyperventilating). Finally I had to meet him to return a DVD I'd borrowed (Sweeney Todd!!!), and we ended up talking for 2 hours before he kissed me and said, and I quote "And just so you don't think I'm leading you on, will you be my girlfriend?" All of that was said in one breath, really fast and he couldn't meet my eye until I'd said yes. After that he picked me up and spun me around until I was dizzy.

ROFL! So I guess I always thought the exclusive bf/gf relationship thing had a "proposal" of sorts. Not necessarily a fancy planned proposal, but at least a question and answer. And that's how it was always done in my high school too.

Lol, I'm glad these answers are confirming my HS wasn't that "off". I totally was thinking it was just a "my high school" thing.

Spinning you around? That's so cute. Totally movie-like!

 

[madelise]

Such cute stories!!! I will share my story but I'll preface it saying it's very long and I have to tell the whole story of how we met

So, 2 years ago I was dealing with the bad fallout with a guy I was kinda dating who is also in school with us. In February I invited a friend to go to my sorority date party with me but turns out he thought we could be more than that, even though I told him I was inviting him on the premise as friends and he was mostly up to speed about my other messy dating situation. We ended up leaving the date party and heading to another bar downtown where some of our other classmates were and long story short, I ended up hooking up with now-DBF (had met him through a friend a couple months prior). Unfortunately, I didn't think much of it other than a way to get some frustration out and have some fun but poor guy kept trying to talk to me and hang out. I was (very unfortunately) still hung up on the first guy so that is why I was hesitant to let myself get close to someone else until I thought I had figured myself out.

Finally we went out on a date in May...but it was the worst first date ever. We were going to watch a movie but ended up looking up the wrong times so we walked over to Target instead and he bought I am Legend and we watched that at his place. Such a depressing movie. Anyways, we end up hanging out more than summer anyways, mostly because there wasn't a whole lot else to do, and finally the walls broke down and I ended up developing legit feelings for this kid!! We started school the end of September and by then we were pretty much dating, we were exclusive, but no one really knew outside of our close friends. However, word travels fast in our class so people eventually found out soon that we were dating. By the end of October or November, I asked him if he was ever going to ask me to officially be his girlfriend and he laughed at me and said that people only did that in high school. But he admitted that he would introduce me as his girlfriend so I left it at that. I also arbitrarily chose an anniversary date for us because everything kinda just happened gradually lol.

Since he is my first serious boyfriend, I had no idea how it was supposed to work! Especially since our timeline was so backwards haha. So for us, we just let things naturally progress on their own, and we had the most ups and downs in the beginning that we worked through to build our relationship off of. According to him, people our age (early 20s) don't ask each other to be official anymore, but I have a suspicion that's just him. But that's okay, I love him and his hard exterior all the same!

OMG I've had my share of "worst dates ever" with my SO. I don't think we even had a "good date" until our 2nd or 3rd month! LOL! We've also missed movies and reservations.. and major food poisoning

 

[madelise]

Ha funny! I dunno we just... were! I thought he was going to be a one-night-stand, so I didn't put much thought into it. I went home with home after a night at the bar and well, we just kept seeing each other! We have been together almost 7 years, married for 3.5. We never had the bf/gf talk!! Guess it was just understood.

I thought my SO was just going to be another notch on my belt, too I did NOT take him seriously at all! Especially since I had just gotten out of a longer relationship with someone older! We ended up just hanging out almost everyday, as well! We had both been dating other people when we met, and we never even "broke it off" with the others--- we hung out with each other so much that we never had any time for the others! lol!


my friend had said, "I don't think you understand the concept of a one-night-stand..."

 

[madelise]

Cute stories ladies!

Yes! Thanks for sharing, ladies. And offering your own personal experiences with the "bf/gf" issue.

This led me to another topic, but I think I'll post it next week if I remember! I hope more people share their experiences

 

[wakingdreams53]

I just started seeing someone, but we're both recently getting out of long-term relationships and aren't looking to be bf/gf for a while, but it's a very cute time! Before he met my little sister, he asked how he's been introduced, to which I replied, "You're *his name*. My friend *his name,* and if there's something more, I'm not even aware of it! "

I'll let y'all know if we get to the "are you my gf/bf?" bit lol.

 

[Sun-Shine]

When we started dating it was pretty formal. He picked me up, took me on nice dates, dropped me off at home, no funny business... All around me my friends were complaining about the "losers" they were dating and I thought, "I'm going to avoid that because no guy who just wants a hook-up will put up with this." It was either fate, or us kicking it old-school, because after about a month of dating he took me to a restaurant with a city view and at sunset he said "I have the best time with you, and I want to keep having fun with you.... And only you." I said, "me too." And that was that. I was THRILLED.... still am

 

[Magpie09]

We were just lazing on the couch about 2 months into seeing each other and out of the blue BF asked me to be his GF. For us it just meant that we would see each other exclusively from that point. I think it was 4 months in when we became 'official' on FB.

 

[pandabee]

Ha funny! I dunno we just... were! I thought he was going to be a one-night-stand, so I didn't put much thought into it. I went home with home after a night at the bar and well, we just kept seeing each other! We have been together almost 7 years, married for 3.5. We never had the bf/gf talk!! Guess it was just understood.

I thought my SO was just going to be another notch on my belt, too I did NOT take him seriously at all! Especially since I had just gotten out of a longer relationship with someone older! We ended up just hanging out almost everyday, as well! We had both been dating other people when we met, and we never even "broke it off" with the others--- we hung out with each other so much that we never had any time for the others! lol!

my friend had said, "I don't think you understand the concept of a one-night-stand..."

haha oh good I am so glad I'm not the only one!!! Congrats on almost 7 sonnyjane, I hope it goes as well for me and DBF as well!

 

[pandabee]

Haha, seriously! I have no idea how people get into that conversation? It's so awkward for me. See, if anyone would ask me, "is that your boyfriend?", I'd say, "oh no, I'm just dating him" or "no, I've just been talking to him". Or if it's been longer than a month or two, "oh, not really, I've just been dating him for __ months". I just don't really "get" the whole.. threshold of where you become officially a girlfriend. And the conversation is awkward. The "proposal" is awkward. LOL!

Our "anniversary" is the day he didn't ASK me to be his girlfriend but the day he TOLD ME he wanted me to be. He had taken me on a trip for 3 days to Las Vegas since he knew I had been super stressed out from work (I was doing ~53 hour work weeks), my crazy mother, breaking up with my ex, and school. I had only known him for a month, and everyone thought I was crazy for going out of state with someone I barely knew. The Geminid meteor shower's peak was one of those nights, and he knew what a shootingstar-obsessor I am. He drove me out about an hour away, into the desert, so I could watch the stars in complete darkness. It literally looked like the sky was raining stars. It was SO beautiful. I had been so excited about making a wish on my first shooting star of the night, and he started to get really awkward. He kept saying how much he hoped his wish would come true. I didn't bite his bait. I don't think I cared. Plus, I don't believe in sharing wishes, as it'd nullify any chance of it being granted! But he persisted on making stupid comments about his wish, and asked why I wasn't curious to what his wish was. He got sick of me not taking his bait (I HATE CHEESY THINGS, I totally roll my eyes), and basically told me that he wanted to wish upon a shooting star that I'd be his girlfriend! HAH! I said no and kept telling him he was being lame. LOL! I'm horrible, I know!

But 2+ years later, here we are! And you know it's never official 'til it's on Facebook... so.. haha.

Madelise your story is seriously so funny as well. I can totally see myself being sarcastic like that with DBF if he had tried to ask me like that. I am a total space geek as well but unfortunately have never seen anything that cool!!!! One of these days before I die. And seriously Facebook official...that took us forever to get to!!! I didn't put it on my FB til like June or July after we "officially" started dating, then it took him until December (so a good year after we were official) to put it on his as well lol. It bugged me so much at the time but now I don't know why I felt it was so important. Also, fortunately food poisoning hasn't happened yet but that's not to say it can't be ruled out in the future LOL.

 

[audball]

Such cute stories ladies!

That led me to remember a fail from our first date. Andrew picked this amazing non-chain Italian restaurant that was DELICIOUS so no fails there

I wanted to see Cars 2, I loved the first one and I didn't care that it was a kid movie! He was totally up for it and actually took it a step further. He set the whole thing up with having had us watch the first one a few days in advance, sort of a pre-date. He ordered Chinese (our favorite dish to share) and we sort of have a thing with this Chinese place and what we order. When we were just talking before we admitted liking each other and/or dating, he went there on my recommendation and ordered my favorite. HE LOVED IT. And best yet, the fortune he got, which we still have saved, read "Romance awaits you." So he surprised me with bringing that over with a copy of Cars 1 that he bought. It was such a cute pre-date night. Then real date night 2 days later, we had this amazing dinner and were off to see the second one...yeah...we didn't even think twice about it being the night of the premier for Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part II. Face palm. We get there at 9ish, the place is SOOO crowded and they have like nothing playing (including Cars 2). We ended up seeing something, but not what we planned, and the place was packed. Gave us an excuse to cuddle super close, but epic fail on our part.

 

[princesss]

Cute stories!

Madelise, my high school was similar. Guys asked you to go out with them, and then you were BF/GF. (The terminology always confused my mom - "Going out where?!?!" "No, mom! They're GOING OUT. Like, they're boyfriend and girlfriend." "Oh, so they're dating." "No! They're not going out on dates, they're GOING OUT." Ooooooh, high school.)

BF and I met on vacation, and we chatted over FB a lot when I got back. I had been really open with him when I met him for some reason (this is not normal for me with guys, normally I have walls about a thousand feet high), and I was freaking out about it and my friend JJ who was with me kept rolling her eyes and saying, "Yeah, because guys that are never going to talk to you again totally take time out from their vacation to comment on your Facebook wall. Mmm-hmm." We left and he and I kept chatting, and he went back home a week later and we must have talked 5/6 hours a day until he started going back to work. We talked every day for a month or so before we finally started video chatting.

So, our very first FaceTime "date", we were talking (we'd both admitted at this point to being interested in each other, but the distance made us hesitant and he got really badly burned by his ex when they were long distance) and the conversation kind of worked it's way towards whether or not we'd like to try being together.

"Princesss, I'd really like to go out with you."
"I'd really like to go out with you, too."
"I think I'm going to ask you out."
"Okay."
"Princesss, will you go out with me?"
"Yes."
"Well, that wasn't so scary!"

We went "FB official" a few weeks later (which is when he actually started to call me his girlfriend, haha - I guess nothing is official until it's on FB after all) when this really creepy guy kept hitting on me and I was trying to come up with a way to scare them off. Plus...I just kind of wanted to make it officially official, haha.

A while ago he mentioned that he wanted our anniversary to be the day we met, not the day we actually decided to be together, since that's when he first saw me. So going with that date, we've been together for 6 months now.

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

here's my contribution

i was just getting out of another failed short relationship, and was in the midst of many "1st dates" as my SIL (brothers wife), always tells me its a numbers game haha. I had signed up on match.com...and literally the moment i thought it was really "hokey", i got an email from my current beau. I was on my way out with friends but decided he was cute, immediately told him to add me on fb and talk that way. well we "chatted" that entire night, and quickly moved to the phone. We talked literally for hours every single night until our first date which we planned a week later. Our first date was brunch on a hot thursday afternoon as i work 2nd shift...we cruised along to the beach after. From the moment of our first date we have seen each other every day since. Some odd parallels, he's lived in the same town as me, and we have lived less than 2 miles apart our entire life. We went to the same high school, but he was 6 years ahead of me haha. Both of our work are less than one mile from each other...our houses in our adult life were 1.2 miles away. I would have never crossed paths if it weren't for match.com and i am forever grateful for that. LOL He truly is my soulmate.

To the question at hand...i guess it was more or less decided when i got a FB relationship request (OHHH technology at its finest). Only fitting since we met online i guess. We started "officially" dating 2 weeks after we met. We have been living together 4 months and together 9 months. I have never moved in with a bf and he has never with a gf...i guess when you know, you know

 

[star sparkle]

Aww, cute stories ladies!!

For FF and I, it was kinda funny. We went on a first date, which was actually two separate dates in the same day (lunch date, and then we decided to out for drinks and dessert later that same night). He was leaving for two weeks the day after our first date, hence why when it went smashingly well at lunch we decided we wanted to see each other again before his trip. Then I gave him a ride to the airport the next morning, and he called me every single day while he was gone and we talked SO MUCH and about everything.

When he finally got back I picked him up from the airportwas so excited/nervous to see him again, but everything was great! Then I was telling him this funny story about a guy from work who was borderline stalkerish with me (not actually a stalker, but had a huge crush on me and followed me around quite a bit), and he was like "Why don't you just tell him you have a boyfriend so he'll leave you alone?" I said because as far as I knew I didn't actually HAVE a boyfriend, and he said "Well, I think we should change that right now." I think my heart melted then and there. Hahaha, I'm such a sap.

 

[audball]

I am loving these stories!!

Keep 'em coming ladies!

 

[RebeccaMUA]

I love all these stories!! It makes me think back to alll those years ago FI and I met

We dated fairly exclusively for a month (we both had one date with someone else when we first started dating as we had already made those commitments when we met, and we weren't "exclusive" any way so there wasn't a problem). It was funny because when I asked him how his "date" went he said "well, she isn't you". that's when I knew I didn't want to date anyone else either.

One month to the day of our very first date, he took me to the same place we had dinner on our first date and asked me to be his girlfriend by giving me a card with a sonnet he composed himself in Iambic pentameter ( he was a literature major in college and Shakespeare wrote in Iambic pentameter so it was super sweet) and then presented me with a diamond and pearl pendant (my birthstone is pearl) and told me that he loved me and if I would do him the honor of being his girlfriend.

It really felt like a scene out of a movie and we have been together ever since!

 

[pandabee]

I love all these stories!! It makes me think back to alll those years ago FI and I met

We dated fairly exclusively for a month (we both had one date with someone else when we first started dating as we had already made those commitments when we met, and we weren't "exclusive" any way so there wasn't a problem). It was funny because when I asked him how his "date" went he said "well, she isn't you". that's when I knew I didn't want to date anyone else either.

One month to the day of our very first date, he took me to the same place we had dinner on our first date and asked me to be his girlfriend by giving me a card with a sonnet he composed himself in Iambic pentameter ( he was a literature major in college and Shakespeare wrote in Iambic pentameter so it was super sweet) and then presented me with a diamond and pearl pendant (my birthstone is pearl) and told me that he loved me and if I would do him the honor of being his girlfriend.

It really felt like a scene out of a movie and we have been together ever since!

omg that is so cute!! and romantic!!

 

[MayFlowers]

I love all these stories!!

BF and I never really asked each other to be BF/GF. We both just kind of assumed that we were. There was never really any question that weren't BF/GF. I think I waited about 2-3 weeks after our first date to change my relationship status on FB. BF doesn't have a FB, but I would say that was about the time we started referring to each other as BF/GF. We still consider our anniversary to be the date of our first date because we never saw anyone else after that night.

 

[audball]

I love all these stories!!

BF and I never really asked each other to be BF/GF. We both just kind of assumed that we were. There was never really any question that weren't BF/GF. I think I waited about 2-3 weeks after our first date to change my relationship status on FB. BF doesn't have a FB, but I would say that was about the time we started referring to each other as BF/GF. We still consider our anniversary to be the date of our first date because we never saw anyone else after that night.

I'm finding this to be more of the case the older I get. It is just sort of happening that after so much time it's assumed you're exclusive and that's that.

 

[SomethingSinful]

Things were progressing well, we had meet up a few times, and we talked every night. The sex was great and I missed him terribly. As time went on, I missed him even more and we decided that we should live together. Now I grudgingly call him my BF when what I mean is partner.

 

[pandabee]

I love all these stories!!

BF and I never really asked each other to be BF/GF. We both just kind of assumed that we were. There was never really any question that weren't BF/GF. I think I waited about 2-3 weeks after our first date to change my relationship status on FB. BF doesn't have a FB, but I would say that was about the time we started referring to each other as BF/GF. We still consider our anniversary to be the date of our first date because we never saw anyone else after that night.

I think this was definitely my DBF's mindset. That since we were spending so much time with each other we obviously liked each other and there was no reason in "officially" asking.

 

[audball]

I love all these stories!!

BF and I never really asked each other to be BF/GF. We both just kind of assumed that we were. There was never really any question that weren't BF/GF. I think I waited about 2-3 weeks after our first date to change my relationship status on FB. BF doesn't have a FB, but I would say that was about the time we started referring to each other as BF/GF. We still consider our anniversary to be the date of our first date because we never saw anyone else after that night.

I think this was definitely my DBF's mindset. That since we were spending so much time with each other we obviously liked each other and there was no reason in "officially" asking.

I really do think that this is the case for most ladies after high school. It just gets to a point where it's clear that neither of you are seeing anyone else anymore.

 

[madelise]

I love all these stories!!

BF and I never really asked each other to be BF/GF. We both just kind of assumed that we were. There was never really any question that weren't BF/GF. I think I waited about 2-3 weeks after our first date to change my relationship status on FB. BF doesn't have a FB, but I would say that was about the time we started referring to each other as BF/GF. We still consider our anniversary to be the date of our first date because we never saw anyone else after that night.

I'm finding this to be more of the case the older I get. It is just sort of happening that after so much time it's assumed you're exclusive and that's that.

I guess this is where my confusion with it all lies. How do you KNOW you're exclusive without having a talk about it? I mean, sure, I don't need a "proposal" of sorts, but I need that conversation, or I just consider it "dating". And whilst "dating", I feel it's a free for all. You're allowed to date as many people as you want, and he's allowed to date as many people as he wants. You don't have to check in with each other, and you aren't each others' emergency contacts. This might be a Los Angeles- thing, but I know MANY people who date around for long periods of time. One particular friend that pops up in my mind at this moment is in her late 30's and has, her whole life, always casually dated people for long periods of time. She'd date them for YEARS. But they're all casually dating, and free to date others, and they're intimate and romantic and all... but not exclusive. They don't call each other BF/GF. They don't meet each others' families. Kudos to her, and people like her. I tried that for a very short period of time and could barely keep up with the text messages between more than 1 person.

 

[pandabee]

I love all these stories!!

BF and I never really asked each other to be BF/GF. We both just kind of assumed that we were. There was never really any question that weren't BF/GF. I think I waited about 2-3 weeks after our first date to change my relationship status on FB. BF doesn't have a FB, but I would say that was about the time we started referring to each other as BF/GF. We still consider our anniversary to be the date of our first date because we never saw anyone else after that night.

I'm finding this to be more of the case the older I get. It is just sort of happening that after so much time it's assumed you're exclusive and that's that.

I guess this is where my confusion with it all lies. How do you KNOW you're exclusive without having a talk about it? I mean, sure, I don't need a "proposal" of sorts, but I need that conversation, or I just consider it "dating". And whilst "dating", I feel it's a free for all. You're allowed to date as many people as you want, and he's allowed to date as many people as he wants. You don't have to check in with each other, and you aren't each others' emergency contacts. This might be a Los Angeles- thing, but I know MANY people who date around for long periods of time. One particular friend that pops up in my mind at this moment is in her late 30's and has, her whole life, always casually dated people for long periods of time. She'd date them for YEARS. But they're all casually dating, and free to date others, and they're intimate and romantic and all... but not exclusive. They don't call each other BF/GF. They don't meet each others' families. Kudos to her, and people like her. I tried that for a very short period of time and could barely keep up with the text messages between more than 1 person.

wow, that's very interesting. maybe it partly depends on the region too? and you'd think that after a certain amount of time you would just know that you're exclusive...but apparently not so (to your friend and the boys she is with) if you don't actually have "the talk."