How much involvement would you ladies prefer?

[yanekie25]

I have to be in the minority too. I totally thought I wanted to be a part of the process, but the nature of my character (indecisive) made it impossible and simple made it more worse for BF, who doesn''t like this kind of stuff to begin with, so conversations about spread over dinner didn''t go over well. I became totally obsessed and totally annoying to him. I think it depends on the woman.

Now, he has setting choices and put him in touch with 2 very great jewelers, so I feel confident about him not getting ripped off. I am scared to death about what I will get. YES!!! Will I love it anyway. YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[psuheather]

I_like_Tiffany--I think that you really have to think about what type of personality your girlfiriend is (VERY IMPORTANT!) In a perfect world, I would love to be surprised and I know that my boyfriend would love to surprise me. But I just happen to be picky (sorry!) and I like what I like. My boyfriend knows this about me and would never have dreamed of not including me in the process because he knows that I''m not the kind of person that can be happy with whatever I get(oh no...that''s makes me sound very spoiled). Not to say that I don''t trust my boyfriend or think that he says good taste--I do. It''s just that soemthing that he might choose, while tasteful, might not be exactly what I would choose. And if that happened, I would forever walk past erings in jewelry stores and painfully sigh over what could have been...(a little dramatic??)

I should also add that, no matter what, my boyfriend''s proposal (when he does get around to proposing) would not have been that much if a surprise anyway since we talk about it all the time even before we went to look at rings.

 

[goldengirl]

Girls don''t necessarily want to shop together, so much as they want to LOVE the end result. Correct? And since (let''s face it) most of our men couldn''t pick out what we would LOVE, we solve the problem by going with them.

If a guy could pick a ring he thought she''d love and be open to the possibility of returning/exchanging it if it didn''t go over as well as expected, I''d be excited by the propect of a surprise proposal. My thing is, it''s REALLY, REALLY hard for me to say a gift didn''t rock my world. One time when I was like, 8 years old, my mom bought me a blouse that was frilly and lacy and embroidered with flowers and I thought it was the ugliest thing EVER. Knowing I''d never wear it and wanting to be practical, when she asked if I liked it I said very gently, "It''s pretty, but I don''t really think it''s my style." Well, we returned the blouse and I still, TO THIS DAY, hear about what a NIGHTMARE it is to buy clothes for me because I NEVER like ANYTHING she picks out.

That was the only item I ever criticized. It was a harsh lesson but I learned that if I didn''t really like something, to just say thanks and send it off to Goodwill. So for me, it''s much less stressful to pick it out together than to worry about how I''ll say something if it''s not really what I wanted...and honestly, I probably wouldn''t, and instead would just quietly wish it had been like I''d hoped.

So if he could pick it out and have it just like what I wanted....great! Otherwise, yes, I''d rather be involved.