I need a lecture - help

[ephemery1]

First of all, I don''t think you ever have to apologize for revealing your honest feelings about something! If someone dared to tell you that your priorities were off, that would be them projecting THEIR priorities on to you... which would be completely unfair.

That said, I completely understand your feelings (despite not actually having my ring yet!)... and struggled with the size issue a bit myself when choosing a center stone. I liked both cushions and ovals, and felt guilty for leaning towards the oval because its spread was so much bigger! The truth is, you like what you like... for me, it was an aesthetic thing above all else... proportionally, I thought the shape and size of the larger oval looked better on my finger, and that was enough to settle it for me.

In your case, I do think your ring is stunning and certainly more eye-catching than 99% of the other rings you''d see on real (non-PS) people''s hands any given day. It is unique and classic all at once... and definitely a substantial size, comparatively speaking! Pairing a wedding band with it might give it that extra oomph to put you over the edge... but if not, keep in mind it''s not glued onto your finger for life. Wear it proudly and happily now... but somewhere down the line you can always consider something different/bigger, depending on what feels right to you at that time.

And when people say simple, I don''t think they''re always referring to the size... I usually focus more on the details and say something like "ooh very sparkly!" or "so white!" if it''s not a huge ring. But I''ve definitely been known to refer to large, well-cut stones in classic settings as "simple"... just meaning all my attention is drawn directly to the rock itself... definitely a compliment!

 

[Morticia]

Tracy, I am sure you are not alone. Honestly, I feel the same way about mine. I like it a lot. It''s pretty. It was my FI''s grandmother''s stone but I am just not in love with my ring. I wish I were but I''m not.

I got the setting I have b/c I want the stone to appear a little larger and it does, but now, I''m not even really liking my setting AT ALL. I really really want to change my e-ring but I know I have to wait.

(I totally wish I didn''t feel this way but I can''t help it.)

Oh and your ring? LOVE it. I think it''s beautiful, a great size, and looks lovely on you.

 

[froufrou]

i know what you mean about noticing other people''s rings! i do that all the time now, and i even have discussed it so much with one of my close guy friends that recently one of his friends who is a girl got engaged and he was all like "lets see the ring!!!" and then felt stupid because he''s a GUY haha!!!

if youre getting mediocre reactions from people in real life, if you just mention its a tiffanys, they will start automatically thinking its amazing. My boyfriend''s brother just got engaged and his fiancee showed me her ring, which is a .48 ct simple six prong and i didn''t think much of it til she said it was a Tiffanys and then i was like "ohh cool" and wanted to reixamine it again. but that was before i even saw pricescope. its funny though how in my head it made it go from okay looking to really neat. i kind of want to get my wedding band from there now just because ive always wanted to have that blue box

and seriously your ring looks huuuge.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 6/7/2006 2:51:23 PM
Author: Morticia
I''m not even really liking my setting AT ALL. I really really want to change my e-ring but I know I have to wait.

(I totally wish I didn''t feel this way but I can''t help it.)

Awwww. Morticia! I went back to peep at your ring and GEEZ it''s beautiful!! Maybe posting a pix here will help you view it more "objectively" & I''m sure save lots of pscopers time searching in out to peep like I did ...

Heirloom OEC in Ritini''s Endless Love setting! LOVELY!! Not to hijack ... but what aren''t you liking about it? Or is it that there''s something else you *like MORE*??

 

[Morticia]

Decode, the band width bugs me. It''s just too thin, in my opinion. The ring is so dainty and delicate and I''m 5''9", not super thin but not heavy-ish really either, but I just feel like it''s too delicate for me. It bugs me.

I''m crazy, I know.

I really like my ring and think it''s lovely but I like it more as a RHR and wish I had something different as my e-ring, a solitaire in platinum or a three stone in platinum. Something sturdier. I feel soooooooooooo bad wishing this but I do. Can''t help it.

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 6/7/2006 3:29:46 PM
Author: Morticia
The band width bugs me. It's just too thin, in my opinion. The ring is so dainty and delicate and I'm 5'9', not super thin but not heavy-ish really either, but I just feel like it's too delicate for me. I .... wish I had something different as my e-ring, a solitaire in platinum or a three stone in platinum. Something sturdier.

I'm 5'9 1/2 & I hear ya. I picked something "sturdy" but then the stone looks smaller in comparison!

Grass. Always. Greener!!

Wondering ... have you picked a w-band yet? Maybe you could "solve" some of your problem with the thin Ritini band by flanking the ring on either side with solid platinum (or white gold) bands ... that are "solitaire-band" like in feel and would "beef up" the overall look??? It might create a "solitare w/eternity band" effect without changing out your original (LOVELY) e-ring setting (quite yet)

At least until you scheme a future re-set or upgrade

.

 

[tracys126]

Hi SandiegoLady,

I read your post under the "My dress" link. I think you should post it as a new topic, because it''s urgent and people will most likely have good advice. They really came through for me here!

I am going to reread your post about your FI and his feelings about your ring and get back to you there.

Hang in there SDLADY! You are so sweet, and look amazing in your beautiful new dress

Big hug!

Tracy

 

[San Diego Bride]

please don''t feel bad, tracys. while i''ve never admitted it, i feel the same way about mine. i have a 0.9 carat round in a 6 prong cathedral setting. some days i think it''s classic and elegant and the size looks great on my finger. other days i think it''s plain and small and wish i had >1 carat. i don''t think it has anything to do with pricescope either. i think part of it for me has to do with having a previous engagement ring that i loved (different guy) so some days i think this one doesn''t measure up. and part of it has to do with the build-up (like tacori had mentioned). even though i''ve never been a really big fan of jewelry, i wanted to absolutely love my engagement ring and know that it was perfect every single time i looked at it. maybe that''s just unrealistic. i''m hoping that i''ll feel differently once i''m wearing my wedding band... and that you will too. the eternity band you have is a beautiful match and will add a lot of bling which may make you feel better.

oh, and i also know what you mean about other people not commenting on the ring. i want people to notice it, but they don''t. (sadly people noticed my last one). in the end i just tell myself that my ring, like my wedding, will always be much more important to me than to anyone else.

 

[Selkie]

I just looked at the pics of your set, and I think it is very elegant, and definitely appears sizeable on your hand. Yes, the style is simple, as in unadorned, but I don''t think *most* people are using the term in a negative way. To me, simple is FAR from an insult, and it definitely does not translate to "small." I am careful, though, to never just say "It''s so simple" when complimenting someone''s ring, I will also try to be specific about what I like-e.g., it''s classy, or delicate, or what have you.

 

[laila]

Awwww Tracy...I don''t have much wisdom to add to what others have already said, but I wanted to post anyways to give you some support. I have read your SMTR thread and from the time you first posted your pics, I have thought your ring was gorgeous, classic, and a perfect size for your hand!

It is truly beautiful! I don''t think it looks small at all. I can understand the disappointment at the reactions of other people - I think PSers get used to the great responses we get/read from the other diamond/jewelry fanatics here and we start to expect that the general public will notice our beautiful baubles and appreciate them or share in our excitement as much as everyone here does. Unfortunately for us, most people don''t have the same obsession. I love my friends, but they mainly could care less about other people''s e-rings or their own for that matter. I agree with what others have said that maybe focusing on what you, yourself, feel about your ring rather than what other people have said may help you sort out your feelings about it a bit more so you can decide if you truly love it and want to keep it, or if you need to go in a different direction. Also, I wanted to say that to me, simple is wonderful! Beautiful, classic, always in style, great taste - your ring is all of those things, IMO!

Please keep us updated with how you''re feeling, and please come back to discuss these things more if you ever need to! It sounds like almost everyone here can relate to your feelings in some way. Hugs...

 

[diamondfan]

I think you are just being honest and facing something that troubles you. We have all been there. (which is why people upgrade, more than once sometimes!) Honestly, this is a great place to toss it out, since we all understand and I think most fiances or dh''s might not...this is a good outlet!

 

[flopkins]

I''ve felt the same way!!! or, similar - as in oh, I wish I had got something just a leeeeeeeeeetle bit bigger... when DH and I went ring shopping initially, I was looking at rings MUCH smaller than what I have, and honestly, had I not found pricescope, I mighta been happy w/my ring... but man, there''s so much gorgeous bling on here... and even DH admitted, that now he''s more ''used'' to all the bling!!

and when I get those thoughts creeping in... I try to remember that DH told me my ering would be "just the first of many jewelry gifts"......

 

[blueroses]

I''m continuing the threadjack here, but Morticia, your amazing heirloom stone/Ritani has been one of my FAVORITES here on PS!!!!!!!!!! Have you been trying it on w/ different w-bands? Maybe you will feel differently with one or two bands (plain or sparke!) flanking the e-ring.....??

 

[Snooper]

No, you''re not a jerk at all!!! I too think that your ring looks HUGE on your hands! Had you not told me the specs I would have guessed 2 carats. I think a lot of women notice each others ring, and more so once they''re engaged. PS is not the norm. A lot of women I see have on average, .50-1.25. But then there are also a lot who have 2+ carats. No. VA is a wealthy area (Reston, Tysons, etc.) so it''s hard for me to get a good estimate. But vent away here. Your ring combo is one of my favs!!!

 

[ladykemma]

Date: 6/7/2006 12:08:10 PM
Author: Kaylyn

Date: 6/6/2006 10:55:30 PM
Author:tracys126
It's just that people respond to my ring like 'it's so simple'

Why in the world do people feel the need to say things like that? My cousin's dear wife (

) took one look at my ring and said, 'It's so tiny!'.

And that was all she said.

I think your ring is pretty. It's classic. And in 30 years when everyone who thinks your ring is 'simple' has a 'fancy' ring that goes out of style, yours will still look fantastic.

grrrr.

edited to add: when i have diamond shrinkage syndrome i clean and put all jewelry away for a week. when I pull them back out they're back to their normal size.

 

[tracys126]

Hi Ladykemma,

HA! You are right. I took it off yesterday because I was working around the house. When I put it back on, I was like, what a pretty ring!

 

[FireGoddess]

I too am sorry for the threadjack - Morticia, are you married yet? Cuz 2 words...wedding band!!! Ering won''t seem so thin anymore cuz it won''t be alone. That ring of yours is amazing.

Tracy, it''s so true - a day or so in the box...the stone inflates back to normal size.

 

[tracys126]

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to give you an update, just about one month after receiving my Lucida ering and matching band.

Well, thanks to you, I am feeling a lot better. I know it's a beautiful ring, but as you know, I had some issues around wishing it was a bit bigger etc.

Your comments ALL really helped me and provided me with a lot of insight. I did have sticker shock, thinking things like "for the price we paid, everyone should comment on how absolutely stunning it is." Now I am recovering from the sticker shock and trying not to focus on the ring, just the love and excitement that comes along with commiting to someone for the long haul.

As a person who comes from a relatively poor background, I had some serious expectations considering the high price of a Tiffany diamond!

And I wondered, do I like square really? Should I have gotten a round? And Tiffany? How the heck do I even feel about that?

Anyway, now I have settled into enjoying my ering and really, really loving the Lucida band.

But you know what's weird, I never was a diamond person before, and man am I already looking forward to my 3-stone anniversary ring! Ha!

Thanks so much everyone. You are wonderful.