If you have had a Bridezilla moment...

[marchswallowbird]

Date: 5/29/2009 10:48:39 PM
Author: brightlight
I''ve never had a bridezilla moment, but I''m about to go guestzilla on a bridezilla, groomzilla, and their families. I have never in my life encountered such selfish and self-centered people. The bride and groom come from WEALTHY families who are paying for all their wedding expenses and honeymoon, giving them a monetary gift, and still financially supporting them. These two pay for none of their own living expenses. NOTHING. Yet, they insist on turning this wedding into a fundraiser for themselves - in this economy of all times. The mothers are telling guests to give them checks (minimum of $300/person) instead of gifts from their registry. They''re skimping on things lthat would make a difference to the guests like the type, quantity, and quality of the food and the bar selection in order to save money, b/c the bride and groom get to keep the money from the wedding budget that they don''t spend. They sent out HUNDREDS of invitations to random acquaintances they knew wouldn''t come in order to receive more gifts. They also get a discount that''s applied to their wedding from the hotel if guests stay there, so they''re telling everyone to book under their names even though it''s much cheaper to book the rooms independent of the wedding. At the same time, they''re splurging on everything that has to do with themselves - jewelry, attire, spa treatments, etc. Did I mention the bride had four bridal showers and invited the same guests to all of them? Both families also insist on getting as much attention for their children''s weddings as possible, so they call up and harrass everyone about the wedding. They don''t understand why no one cares about this wedding, and no one is calling them asking about it. It really burns them that people don''t worship their children. Some people just have no sense of graciousness or respect for the work one does to earn money.

Thank you ... I needed to get that out of my system.

I would get them the cheapest thing on their registry as a gift.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Date: 5/29/2009 9:46:18 PM
Author: Hudson_Hawk
Nope, not yet. I''m cool as a cucumber.

I take this back...

 

[DearBuddha]

I think my only Bridezilla moment was having to tell my mother that we weren''t planning to invite her side of the family.

My father''s family is very, VERY large and we all lived in the same town while growing up; so I see my cousins quite frequently (we''re all within 2-4 years of age and pretty close; more like siblings than cousins). Conversely, I never see my mother''s side of the family; they''re spread out everywhere and all of my cousins are in their mid-late 40s, so naturally I''m not very close to them. So while I had most of my father''s family present, I had only a hand-full of my mother''s there.

And I wasn''t especially rude or mean or demanding about it. I told my mother our wedding budget, and in order to stay within that budget, DH and I were cutting corners when it came to guests. She wasn''t too hurt (thankfully), because she knows getting all her family together in one place is near impossible, and that it''s unrealistic for me to even remember who some of these people are in the first place (that''s how infrequently I''ve seen them-I have first cousins I couldn''t even name if I saw their faces!).

I think that was the only hurdle I really had to jump. I was super easy with my BMs. My only demand was that they stay sober through the ceremony

Then it was off to the party, and their sole responsibility there was just to keep up

 

[Rock Your Socks]

Date: 5/31/2009 10:10:45 AM
Author: Londongirl1

Date: 5/30/2009 6:10:20 AM
Author: Rock Your Socks
I come from Australia and My big sister by 10 years moved to scotland about 5 years ago. She comes back at least every 18months. But my most bridezilla moment was fairly recently when she told me that because all of her friends work during the week she would be going out the night before my wedding for drinks (without me). And considering i''m getting married at 11am in the morning and we have to be ready for the photographers by 9.30am, i said to her '' I don''t want you going out, getting drunk and stumbling home at 3 in the morning and going to my wedding with a hangover''. Well that went over well, let me tell you, she just said I''m a grown woman and i can do what i like.

I had to bite my tongue from then on and i just hope she doesn''t ruin my day somehow....

This isn''t a bridezilla moment - you''re just viewing the situation with some common sense. Whatever happens with your sister please do not allow it to ruin your big day

Thanks londongirl1, it just rubs me the wrong way you know. I just hope my day goes the way i have always imagined!

 

[lala2332]

hmmm....nothing yet.

well....unless you count trying to unask a BM. but i feel very justified. Maybe that is being a bridezilla...oh well.

 

[kama_s]

Date: 6/2/2009 6:03:48 PM
Author: Gypsy

Date: 6/2/2009 5:47:26 PM
Author: kama_s
Yeah, I had my first (and hopefully last) freak out yesterday at my father over my brother''s suit. We are having a hard time getting him something that looks good on him, for a decent price. My dad (and I fully agree) doesn''t want to spend upwards of 500$ (our only option as of right now) on a suit for him since he''ll outgrow it within the year. Ayways, I just absolutely flipped on my father because he just wasn''t understanding how difficult it has been getting my brother an outfit, and he kept making ridiculous suggestions (such as, jeans and a button down shirt or an Indian suit). I replied by saying that while I didn''t care about the family/bridal party matching, I didn''t want them to dress so differently that my wedding begins to look like a circus and have that documented forever in pictures I''m paying a fortune for.

Ahhhh, poor dad e-mailed me later saying that we should get my bro that 500$ suit because it''s a once-in-a-lifetime event.

Aww honey. That''s funny. Circus. Yeah. I can understand that though. ((HUGS)).

Can you get him slacks and a nice shirt and a tie? How old is he?

We had a couple of people show up wearing strange things. Like John''s cousin (the millionaire-- several times over) who showed up looking like a poor liberal arts teacher in tweed. And he was part of the processional. No tie. Shirt was rumpled. Coat was tweed with the elbow patches (in CA in September) and... twill pants (nice dockers). My mistake. I thought that since John had mentioned that he and the GM were wearing a tux and that we had decided that everyone else in the wedding party could just wear DARK SUITS, he would get the hint. Apparently not. His girlfriend? Looked STUNNING in a gold (like metallic gold) cocktail dress and heels, hair perfect, makeup perfect... the perfect guest. He looked like her lackey. And yes, he''s in MANY of the pictures... and I would have FLIPPED if I''d known before hand. But when he just showed up wearing that, I just put on my metal ''ignore.. la, la, la...'' button and dealt with it. One of John''s sisters showed up in a floor length evening gown. The other in a sun dress. They were baffled by the ''cocktail attire'' thing apparently.

Hmm, I really do want all the men in suits. I think if he''s the only one without a jacket, he might feel out of place. He just turned 18! This one''s going to be a doozy.

LOL @ John''s cousin! Some people can''t dress if their life depends on them. My graduate supervisor is filthy rich, and he wears these ghetto ties he gets from the ''2 for 20$'' shops! It''s hilarious, he''s this incredibly famous pediatrician and is on TV/Radio every other day!

 

[Clairitek]

Date: 6/2/2009 8:54:15 PM
Author: PilsnPinkysMom

Date: 5/31/2009 1:18:00 AM

Author: Clairitek

1. When one of my MOHS called me today and asked me just how much I liked her long hair. She was dying to cut it because it was blowing in her face, etc. I asked her to not chop more than 2 inches because I really love it long. We joked about how bridezilla-ish it was. Now that I type this all out I am feeling bad so maybe I will call her tomorrow and tell her to do whatever she feels will make her the most comfortable. That has been my mantra with everything bridesmaid related so far so perhaps I should keep up my laid back ''tude.

2. Not allowing one of the MOHS (different one from #1) to bring her on/off boyfriend. They are very very much on right now but we are having a very small wedding and I sorta put my foot down. He is invited to the post wedding bar crawl but not to the ceremony or dinner. Actually... put this moment down as a GROOMZILLA moment since my FI is really the one putting his foot down here.

Claritek, you''re too sweet. I love that your ''Zilla moments aren''t really that awful at all, and you still feel bad about them (well, the hair, at least!) You''re a very gracious, kind person. That radiates through in your posts, for sure!

Awww thanks PPM! I actually called the MOH referred to in #1 and told her that I wanted her to feel her most beautiful and COMFORTABLE on my wedding day and that while I really loved her gorgeous curly hair long I knew she was going bonkers dealing with it. I also realized that if she wasn''t comfortable it would show in our once-in-a-lifetime pictures together so I gave her my blessing to chop it to a pixie if that''s what she wanted to do. She had already made an appointment but said that she felt much better doing it knowing that I wouldn''t be shocked and upset the next time I saw her. She has the most amazing china doll, delicate features that look great even with a buzz cut.

 

[sunnyd]

Date: 5/30/2009 12:05:34 AM
Author: brightlight

Date: 5/29/2009 11:54:20 PM
Author: Brown.Eyed.Girl

Date: 5/29/2009 11:40:34 PM
Author: FrekeChild
Hmmm...Yeah. Although it was at a point where my dad and I were having a heated argument about something else, and everything just came pouring out about how crappy I felt about everything.


And uninviting people is probably a big bridezilla move too...

Well, having heard what happened to trigger all that though, I wouldn''t say it was a bridezilla moment. Just natural, considering all the crap you went through

Brightlight, that is ridiculous. I can''t believe how selfish they are - $300 minimum??? What do they think this is, some charity fundraiser or something? And the charity is themselves? Gah!

Actually, yes. That''s how they came up with the $300/person number - that''s how much you would pay per seat at a charity event dinner.

Oh dude. I would gift the money to an ACTUAL charity and send them a slip with "a donation has been made in your name..."

Take that, greedy!

 

[Clairitek]

Date: 5/31/2009 1:18:00 AM
Author: Clairitek
1. When one of my MOHS called me today and asked me just how much I liked her long hair. She was dying to cut it because it was blowing in her face, etc. I asked her to not chop more than 2 inches because I really love it long. We joked about how bridezilla-ish it was. Now that I type this all out I am feeling bad so maybe I will call her tomorrow and tell her to do whatever she feels will make her the most comfortable. That has been my mantra with everything bridesmaid related so far so perhaps I should keep up my laid back ''tude.

2. Not allowing one of the MOHS (different one from #1) to bring her on/off boyfriend. They are very very much on right now but we are having a very small wedding and I sorta put my foot down. He is invited to the post wedding bar crawl but not to the ceremony or dinner. Actually... put this moment down as a GROOMZILLA moment since my FI is really the one putting his foot down here.

So both of these are moot points now as MOH#1 has cut her hair and has an awesomely adorable short ''do right now! I love it. And I talked FI into inviting MOH#2 boyfriend who was really sweet this past weekend at my bachelorette party. I am so glad he is coming!

Tack on these to my list of b''zilla moments...
1) Telling my mother that we couldn''t set up the tables "italian feast" style for our post-wedding BBQ because I thought it would sort of be annoying for mingling.
2) Telling my mother to deal with the fact that the photographer would be in the salon with us while we are getting ready for my wedding.
3) Telling my mother to stop talking about the weather (forecasted to rain right now) because it was putting me in a bad mood.

OK. I think I need to lay off my mother now.

 

[doodle]

My bridezilla moment was with my best friend/ bridesmaid. I''ve been friends with this girl since I was 8 years old, made her a bridesmaid, and I even told her that because it would cause family drama, my sister was my maid of honor officially but that my friend was kind of an honorary MOH (to which she cried and we had one of those hallmark moments). Fast forward a bit, and this friend never helped me with a single wedding related item at all, is in all my wedding pictures with white triangles on her boobs above the neckline of her strapless dress looking like an idiot, and bailed out on my bridal shower like a week before the shower, even though she knew about it and RSVPed yes months in advance, because her boyfriend''s parents were coming into town, and she decided she had to be there for her boyfriend''s son''s bday celebration with his grandparents or it''d look bad. No mention of the kid''s feelings or anything like that, and her boyfriend told her repeatedly to go to the shower because it wasn''t like an actual birthday thing (the little boy''s birthday was the following week), and she had plenty of time to do both in the same day, but she told my friend that she just didn''t feel like being bothered by it. After the wedding, a friend told her that she should apologize, and she told the friend, "Yeah, but what if I don''t want to do that?" That pretty much ended me worrying about it right there, and we haven''t spoken since--my wedding was eight months ago today, so it''s been at least five months since we last talked. Maybe I''m being a brat, but I refuse to invest any more time and energy with a friend who can''t even be bothered to apologize.

 

[alli_esq]

Does it make me a bridezilla that I am furious at FI because I asked him for his friends' addresses 5 weeks ago and he still hasn't gotten more than one of them?

Or that I'm even angrier that he never makes himself available to meet with the officiant I want to meet?

(these are the only two things I've asked of him thus far, aside from showing up at the engagement photo session...)

 

[cocolaw]

i lost it when, after meeting with 4 vendors in 2 days, my mom wouldn''t let me get a word in. the 3 of us would sit down to discuss and i kept hearing "daughter wants this, likes this, doesn''t want this." i hate being spoken for, especially when i am RIGHT THERE. so finally when it went on and on with the florist, i mouthed to my mom "shut-up"...that was my bridezilla moment.

 

[zipzapgirl]

This was a joint bridezilla/groomzilla moment.
For the rehearsal we tried to arrange transportation for the bridal party to get to the villa, as it would have been a $25+ cab ride and some people had rental cars. My brother took a long nap and wasn''t even showered when the cab arrived which he was meant to share with some other family members. So they left him. And we had to find him another ride among all of the other stress!! He ended up crouching in the back of a station wagon which was carrying 5 other adults

Writing it now it doesn''t seem like such a big deal, but it was really the straw that broke the camel''s back. The cab drivers kept getting lost and people kept calling us to tell us they were lost--and that the drivers didn''t speak english. Then a bridesmaid tries to rearrange the transport for her husband 5 minutes before we leave... It was all a bit much. Groom yelled, I bitched, Mom got defensive and snappy. Brother was pissy. Ugghh.

We didn''t arrange *anyone''s* transportation for the wedding day and it went a lot better!

 

[tlh]

oh Italia... words cannot even describe what I am feeling what now. That would make me blow a gasket!

brightlight. Give them 300 pennies. I am serious. It will be funny. But maybe make an artwork out of it. HAHA... glue it down in the shape of a sun or something. Then you can innocently be like, oh, I thought there was a decimal in there. I was wondering why you wanted $3.00.

gypsy - I was stressed day of too. I did photos w/ my groom day of wedding, and when I put his booty on.. it totally calmed me down.

My friend IS a bridezilla. She asked me not to cut my hair 13 MONTHS before her wedding, I was growing it out intentionally to donate to charity after my wedding. My hair grows 1" a month. I went ahead and cut it anyway, but the rule was it had to fit in an updo on her wedding day. THEn she told me 13 months before my wedding not to get pregnant. She told her FSIL to stop trying to conceive. She didn''t want big people in her wedding party. (Note, my SIL was 8 1/2 mos pregnant day of, and apparantly this grossed her out.) She then asked a friend who she just congratulated on being pregnant, not to be in the party anymore because she didn''t want her boobs leaking in her pictures... adn she didn''t want a baby around at all the photos or the wedding...the list goes on and on...

My bridezilla moments - I went home for a bridal shower a couple weeks before the wedding, and found out my dress didn''t fit. It gave me a back butt... you know what I''m talking about. I FREAKED OUT and stopped eating... One day, I was on my way to get a desert treat for a hard core workout after being on a mostly liquid diet. (Dinner''s were 5 egg whites and half a slice of 45 calorie toast.) I sadly was only eating about 500-600 calories a day and working out 2+ hours cardio and another 90 minutes of weight training a day.... I broke down and started crying on the way to the frozen yogurt place. (Important to note that it only has 22 calories an ounce, and a small size has only 100 calories...) My nowDH was trying to be understanding, but I told him, as I started freaking out, if I eat this my dress won''t fit, and I was crying. He was mad, because we were in the parking lot of the place, and he didn''t want to eat icecream in front of me. It was horrible. Please note ladies starving myself and working out like a FIEND , I only lost 3 pounds. Stress + Starvation = NO WEIGHT LOSS AND A CRAZY LADY.

2) I didn''t want anyone (my guests) to see me before the ceremony. I guess because my DH saw me w/ photos, my folks, my party.. so I wanted SOME element of surprise to my entrance. Walking into the hotel, I had a large blue blanket wraped around me and my girls were holding up towels to block my face. People I didn''t know, that were just staying at the hotel, grabbed my blanket to see my dress, and I FLIPPED. Said a few naughty words, and possibly a threat. All the weight lifting made me oh so scary... not. After this happened, my grandpa, wanted to give me a wedding gift. He wanted me to open it in front of him. THIS IS BEFORE THE CEREMONY, when I''m still in blue blanket freak out mode. I told him I didn''t want anyone to see me before the wedding, as I was hiding my face, and he threw his card in my blanket and I closed a door in his face. I still feel bad about basically slamming the door on my Gpa, but not on the strangers. I guess I could have handled it w/ more grace... it was just OH SO IMPORTANT to me to have my entrance be grand to SOMEONE. Silly me... I should have behaved better, because you can''t take back things like that.