Irrational Stress?

[mjso]

Okay, so I just need to know I''m not crazy (or maybe I am

)!

I''m really not that far into planning my wedding, but I keep stressing out that there is no way I can live up to my own expectations.

I keep looking at photos and profiles of other weddings from "normal" people (to get ideas) and I wonder how in the world they have done it. Everyone seems to have these amazing settings (whether they are formal or informal) with great style and atmosphere. Not to mention it seems like every bride I see is a "size 2-could-be-a-model". Does everyone just look gorgeous on their wedding day?

I''m quite on the far extreme of "not-girly"...when I talked to my mom about my wedding (after telling her that we decided not to get married in the church because it is just too much work) she said "I always thought you''d be one of those people that get married out in the middle of the woods" (I''m still not exactly sure what this means!! lol) I just feel like I have no sense of what/how to get a wedding to be so pretty and magical.

I''m a jeans and a sweatshirt kind of girl and people still think my FI and I are still in college or younger...we got carded when we went to see Borat. (He''s 27 and I''m 25, but have been out of college for 4 years now) We live in a house with two roommates and we have no decorations or interior style. But I still want my wedding to be elegant and beautiful!!

Am I just stressed out needlessly? Will our vendors be sure to make things look good? Or do I need to find some kind of "how to become more girly" class? Did/Do any of you have concerns about your day living up to "wedding expectations"?

Thanks for reading this all if you got through it, guess I just needed a little rant-time. I have exactly two female friends, both of which live on the other side of the country, which is making this even harder!!

 

[FacetFire]

I have similar stresses, but what has really helped me is hiring a wedding planner. She''s not doing it all for me, but rather a mid-level kind of deal where she helps me with ideas and finds vendors. It is really helping...she has great ideas because she has done this so many times. I never had an idea of what I wanted my wedding to be like, so I certainly don''t have a vision with all the details figured out. My problem is that I like all the ideas! It seems like there are so many choices and possibilities out there, it''s hard to pick and choose. But I have confidence that she will help pull everything together and it will turn out great.

 

[jcrow]

you are sane. and quite normal. i bet many many many girls have felt the exact same way as you do.
it''s all overwhelming and you don''t know where to begin. but things fall into place and then a beautiful wedding emerges.
and i don''t think you need to be girly or have a girly wedding in order for it to be beautiful and elegant.
when choosing vendors go with those that you love their style and taste.
and as far as wedding expectations - i think what so great about weddings, you don''t have to be like everyone else! do what suites you and your fiance best. if you want a wedding in a field, do it. many times it''s the unexpected details, locations, dresses, etc. that make the wedding most memorable and enjoyable! so go with your gut, not what other''s are saying you should be doing!

 

[misysu2]

I agree. Go with your gut, and take things one at time.

I usually say, "okay, today I''m going to work on flowers"...or invites, or dress acessories, etc.

 

[mjso]

Thanks for confirming my sanity!

I thought about the wedding planner idea, and I might still do that, but I kind of feel like its spending money on something that I could spend elsewhere (of course I have no idea where!!) Definintely still considering it!

I also can totally relate to the liking everything! I''ve seen weddings on the beach I love, formal ballroom weddings I love, nautical themes I love, ranch themes I love...its like I can''t settle on what is "me" or "us".

Everytime I talk to the FI about it and show him pictures he just gets so excited that everyone in the pictures are all "kissy face" and "romantic" that he wants to cuddle and doesn''t give me any input. (Yes, he''s quite the sap

...In order to satiate his need for cuddles we got a dog and then a cat...and now our roommate''s dog...its seriously ridiculous!)

I''m trying to focus on reception/ceremony sites now, trying to have it all at one place. I think it is just so overwhelming because that is such a huge part of the planning. Once that''s settled it will be more of a details thing, which I am hoping will fall into place.

I am a horrible decision maker...my rational side always had a different opinion than my emotional side. In this case it is "nice, but reasonable and personal" vs. "pretty, pretty princess once in a lifetime splurge".