Is it tacky to wear better diamonds than the Bride??

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 3/17/2010 2:56:29 PM
Author: lilyfoot
if it symbolizes your marriage (i.e. e-ring/wedding band/anniversary band), I''d wear it. If they''re just talking about random pieces of jewelry, I''d ask if there''s a jewelry ''dress code'' for the entire bridal party, and follow that.

if there was a "jewelry dress code" then don''t invite me.

 

[mrscushion]

Date: 3/17/2010 2:58:09 PM
Author: somethingshiny
I guess I should just wear the smaller channel set band alone and call it a day....
I will be wearing the cross that she adores and has gifted us and simple stud earrings, probably no bracelet although I'm so used to wearing a watch I may throw on a plain bangle.
If this wasn't for my sis, I'd laugh it off, but I really don't want to irritate her on her wedding day.

Yup. That's what I would do. It's not going to kill you, and it'll make her happy.

She is DEFINITELY telling to leave the diamonds at home, through the "gaudy" comment and through her BMs' comments. I'm not saying she's right (in fact, I think she's really not), but she's your sis and it's her wedding, so I'd just go along with it.

 

[Lilac]

I think unless your diamonds are unbelievably huge and over the top, most people will be focusing entirely on the girl in the big white dress

. I don''t think she should worry... as beautiful as I''m sure your diamonds are, I honestly think 99% of the people will only be looking at how pretty the bride looks.

If I were you I would wear my rings proudly - there''s only so much you can be asked to do/not do to accommodate the bride''s preferences, and I think not wearing your rings is too much to ask!

 

[lilyfoot]

Date: 3/17/2010 2:58:09 PM
Author: somethingshiny
It's only the ering/wedding band. Sis has only said they are 'gaudy' and has not made any requests about them for the wedding (although it appears that perhaps THAT was her request). The request is coming from a couple bridesmaids.(not family. My family would never ask a woman to take off her ring and for the most part they find it inappropriate that I don't wear my rings around the house.)

The reason I'm concerned by it is because these aren't my original set. They are upgrades. So, I kind of get why it's a big deal to THEM. To THEM there is no symbolism since it's not the rings I was married in. To THEM, it's just 'show.' To me, it's my rings. They are technically anniversary pieces, but I wear them as a symbol of my commitment.

I would gladly leave my ering at home but the biggest offender seems to be my new wedding band. I wear a .77 cushion in a pave setting as an e-ring and had been wearing a small channel set band with it. Recently, I got a 1ctw 5 stone that I've been wearing as a wedding band. Like I said, not big on PS, but big enough to cause a problem. I guess I should just wear the smaller channel set band alone and call it a day....


I will be wearing the cross that she adores and has gifted us and simple stud earrings, probably no bracelet although I'm so used to wearing a watch I may throw on a plain bangle.

If this wasn't for my sis, I'd laugh it off, but I really don't want to irritate her on her wedding day.

What does her engagement ring or wedding band look like (if you know)?

Honestly, I would have a huge problem with anybody telling me not to wear my engagement ring and/or wedding band.

The ONLY thing I can think about where it might be awkward is if there is a close-up picture of the BM and brides hands (i.e. hands holding bouquets), and your ring may end up outshining hers.

 

[kittybean]

To me, wearing my wedding set (upgraded or not!) is non-negotiable. Other jewelry = totally up to the bride.

 

[somethingshiny]

You guys have me giggling. Thank you!!

Kenny~ What you propose is sacrilege PS style!!!


Whitby~ The Look she''s after is apparently 1986. I think a bangle would suit her just fine!

Haven~ I tend to agree with your analysis completely. But, I think I''ll be giving in to just the channel set.

Swimmer~ YES. I will look like a tomato, prostitute, **** star. The last thing I was concerned about was my rings!




I''ll just wear the channel set and make her happy. This whole bridezilla thing is a bit out of hand though. After the dress, the request to put me in 4" heels at 6 months pregnant, the tacky cross, the black eyeliner, I''ve just had enough. At least I''m not a groomsman wearing a red satin bowtie and cumberbund

.

But, I am SOO wearing ALL of my jewelry this weekend to the bachelorette party and shower!!!



Someone asked what her ering and wband look like. Here is a pic of her ering, .5 cttw and the band is a .25 channel set. Low clarity, color, not much sparkle. Very Maul.

 

[HollyS]

I think it would be extremely tacky of anyone to notice.

However,

If your diamonds are HUGE as compared to hers, and I mean HUGE, then why not wear less on her big day? It would be a lovely gesture on your part.

 

[Cehrabehra]

Date: 3/17/2010 2:24:19 PM
Author: Upgradable
I think your situation is a little different, being that you are Maid of Honor and sister of the bride. In this situation I would say less is more, and let the bride shine brightest.

just to throw it out there even though it could be construed as rude - I''m sure she had plenty of opportunity to acquire something "ps worthy" had she wanted it. Maybe small, but quality nonetheless.

I would wear my original wedding ring. If it''s blingy - who gives a crap, if it''s modest, so be it.

 

[somethingshiny]

I don't have my original set anymore. My original diamond is in a pendant and the rest was traded in. All I have is my 'ering' channel set band and 5 stone.

eta~ She could have had something PS worthy, but she thinks diamonds are a waste of money...

 

[Lady_Disdain]

Date: 3/17/2010 8:41:14 PM
Author: somethingshiny
I don''t have my original set anymore. My original diamond is in a pendant and the rest was traded in. All I have is my ''ering'' channel set band and 5 stone.

eta~ She could have had something PS worthy, but she thinks diamonds are a waste of money...

Yet she still feels insecure because of yours?

I respect people with different priorities, but I think this is just incoherent.

 

[lightningbug]

If your husband is more handsome is she going to ask you to leave him at home, too?

 

[NYCsparkle]

Date: 3/17/2010 9:07:26 PM
Author: lightningbug
If your husband is more handsome is she going to ask you to leave him at home, too?

hahahaa...i lol when i read this...thanks for the giggles

how old is the zilla? i wonder if she''ll say any gaudy comments when she gets ripped at the bachelorette party.

 

[kenny]

Date: 3/17/2010 8:41:14 PM
Author: somethingshiny
She could have had something PS worthy, but she thinks diamonds are a waste of money...

That does it.

You need to rent some 30-carat Harry Winston bull horn for a day.
This lady''s got some issues.

 

[Gypsy]

SS I think you have fabulous taste. NOTHING you have is gaudy.

I think your sister is being unreasonable... and so is your entire family.

That said... I''d leave the 5 stone at home and wear your channel set band and call it a day. It''s ridiculous, but honestly, I''d just be the better person and leave it be. Clearly someone has an issue. It''s not you and you have nothing to prove so take the high road-- but ONLY since it is your sister. I wouldn''t do it for anyone else.

 

[sunseeker101]

I think the request is unreasonable, and the comments about your jewelry are sour and needlessly judgmental. It sounds as though she has a real fear of being upstaged by you, and maybe in ways you''re not aware of? Whichever way it is, it probably means she knows you to be far in the lead in ways she can''t follow. I''d try and take it as a sort of twisted compliment and cut down on the adornment just the once for her highly-sensitized ego issues. Best of luck

 

[MonkeyPie]

I''d be a lot more pissed off about her calling my rings "gaudy" just because they are bigger - and better - than hers. For someone who claims to not care about diamonds, she sure has a funny way of showing it.

My rings are not optional, no matter who asked. If she honestly has a problem with the fact that yours are bigger, than she should be whining to her FI, not you.

 

[yssie]

I would not be okay being told not to wear Ering and wb - those physical symbols of your commitment to your husband should be more important to your friends/family than any jealous notions.


I would leave home or minimize anything else as a matter of course, though.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Wow. I was MOH at my sister''s wedding and my diamond is twice the size of her stone. It never even occurred to me not to wear it. Thankfully my sister is secure with her *beautiful* e-ring that she never asked me not to wear my wedding set. That just seems beyond silly.

 

[iheartscience]

I think she''s being ridiculous. No one will be paying attention to the bridesmaids, let alone their rings!

That said, it sounds like you''re going to indulge her. Appeasing her is probably the right thing to do, but her other bridezilla behavior would make me want to throw on every diamond I own just to be a brat.

 

[Octavia]

I find it very odd that anyone would request that you not wear your symbols of love and commitment to a ceremony that''s all about...love and commitment. Very odd, indeed.

But you know your sister, and if it would cause a rift, it might be better to just wear the channel-set band. I''d be annoyed in that situation, though.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 3/17/2010 11:16:21 PM
Author: thing2of2
I think she''s being ridiculous. No one will be paying attention to the bridesmaids, let alone their rings!

That said, it sounds like you''re going to indulge her. Appeasing her is probably the right thing to do, but her other bridezilla behavior would make me want to throw on every diamond I own just to be a brat.

and get my nose pierced so I could wear a 1ct ACA (or whatever is the new PS perfect diamond rage) in my schnauz.

 

[VRBeauty]

Just wear your channel-set band, and consider the personal sacrifice part of your wedding gift to your sister.

Seriously, I''m with Gypsy. If it were anyone other than your sister... forgetaboutit. Since she is your sister, make this concession to her insecurities and then forgetaboutit.

 

[VRBeauty]

Date: 3/17/2010 9:07:26 PM
Author: lightningbug
If your husband is more handsome is she going to ask you to leave him at home, too?

 

[Imdanny]

Date: 3/17/2010 6:56:56 PM
Author: mscushion

Date: 3/17/2010 2:58:09 PM

Author: somethingshiny

I guess I should just wear the smaller channel set band alone and call it a day....

I will be wearing the cross that she adores and has gifted us and simple stud earrings, probably no bracelet although I''m so used to wearing a watch I may throw on a plain bangle.

If this wasn''t for my sis, I''d laugh it off, but I really don''t want to irritate her on her wedding day.

Yup. That''s what I would do. It''s not going to kill you, and it''ll make her happy.


She is DEFINITELY telling to leave the diamonds at home, through the ''gaudy'' comment and through her BMs'' comments. I''m not saying she''s right (in fact, I think she''s really not), but she''s your sis and it''s her wedding, so I''d just go along with it.

This.

 

[reader]

I feel bad for the guy your sister is marrying.

Oh, and you must share pics of the dress.

 

[vespergirl]

Date: 3/17/2010 2:13:49 PM
Author: Haven
A wedding is about a marriage between two people.
Period.

When people make it about other things, that''s their issue, not mine.

I would wear my rings, and I''d be very offended if someone asked me to leave my set at home because it was too big.

Ditto. Wear your rings.

 

[brilliance4me]

You know what, dealing with ''family" can really be stressful. Here you are being ablsolutely supportive of your sisters happy happy day the day she joins hands with the man she loves and she is concerned about ''YOUR'' rings!

Wow!

Shiny, doesn''t our wedding jewelry represent our bond with our mate, our love, our happines? Definitely do what you are comfortable doing. I say wear your jewelry with your head high!

 

[steph72276]

I would wear my wedding rings and leave off the other jewelry except what she wants. I''ve never heard of anyone requesting someone leave off their wedding bands, that is pretty rude IMO.

 

[Indylady]

Date: 3/17/2010 11:59:52 PM
Author: VRBeauty

Date: 3/17/2010 9:07:26 PM

Author: lightningbug

If your husband is more handsome is she going to ask you to leave him at home, too?

Bahahaha!

 

[trillionaire]

Date: 3/17/2010 2:13:49 PM
Author: Haven
A wedding is about a marriage between two people.
Period.

When people make it about other things, that's their issue, not mine.

ITA with Haven, and no one has a right to tell you what jewelry to wear and when. However, I also agree with SBDE. If you are gracious and willing to be minorly inconvenienced for the comfort and happiness of the bride, it would speak volumes of you, and you alone.