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Its time to assemble the treasure of memories...

perry

perry

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 19, 2004
Messages
2,547
My father passed peacefully in his sleep about 6 hours ago. He had lived a full life.

I do not want anyone to think this is a time of sadness. It is not.

It is a time to assemble and compile the treasury of the good memories.

His body is being donated to the local medical school. Something my parents arranged years ago.

A memorial service will be scheduled in several weeks to a month. My mother is in no rush at this time.

For those of you who remember the old threads about the trials and tribulations of caring for our elderly parents; and my struggles - this is just another part of it.

Also, if I don't make compete sense... please forgive me. I do have to admit that I am struggling with a varity of feelings.

I did think that my Pricescope Family would want to know.

Perry
 
Oh yes, I totally understand... well I think I do. When my mom died I had a strange bubble around me, it was such an odd time, not always sad, but different from anything I'd felt before. Sometimes the grief was wracking, other times it was numbing. Often I just needed things to be super *normal* including being able to laugh, even sometimes at little ironies. I think the demand on us to be "appropriate" is unreasonable as we each experience this in our own ways. In many ways I deliberately created a world of denial, in other ways I was extremely analytical, pondering often how someone could be there one minute and gone the next - much the reversal of the birth I'd had just a few months prior. Once that being pops out there is no denying it... but they slip away in much the same way... and they're just gone, with no real explanation other than the ones we comfort ourselves with. There is such a thing as a good death, and really that's all we can ever hope for - to be at peace and have our loved ones at peace when we pass. Death is inevitable, so embracing the beautiful aspects of it can seem insulting for those who cannot find that beauty, but for those who can there is such a sense of peace... intermixed with spontaneous and sometimes disproportionate bouts of despair.

I wish you peace and strength and love at this time... may all that is beautiful about your father touch your soul for all of your own remaining days :)
 
You have my sympathy . . . 8)

I think it's the finality that really effects people regardless of how well prepared you might be. It's very strange.

I subscribe to Einstein's theory that "energy can neither be created nor destroyed". I believe the energy of a lifetime does not disappear. It becomes part and parcel of the universe. It's a very Taoist view, which I subscribe to. So your father's form has changed, but his essence has not.

I wish you peace.

@Cehrabehra: Very well said.
 
I'm so very sorry for your loss Perry. May your treasury of good memories be piled high.
 
Catmom|1292507154|2798452 said:
I'm so very sorry for your loss Perry. May your treasury of good memories be piled high.
Click to expand...

This, and a big ditto to Cebra...I can't say it any better.
 
My deepest sympathies Perry. May the special memories you have of your father bring you comfort during this difficult time. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts.
 
Sending you and your family my deepest sympathies. When my mom passed away I thought I was prepared, but you never are. I talk to her picture often (one sided conversatuions obviously), but you know, it always makes me feel better.
 
Hey Perry,

Just wanted to send you my condolences and let you know that you're in my thoughts. :halo:
 
I'm sorry to hear about your dad's passing. I'm glad that he will be remembered fondly.
 
I'm so sorry about your loss Perry. HUGS during this holiday season.
 
[quote="Cehrabehra|1292503996|2798434 I wish you peace and strength and love at this time... may all that is beautiful about your father touch your soul for all of your own remaining days [/quote]

this.

MoZo
 
I'm sending lots of prayers and strong energy. I'm glad you are able to embrace the good things, the memories, the happy times. I wish you peace during the holidays, and in the days to come.
 
Perry, my thoughts are with you during this time. Thank you for sharing with us. It makes me realize no matter how much we "chat" on Pricescope, we never really know what someone else on this forum is going through.
 
Perry,

I'm sorry for your loss. Death is never an easy thing even if you know it is coming.
I don't know much about your father, but he sounds like a wonderful man.

Take care of yourself. These next days, weeks, and months are going to be full of ups and downs and all sorts of emotions.
 
I am so sorry for your loss. My own dad died in March, so the memories of that experience are still fresh with me.

We all grieve in different ways, and I hope you are able to cope in a way that works for you. I really needed to surround myself with pictures of my dad, memories of him. For a while, the pain was so sharp that I truly did not think it would ever dull. It has though, and while I still miss him every day, I am truly able to now think of him and not feel sad. Not always, but more often that not.

You and your family will be in my thoughts.
 
I am so very sorry
 
I am sorry for your loss, Perry. To assemble a treasure of memories is a wonderful way to commemorate his life.
 
Perry you have my heartfelt condolences in the loss of your father. You have great memories and they will help you get through this difficult time. BUT it's still a loss. So understand how you feel after being a caregiver myself.
Praying for comfort for you and your Mom as you go through the days ahead, and the strength to get through this loss.

If you need anything, your PS family will be there for you.

I am glad he passed peacefully, that's a blessing, one that I hope for when it's my time.

Kindest regards,

Lisa
 
Perry,
You and yours are in my thoughts. I truly believe that when you love someone, they never leave you. May your father and your your special times, shared together, alway be with you. I wish you peace is this season of goodwill.
 
Perry, I am so sorry about your dear dad; I think that is a beautiful way to remember him. Thinking of you.
 
Perry...sorry to hear this news. :(sad
 
I'm so very sorry for your loss, Perry :((
 
I'm sorry for your loss, Perry.
 
death isn't always easy, but i'm hoping you're finding peace and comfort. you said it yourself he led a full life, and sometimes the best way to honor it isn't to cry and feel pitiful, but laugh and enjoy the good memories. i hope you're able to find the best way for you and your family to grieve and accept.

all the best.
 
Perry, you have my sympathies during this difficult time. I hope that your many memories comfort you and bring you peace.
 
Perry, im very sorry for your loss, ill be thinking of you...
 
Perry, I'm sorry for your loss. I hope that your treasure of memories will comfort you, especially in the difficult few days ahead. Thinking about you.

Jen
 
May peace be with you at this time Perry. :saint:
 
Thank all of you for your comments.

Things are going well - and other family members have stepped up a lot to help.

Today, I'm just trying to catch up on some sleep.

Perry
 
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