Let it all hangout -- The Grumpies, whinies, complainies Get It Off Your Chest Thread....

[missy]

Being alone and being lonely are two very different issues/concepts.

Although I am largely alone (discounting the pets for company), however, I am not lonely.

I am too busy doing things, and being out and about to be lonely.

If I have time to spare, I sleep!

What brought this on? The countless adverts from charities about people being on their own and feeling lonely, and the festive season is particularly hard for them etc. etc..

DK

And sometimes the most alone one can feel is in a room with a bunch of people who don't really care about you one iota. No I am with you. I prefer the company of my pets to most.


But this can be a challenging time of year for people who have lost loved ones and are feeling more vulnerable now. IIRC suicides are up during the holidays. So PSA if anyone here knows anyone who might be feeling alone check in on them and be there for them. The holidays can be tough for many

 

[dk168]

And sometimes the most alone one can feel is in a room with a bunch of people who don't really care about you one iota. No I am with you. I prefer the company of my pets to most.


But this can be a challenging time of year for people who have lost loved ones and are feeling more vulnerable now. IIRC suicides are up during the holidays. So PSA if anyone here knows anyone who might be feeling alone check in on them and be there for them. The holidays can be tough for many

I self-care for certain, in that I do not rely on other people for my own happiness and well-being.

As for looking out for other people who are vulnerable - yes to that too.

DK

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Can relate. I have someone like this at work and it's jarring when people are rude for no apparent reason whatsoever, especially since I work on a small team.

But because I work on a small team, I'm a little bit more aware of everyone's situations in life and the person who is rude seems to be going through a lot.

Sometimes it's insecurity, feeling intimidated, or otherwise being overwhelmed with life that causes people to lash out or be rude. I've let go of the expectation that people should always respond in kind to my social pleasantries and come to the realization that sometimes the underlying expectation of meeting social standards bothers them as well. They have the attitude of "Who does this person think they are?" It's weird but this has been my experience so I just avoid people who seem to get triggered by my mere existence.

the little village i used to work in had really high rates (property taxes)
every time the rates were due by workmate became a total B
took me a few years to work it out (you can pay rates quarterly)
i learnt to just ignore her during the finacially stressful times
no - i dont think its a good enough excuse for being a B but i certainly understand it was stressful for her

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Update on the Christmas morning breakfast for the homeless and vulnerable people charity...

The shift leader consulted the guests and they said bacon (or fried egg for non-meat eaters) will be sufficient for the Christmas morning breakfast.

The two cooks who insisted on cooking sausages had since gone very quiet , and the shift leader asked me to help instead.

Fine by me except it will be a very early start on Christmas morning!

Not an issue, it means I shan't have a lazy Christmas morning, that's all. I can go back to bed any time during the day - the joy of spending Christmas and Boxing Days on my own with just the pets for company by choice!

DK

for the sake of the people eatting the dinner, im glad you put your foot down
but i do beleave you have much tastier snarlers* in the UK than we do here

*interesting tid bit
Gary had a Welsh friend,
he kept calling sussages growlers as he forgot we call then snarlers in NZ
sussages definatly not a growler

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

so i went to pick up a couple o things today
my jet, corral and pearl necklace, i kind of like it, it looks vintage
but it was not knotted
thats the whole bl**dy reason i take them in
the corral beads are tiny, if it breaks ill never be able to pick them all up
sigh
maybe ill just see how much i wear it before i worry about it
i mean pearls, jet and corral are a similar hardness and none of them were expensive, the jet and the pearls being leftovers
i did leave written instructions that i wanted knotts either side of the pearls though so it does pi** me off a wee bit

the other PITA is i went to pick up my other wee job sitting at the family jewler in town
they said an email had been sent -well i never got it
they said they could only put 2 of the 4 diamonds into the pendant due to size
so i took it around to my new man
he said he can get 3 of then in

 

[pearlsngems]

My DH forced a bottle of sparkling cider into a tight space on our fridge door bin (basket) and cracked the side of the bin from top to bottom.

I scoured the Internet for a replacement bin. There are none for this particular 2016 fridge.

We'll have to duct tape it together and only put lightweight things in it from now on. Sigh.

 

[Matata]

I scoured the Internet for a replacement bin. There are none for this particular 2016 fridge.

We'll have to duct tape it together and only put lightweight things in it from now on. Sigh.

Silver lining, fridges have a 5-7 yr. life span and yours is considered an elder in fridge world. Perhaps you'll be shopping for a new one soon (which will cost a lot more than your 2016 model and still last about 5 yrs if you're lucky).

 

[pearlsngems]

Silver lining, fridges have a 5-7 yr. life span and yours is considered an elder in fridge world. Perhaps you'll be shopping for a new one soon (which will cost a lot more than your 2016 model and still last about 5 yrs if you're lucky).

The fridge it replaced lasted 22 years, and the one in the basement is 28 y.o. and has never given us trouble. I realize appliances have shorter lives these days, but when we bought this one, it was literally the only side-by-side that would fit the space. Fridges are taller than they used to be. The cabinets over it are low and all the other fridges I researched were just a bit too tall. We don't want to have to redo the cabinets just to get a new fridge to fit! And I really prefer a side by side due to the layout of our small kitchen. There is nowhere a fridge can go but that spot.

For sure the kitchen could use a do-over but I think due to how many other home projects we must do in the next 5 years or so, we will have to limit ourselves to replacing the countertop, sink, 20+ y.o. dishwasher and 38 y.o. old stove. (I'd say, "unless we win the lottery" but we don't play!)

My husband superglued the bin and taped it for reinforcement, and it's back in use-- I placed it lower on the door and moved another one up to take its place. I will only put lightweight items in it.

 

[Lookinagain]

Silver lining, fridges have a 5-7 yr. life span and yours is considered an elder in fridge world. Perhaps you'll be shopping for a new one soon (which will cost a lot more than your 2016 model and still last about 5 yrs if you're lucky).

Well, yes, new fridges only have a 5-7 year life span. On purpose I think. I have one in my basement that I bought in 1980 and have had one $75 repair in all those years, and the one currently in the kitchen was purchased in 1988, never needed a repair. That's why I don't want to upgrade my appliances! I replaced a 28 year old microwave that still worked fine but the handle broke and of course, no replacement part available. So the new micro broke at about 5 years. Failure is built into them. It's terrible.

 

[ItsMainelyYou]

Planned obsolescence, an evil concept if there ever was one...

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

My DH forced a bottle of sparkling cider into a tight space on our fridge door bin (basket) and cracked the side of the bin from top to bottom.

I scoured the Internet for a replacement bin. There are none for this particular 2016 fridge.

We'll have to duct tape it together and only put lightweight things in it from now on. Sigh.

bugga
you might find your local repair agent can get a 2nd hand one
my fridge i brought in 2018 better last more than 5 years, in saying that i had a replacement under warrenty in 2020 for it
i kept the two crisper bins and two of the glass shelves just in case
i have cracked a basket in my freezer, so i feel your pain

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

so this year for the first time ever i was really looking forward to working xmas , but then our shop had to close due to smoke and water damage from a fire next door
we have reopened on reduced everything temproarly this week and next
but our manager is on leave as her hubbie had a hernia opp and he has a bad habit of not resting and the hernea pops out again so he must be watched for his won good
so the mother ship (the bakery) have sent a girl from the bakery over to help
she has taken over
our owner baker is refering to her for everything and our shop staff all feel left out of the loop
even when our reopening was in the front page in the local paper, she was in the photo when it should have been our manager who has been there 20 years (that was the day before her hubby had the opp)
its really awful, its like its not our shop anymore, she is a bl**dy know it all (on every subject you can imangine) to boot
we are only working till 1.30 but im ready to scream by then so just as well

then to top it all off this girl chats more than works and we are getting away well after 2pm when with two if us at that time of the day we should be all packed up and cleaned by then, tomorrow is the day we take the pie warmer apart to clean and im dreading it (that is a two man job)
also she want to serve every dam customer and will interupt and says the prices (which she gets wrong)
i dont have nice handwriting so i asked her to write a sign with our reduced hours for the door as we will be closed on saturday- it took her two hours and she didnt even put the simple info on i asked her two
yesterday when my other workmate finished at the end of her shift i was only half joking when i begged her to stay -she said she was glad it wasnt just her who felt that way (so its not me being overly sensitive)
too top everything off the aircon need a service and its filter changed so its out of action and its summer
we have to have back and front door open to keep up vntilation as even after 4 weeks everything still smells of smoke the part of the shop the customers see is clean butt the whole plave is due a deep clean and then painted and some electrivcal work done (which is why we cant be fully open) AND OUR SCREEN DOOR WAS WRENCHED OFF ITS HINGERS BY THE FIRE BRIGADE SO WE ARE FLY SPRAYING EVERYTIME THERE ARE NO CUSTOMERS IN THE SHOP
NEXT DOOR WHERE THE FIRE WAS HAS HAD THE BUILDERS IN ALL WEEK, SO GOODNESS KNOWS WHEN THEY WILL GET TO US
NO TRADESMAN WANTS WORK XMAS WEEK, ITS SUMMER HOLIDAYS HERE AND MOST TRADIES HAVE 4 OR 5 WEEKS OFF OVER XMAS


OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
EXCUSE THE CAPITAL LETTERS ITS BEDTIME HERE AND I HAVE THE LIGHTS OFF

 

[Lisa Loves Shiny]

Someone hacked my Paypal account and changed it to a business account. They changed the email and phone number so I was locked out. I am grateful that I got it sorted out this morning over the phone and grateful there were no pending charges. So- friendly reminder to change passwords often, set up 2 step authentication and never link a debit account to Paypal.

 

[MissGotRocks]

Bought a Christmas pillow cover from Pottery Barn. Had been looking at it for a couple of years - expensive but finally went on sale with free shipping. Got it and on a pillow it looked nothing like the picture in the website. Not smooth but wrinkly and just not eye pleasing. I contacted them, shipped it back and had to call about my refund. Finally in my account today - short $12.01. Called and they charged me for return shipping which was not previously mentioned. It was light as a feather so shipping is charged according to purchase price. Ridiculous! I could have returned it to one of their stores had I known even though it is a bit out of the way. If they need to charge for return shipping, be fair and be upfront with the policy! Crazy!

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

well i am now on a long weekend for xmas
yesterday at work was so bad, i cleaned that bl**dy pie warmer all on my own and the cream cabinet
usually how its done is one person washes the shelves, glass doors etc in the sink while the other wipes out the actually cabinet/ pie warmer with soapy water
then i got left on my own to finsih up
usually on a friday with two of us we get away pretty much on time, but yesterday i was over an hour late
you just cant leave it for the next day (or wednesday in this case) it has to be all ready for the next day's trade when the early shift come in in the morning
i did have angry tears going on by the end

and then we didnt get an xmas present -i mean i guess its understanable this year with the fire
sigh
and there were no nice xmasy left overs for us as the other stores are open today so all persables that would have expired while we are closed were sent back to the bakery to be sold today

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

oh @missy
our thread has been locked
i wanted to post about that new movie with Anthony Hopkins about the Kindertransport and Sir Nicholas WInton

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Hmmm. For some reason my clothes feel tight.

cheers--Sharon

 

[SparklieBug]

HI:

Hmmm. For some reason my clothes feel tight.

cheers--Sharon

Hmm. For some reason, my clothes also feel tight. I wonder if something's in the detergent, these days?!

 

[Lookinagain]

Well, mine are too tight as well, but considering I'm in my 60's I know one thing that isn't the reason!

 

[Lookinagain]

I just came in from taking out the recycling and saw this. Bummer.

 

[canuk-gal]

I just came in from taking out the recycling and saw this. Bummer.

Total! Do you think you'll be able to find it?

 

[Lookinagain]

Total! Do you think you'll be able to find it?

Oh, I doubt it. I'm not even going to try to look since it is probably somewhere between the living room and the garage recycle bin. DK didn't make it but next time I have him do something for me, I'll ask him to replace it. I hate going to local jewelers who overcharge and under deliver. It was just a shock to look down and see that. The stone was there shortly before.

 

[SparklieBug]

Yet more security alerts that a variety of online sites have had password leaks. This resulted in time spent changing passwords. CRIPES!!!

 

[VRBeauty]

My late MIL’s boyfriend, “Al,” is very much a part of our lives because he’s part of my late MIL’s trust, which my husband administers.

He recently got scammed out of almost all of his savings, including a not small bequest my mother-in-law had left him, and the proceeds from the sale of one of their cars. It was a telephone scam in which the callers convinced him he had won the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes, but had to pay the taxes up front to claim his winnings. He was apparently skeptical and reluctant to participate, but they kept after him until they wore down his resistance. They promised him a monthly payments that would erase his financial worries, and allow him to leave an inheritance for his kids. They sent him photographs of Steve Harvey holding “his” check, and had both “Steve Harvey” and the “CEO of Publishers Clearinghouse” talk to him on the phone (both fake, I’m sure.). They convinced him to lie to the bank about the reasons for his big withdrawal, and they timed everything just right to prevent the bank from reversing anything once the scheme was uncovered.

The worst part of the whole thing is how the scam left “Al” feeling about himself. It took about a week before he was able to call and tell us about what happened - and I think we were the first family members he confided in. (All this happened while we were traveling on the other side of the country, though I doubt that it would have made any difference if we’d been nearer.) The bright side is that “Al” had been languishing since my MIL’s death about two years ago - and he’s now more serious about selling his artwork. Plus my late MIL owned the house they lived in outright, and her trust provides for him to continue living there - and left him another car that he could sell.

Still this whole scam business makes me so mad - especially the way they seem to prey on seniors. (My late father got caught in a scam in the years before his death, but it was much, much smaller and his bank was eventually willing to restore most of what he lost.) And it’s frightening.

 

[Lookinagain]

My late MIL’s boyfriend, “Al,” is very much a part of our lives because he’s part of my late MIL’s trust, which my husband administers.

He recently got scammed out of almost all of his savings, including a not small bequest my mother-in-law had left him, and the proceeds from the sale of one of their cars. It was a telephone scam in which the callers convinced him he had won the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes, but had to pay the taxes up front to claim his winnings. He was apparently skeptical and reluctant to participate, but they kept after him until they wore down his resistance. They promised him a monthly payments that would erase his financial worries, and allow him to leave an inheritance for his kids. They sent him photographs of Steve Harvey holding “his” check, and had both “Steve Harvey” and the “CEO of Publishers Clearinghouse” talk to him on the phone (both fake, I’m sure.). They convinced him to lie to the bank about the reasons for his big withdrawal, and they timed everything just right to prevent the bank from reversing anything once the scheme was uncovered.

The worst part of the whole thing is how the scam left “Al” feeling about himself. It took about a week before he was able to call and tell us about what happened - and I think we were the first family members he confided in. (All this happened while we were traveling on the other side of the country, though I doubt that it would have made any difference if we’d been nearer.) The bright side is that “Al” had been languishing since my MIL’s death about two years ago - and he’s now more serious about selling his artwork. Plus my late MIL owned the house they lived in outright, and her trust provides for him to continue living there - and left him another car that he could sell.

Still this whole scam business makes me so mad - especially the way they seem to prey on seniors. (My late father got caught in a scam in the years before his death, but it was much, much smaller and his bank was eventually willing to restore most of what he lost.) And it’s frightening.

This happens so often and it makes me so angry. I wish there were better way to educate older people about these risks, but younger ones too. An employee of mine in her 40's got scammed and gave up info on her bank account to someone on the phone. And she should have known better. I was in the financial services side of things and we were constantly telling the people we worked with inside and outside of the company about all of these scams, yet she still fell for it. Of course she was very embarrassed. There should be more and more educational stuff on TV and online that is in your face, so maybe folks will pick up on these scams more frequently. I'm sorry this happened to him.

 

[canuk-gal]

My late MIL’s boyfriend, “Al,” is very much a part of our lives because he’s part of my late MIL’s trust, which my husband administers.

He recently got scammed out of almost all of his savings, including a not small bequest my mother-in-law had left him, and the proceeds from the sale of one of their cars. It was a telephone scam in which the callers convinced him he had won the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes, but had to pay the taxes up front to claim his winnings. He was apparently skeptical and reluctant to participate, but they kept after him until they wore down his resistance. They promised him a monthly payments that would erase his financial worries, and allow him to leave an inheritance for his kids. They sent him photographs of Steve Harvey holding “his” check, and had both “Steve Harvey” and the “CEO of Publishers Clearinghouse” talk to him on the phone (both fake, I’m sure.). They convinced him to lie to the bank about the reasons for his big withdrawal, and they timed everything just right to prevent the bank from reversing anything once the scheme was uncovered.

The worst part of the whole thing is how the scam left “Al” feeling about himself. It took about a week before he was able to call and tell us about what happened - and I think we were the first family members he confided in. (All this happened while we were traveling on the other side of the country, though I doubt that it would have made any difference if we’d been nearer.) The bright side is that “Al” had been languishing since my MIL’s death about two years ago - and he’s now more serious about selling his artwork. Plus my late MIL owned the house they lived in outright, and her trust provides for him to continue living there - and left him another car that he could sell.

Still this whole scam business makes me so mad - especially the way they seem to prey on seniors. (My late father got caught in a scam in the years before his death, but it was much, much smaller and his bank was eventually willing to restore most of what he lost.) And it’s frightening.

Oh this is utterly heartbreaking/sickening and I wish it wasn't so. I suppose there is no legal recourse. So sad for ya'll.

 

[RMOO]

My late MIL’s boyfriend, “Al,” is very much a part of our lives because he’s part of my late MIL’s trust, which my husband administers.

He recently got scammed out of almost all of his savings, including a not small bequest my mother-in-law had left him, and the proceeds from the sale of one of their cars. It was a telephone scam in which the callers convinced him he had won the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes, but had to pay the taxes up front to claim his winnings. He was apparently skeptical and reluctant to participate, but they kept after him until they wore down his resistance. They promised him a monthly payments that would erase his financial worries, and allow him to leave an inheritance for his kids. They sent him photographs of Steve Harvey holding “his” check, and had both “Steve Harvey” and the “CEO of Publishers Clearinghouse” talk to him on the phone (both fake, I’m sure.). They convinced him to lie to the bank about the reasons for his big withdrawal, and they timed everything just right to prevent the bank from reversing anything once the scheme was uncovered.

The worst part of the whole thing is how the scam left “Al” feeling about himself. It took about a week before he was able to call and tell us about what happened - and I think we were the first family members he confided in. (All this happened while we were traveling on the other side of the country, though I doubt that it would have made any difference if we’d been nearer.) The bright side is that “Al” had been languishing since my MIL’s death about two years ago - and he’s now more serious about selling his artwork. Plus my late MIL owned the house they lived in outright, and her trust provides for him to continue living there - and left him another car that he could sell.

Still this whole scam business makes me so mad - especially the way they seem to prey on seniors. (My late father got caught in a scam in the years before his death, but it was much, much smaller and his bank was eventually willing to restore most of what he lost.) And it’s frightening.

My father has been scammed a couple of times to varying degrees. To my knowledge, the largest amount was $2600. I finally got so mad, I told them not to pick up the phone unless they recognize the phone number. Everyone else can leave a message. If it is a legit call, like their doctors office, they will leave a message. I told them never to call back from a message unless they retrieve the number from their separate files. I also inform them of any scams I hear of in the hopes that if they get a similar call, they will recognize it. Sooo frustrating! I think they pick on old people because for the most part, they are not familiar with the sophistication of scammers. They trust to much.

 

[Rfisher]

Whatever lie that worked to not throw up red flags to the bank for what amounted to someone’s life savings - I find interesting.
Not that I’m saying it’s the backs fault in any way.
Sad. And mad.

 

[Austina]

That’s awful @VRBeauty. Unfortunately not uncommon these days. Please tell him to be ultra vigilant, because these scummy scammers sell a person’s details to other scammers, it’s known as the ’Mugs List’, and even though he’s been wiped out, some other scammer may come up with a get rich quick scheme he could be vulnerable to.

 

[RMOO]

That’s awful @VRBeauty. Unfortunately not uncommon these days. Please tell him to be ultra vigilant, because these scummy scammers sell a person’s details to other scammers, it’s known as the ’Mugs List’, and even though he’s been wiped out, some other scammer may come up with a get rich quick scheme he could be vulnerable to.

Yes, although I had heard it was called a “suckers list.” In other words, an easy mark.