My wedding dress came rolled up in a fed-ex box...

[TravelingGal]

Some of you know how I''m feeling about the whole wedding planning thing from the thread "thirty-something bride blues" (thanks for all your insight on that post btw!). So here''s the deal...

I did find a clearance dress in a regular dress shop, but they didn''t have my size. They found it at another store and shipped it to me. Long story short, the dress was not in perfect condition, and it also arrived rolled up in a fed-ex box. The dress was on sale for $100.

I think I have a twisted sense of humor sometimes, and I kind of saw this as funny. Who else but me would not care if their wedding dress came rolled up in a ball! Also, the spaghetti straps were dirty (from hanging on the clearance rack) so I took a toothbrush and some stain remover and got most it out. The real bummer was a red stain on the neckline that I couldn''t get out. But I also found a solution for that...I can alter the neckline a bit and poof! The stain is gone. There is another small stain where the front overlaps, but you can''t see that at all. Currently the dress/neckline is not altered, but I have scotch tape on it to see how it would look...hehehehehe...

The sales lady was totally apologetic and offered to take back the dress even though it was a final sale, or give me another $50 credit. I took the credit because I figured having a $50 back up dress is not a bad idea. However, I am thinking I may just stick with the dress. I really don''t care to go dress shopping.

So when I told my friend about all this, thinking it was quite amusing, she was actually kind of horrifed (she normally finds humor in the same weird things I do). She told me I could not wear a "used, dirty, dress." Well, it''s not used, but yes, it could be cleaner - but I don''t think it''s really dirty, and unless i told you, I don''t think you''d notice. My boyfriend is a bit worried about it and commented "my outfit will cost more than your dress." I thought, yeah well, so? Who cares?

I should note that I like it and I do feel pretty in it. Our wedding is going to be so casual - on the beach with people just standing around - and my dress will get dirty on the sand anyway. We have so much money going out as I want to pay for accommodation for his entire family and all his friends who are coming from Australia, as well as help with airfare if I can. I just figure, if I can save money on the dress, that''s a good thing.

Do you think if you were in my shoes, you''d regret not wearing something a bit more "special" on your wedding day? I''ll post the dress below (and if my boyfriend is reading, if you don''t wanna see the dress, don''t scroll down!) Thanks in advance for your input!

 

[TravelingGal]

The dress...

ETA - forgive its crumpled appearance...it was rolled up in that fed-ex SMALL box, after all!

 

[FireGoddess]

I think it''s nice and light and flowy for a beach wedding - and if you like it and feel pretty in it, then who cares?! I only spent $350 on my dress and I haven''t seen it since the wedding. It wasn''t my main focus either - I had lots of other stuff I needed to pay for. As long as you feel good in it, it doesn''t matter what it costs! If you feel it''s dirty, you can get it dry cleaned or something, but if it''s not, then great!

 

[Tybee]

Traveling!
It''s really pretty! I think you have the BEST attitude! I''d LOVE to see a picture of it on you... (hint hint)
50.00 aint bad!

 

[San Diego Bride]

i think this story is hysterical! there''s a red stain... hmmm... change the neckline. that''s genius! it sounds like something i would do. i wouldn''t think of it as "used" and the changes you''ve made just make it more your own. the dress looks very pretty (albeit wrinkled) on the hanger and seems perfect for an outdoor beach wedding. more importantly, you feel pretty in it. i wouldn''t worry about the cost either. if you found what you want for $100, i''d feel proud that you got it for that price. you''ll probably appreciate this... i recently bought my fiancee''s wedding ring. it was exactly what he wanted- flat, pipe-cut titanium, and it cost $55. yep 55, including engraving and shipping. i find this quite amusing. so keep smiling and just use the thousand or so dollars you would have spent on another dress for something you think is a little more important like accomodations or airfare.

congrats on your bargain. and post pictures of yourself in the dress!

 

[LizzieC]

TG, it''s a beautiful dress, and if you feel beautiful in it then you shouldn''t let other people influence you. But I do understand how you feel. The first dress I bought was a Jessica McClintock prom dress that I thought was super cute and appropriate for my fun Vegasy weeding, but just about everyone else in my life hated it, and I let that influence me.... and I ended up spending about $800 more on my dress... a dress that I will wear for 5 hours and NEVER wear again.

I''m sure I could have found much better ways to spend that money!

So I think you''re being very practical and I say if you like it- wear it! Wear the heck out of that dress!

 

[TravelingGal]

Thanks everyone...I''m glad I am not the only who thinks the dress could work. Since I had to take a pic to post here, I sent it to my friend. She called me right away and said, "OK, I love it...you can wear it, but try to see if you can get it professionally cleaned!" I am hoping that won''t be a problem, but it says do not wash and do not dry clean. It even gives a phone number of a special cleaner to take it too. I gues because it''s pretty delicate and silk.

Yeah, I do think it''s kind of hilarious. The mental image of me with a old tooth brush scrubbing the spaghetti straps in my little bathroom still makes me chuckle.

I''d model it for you ladies, but I am 8 pounds too big for the dress (size 6)...the little bit in the middle does not zip. I think I can lose it in 5 months. When I get into it, I''ll be happy to model it for you all. Thanks all for the kind and supportive words.

San Diego Bride, we''re going titanium too...maybe tungsten if we feel like splurging for his ring. We''ll take the money we save and apply it to my diamond eternity band!

Hehehe...I''m not cheap on EVERYTHING.............

 

[San Diego Bride]

funny you should mention that, traveling gal. we also splurged on my diamond eternity band. my fiancee promises he will tease me about it ($55 vs. a lot more than $55) for a long time! we looked at tungsten too. i thought it looked beautiful was definitely worth the small added expense. i also loved that it doesn''t scratch at all. but he wanted titanium because of its light weight. and he''s also into the fact that space shuttles are made from titanium. we used titaniumera.com for his ring. it should be here next week. i''ll let you know how it looks.

 

[TravelingGal]

Great...I appreciate it if you would. We are leaning toward tungsten for exactly the reasons you mentioned...he likes the weight and the fact that it does not scratch easily. He works with his hands a lot (nothing that would be dangerous though) so we want the durability.

Yeah, it''s hard to justify getting a nice wedding band when he is spending so little. But I figure with only 50 bucks on the dress...that''s what...another $500 at least I saved that goes towards the bling?

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 5/5/2006 3:06:08 PM
Author: LizzieC
TG, it''s a beautiful dress, and if you feel beautiful in it then you shouldn''t let other people influence you. But I do understand how you feel. The first dress I bought was a Jessica McClintock prom dress that I thought was super cute and appropriate for my fun Vegasy weeding, but just about everyone else in my life hated it, and I let that influence me.... and I ended up spending about $800 more on my dress... a dress that I will wear for 5 hours and NEVER wear again.

I''m sure I could have found much better ways to spend that money!

So I think you''re being very practical and I say if you like it- wear it! Wear the heck out of that dress!

Did you post a thread on this somewhere? I recall reading about this before, and I''d love to see pics!

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 5/5/2006 3:51:54 PM
Author: SanDiegoLady
I think its very pretty. Take it to get dry cleaned. Gosh those people can perform miracles! Which beach are you getting married on?

Just locally here in Southern California. Hermosa Beach. Lots of the LA girls live near me...they could probably come crash my ceremony!

 

[decodelighted]

Ommigosh. I think that story is hysterical!! Dunno if you're having kids but that's a "tell your grandkids -- or at least grandnieces & nephews" story if I ever heard one!

How you look/FEEL in the dress is all that matters really! No one would have known if you hadn't confessed to a couple gal-pals! As long as you can hide/fix the stuff that bothers you - GO FOR IT.

I just saw a story on some TLC wedding show where the girl spent 10K on a custom designer dress and the day before the wedding, they told her they couldn't get out stains on the front of it (that the store claimed had happened during the pre-wedding photo shoot). The gal's father had a LITERAL FIT ... the shop ended up overnighted fabric & had someone sew the whole front of the dress onto her. S___ happens even with a ga-jillion bucks to spend on a dress!

ETA: the pix looks VERY PRETTY too .. I love the folds & the fun hemline!

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 5/5/2006 3:57:47 PM
Author: decodelighted
Ommigosh. I think that story is hysterical!! Dunno if you''re having kids but that''s a ''tell your grandkids -- or at least grandnieces & nephews'' story if I ever heard one!

How you look/FEEL in the dress is all that matters really! No one would have known if you hadn''t confessed to a couple gal-pals! As long as you can hide/fix the stuff that bothers you - GO FOR IT.

I just saw a story on some TLC wedding show where the girl spent 10K on a custom designer dress and the day before the wedding, they told her they couldn''t get out stains on the front of it (that the store claimed had happened during the pre-wedding photo shoot). The gal''s father had a LITERAL FIT ... the shop ended up overnighted fabric & had someone sew the whole front of the dress onto her. S___ happens even with a ga-jillion bucks to spend on a dress!

ETA: the pix looks VERY PRETTY too .. I love the folds & the fun hemline!

I probably will tell my grandkids someday Deco. Probably because I do like to write, especially humorous travel vignettes, I do see most things as funny - even when it probably isn''t, and I''ll admit that gets me in trouble sometimes. I make fun of almost everything, and I''m often the butt of my own jokes. I dunno...I guess as long as I am healthy and my loved ones are healthy, there isn''t too much else to get my panties in a bunch over.

And speaking of, that''s another reason I wanna keep the dress. You can''t see my panties (I''ve even test run a pair of red thongs!)

BTW, the dress is too long for me, and the silk at the bottom hangs drapes on the ground. It''s actually pretty that way, but not too practical. And you are very right deco...catastrophes happen at any price, to anyone.

 

[sydneycasandra]

TravelingGal,

If I understand correctly, your friend and FI are a little upset because you''re NOT being a bridezilla? Is the world coming full-circle here!? I love this dilemma!

I think it''s great that you have such a relaxed attitude about your dress; you want to look pretty, you feel pretty in the dress (which IS very pretty, btw) and you only spent such a little amount of money! What''s not to LOVE!? Listen to your own feeling on this; you seem to really like the dress and are obviously a practical can-do person (tooth brush, scotch tape, I''ll alter my own neckline-attitude); don''t let them deter you. You will be gorgeous, and have lots of $$ left over for fun stuff.

Congratulations on being a sane, normal person about this! I think you are going to look lovely. The hemline is fabulous btw.

 

[flutterby]

I wouldnt worry about wearing it at all. Its a great looking dress, and you didnt spend a mint. My dress is a BM dress that I ordered in white. I was torn between it and a poofy dress with pickups. I told my FI about my dilema and he told me not to get the "cheap" dress. Well, I did get it, because i loved it. Not because it is inexpensive. I spent around $275 on my dress and it couldnt be more perfect.

Also, Selflove loves her alterations lady in Redondo. I couldnt get a hold of her so I''m going to a lady in teluca lake, but you can certainly justify alterations with the cost of the dress!

 

[TravelingGal]

MsFlutter, thanks. Do you know who the tailor is, and can you post it? Isn''t selflove getting married this weekend? So I daresay she won''t be poking around on here much. And I think you made a wise choice! Is your dress posted here? I''ve seen so many dress on PS, that I can''t remember whose is whose.

AntiguaBride, that is very sweet of you to say, thanks. I just don''t want it to come across to my boyfriend that I don''t care ENOUGH. I think he must picture the dress as being hideous or something...

Well you know what they say...scotch tape, duct tape, masking tape etc...it fixes everything!

 

[Selkie]

I love your approach to this, TravelingGal. It''s reminding me not to let my own planning get out of hand. I think that dress is great for the beach wedding, ya gotta love a bargain!

 

[flopkins]

hehe I like your thread title. I think the dress looks great, and if it was only $50, that''s even better. Besides, who is going to know you only paid $50 unless you tell them? As long as you feel pretty in it, it''s good!

I say you should try taking it to a dry cleaners to see if they can get the stain out. $10 for a dry cleaning is cheaper than paying for alterations, IMO. That''s of course if you don''t mind the neckline as is. If you like the altered look better go for it.

 

[AndyRosse]

Gorgeous!!!

 

[blueroses]

I LOVELOVELOVE it, and I think you have such a great outlook about it. I''d find a dry-cleaner who has a good reputation for delicate stuff and just get it cleaned! It is PERFECT for a Hermosa wedding!! Woohoo!!!


(MsFlutter, I ADORE your new avatar!! Gorgeous--engagement pics?)

 

[monarch64]

I love the dress, and your story, Travelin!!! Your dress could be compared to LOVE: it gets dirty or wrinkled from time to time, but you work things out, put a different spin on it, and have a great attitude, and it''s beautiful all over again!!!

When I was in high school a girl in our little town who was getting married had taken her wedding dress to the dry cleaners, and a week before her wedding the cleaners had a huge fire and her dress was damaged beyond repair. The whole town pitched in to buy her a brand new dress--I always thought that was so sweet!

 

[marvel]

Love

the dress...perfect for a beach wedding in Hermosa!

I live in Redondo, so I''ll be one of the wedding crashers

 

[Small]

I think your dress is beautiful

I spent about 350 on my dress...bought it off the rack as it was discontinued and they altered it quite a bit since it was a 12 and I needed a 4 LOL and I think the alterations matched the price I paid for the dress

As long as you love it I wouldn''t worry about what anyone else thinks. My only regret is that I didn''t try on more dresses. I was in one mindset and as soon as I saw it and tried it on that was it. I wanted long sleeves and didn''t bother to try on anything else. If I got married again, I''d definitely try on every style just to make sure I knew I exhausted all my options. And can I just tell you that I dont even have my wedding dress anymore...I donated it to a resale shop as it was too much to store...it got in my way alot LOL. I have the pictures and it''s not like I would give it to my daughter to wear so I didn''t feel bad one bit for getting rid of it. My husband was glad it wasn''t in the way anymore LOL.
You are going to look fabulous in that dress. No worries

 

[diamondfan]

I will just be repetitive, but I think it is lovely. You feel great in it, it is appropriate to the setting of your wedding...and you saved a bundle. Honestly it is a win win situation. For fun, you could go out and try on other dresses, realize you like this one, and think about what you can buy with the money you saved!

I spent nearly two thousand dollars on my dress almost sixteen years ago. It is in my basement in a box. Unless someone has a costume party or a wear your wedding dress party, I am not likely to use it again. I have three boys and I am sure none of their wives will like it at all, it will be not in style for sure by then!

I say, you are lucky, plus you have an awesome attitude about it. The story seems to be easy too, like a beach wedding. It all seems to go together well to me!

 

[blodthecat]

I think the dress is very soft and very feminine.

Don't dry clean..

Hand wash in warm soapy water. Then rinse in fabric condition. Pour the water from the bowl and hang your dress outside to drip dry. DO NOT try wringing out the water....hang it out on the line absolutely wet through.

This will remove ALL the creases....and leave your dress looking and smelling gorgeous!

I think it is perfect for an outdoor wedding!

 

[LizzieC]

Date: 5/5/2006 3:55:00 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 5/5/2006 3:06:08 PM
Author: LizzieC
TG, it''s a beautiful dress, and if you feel beautiful in it then you shouldn''t let other people influence you. But I do understand how you feel. The first dress I bought was a Jessica McClintock prom dress that I thought was super cute and appropriate for my fun Vegasy weeding, but just about everyone else in my life hated it, and I let that influence me.... and I ended up spending about $800 more on my dress... a dress that I will wear for 5 hours and NEVER wear again.

I''m sure I could have found much better ways to spend that money!

So I think you''re being very practical and I say if you like it- wear it! Wear the heck out of that dress!

Did you post a thread on this somewhere? I recall reading about this before, and I''d love to see pics!

Yeah, I think I talked about it in my dress post, but I didn''t post pics of the actual dress..... I didn''t think I still had pics of it, but I found one! I know it makes me look 16, but I thought it was cute!! Excuse the silly veil... It was a cheapo one that I tried on just for fun.

 

[San Diego Bride]

TravelingGal,

here''s an update on the titaniumera.com experience. they had the best prices for titanium (and tungsten) that i saw. they said the ring would take 8-10 business days with engraving, but was at my house less than a week after the order. the ring looks great! it''s not necessarily what i would have picked, but it''s exactly what he wants so i''m very excited about it. and all for $55. the other thing i like about titaniumera.com is that they could engrave what i wanted on the inside (28 characters). most places limited it to 14-18. overall, it was a great bargain and a great shopping experience.


DiamondFan,

about the costume party or the wear your wedding dress party.... i had a "wear your bridesmaid dress party" a few years ago. it was a blast! we had a hair/makeup/nails area and people changed into other dresses if they had multiple bridesmaid dresses in their closets. we laughed and drank and had an amazing time! at the end i collected all of the dresses and took them to be dry cleaned. then they were all donated to a radio station that was collecting old dresses to for high school proms.

 

[diamondfan]

That sounds like fun! I have heard of that, and it is such an awesome idea. And there are places to donate gowns so girls can get to the prom without having to spend a lot of money on a dress. I think it is great!

 

[sarita]

TravelingGal,

I echo the others, you have a great attitude about it and it''s a flowy, light, pretty slinky beach gown. If a the dress isn''t a big priority for you, I don''t think you will regret your choice. I only paid $300 for my dress, which was marketed as both a prom/informal wedding gown (beach wedding also). I see some of the fabulous gowns here and feel a few pangs that I won''t get to wear a real show-stopper with the tulle skirt or bodice top but at the same time it doesn''t really fit my personality either. I love the myraid of simpler styles out there right now as much as I admire the beautiful and classic silhouette of the ballgown. I think we girls get it in our heads that the big, expensive gowns are what a wedding gown should look like but the reality is it''s whatever we make it. I think you will rock your dress, especially in an ethereal draping like that, you will feel fresh and graceful.

 

[TravelingGal]

Thanks again everyone...I definitely feel better about the dress now. Especially since I''m deciding on a photographer now...yikes, those guys don''t come cheap, and I refuse to skimp on the photos!

The way I see it, the place to spend the money is on the food and drink. Give my guests enough to drink, and they''ll think I look gorgeous in a white trash bag!

Date: 5/5/2006 8:29:00 PM
Author: monarch64
I love the dress, and your story, Travelin!!! Your dress could be compared to LOVE: it gets dirty or wrinkled from time to time, but you work things out, put a different spin on it, and have a great attitude, and it''s beautiful all over again!!!

That is very sweet Monarch64, and a nice way to look at it.