NANNY CAMS??

[nycbkgirl]

So my twins are 3 mos old and MIL has been watching them during the day and I help now but im too tired in the mornings and i dont have enough time to cook and clean or even rest so we are thinking about hiring a nanny to help MIL during the days...anyone have any nanny cams that are good and worth trying out? id really like to make sure kiddos are looked after the way id like them to be.

 

[lilylover]

I have been a nanny for many years and here is my take on nanny cams.

They are completely fine, but you have to let the nanny know that they are being watched. You can be nonchalant about it. Just say something like, "Just so you know, we have surveillance inside the entire house. It helps me keep piece of mind. We completely trust you, but want to be 100 percent safe."

I was in a home that simply had the cameras in the corner of every room. They weren''t hidden at all.

 

[nycbkgirl]

Hey Lili...I actually didn''t know u had to tell them ...im not sure but in nyc u are allowed to have hidden cameras in your own house for the purposes of watching your children..of course not in bathrooms or private places. I could be wrong ...have to ask hubby and look it up.

Anyone know what the actual laws are for surveillance?

 

[nycbkgirl]

I don''t think id mind telling her there''s cameras ...I just remember seeing and hearing stories about ppl catching nannies doing stuff to their kids...would the nannies do those things if they knew they were being watched? So that leads me to believe they didn''t know?...interesting you brought that up now I need to investigate lol.

 

[nycbkgirl]

http://childcare.about.com/cs/evaluations/bb/nannycam.htm

it is legal to use hidden nanny cams..so i would have to consider whether tellin her or not

 

[Bia]

It''s best to be safe (protects both family and nanny) and not take a chance that a nanny will steal, or God forbid, hurt your children. With that being said, I would encourage telling the nanny that you had surveillance equipment throughout the house. I was a nanny in college and would have felt very uncomfortable finding out there were cameras that my employers didn''t tell me about.

Really your motive behind cameras is to protect your babies, not catch the nanny doing something bad, you know?

I live in NY and although I''m not certain, I do believe it is legal to record surveillance video in your home without permission (I don''t believe you can record audio though).

 

[brooklyngirl]

Definitely tell the nanny about the cam. This way, instead of "catching" the nanny doing something inappropriate, you prevent it from happening in the first place. Knowing you''re videotaped is like being in public, thereby they won''t do anything they wouldn''t do in public.

 

[princesss]

Date: 7/22/2009 4:21:38 PM
Author: nycbkgirl
http://childcare.about.com/cs/evaluations/bb/nannycam.htm

it is legal to use hidden nanny cams..so i would have to consider whether tellin her or not

I''d encourage telling the nanny, in part because people tend to watch their behaviour more when they know they''re being watched. (Think about what happens when you''re driving and you see a cop car - you slow down, put both hands on the wheel, check the mirrors, etc.) Admitting that you are recording could potentially keep people from accepting the job that tend to do things they know most parents wouldn''t approve of, and a visible camera or two could be a good reminder when they are frustrated that whatever they do will be monitored. It''s all about preventing something bad from happening as opposed to catching them after damage has been done, you know?

 

[D&T]

Date: 7/22/2009 4:49:29 PM
Author: brooklyngirl
Definitely tell the nanny about the cam. This way, instead of ''catching'' the nanny doing something inappropriate, you prevent it from happening in the first place. Knowing you''re videotaped is like being in public, thereby they won''t do anything they wouldn''t do in public.

Totally Agree 100%

 

[lucyandroger]

Date: 7/22/2009 4:16:52 PM
Author: nycbkgirl
I don''t think id mind telling her there''s cameras ...I just remember seeing and hearing stories about ppl catching nannies doing stuff to their kids...would the nannies do those things if they knew they were being watched? So that leads me to believe they didn''t know?...interesting you brought that up now I need to investigate lol.

The point is not to catch them doing bad things but rather to prevent them from doing bad things.

 

[brooklyngirl]

Recording sound is also a good idea. This way you know if she''s letting them cry too long before responding to them.

 

[swingirl]

You want the nanny to help your MIL. Wouldn''t the MIL be there observing the nanny anyway?

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/22/2009 4:58:10 PM
Author: swingirl
You want the nanny to help your MIL. Wouldn''t the MIL be there observing the nanny anyway?

true ...i was just going to elaborate what i forgot to mention.....i dont think nanny would ever be alone in the house (not for more than an hr at most but that might be way down the line if ever) but my point is MIL isnt one of my favorite ppl (as many of u already know lol) i really want a nanny cam for the sound and to see if they are doing what i want them to be doing with the kids. i want my nanny to be listening to me and not MIL bc MIL likes to do things her way (even tho i tell her off) but when im not around then she does what SHE wants and a nanny cam will help me see what goes on. so, its not really for worries of abusing the children, more of making sure my kids are taken care of the way I want them to be ..am i making sense

..so telling them would defeat the purpose i guess bc they wouldnt do or say anything that i wouldnt wanna hear

...maybe i shouldnt tell them the first week and then tell them once i see what goes on?..ok im rambling now. sorry lol.

 

[LadyBlue]

Date: 7/22/2009 3:48:01 PM
Author: lilylover
I have been a nanny for many years and here is my take on nanny cams.


They are completely fine, but you have to let the nanny know that they are being watched. You can be nonchalant about it. Just say something like, ''Just so you know, we have surveillance inside the entire house. It helps me keep piece of mind. We completely trust you, but want to be 100 percent safe.''


I was in a home that simply had the cameras in the corner of every room. They weren''t hidden at all.

I totally agree with lily,

I think a camara is a good idea to see how is the day of your kid, to see if the nanny play, teach, interact with your kid. Not to heard every word that she say and see if she follows a 100% what you said. A nanny should be a smart and lovely women that would be able to take small decisions during the day, for the best of your kid.

 

[LadyBlue]

Date: 7/22/2009 5:19:41 PM
Author: nycbkgirl

Date: 7/22/2009 4:58:10 PM

Author: swingirl

You want the nanny to help your MIL. Wouldn''t the MIL be there observing the nanny anyway?

true ...i was just going to elaborate what i forgot to mention.....i dont think nanny would ever be alone in the house (not for more than an hr at most but that might be way down the line if ever) but my point is MIL isnt one of my favorite ppl (as many of u already know lol) i really want a nanny cam for the sound and to see if they are doing what i want them to be doing with the kids. i want my nanny to be listening to me and not MIL bc MIL likes to do things her way (even tho i tell her off) but when im not around then she does what SHE wants and a nanny cam will help me see what goes on. so, its not really for worries of abusing the children, more of making sure my kids are taken care of the way I want them to be ..am i making sense

..so telling them would defeat the purpose i guess bc they wouldnt do or say anything that i wouldnt wanna hear

...maybe i shouldnt tell them the first week and then tell them once i see what goes on?..ok im rambling now. sorry lol.

Sounds like you want the camara to hear the conversations between the nanny and your MIL more than to see how is she with your kid

 

[sba771]

I would double check but I am pretty sure recording sound in NYC is illegal, so I would consult someone about that first.

 

[monarch64]

Hahaha, you''ve seen the Nanny Diaries (or read it), right? If not, rent the DVD.

 

[brooklyngirl]

Date: 7/22/2009 5:19:41 PM
Author: nycbkgirl

true ...i was just going to elaborate what i forgot to mention.....i dont think nanny would ever be alone in the house (not for more than an hr at most but that might be way down the line if ever) but my point is MIL isnt one of my favorite ppl (as many of u already know lol) i really want a nanny cam for the sound and to see if they are doing what i want them to be doing with the kids. i want my nanny to be listening to me and not MIL bc MIL likes to do things her way (even tho i tell her off) but when im not around then she does what SHE wants and a nanny cam will help me see what goes on. so, its not really for worries of abusing the children, more of making sure my kids are taken care of the way I want them to be ..am i making sense

..so telling them would defeat the purpose i guess bc they wouldnt do or say anything that i wouldnt wanna hear

...maybe i shouldnt tell them the first week and then tell them once i see what goes on?..ok im rambling now. sorry lol.

Erm... I do not recommend this. If you are going to do this just have a nanny and tell MIL that her services are no longer needed. As much as you want to know what's going on and what she's saying this rubs the wrong way. It's especially bad if they don't know they're being taped. I don't think you want to go this route.

If the nanny is primarily responsible for the kids and MIL comes over here and there to help with them, that's one thing. But if she's always there, videotaping is not looking to hot to me. Sorry

ETA: What I said before still applies... your primary concern is that the twinks are being cared for the way you specified.

The logic for this goes back to why they are in your life right now in the first place, and it's because of the kids. If it doesn't apply to the kids, it doesn't concern you. So, whatever she has to say about you, does not concern you as long as she is taking care of your children the way you specified.

 

[Lorelei]

Maybe it might be best just to have a nanny rather than MIL, it might make it easier in case MIL tries to do everything with the children and make the nanny redundant? Also if MIL is determined things are done her way, the it could be difficult for the nanny, after all you are paying for a trained professional to care for your children the way YOU want them cared for, MIL could make this difficult as it sounds as if she is pretty set in her ways.

 

[nycbkgirl]

Gaby-i agree the nanny SHOULD be smart and lovely but i dont know her personally and ppl are one way when they want u to hire them and another when they are already hired. so it would be nice to see how nice she really is ...some ppl show their true colors when no one is watching..and my kids wont be able to tell me of course...MIL will be watching im sure but maybe she will be in another room etc. i do want to make sure MIL isnt bossing her around or insisting she do things a different way..so yes that would entail listening to their conversations...bc they wont be talking about personal business as they do not know eachother and MIL doesnt like most ppl anyway

SBA- i did check it out and it seems in nyc it is legal to record sound as well.

Monarch- i did see it

BKGIRL- even tho u know me so well

...my motive is not listening to what they say about ME lol...sure it would be an added bonus (j/k) my motive is to hear and see all the happening with the kids...sight and sound! it is ALL about the kids....as u know i dont care at all what she has to say about me (and im sure its all very nice and wonderful

)

Lorelei- i wish i could get rid of MIL but i have 2 kiddos and even tho this nanny isnt afraid to tackle 2 at a time, I am ...my girl is up all day long and needs to be tended to all the time...so u really need 2 ppl there and me being with nanny would defeat the purpose. even tho i cant stand MIL, she does care for the kids bc she loves them and only has their best interests at heart. DH and I werent speaking to my in-laws for 2 yrs and i decided that i couldnt deprive my kids of knowing them so we mended ties...i wont make that decision on my kids behalf and will never talk or say bad things about them. so even tho id get rid of her in an instant...she is a big help and is spending time with them (so we are both helping eachother out in a sense). we just have lots of differing opinions about raising kids and she doesnt care for my "ways"...thats what makes my blood boil....there are just so many things ..i would need a whole thread to vent about

 

[lucyandroger]

Oh, gosh...I do not think you should use cameras to spy on your MIL during the day. Is your plan to confront your MIL with the video afterwards? If so, I think you should be prepared to make do without her because I know for sure I would be out the door in two seconds if I were her. Can''t you just sit down with her and have a conversation about it?

 

[swingirl]

Date: 7/22/2009 5:19:41 PM
Author: nycbkgirl

Date: 7/22/2009 4:58:10 PM

Author: swingirl

You want the nanny to help your MIL. Wouldn't the MIL be there observing the nanny anyway?

true ...i was just going to elaborate what i forgot to mention.....i dont think nanny would ever be alone in the house (not for more than an hr at most but that might be way down the line if ever) but my point is MIL isnt one of my favorite ppl (as many of u already know lol) i really want a nanny cam for the sound and to see if they are doing what i want them to be doing with the kids. i want my nanny to be listening to me and not MIL bc MIL likes to do things her way (even tho i tell her off) but when im not around then she does what SHE wants and a nanny cam will help me see what goes on. so, its not really for worries of abusing the children, more of making sure my kids are taken care of the way I want them to be ..am i making sense

..so telling them would defeat the purpose i guess bc they wouldnt do or say anything that i wouldnt wanna hear

...maybe i shouldnt tell them the first week and then tell them once i see what goes on?..ok im rambling now. sorry lol.

You would be putting your nanny in an awful position by knowing she is going to have a conflict between your instructions and your MIL's instructions and she has to work with your MIL everyday. But it really sounds like you want a MIL Cam more than a Nanny Cam. I predict trouble ahead because the real problem is with your MIL. If you are not comfortable with your MIL's care than stand up for your kids and get rid of her. Don't use a nanny to fight the MIL battle.

 

[Bia]

Date: 7/22/2009 7:34:33 PM
Author: swingirl

Date: 7/22/2009 5:19:41 PM

Author: nycbkgirl

Date: 7/22/2009 4:58:10 PM

Author: swingirl

You want the nanny to help your MIL. Wouldn''t the MIL be there observing the nanny anyway?

true ...i was just going to elaborate what i forgot to mention.....i dont think nanny would ever be alone in the house (not for more than an hr at most but that might be way down the line if ever) but my point is MIL isnt one of my favorite ppl (as many of u already know lol) i really want a nanny cam for the sound and to see if they are doing what i want them to be doing with the kids. i want my nanny to be listening to me and not MIL bc MIL likes to do things her way (even tho i tell her off) but when im not around then she does what SHE wants and a nanny cam will help me see what goes on. so, its not really for worries of abusing the children, more of making sure my kids are taken care of the way I want them to be ..am i making sense

..so telling them would defeat the purpose i guess bc they wouldnt do or say anything that i wouldnt wanna hear

...maybe i shouldnt tell them the first week and then tell them once i see what goes on?..ok im rambling now. sorry lol.

You would be putting your nanny in an awful position by knowing she is going to have a conflict between your instructions and your MIL''s instructions and she has to work with your MIL everyday. But it really sounds like you want a MIL Cam more than a Nanny Cam. I predict trouble ahead because the real problem is with your MIL. If you are not comfortable with your MIL''s care than stand up for your kids and get rid of her. Don''t use a nanny to fight the MIL battle.

Don''t recommend a MIL Cam...no no no. Not a good idea. And I agree that could put your nanny in an uncomfortable spot, especially if your MIL is not an easy-going personality.

 

[nycbkgirl]

nonono if i wanted a MIL cam i wouldve gotten one a looong time ago lol....i dont care what my MIL says about me ..i know she loves the kids and takes care of them (just doesnt like the way i do) but point is i dont need to spy on MIL ....the point is i want to see how things would be with the nanny in the picture..oh and i would never confront nanny or MIL if i would see smthg i didnt like...for example if MIL told her to do smthg and she did it i would next time see what she does with my own eyes and make it a point that i want this done X way etc. i would never start any trouble with MIL either...we have a hate hate relationship and anything negative she would have to say about me...i wouldnt be surprised lol.

...sooo what we all are trying to say is that this is a bad idea huh??

 

[Miranda]

I know you''re looking for camera recs, but, I thought I''d offer a more simple solution. Stay home with the kids? That way you are 100% positive the kiddos are taken care of the way you woud like. I think it would be much more satisfying than spying during the day. Problem solved.

 

[brooklyngirl]

Well, ok, based on your last post, there''s no need for a nanny/MIL cam if you''re not really going to use the footage, until you see something in the footage IRL.

I hate to say it, but if that''s the case, save your money, or better yet TAKE IT TO BLISS

, and have yourself a fabulous facial!

In closing, BAD IDEA, lol.

Make no mistake that that nanny is going to be ripping her hair out after a week of hanging with MIL. Perhaps you can sit both of them down on the nanny''s first day of duty, and make it clear as to what exactly is expected of them. Namely, that the nanny will follow your instructions to the letter, and you do not appreciate MIL asking her to do otherwise. Make sure the nanny know that this is a critical part of her job, and if there are any issues to let you know. This way, they will be watching each other.

 

[nycbkgirl]

Mir- thanks for the suggestion...lets just say if I could I would.

..my situation is more complicated than that..sis n I have a business and I have basically been out of commission since I got pg and sis works alone and I started goin 2 work 2xa week once I could (mil didntwork @ that time) now she works so is only @our house til 1pm so I really can''t work bc I gotta be there with kids after 1...dh works nites so I have no help there either...no time for anything. The fact is I need a nanny but our fam has never had one and I worry...im so stressed having my babies being taken care of by a stranger but it has to be done bc I can''t take care of kids all day and nite and work, clean n cook,

Does anyone have a nanny?

 

[sparklyheart]

This is interesting because I just a conversation with a friend about nannycams. She was a nanny in the past and was never told about the cameras. She was trying to put on a movie and found the nannycam channel where she could see what the cameras saw. It scared the crap out of her! She left her job because she was so uncomfortable knowing that they were "spying" on her. She wasn''t doing anything wrong and they never had a problem with her, but they also failed to mention the camera situation. I know parents are concerned about safety but that seems so shady to me if you are watching people without them knowing. I would be creeped out just going to a friend''s house and then finding out they had been taping my every move.

It sounds like you need to have the nanny do the babysitting and the MIL do her own thing outside of your house!

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/22/2009 9:02:39 PM
Author: brooklyngirl
Well, ok, based on your last post, there''s no need for a nanny/MIL cam if you''re not really going to use the footage, until you see something in the footage IRL.

I hate to say it, but if that''s the case, save your money, or better yet TAKE IT TO BLISS

, and have yourself a fabulous facial!

In closing, BAD IDEA, lol.

Make no mistake that that nanny is going to be ripping her hair out after a week of hanging with MIL. Perhaps you can sit both of them down on the nanny''s first day of duty, and make it clear as to what exactly is expected of them. Namely, that the nanny will follow your instructions to the letter, and you do not appreciate MIL asking her to do otherwise. Make sure the nanny know that this is a critical part of her job, and if there are any issues to let you know. This way, they will be watching each other.

1) ?...it will be used but in a constructive way...i wont go and tell them off etc but i will make it a point to change something i didnt like.

2) i cant go w/o U

3) o u are sooooo right!!!

4) i was thinking that too

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/22/2009 9:54:32 PM
Author: sparklyheart
This is interesting because I just a conversation with a friend about nannycams. She was a nanny in the past and was never told about the cameras. She was trying to put on a movie and found the nannycam channel where she could see what the cameras saw. It scared the crap out of her! She left her job because she was so uncomfortable knowing that they were ''spying'' on her. She wasn''t doing anything wrong and they never had a problem with her, but they also failed to mention the camera situation. I know parents are concerned about safety but that seems so shady to me if you are watching people without them knowing. I would be creeped out just going to a friend''s house and then finding out they had been taping my every move.

It sounds like you need to have the nanny do the babysitting and the MIL do her own thing outside of your house!

point well taken...that of course is the perspective of a nanny..i wish we had a parent who has a nanny cam give their perspective as well. if i were a nanny...i would def feel the same way as your friend...as a parent i must say that your babies are the most valuable thing in your life and having a strange person taking care of them (esp if nanny is alone with child) is the scariest thing imaginable. i personally wouldnt have a nanny alone with my kids but some ppl dont have a choice and i totally understand the need of a nannycam. whether or not the nanny should be told about it ...im not sure about that yet bc there are good reasons for both opinions on that issue.