New to Diamond Buying - Engagement Ring Help

[sirwilliam303]

Hi everyone,

Hopefully this is the correct place to post this...

My girlfriend and I have been together for almost two years and are looking to take the next step. I do not plan on asking her within the next month or two, so I have some more time to keep looking for rings. She told me she likes the three-stone engagement rings with side stones or a neat design on the sides, but the center stone should be 1 carat (most we looked at had a 1 carat total weight, spread between all of the miniature and two other main stones).

I would like to get her an amazing ring, but I do not have as big of a budget as some other people might. I am looking to spend not more than $4000-5000 on a ring. Of course, if I could get a ring I think she would like with a large enough center stone (I read 0.9c is cheaper and the size difference is negligent) for less, that would be fine, too

I know at least basic knowledge about the 4 C's but I do have questions.

1. Is it safe to purchase a diamond online? I do not get to see it until I have it in my possession, and then I need to bring it to an appraiser and hope it is what I purchased.

2. If I purchase a diamond separately, how do I know what setting it would fit into? Who do I bring the diamond (and setting, potentially) to, to have it put together? How much does this cost?

3. Since this is all new to me, what are the steps I need to take from here? As in, do I find a diamond and call the vendor and see if I can have it shipped to me and appraised locally before I purchase it, or is this very uncommon? What if it gets lost in the mail on the way to me, or if I need to send it back, it gets lost?

I am sure I have other questions, but this is a good start. I plan on updating this post with new questions as they arise from any help I am given, so please check back

Thank you very much for your help!

 

[stargurl78]

You will find that most of us around here highly recommend buying a diamond online. There are many trusted vendors that are often recommended - Brian Gavin Diamonds, Whiteflash, Good Old Gold, James Allen, Diamonds by Lauren, ID Jewelry, etc.

Normally you will pick a diamond and then have it set by the same vendor. Or you can purchase the diamond from one vendor and send it to another vendor to be set if the stone and setting that you choose are sold by different vendors. However, if you choose to do that you will be responsible for insurance and shipping costs. You won't want to ship it without insurance in case it gets lost or stolen. So if you can find both the stone and the setting in the same place, it will make things easier for you.

The vendor know what setting it will fit into because you will have the measurements of the stone from the report (this is why you should choose a stone before you pick a setting). Only look at stones graded by GIA or AGS.

I honestly think you might have a hard time finding a 1 ct stone with the setting you describe for under $5k.

Gabriel & Co has quite a few 3-stone settings and they are reasonably priced (you can usually assume about 20% off of the price listed on the Gabriel website). Good Old Gold and ID Jewelry both carry their settings:
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/styles/1?category=ER&style=3+Stone

What about this setting (assuming 20% markdown at $1260):
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER7296W44JJ

With this stone (0.85 ct I VS2 - wire price $4252):
http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/9708/

This setting is pretty too if she likes antique-style settings:
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER7290W44JJ

Or you could contact ID Jewelry and ask them to help you find a stone within your budget. They sell Gabriel settings and they seem to be able to work miracles for people looking for something specific within a budget.

ETA: Fix link error

 

[sirwilliam303]

You will find that most of us around here highly recommend buying a diamond online. There are many trusted vendors that are often recommended - Brian Gavin Diamonds, Whiteflash, Good Old Gold, James Allen, Diamonds by Lauren, ID Jewelry, etc.

Ok, that is good to know, thanks

Normally you will pick a diamond and then have it set by the same vendor. Or you can purchase the diamond from one vendor and send it to another vendor to be set if the stone and setting that you choose are sold by different vendors. However, if you choose to do that you will be responsible for insurance and shipping costs. You won't want to ship it without insurance in case it gets lost or stolen. So if you can find both the stone and the setting in the same place, it will make things easier for you.

Ok, that does make sense and would be easier and probably less stressful for me, too.

The vendor know what setting it will fit into because you will have the measurements of the stone from the report (this is why you should choose a stone before you pick a setting). Only look at stones graded by GIA or AGS.

I honestly think you might have a hard time finding a 1 ct stone with the setting you describe for under $5k.

Yeah, I figured that may be the case... but I will still try, as we are saving up for a house, too, so the money is stressful.

Gabriel & Co has quite a few 3-stone settings and they are reasonably priced (you can usually assume about 20% off of the price listed on the Gabriel website). Good Old Gold and ID Jewelry both carry their settings:
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/styles/1?category=ER&style=3+Stone

What about this setting (assuming 20% markdown at $1260):
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER7296W44JJ

With this stone (wire price $4252):
http://www.goodoldgold.com/diamond/9708/

This setting is pretty too if she likes antique-style settings:
http://www.gabrielny.com/engaged/style/ER7290W44JJ

What do you mean I can assume about 20% off of the price listed, is it because they usually have deals going on, or is there some other reason?
The diamond you linked looks nice (based on its stats and pictures) but the setting holds a 6.5 mm stone but the diamond is slightly smaller. Is this alright, because it could always be set to a smaller diamond? I am not sure of the whole fitting the setting and diamond together process.

Or you could contact ID Jewelry and ask them to help you find a stone within your budget. They sell Gabriel settings and they seem to be able to work miracles for people looking for something specific within a budget.

This is another good tip, thank you, I will look into this one, too.

This was very helpful... thank you very much for your help and I will look into what you said!

 

[distracts]

You're not going to be able to do a three-stone with a 1 ct center stone with your budget. Probably not even with a 0.9 ct center stone. I wouldn't recommend the compromises necessary to make it happen.

 

[stargurl78]

No problem!

It seems like once you work with IDJ or GOG for the setting, the actual cost is about 20% less than what is actually listed on the Gabriel website. I'm not really sure why though...

I think that Gabriel and Co has their settings made for multiple sizes of center stones. If they made that setting for a 6.0 mm stone as well, I think that would work better and might cost less as well (although the one made for a 6.5mm might work too). However, those questions could be asked of whatever vendor you decided to work with. There were previously 2 of their settings that I was considering for a colored stone and they made both of them for 6.0 and 6.5mm stones.

I definitely understand about having to buy a house and being tight on funds. You just might have to go a tad smaller than you planned. But I think you should be able to get around an 0.85 carat center stone, which is still a great size. You might be able to go larger if you are willing to sacrifice color or clarity, but I don't think I would go below I color or SI1 clarity for an engagement ring. However, many people are fine with lower colored stones but I wouldn't risk it unless you are sure that your gf isn't color sensitive.

If you like either of the settings that I recommended (or any other from the Gabriel site), I would definitely recommend contacting GOG and putting that stone on hold. I honestly don't think you're going to be able to do much better than that.

 

[Gypsy]

I think maybe you should talk to her about a solitaire for now, and upgrade the setting to a three stone later (after you buy the house).

20% off is what PS vendors offer PS members on those settings.

Call Yekutiel at ID Jewelry. He is GREAT at working with challenging budgets. Tell him you want a GIA EX/EX with a J color, eyeclean center stone of 90 points or larger in a three stone setting for 5k and see what he proposes back. If you buy both the setting and the stone from him he can get you a better deal out the door. He is who I would call, if it were me with these restraints.

 

[sirwilliam303]

You're not going to be able to do a three-stone with a 1 ct center stone with your budget. Probably not even with a 0.9 ct center stone. I wouldn't recommend the compromises necessary to make it happen.

I read somewhere that even a G color or SI1 clarity is still "good" (although, I may not have read that on pricescope... I've done a lot of reading ). Is this accurate? I mean, of course what is good to one person may not be good to another, but generally speaking, is the difference between an F and a G that noticeable?

On that note, I do want to go to local retailers just to see some real diamonds in person and learn more about them, even if I choose not to get one through those companies. That would probably help me "see" the diamonds that are for sale online better.

I think that Gabriel and Co has their settings made for multiple sizes of center stones. If they made that setting for a 6.0 mm stone as well, I think that would work better and might cost less as well (although the one made for a 6.5mm might work too). However, those questions could be asked of whatever vendor you decided to work with. There were previously 2 of their settings that I was considering for a colored stone and they made both of them for 6.0 and 6.5mm stones.

Ok, that makes sense. I will ask the vendor when I call.

I definitely understand about having to buy a house and being tight on funds. You just might have to go a tad smaller than you planned. But I think you should be able to get around an 0.85 carat center stone, which is still a great size. You might be able to go larger if you are willing to sacrifice color or clarity, but I don't think I would go below I color or SI1 clarity for an engagement ring. However, many people are fine with lower colored stones but I wouldn't risk it unless you are sure that your gf isn't color sensitive.

I will have to ask her opinion on color, but that might need to be after seeing some in person at a local store before she knows, either.

If you like either of the settings that I recommended (or any other from the Gabriel site), I would definitely recommend contacting GOG and putting that stone on hold. I honestly don't think you're going to be able to do much better than that.

and

Call Yekutiel at ID Jewelry. He is GREAT at working with challenging budgets. Tell him you want a GIA EX/EX with a J color, eyeclean center stone of 90 points or larger in a three stone setting for 5k and see what he proposes back. If you buy both the setting and the stone from him he can get you a better deal out the door. He is who I would call, if it were me with these restraints.

I did browse both the GOG and ID sites and I think I will start with ID since two people have recommended it, and I did see a setting that I liked more than others (well, and I believe she would really like it, too, which is probably more important )

I think maybe you should talk to her about a solitaire for now, and upgrade the setting to a three stone later (after you buy the house).

I had asked her if I could get her a smaller center stone and upgrade it later but she said she would rather not replace pieces of the ring as it would not be the original anymore. So the same is probably true of the setting, too.

20% off is what PS vendors offer PS members on those settings.

Oh, well there is the answer to the 20% off stargurl78

Thanks again everyone! I am going to request she visit a jewelry store with me so she can see some diamonds in person and we can go from there, now that I have some more information, and hopefully I will have more information regarding her opinions tonight

 

[JulieN]

How are your finances in the future? If you will have more money later, you can get a solitaire then upgrade. Of course, 5000 is a very nice budget and if you won't be able to upgrade later, there is nothing wrong with that.

You should be looking at I/J SI. If she really wants a carat and is ok with J/K color, I think that is also a fine choice!

 

[mandasand]

I agree with Gypsy to call ID Jewelry and give him your budget. They also carry Gabriel settings. I would not go with GOG on this one, just because I don't think you'll be able to get the size you want. If you are spending $4200 on the stone, that doesn't leave enough for a 3-stone settings. Also, the 20% comes into play with Gabriel settings if you buy the stone and setting at the same place, you can usually get 20% off the setting. It's not a PS thing to my knowledge. ALL Gabriel settings are made to fit your diamond, so don't worry about the size. The jeweler should order the setting to fit your stone and ring size.

ID also has other 3-stone settings...here's an ex:
http://idjewelryonline.com/product_info.php?cPath=42_43&products_id=10038&cType=ER

 

[JulieN]

Ok, here are my picks: http://www.jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds-search/?View=4&Tab=3&Comparison=1392283,1520348,1529391,1534170,1534180,1534333,1542769

And 1520348 is supposedly a Hearts on Fire. It has a great picture.

They are all above 1 ct, around 4000. I didn't include I clarity. I picked a lot in case a few aren't eye-clean.

If that doesn't leave enough for a setting, you can drop to .9 cts.

 

[sirwilliam303]

How are your finances in the future? If you will have more money later, you can get a solitaire then upgrade. Of course, 5000 is a very nice budget and if you won't be able to upgrade later, there is nothing wrong with that.

You should be looking at I/J SI. If she really wants a carat and is ok with J/K color, I think that is also a fine choice!

We are saving for a house so we are trying to spend as little as possible for things and throw as much as we can into savings I hope to get at least a few hundred dollar/year raise at the beginning of next year (maybe a thousand? ) and I think I am on the right path to someday, perhaps in a few years, get a promotion if I keep doing well at work. As of right now though, we are not rich by any standards and will barely be able to afford a house in our timeline (if at all, we may have to wait a little longer than we wanted).

We are going to a jewelry store tonight, so hopefully they have a few diamonds of different colors, clarities, and such for us to look at so I can see how she feels about each "C".

Thanks

I agree with Gypsy to call ID Jewelry and give him your budget. They also carry Gabriel settings. I would not go with GOG on this one, just because I don't think you'll be able to get the size you want. If you are spending $4200 on the stone, that doesn't leave enough for a 3-stone settings. Also, the 20% comes into play with Gabriel settings if you buy the stone and setting at the same place, you can usually get 20% off the setting. It's not a PS thing to my knowledge. ALL Gabriel settings are made to fit your diamond, so don't worry about the size. The jeweler should order the setting to fit your stone and ring size.

ID also has other 3-stone settings...here's an ex:
http://idjewelryonline.com/product_info.php?cPath=42_43&products_id=10038&cType=ER

I am definitely going to try ID Jewelry first and see how it goes. That is good to know that the settings are made to fit the diamond, I am glad it won't be a "well it mostly fits inside of a x-size ring" thing

That link you gave is actually the setting I was refering to in my last post, nice taste I think she would really like this one because it has a few smaller stones and the design on the side is interesting

 

[sirwilliam303]

Ok, here are my picks: http://www.jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds-search/?View=4&Tab=3&Comparison=1392283,1520348,1529391,1534170,1534180,1534333,1542769

And 1520348 is supposedly a Hearts on Fire. It has a great picture.

They are all above 1 ct, around 4000. I didn't include I clarity. I picked a lot in case a few aren't eye-clean.

If that doesn't leave enough for a setting, you can drop to .9 cts.

Oops, good timing, I was posting while you posted this

Those are nice diamonds. Are those the actual diamonds' pictures? I was under the impression they were just samples. Oops

There was a 700 dollar setting she said she liked from James Allen, so those could be an option. Thanks!

 

[JulieN]

Yes, they are all actual pictures. James Allen's gemologist will look at them for you, can give you opinions about the color and inclusions, and also will provide 3 Ideal Scope pictures.

 

[distracts]

Ok, here are my picks: http://www.jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds-search/?View=4&Tab=3&Comparison=1392283,1520348,1529391,1534170,1534180,1534333,1542769

And 1520348 is supposedly a Hearts on Fire. It has a great picture.

They are all above 1 ct, around 4000. I didn't include I clarity. I picked a lot in case a few aren't eye-clean.

If that doesn't leave enough for a setting, you can drop to .9 cts.

Oooh, and with his budget, he could get this setting which is beautiful: http://www.jamesallen.com/engagement-rings/settings-with-sidestones/18k-white-gold-three-stone-diamond-engagement-ring-with-scroll-undergallery-17929w.html and stay very close to budget!

 

[JulieN]

distracts, I had not seen that one before, but it is very pretty!

 

[distracts]

distracts, I had not seen that one before, but it is very pretty!

It's stupidly not in the three-stone section but in the sidestones section. *shrug* I like the swirly bits in the gallery. Looks like it'll sit nicely with a wedding band too. And in plat it's less than 2k!

 

[sirwilliam303]

That is a really pretty setting. I think she would like that even though it does not have the side stones. Thanks for even more options!

 

[stargurl78]

Ok, here are my picks: http://www.jamesallen.com/loose-diamonds-search/?View=4&Tab=3&Comparison=1392283,1520348,1529391,1534170,1534180,1534333,1542769

And 1520348 is supposedly a Hearts on Fire. It has a great picture.

They are all above 1 ct, around 4000. I didn't include I clarity. I picked a lot in case a few aren't eye-clean.

If that doesn't leave enough for a setting, you can drop to .9 cts.

Oooh, and with his budget, he could get this setting which is beautiful: http://www.jamesallen.com/engagement-rings/settings-with-sidestones/18k-white-gold-three-stone-diamond-engagement-ring-with-scroll-undergallery-17929w.html and stay very close to budget!

That setting is gorgeous! I didn't see that one in my search earlier, I don't know why they wouldn't put that in the 3-stone section

Also, I think if the sidestones in that setting are G-H color, a J/K center stone is going to show some tint. Just my 2 cents though...

 

[sirwilliam303]

Hi again everyone

My girlfriend and I finally got to go to a jewelry store yesterday. We asked to see a few diamond rings just to get an idea what the C's looked like in person. The guy was very helpful and told me about an event next week where they will have loose diamonds in store (since usually they do not) and have a 25% off sale (it looks like its just on mountings and semi-mounts... does this mean the labor for putting the diamond in the setting, or does mounting mean setting?).

I think I will do, although I am not sure if I will go through with the purchase just yet. I suppose it depends on if I find one I really like (and that she will really like ) that is not out of my price range.

That said, she really like the way the light reflected off of the SI stone we saw (especially when compared to an I3). The colors he showed us were just G-H I believe, so I am guessing within that range would be perfectly fine for her.

I am curious what types of questions I should ask the jewelers, both at the store when I go and when I call ID Jewelry. Perhaps there are different questions, as I am able to see the diamond at the store, but not through the phone.

I just want to make sure I do not miss an important question in the excitement.

Thank you again for everyone who has helped so far and whomever might help from here. It means a lot