No jeweller will set our stone.

[NexivRed]

Hi all.

My partner purchased an engagement stone we both love quite a while ago, and timing and finances have finally meant we can set it.

However, every custom jeweller he’s approached here in the U.K. has turned him down citing insurance issues.
They state they can craft us a ring and set a stone they have sourced and we choose, and have sent many examples of work we’re both happy with, and lovely gemstones. But I’ve never heard of being turned down due to us owning the stone beforehand?

It’s a trillion cut demantoid from the Ural mountains. I know they’re not super easy to find in a decent medium green, but I don’t think it’s a super rare stone. It’s not massive or anything.


We’re reluctant to send it abroad because of the cost of export and import tax. We’d much rather use our budget on the ring. But at this point I don’t want to be left with just a loose stone.

Can anyone offer any insight? Thank you.


Vendor pics and one on my hand for eye candy I adore this stone. The fire on it in sunlight is amazing.

 

[chrono]

You can either procure your own insurance during the setting process to cover any damages incurred and/or accept /sign a waiver that you will not hold the bench responsible for any damage occurred during the setting process.

This is also common in the USA for diamonds and coloured stones.

 

[fredflintstone]

Many jewelers will not set a stone not bought through their store. Especially rare stones that are relatively soft like Demantoid.

The reason being that they are not insured against breakage of stones that are set but not sold by them. This means if they break the stone setting it, they either must find you a replacement stone which is much more time consuming than most think and pay for it too, or pay you the cost of your stone, which would be higher than their cost.

There are plenty of online jeweler designers/jewelers that specialize in colored gemstones that would do it, but that might mean sending the stone out of the country to be set. They also might want you to sign a breakage agreement to protect them if the stone breaks under the pressure of setting it.

It is possible that some of these jewelers might set the stone if you sign an breakage agreement to hold them not responsible you have talked to.

 

[T L]

I cannot believe there’s not a single jeweler in the entire United Kingdom that won’t set your stone. I hope someone from the UK can make recommendations. London area has to have someone!!

Just make sure it’s someone who can set softer stones. I would look to get custom V-tip prongs to securely hold and protect those pointy corners. Lovely clean and well cut stone!!! How large is it if you don’t mind me asking.

 

[Autumn in New England]

I don't have any insight for you unfortunately, @NexivRed, as I'm in the US. But I just wanted to say congrats on your impending nuptials! Beautiful stone... good luck!!

 

[NexivRed]

Thank you for the advice. T L, I would hope we haven’t exhausted all of them either, but I’m letting my partner take the lead, and these are his findings so far.

I mention about a damage waiver and he said he’d asked them but received a no.

We were looking into a complete bevel setting with some millgrain for the setting, to protect the stone. It’s about 6.5 x 7.5mm. Around a carat and a half I believe.

 

[dk168]

Try contacting Simon Wright in London as he set my 1.94ct MRB in a bangle bracelet in 2020.

DK

 

[T L]

Thank you for the advice. T L, I would hope we haven’t exhausted all of them either, but I’m letting my partner take the lead, and these are his findings so far.

I mention about a damage waiver and he said he’d asked them but received a no.

We were looking into a complete bevel setting with some millgrain for the setting, to protect the stone. It’s about 6.5 x 7.5mm. Around a carat and a half I believe.

I would never do a bezel on a soft stone unless it was a top notch expert in workmanship and setting soft stones. Bezels can easily damage the gem, and they’re often poorly done.

Set it low, maybe in a protective metal or stone halo.

That could be why no one will set it….

 

[NexivRed]

Thank you DK, I will pass that on to my partner.

T L, a bezel wouldn’t be my first choice for sure. I was just preparing myself for a jeweller to tell me that I’d be mad to try any other setting style. So that could be good news.


I’m sort of half preparing myself for having to change the stone completely. It’s just not an obstacle I was prepared for. I thought money would be the main one lol.

 

[T L]

That's a nice size demantoid by the way. I do hope you set it one day, it deserves it. Good luck!

 

[seaurchin]

To play devil's advocate for a sec, maybe you'd be better off to start over with a different stone anyway.

If my quick google search is correct, garnet is 6.5-7.5 on the MOHS scale and demantoid is on the lower end of that. That seems soft for daily wear.

My next thought would be so what if the stone did need to be replaced later? And I think it would be difficult to do. A bezel setting would be destroyed. And even if it was prong set, I don't think a trillion is a common enough shape that it could be easily replaced with a different stone. Just my two coppers.

 

[NexivRed]

Yes, we did go back and forth on the demantoid a bit. I think it’s only because my physical disabilities and autism mean I’m basically confined to one room 24/7. I do almost everything from my bed, don’t work full time, and should I need to do anything like shower or clean out my animals, I can remove it.

I can see it being a pain for someone out and about and leading a normal life for sure, but it would be automatically “babied” for most of the day on my hand.


As an alternative stone, we are looking at brown diamonds. An odd choice you might think Well I’m a pretty odd person. Very much a fan of the unusual, and it would actually actually allow me to afford a decent sized stone in one of my most favourite cuts; step or asscher. Might have to be a route we explore.
Salt and peppers also caught my eye, but the limited type of cuts I’ve seen them in put me off slightly. And I do think I would miss a sparkle.

 

[T L]

There are olive green diamonds too that are quite affordable. I really do love the demantoid though and I’m hoping you’ll set it.

 

[NexivRed]

There are olive green diamonds too that are quite affordable. I really do love the demantoid though and I’m hoping you’ll set it.

I am willing to wait longer to save up more so my partner isn’t forced to sell it to help fund another stone.

I don’t think he’d ever put as much effort into anything in his life than finding that stone lol. And that is why it means so much to me Hopefully we will find a jeweller that has a workable plan for it!

 

[Soseattle]

I really like trillion cut stones as well as nice demantoids. I think your stone is stunning! If the stone as an engagement ring will fit with your lifestyle, then I say go for it if that's what you really want to do. Nothing worth doing is easy. I know things like this can be frustrating. I wish I could help more, but I'm in the U.S. I wish you the best on your search and engagement.

 

[MissyBeaucoup]

I also was cautioned away from a bezel setting because of the potential stress on a stone. I thought it would be protectIve, so that surprised me. I love your beautiful, unique demantoid. Congratulations!!

 

[Starstruck8]

What a beautiful stone!

I have had two demantoids bezel set, but they were not 'outside' stones. The risk is not actually great. But, as others have said, the jewellers won't be insured and finding a replacement will be hard, so they won't be keen on the financial risk, the hassle or the possible bad feelings. I'm in Australia, so I can't help. I'd be surprised if there were not a coloured stone specialist prepared to do it, if you made it really clear that you understood the issues.

Demantoid is a beautiful stone. As others have said, it is not usually recommended for everyday wearing rings. But if it's what you want, and you understand the issues, go for it.

 

[LilAlex]

I also was cautioned away from a bezel setting because of the potential stress on a stone. I thought it would be protectIve, so that surprised me.

You are right that they are protective. It's the getting-the-gem-inside-that-protection part that is tricky and may involve hammering, etc.

Our local B&M place has bezel-set a number of stones for us, but not a tiny sapphire with a paper-thin girdle and fingerprints extending out to it. They flat-out refused, even at my risk. Makes perfect sense to me now but back then I thought they were just being difficult.

 

[Bron357]

Sigh, been there.
Some jewellers are snobby, like they are doing you a favour taking your money.
Jewellers like to make a profit on every aspect of the ring process and they can be very “anti” any online purchase being given to them to set!
And there is an insurance issue. Occasionally gems chip while setting, that don’t want you being angry / upset if that happens.
My tip, tell them this is an family inherited stone from your late grandma / mother / favourite aunt and that’s why you have it and why it’s special.
Then say, I realise that any risks with setting this gem are mine and that’s ok with me.
A decent jeweller will take on the task, but it will be at your risk if any damage occurs.
Another possible source is to go to an Antique jeweller and politely ask who does their repairs etc. Explain about the family stone etc etc. A good antique jeweller seller has to have a good bench for repairs.

 

[JewelledEscalators]

Oh no, will I have this problem too!?

 

[JewelledEscalators]

Did you try jewellers in Hatton Garden also? Did they turn you down too?

 

[seaurchin]

Tbh I understand why a jeweler might not want to get involved. Regardless of what a customer says or signs, that doesn't stop them from possibly getting angry, thinking there was some special circumstance, leaving bad reviews or suing if their beloved stone actually is destroyed.

 

[JewelledEscalators]

BTW, I don't think you need to pay import and export tax to get work done overseas do you, as you're not buying or selling the item. Or at least you are just paying charges on the cost of the work itself rather than the value of the item?

 

[VividRed]

BTW, I don't think you need to pay import and export tax to get work done overseas do you, as you're not buying or selling the item. Or at least you are just paying charges on the cost of the work itself rather than the value of the item?

You most certainly do pay import duties, even for a temporary stay of the goods. The only way to avoid this is declaring a very low value (that’s what I do but I do NOT recommend it) or going through a very lengthy clearance process to get the import duties refunded, assuming the country in question allows for this.

 

[JewelledEscalators]

Ah. Thanks for the info!

 

[qubitasaurus]

This UK jeweler sets softer stones, Im not sure whether they'll take a customer stone as I haven't used them personally.

williamwhite - Etsy Singapore

Shop Contemporary & Handmade Jewelry from Cornwall England by williamwhite located in Penryn, United Kingdom. Smooth dispatch! Has a history of dispatching on time with tracking. Speedy replies! Has a history of replying to messages quickly. Rave reviews! Average review rating is 4.8 or higher

www.etsy.com

I think if the stone gets damaged during setting then this is not something the jeweler is likely to cover. I'm afraid they only typically have insurance to cover stones they source themselves. So it's very atypical for them to cover damage to an outside stone.

Only thing I'd note is I'd try to avoid a bezel as you might want to repolish the stone later. And I'd be trying to put something protective (build the setting up) arround the corners which will be prone to chipping.

 

[NexivRed]

Thank you for continued replies and advice. I will pass this all onto my other half.

What a beautiful stone!

I have had two demantoids bezel set, but they were not 'outside' stones. The risk is not actually great. But, as others have said, the jewellers won't be insured and finding a replacement will be hard, so they won't be keen on the financial risk, the hassle or the possible bad feelings. I'm in Australia, so I can't help. I'd be surprised if there were not a coloured stone specialist prepared to do it, if you made it really clear that you understood the issues.

Demantoid is a beautiful stone. As others have said, it is not usually recommended for everyday wearing rings. But if it's what you want, and you understand the issues, go for it.

Absolutely gorgeous ring. Those colours set each other off perfectly.

Did you try jewellers in Hatton Garden also? Did they turn you down too?

I will ask him if he’s contacted them. I think so far he’s kept to smaller artisans rather than bigger jewellers, but it may be a route we need to go down.

This UK jeweler sets softer stones, Im not sure whether they'll take a customer stone as I haven't used them personally.

williamwhite - Etsy Singapore

Shop Contemporary & Handmade Jewelry from Cornwall England by williamwhite located in Penryn, United Kingdom. Smooth dispatch! Has a history of dispatching on time with tracking. Speedy replies! Has a history of replying to messages quickly. Rave reviews! Average review rating is 4.8 or higher

www.etsy.com

I think if the stone gets damaged during setting then this is not something the jeweler is likely to cover. I'm afraid they only typically have insurance to cover stones they source themselves. So it's very atypical for them to cover damage to an outside stone.

Only thing I'd note is I'd try to avoid a bezel as you might want to repolish the stone later. And I'd be trying to put something protective (build the setting up) arround the corners which will be prone to chipping.

Thank you! I will pass the name on to him.


I can’t find anything else I like as much as this stone. Because how do you separate that percent one from one million possibilities??

Garnet is both our birthstones, green is both our favourite colour, we have an in joke regarding triangles, and the added difficulty with finding a stone sourced from the area we wanted gave it that little rare touch.

I can see why people like authentic over simulated. I could have a gorgeous asscher cut, sparkling grey, simulated stone for an affordable price, but it’s not very special for “the stone” if you know what I mean.

 

[NexivRed]

A bit more eye candy of her. I haven’t held or even seen her in ages either because my other half has hidden her away lol.

Not in focus much as they’re stills from a video the vendor sent to us before the purchase. But my gosh does this thing fire away like crazy! I think the turquoise blue surprised me the most.

 

[T L]

Yes, the finer Namibian demantoids, give off turquoise blue flashes. Beautiful gem.

 

[JewelledEscalators]

I will ask him if he’s contacted them. I think so far he’s kept to smaller artisans rather than bigger jewellers, but it may be a route we need to go down.

I wouldn't say Hatton Garden is full of big jewellers - lots of small businesses, and some businesses that specialise in jewellery repairs etc.