PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[TravelingGal]

Date: 5/30/2009 7:38:03 PM
Author: curlygirl
NF, from what I understand, it''s just straight honey that you''re not supposed to give. I think if it''s cooked in, it''s not an issue but I could be wrong. As a 2nd time mother, I''m way more laid back so maybe you guys shouldn''t listen to me too much but I''m pretty sure it''s ok!!!

The problem is infant botulism - those spores are found in raw honey.

However:

"Although parents often know not to give their infants under twelve months of age plain honey, they often overlook other foods that contain honey in them, such as Honey Graham Crackers, Honey Nut Cheerios, Honey Wheat Bread, etc. Although the honey in these foods may be processed, it may not be pasteurized, and so may still contain botulism spores in them and should be avoided. If you feel strongly about giving these foods to your infant, call the manufacturer to make sure that they are safe."

http://pediatrics.about.com/od/weeklyquestion/a/04_infant_honey.htm

and from http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com/infantbotulismhoney.htm

"A commonly asked question when it comes to foods for infants is about giving babies honey. It is said that honey should never be given to a child under the age of 12 months old. In fact, The American Academy of Pediatrics advises that honey should not be added to food, water, or formula that is fed to infants younger than 12 months of age. This technically, applies even to honey in baked or processed food goods. The AAP statement says "Raw or unpasteurized honey (Infants younger than 12 months should avoid all sources of honey)". AAP Pediatric Nutrition Handbook
Botulism spores will NOT be destroyed during and under household cooking methods and temperatures! The botulism spores can only be killed by the high heat which can be obtained in a pressure canner. The toxin (that is produced in anaerobic conditions) can only be destroyed by boiling (OSU Botulism FAQs). So technically, honey is not safe for infants even in cooked form such as in baked foods like breads."




That being said, I think I gave Amelia bread with that had honey awhile back. It was wheat bread, but so many brands have honey in it. Fortunately she seems fine!

 

[curlygirl]

Wow, TGal, who knew?! I don't do tons of research on this stuff. I equate "no honey" with "don't give your kid a spoonful of honey", never thought about if it was already cooked into something and was never told anything like that by my pediatrician. I was just trying to avoid excess salt which is why I didn't give regular pretzels. I gave the exact same pretzels to Lily and as far as I can tell, she is alive and thriving so I'm not going to lose sleep over this.

I also ate deli meats and soft serve ice cream during both pregnancies so as you can tell, I'm a bit more laid back about these things in general. I pretty much do things instinctually rather than researching everything to death and try to be smart about the decisions I make in addition to heeding my pediatrician's advice. But that's just me and my personality. But for the rest of you moms, don't listen to me! I'm going to stay away from this thread or else I'm going to feel like I'm a bad mother.

 

[fieryred33143]

BBLLEENN!!! George is sooo adorable

I want more baby pics from everyone!

 

[janinegirly]

Curly: I like your style which is why I always ask your advice!

I was asking about the pretzels since I was thinking I probably need to avoid the salty ones (which is all we eat at my house), so thanks for filling me in! I know what you''re saying about the babies growing too fast...Lily especially, she was barely at the newborn stage! But you still must be loving it all and she sounds like she''s doing fab. How''s her sleeping routine these days? Are you finding balancing 2 is manageable now that Lilly''s a bit older? Anyway, thanks for all the info as usual!!

Diva: James sounds so funny, I love the "scaling the walls" comment, I can just picture that! It''s like one moment theye helpless blobs, then all the sudden they are wild and unstoppable! I''m trying to keep up and am only at the backward crawling stage--I can only imagine what walking will be like!


C''s doing well--I took a few days off and it was nice to be around her 24/7. Except for the fussy moments when she didn''t want to be put down anywhere, haha. She''s learned to stiffen her legs to avoid the high chair, geesh! And everything that she shouldn''t touch, goes in the mouth (despite all the toys I offer): remotes, plastic anything! I bought her a snazzy shopping cart cover (which I love) and she managed to find the few sections uncovered and held onto those!

. Another funny thing happened over the weekend--we went to a rug store (exciting, I know!) and they had a little toy area for kids. I plopped her in front one of those Fisher Price Laugh & Learn tables (with the big mirror and crazy lights and music) and she went nuts! Yelling, hitting it, looking around and yelling and pointing at strangers. So the store told us to take the toy! I said no no..but they insisted! So now we have another loud, blinking toy! I thought it was very sweet of the woman, but my DH thinks it''s a sales technique, haha.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/1/2009 8:38:05 AM
Author: curlygirl
Wow, TGal, who knew?! I don''t do tons of research on this stuff. I equate ''no honey'' with ''don''t give your kid a spoonful of honey'', never thought about if it was already cooked into something and was never told anything like that by my pediatrician. I was just trying to avoid excess salt which is why I didn''t give regular pretzels. I gave the exact same pretzels to Lily and as far as I can tell, she is alive and thriving so I''m not going to lose sleep over this.

I also ate deli meats and soft serve ice cream during both pregnancies so as you can tell, I''m a bit more laid back about these things in general. I pretty much do things instinctually rather than researching everything to death and try to be smart about the decisions I make in addition to heeding my pediatrician''s advice. But that''s just me and my personality. But for the rest of you moms, don''t listen to me! I''m going to stay away from this thread or else I''m going to feel like I''m a bad mother.

Ha, well, I can tell you now, I didn''t!!! I figured the same thing as you (spoonful of honey thing.) The only reason I looked it up is that I didn''t want to give incorrect information (my initial answer was that botulism was in raw honey only) and what do you know, the baked goods thing came up. My ped didn''t tell me anything either, hence why Amelia got the wheat bread with honey.

So if the other moms want to be better moms than we are, I figured they might want to know about the processed goods stuff!

 

[snlee]

Hi everyone! Things are been really busy here. My apologies for not being able to keep up and respond to everyone individually! I am so behind!

Hi curly and diva! Sounds like your little one are doing well!

dreamer, hope Hunter feels better soon!

janine, how funny about the FP toy! So are you going to buy anything from that rug store? Haha!

BFing got better and now worse! D bit me a few times this weekend! OWWW! All times when he was crabby so when I said, "NO! Don''t bite mommy, it hurts!" he just cried! He has 2 bottom teeth and that already HURTS so badly. I am dreading when he gets his top teeth. I used to really enjoy BFing but now I''m scared of it! I need to teach him to not bite me! I hope he learns quickly!

 

[janinegirly]

snlee: we''re not sure about the rug! I told DH we have to buy it from there, but of course he found it at 1/2 the price on the internet, so now what? haha. Well she did "vehemently insist" and said she has 2 others at home for her grandkids and wanted to get rid of it. But I do feel guilty! And ouchie on bf''ing! I always wondered how BF''ing moms do it once teething kicks in. C bites my finger and it hurts so bad so I can''t even imagine! She pulls my hair like she wants me to be bald, and I''ve also said "no, that hurts, do it nicely" and try to show her how to pet my head. Doesn''t work! TGAL needs to tell us how to do a better job at this part

!

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/1/2009 11:54:38 AM
Author: janinegirly
snlee: we''re not sure about the rug! I told DH we have to buy it from there, but of course he found it at 1/2 the price on the internet, so now what? haha. Well she did ''vehemently insist'' and said she has 2 others at home for her grandkids and wanted to get rid of it. But I do feel guilty! And ouchie on bf''ing! I always wondered how BF''ing moms do it once teething kicks in. C bites my finger and it hurts so bad so I can''t even imagine! She pulls my hair like she wants me to be bald, and I''ve also said ''no, that hurts, do it nicely'' and try to show her how to pet my head. Doesn''t work! TGAL needs to tell us how to do a better job at this part

!

ha don''t ask me. I just did what lili did, said "gentle" over and over again to any face smacking and hair pulling. She gets it MOST days but she is a little tot after all. I did the gentle thing to the hair pulling starting when she was about 3 or 4 months old, so it was a LONG time in training.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Congratulations Pandora!

 

[puffy]

snlee the quickest way that i was able to teach B not to bite was basically bite mommy and he gets no milk for awhile. and he learned QUICK!!! i tried other things, to just tell him no then re-latch him, tell him to be gentle, tell him it hurts, basically you name it, i tried it. until one day, i told him no and i got side tracked, so i didn''t purposely take his milk away, and i didn''t re-latch him until a few minutes later. ever since then, he did not bite me. i don''t know if that was a bit extreme, but it worked.

 

[snlee]

Date: 6/1/2009 12:10:20 PM
Author: puffy
snlee the quickest way that i was able to teach B not to bite was basically bite mommy and he gets no milk for awhile. and he learned QUICK!!! i tried other things, to just tell him no then re-latch him, tell him to be gentle, tell him it hurts, basically you name it, i tried it. until one day, i told him no and i got side tracked, so i didn''t purposely take his milk away, and i didn''t re-latch him until a few minutes later. ever since then, he did not bite me. i don''t know if that was a bit extreme, but it worked.

Thanks puffy! I will give this a try!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/1/2009 12:28:17 PM
Author: snlee

Date: 6/1/2009 12:10:20 PM
Author: puffy
snlee the quickest way that i was able to teach B not to bite was basically bite mommy and he gets no milk for awhile. and he learned QUICK!!! i tried other things, to just tell him no then re-latch him, tell him to be gentle, tell him it hurts, basically you name it, i tried it. until one day, i told him no and i got side tracked, so i didn''t purposely take his milk away, and i didn''t re-latch him until a few minutes later. ever since then, he did not bite me. i don''t know if that was a bit extreme, but it worked.

Thanks puffy! I will give this a try!

Along the same lines, my best friend would immediately say "No biting!" sternly, take her daughter off the breast and set her on the floor or chair beside her for a little while. Of course, her daughter cried, then about 15 to 20 seconds later she would relatch. Same concequence if she bit again. Worked a charm after only a couple times! It doesn''t hurt your child to do this, it just surprises them a little, so I think it is a great method!

 

[snlee]

Date: 6/1/2009 12:47:39 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 6/1/2009 12:28:17 PM
Author: snlee

Date: 6/1/2009 12:10:20 PM
Author: puffy

snlee the quickest way that i was able to teach B not to bite was basically bite mommy and he gets no milk for awhile. and he learned QUICK!!! i tried other things, to just tell him no then re-latch him, tell him to be gentle, tell him it hurts, basically you name it, i tried it. until one day, i told him no and i got side tracked, so i didn''t purposely take his milk away, and i didn''t re-latch him until a few minutes later. ever since then, he did not bite me. i don''t know if that was a bit extreme, but it worked.

Thanks puffy! I will give this a try!

Along the same lines, my best friend would immediately say ''No biting!'' sternly, take her daughter off the breast and set her on the floor or chair beside her for a little while. Of course, her daughter cried, then about 15 to 20 seconds later she would relatch. Same concequence if she bit again. Worked a charm after only a couple times! It doesn''t hurt your child to do this, it just surprises them a little, so I think it is a great method!

Thanks for sharing dreamer. Sounds like that will work so that''s what I''ll do.

 

[lili]

Blen
Eee.....what an adorable picture of George in his monkey diaper wrap and socks!

snlee
Ouch! my sympathy for biting.
I''d do what Puffy and DD suggested.
You''ll have to take him off and keep him off for awhile before relatching.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Sleep Advice Please!

Hunter is 3.5 months old.

Right now Hunter goes down around 8pm and wakes around 3:30/4:30 am for a feed, then wakes again at 6:00/6:30 am for a feed and I usually put him down again at that time because I am NOT a morning person, and he sleeps until around 8am. But that 6:30 wake up is getting annoying because it isn''t really worth putting him down again! So my plan right now is to bite the bullet

and wake up with him at 6am in the hopes that he will go down earlier at night. I would ideally like him to wake at 7am when Dh gets up for the day, so I am also getting a black out curtain and leave a fan on for white noise because I think the sun coming up and the birds singing wakes him up. Does this sound ike a good plan? If I want him to wake for the day at 7am, what do I do when he wakes at 6:15? He is like clockwork waking at that time every day, it is a little spooky.

Also, how do you know when it is time to no longer nurse in the middle of the night? When he wakes at 3/4am he seems hungry and eats well for about 10 minutes. At some point though I assume I could start using the BW method of giving him a soother or picking him up to calm him and then putting him down again to sleep without nursing. But how will I know when the time is right for that?

I won''t even go into the napping situation

Right now he napes for about 45 minutes in every 3 hours cycle. So it is pretty on par with what the BW says should go on, but it leaves me no time at all to do anything! When do babies start sleeping for 2-3 longer stretches?

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/1/2009 5:46:24 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie
Sleep Advice Please!

Hunter is 3.5 months old.

Right now Hunter goes down around 8pm and wakes around 3:30/4:30 am for a feed, then wakes again at 6:00/6:30 am for a feed and I usually put him down again at that time because I am NOT a morning person, and he sleeps until around 8am. But that 6:30 wake up is getting annoying because it isn''t really worth putting him down again! So my plan right now is to bite the bullet

and wake up with him at 6am in the hopes that he will go down earlier at night. I would ideally like him to wake at 7am when Dh gets up for the day, so I am also getting a black out curtain and leave a fan on for white noise because I think the sun coming up and the birds singing wakes him up. Does this sound ike a good plan? If I want him to wake for the day at 7am, what do I do when he wakes at 6:15? He is like clockwork waking at that time every day, it is a little spooky.

Also, how do you know when it is time to no longer nurse in the middle of the night? When he wakes at 3/4am he seems hungry and eats well for about 10 minutes. At some point though I assume I could start using the BW method of giving him a soother or picking him up to calm him and then putting him down again to sleep without nursing. But how will I know when the time is right for that?

I won''t even go into the napping situation

Right now he napes for about 45 minutes in every 3 hours cycle. So it is pretty on par with what the BW says should go on, but it leaves me no time at all to do anything! When do babies start sleeping for 2-3 longer stretches?

DD, I''ll defer to the ladies who BF''d, but I stopped the middle of the night feeds at 3 months. (3 months, 4 days, to be exact). My ped told me at the 3 month appointment that babies do not need it at the time of the 3 month mark, whether it be formula or BM. Honestly, I didn''t believe him, but sure enough, on July 4th, she slept the night through 12 hours and I never gave her a middle of the night bottle since. She did stir here and there and I had to help her get back to sleep, but it was with a paci and not a bottle.

I think your idea is a good one. Try putting him down at 7pm. See what time he wakes up...he should get up once, then again at 6:15 ish. Honestly, that might be his internal clock wake up time, and then you''re screwed!

I jest in part because that is what happened to me! I HATED that Amelia''s wake up time was between 6 and 7 (with it often being closer to 6), so I figured I''d put her down earlier because that time was just ingrained in her. It just never changed, but to be honest, since I wanted the 6-7 pm bedtime, I didn''t do much to try to change it and worked around that internal morning alarm clock she had.

So I''ve just sucked it up and deal with the early wake up time, but of course, my kid goes down at 6:30, so there is the beauty of it. Ideally, I should be going to bed at 10pm, but I rarely do (mostly it''s 12-1am), so I''m pretty well screwed almost every morning.

As for naps, I will have to go back and see, but I went back to work when she was 4.5 months, so I know by that time, I had her on a 3 naps schedule (9 am, 12ish, and 3pm) She slept for an hour in the morning, 1.5 hours or so at the second and 1 to 1.5 in the late afternoon, with her bedtime at 6:30ish. I''d have to double check, but I think that was it.

 

[lili]

DD
I''m still waiting for mine to nap for more than an hour!
Obviously, I won''t be any help to you in the sleep department.
Good luck though.

 

[Blenheim]

I never would have known that about the honey. It is safe for me to eat, right?

DD - how funny how different they are. I''m not entirely sure if George even realizes that he has legs half the time.
Hopefully putting H down for the night earlier would help. I''d personally keep doing night feedings if he seems hungry, and kind of play it by ear about when to stop.

Snlee - ouch. Hopefully the other mamas advice works.


After all of the effort I went through to get a picture of George smiling, DH was able to snap one in about two minutes yesterday.

Of course, I did put the camera on the right settings for him, which it took me a while to figure out. So I guess I shouldn''t compare. And thanks for the compliments!

We''re trying to make some big life decisions right now. We''re doing ok with our current arrangement of me working and DH staying at home, but as soon as his unemployment runs out we''ll be in the red each month. We have enough money in savings that it wouldn''t be a dire emergency, but he''s been looking and looking for work and there''s seriously nothing here and we don''t see it getting better anytime soon.

DH applied for a job today that looks just like what he''s looking for, as far as the job itself goes. And while he clearly hasn''t heard back yet, we''re trying to figure out if it''s something that we''d acccept if he got an offer. It''s in a small town in a rural area, and happens to be 5 miles from where my grandmother and uncle live. My grandmother should be in assisted living right now but won''t move out of the house because she can''t stand the idea of no one living there (it''s been in the family since the 1800''s). My mom, who owns the house, would be fine with us living there rent-free as long as we paid taxes, insurance, maintenance, and utilities. It''s a great house and has a lot of land, with woods and trails and lots of room for dogs and kids to roam. Cost of living''s low to begin with and the lack of mortgage/rent would make it even cheaper for us to live, and so we should be able to live comfortably off of DH''s salary (assuming of course he got the job), save for retirement, put money into savings, etc. So I wouldn''t have to go back to work. And honestly, I want to stay home with George for a while. But I''d want to be able to go back to work when George (and any other kids we have) get a little bit older, but I know that it''s so hard to re-enter the workforce if you wait too long after leaving. I could try to find a job in one of the two nearest large cities when he gets to be a little bit older, so that I stay in the work force, only they''re both about 45 miles away which seems long to do on a daily basis. Although - I''m doing 35 miles each way now. And then there''s the issue of if we''d want to live in the country. We''re both outdoorsy and like roughing it, but how would we handle the lack of close ethnic restaurants and gourmet food stores? The community there is really tight-knit and seems to be a great place to raise a family. It''s also much much closer to our parents - we''d be able to see them every weekend if we wanted. Of course, all of this may not matter at all - depends on if he gets an offer.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Beln whenever I am in that type of situation I wait until I really need to make the decision before I make the decision. Sometimes things become clearer when it is real, KWIM? From what you have said, though, I would make the move and the free accommodation. All those "what ifs" are bridges you can cross if you get to them! For graduate school I moved from a big city to a small town without all the gourmet restaurants and ethnic food and managed much better than I thought I would. And as for work, you can''t predict the future no matter what choice you made... who knows what the economic situation or political situation or your personal situation will be like in 5 years when your kids are grown and you want to go back to work? All you can do is make the best choice for right now and try to keep doors open for later on. Perhaps you can do some very very part time work to keep your foot in the door. Anyhoo, that''s my thoughts. And remind ME of your first name again and maybe I can find you on FB?

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/1/2009 5:58:25 PM
Author: TravelingGal
DD, I''ll defer to the ladies who BF''d, but I stopped the middle of the night feeds at 3 months. (3 months, 4 days, to be exact). My ped told me at the 3 month appointment that babies do not need it at the time of the 3 month mark, whether it be formula or BM. Honestly, I didn''t believe him, but sure enough, on July 4th, she slept the night through 12 hours and I never gave her a middle of the night bottle since. She did stir here and there and I had to help her get back to sleep, but it was with a paci and not a bottle.

I think your idea is a good one. Try putting him down at 7pm. See what time he wakes up...he should get up once, then again at 6:15 ish. Honestly, that might be his internal clock wake up time, and then you''re screwed!

I jest in part because that is what happened to me! I HATED that Amelia''s wake up time was between 6 and 7 (with it often being closer to 6), so I figured I''d put her down earlier because that time was just ingrained in her. It just never changed, but to be honest, since I wanted the 6-7 pm bedtime, I didn''t do much to try to change it and worked around that internal morning alarm clock she had.

So I''ve just sucked it up and deal with the early wake up time, but of course, my kid goes down at 6:30, so there is the beauty of it. Ideally, I should be going to bed at 10pm, but I rarely do (mostly it''s 12-1am), so I''m pretty well screwed almost every morning.

As for naps, I will have to go back and see, but I went back to work when she was 4.5 months, so I know by that time, I had her on a 3 naps schedule (9 am, 12ish, and 3pm) She slept for an hour in the morning, 1.5 hours or so at the second and 1 to 1.5 in the late afternoon, with her bedtime at 6:30ish. I''d have to double check, but I think that was it.

I wonder if all along Hunter has been wanting to go to bed earlier? He often has a nap around 6pm, which seems silly if he goes to bed at 8pm, but maybe that is when he really want to go to sleep for the day?

Anyways, he went down at 7:30, we nailed towels up over the venetian blinds in his room

(classy) and I put a fan on. My plan tonight is to go in and try the paci when he stirrs. Blen If he is truly hungry I will nurse him for sure, but I think he isn''t actually hungry. He usually just nurses for a short time and he weighs probably 15lbs now, which is over the 14lb point needed to sleep through the night. Anyways, we''ll see how it goes!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

They say the ideal is for them to be up at 7 am, first nap at 9 am, second at 2 pm, bed at 7 pm. I stopped nursing in the middle of the night when she stopped asking for it (6 months). Granted she was underweight so at my 4 month appointment my pedi said WHENEVER she demands to be fed, to feed her! I would ask your pedi what (s)he thinks since every baby is different. A trick I read about is to send dad in there with a bottle (BM or formula) and if the baby drinks it than he really was hungry. If not, it is for comfort. I would try that.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/1/2009 8:39:07 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
They say the ideal is for them to be up at 7 am, first nap at 9 am, second at 2 pm, bed at 7 pm. I stopped nursing in the middle of the night when she stopped asking for it (6 months). Granted she was underweight so at my 4 month appointment my pedi said WHENEVER she demands to be fed, to feed her! I would ask your pedi what (s)he thinks since every baby is different. A trick I read about is to send dad in there with a bottle (BM or formula) and if the baby drinks it than he really was hungry. If not, it is for comfort. I would try that.

Then I''d have to pump and make a bottle

I know I should get him used to it but it seems like such a hassel only to have him refuse it anyways later... I''ll try the paci tonight and see what happens. I don''t see the doc again until H is 4 months, so I''ll ask then if this is still an issue. He is a big healthy boy so I don''t think the weight thing is an issue. I suspect that if he is really hungry then he will let me know!

 

[Courtneylub]

Dreamer, I''m glad you''re asking about this so that I can see the responses! When he starts sleeping through the night, won''t you have to get up and pump?

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/1/2009 8:49:00 PM
Author: Courtneylub
Dreamer, I''m glad you''re asking about this so that I can see the responses! When he starts sleeping through the night, won''t you have to get up and pump?

I don''t know... nature is a wonderful thing and I trust my boobs to keep up with him! LOL! Right now I alternate breasts so if I feed on the left at 8pm I don''t feed on it again until 6 am and my supply is more than adequate. And I don''t really keep track of which breast got the 10 hour break on which day, so it is possible that the same one is always getting the long break

He nurses every 2 to 3 hours during the day, so that should keep my supply good and strong. I think what I would do if it looked like my supply wasn''t as good is I would just feed from both breasts at the night and morning feeds.

About two weeks ago I felt like my supply wasn''t as good but Hunter just nursed a TONNE for about 2-3 days (longer feeds mostly) and it really increased my supply a lot I found.

How is BFing going for you? Remind me how old Alila is again? I found it got a lot easier when Hunter was about 4 weeks and then it got easier again when he was about 10 weeks and had more head/neck control. How he wort of sits in my lap to nurse if I am out and it is easy-peasy!

 

[Blenheim]

DD - It''s Elizabeth, which honestly would only help you if you were already friends with Mela. And you''re probably right.

Dh and I just talked some more on our daily walk - it was talking with my mom earlier today that had me feeling worried with all of the what ifs, and we think that she''s probably projecting. She was a SAHM for 23 years (with some part time work on and off, never in the same field) and had a hell of a time trying to find a job when she decided to leave my dad. She''s currently in grad school because that''s the only way that any job she''d like to do would hire her with so much time out of the work place. She said that she''s heard that you''re basically screwed if you take off anything more than 6 months, but is hoping that employers would cut people a little more slack with the current economy. DH is now at 5 months...

Does anyone have friends who tried to go back after, say, 5 years? How was it for them? I feel that that''s just a completely different ball park than 23 years.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/1/2009 10:02:24 PM
Author: Blenheim
DD - It''s Elizabeth, which honestly would only help you if you were already friends with Mela. And you''re probably right.

Dh and I just talked some more on our daily walk - it was talking with my mom earlier today that had me feeling worried with all of the what ifs, and we think that she''s probably projecting. She was a SAHM for 23 years (with some part time work on and off, never in the same field) and had a hell of a time trying to find a job when she decided to leave my dad. She''s currently in grad school because that''s the only way that any job she''d like to do would hire her with so much time out of the work place. She said that she''s heard that you''re basically screwed if you take off anything more than 6 months, but is hoping that employers would cut people a little more slack with the current economy. DH is now at 5 months...

Does anyone have friends who tried to go back after, say, 5 years? How was it for them? I feel that that''s just a completely different ball park than 23 years.

I think your instincts are correct about 5 years versus 23. It also depends on your field and how specialized your experience and training is, I would guess. I do think keeping a foot in the door is essential.. either with volunteer work or part time paid work. Just to keep connections and also for recent references. You should start a thread in hangout on this issue more women will see it...

 

[Courtneylub]

Date: 6/1/2009 9:01:41 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 6/1/2009 8:49:00 PM
Author: Courtneylub
Dreamer, I''m glad you''re asking about this so that I can see the responses! When he starts sleeping through the night, won''t you have to get up and pump?

I don''t know... nature is a wonderful thing and I trust my boobs to keep up with him! LOL! Right now I alternate breasts so if I feed on the left at 8pm I don''t feed on it again until 6 am and my supply is more than adequate. And I don''t really keep track of which breast got the 10 hour break on which day, so it is possible that the same one is always getting the long break

He nurses every 2 to 3 hours during the day, so that should keep my supply good and strong. I think what I would do if it looked like my supply wasn''t as good is I would just feed from both breasts at the night and morning feeds.

About two weeks ago I felt like my supply wasn''t as good but Hunter just nursed a TONNE for about 2-3 days (longer feeds mostly) and it really increased my supply a lot I found.

How is BFing going for you? Remind me how old Alila is again? I found it got a lot easier when Hunter was about 4 weeks and then it got easier again when he was about 10 weeks and had more head/neck control. How he wort of sits in my lap to nurse if I am out and it is easy-peasy!

I have to feed Alila on both breasts for every feeding. I wish my supply was good enough to only be able to feed on one breast at a time! Mine get pretty engorged after 5-6 hours at night, so I would have to get up and pump not only to empty them out but also to keep my supply going.

BFing is going much better. You''re right, it became much easier around 3-4 weeks. Alila is 5 weeks on Wednesday! We actually took her to the doc today for the baby acne/rash that''s developed and weighed her. She''s 9 lbs 7 oz! That''s a 34 oz gain from her last appointment 2 weeks 5 days ago!

I need to start looking into getting her on a set schedule. Tonight we''re going to start supplementing one night feeding with formula and I''ll pump so that I can get a backstock of BM. I''ve barely been able to keep up with her demand, so I only have 5oz in the freezer and 5oz in the fridge.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/1/2009 8:16:36 PM
Author: dreamer_dachsie

Date: 6/1/2009 5:58:25 PM
Author: TravelingGal
DD, I''ll defer to the ladies who BF''d, but I stopped the middle of the night feeds at 3 months. (3 months, 4 days, to be exact). My ped told me at the 3 month appointment that babies do not need it at the time of the 3 month mark, whether it be formula or BM. Honestly, I didn''t believe him, but sure enough, on July 4th, she slept the night through 12 hours and I never gave her a middle of the night bottle since. She did stir here and there and I had to help her get back to sleep, but it was with a paci and not a bottle.

I think your idea is a good one. Try putting him down at 7pm. See what time he wakes up...he should get up once, then again at 6:15 ish. Honestly, that might be his internal clock wake up time, and then you''re screwed!

I jest in part because that is what happened to me! I HATED that Amelia''s wake up time was between 6 and 7 (with it often being closer to 6), so I figured I''d put her down earlier because that time was just ingrained in her. It just never changed, but to be honest, since I wanted the 6-7 pm bedtime, I didn''t do much to try to change it and worked around that internal morning alarm clock she had.

So I''ve just sucked it up and deal with the early wake up time, but of course, my kid goes down at 6:30, so there is the beauty of it. Ideally, I should be going to bed at 10pm, but I rarely do (mostly it''s 12-1am), so I''m pretty well screwed almost every morning.

As for naps, I will have to go back and see, but I went back to work when she was 4.5 months, so I know by that time, I had her on a 3 naps schedule (9 am, 12ish, and 3pm) She slept for an hour in the morning, 1.5 hours or so at the second and 1 to 1.5 in the late afternoon, with her bedtime at 6:30ish. I''d have to double check, but I think that was it.

I wonder if all along Hunter has been wanting to go to bed earlier? He often has a nap around 6pm, which seems silly if he goes to bed at 8pm, but maybe that is when he really want to go to sleep for the day?

Anyways, he went down at 7:30, we nailed towels up over the venetian blinds in his room

(classy) and I put a fan on. My plan tonight is to go in and try the paci when he stirrs. Blen If he is truly hungry I will nurse him for sure, but I think he isn''t actually hungry. He usually just nurses for a short time and he weighs probably 15lbs now, which is over the 14lb point needed to sleep through the night. Anyways, we''ll see how it goes!

DD, I''ve been going through and copying past posts about Amelia, so I am definitely refreshing my memory on what happened. I had Amelia going to bed at 9 at about 6 weeks (mid may). However, it was very tough to keep her up at 6 pm and she kept wanting to nap for some time. So I started marching the bedtime up. Within 2 weeks, she was parked at a 7 pm bedtime and still only waking up once.

So maybe 7 pm will be the ticket. Hopefully things go well tonight with the 7:30. Don''t be bummed if it doesn''t. From what I read on Amelia''s sleep "training", there were a few nights where she woke up early for her middle of the night feed, then woke up at 5am for the morning. If he does keep waking up early, don''t go into his room. Let him entertain himself if he can. That was one of the best things we did with Amelia. Even if she wakes up at 6:30, she is content to play by herself for a half hour to an hour, giving us a little extra shut eye in the morning!

Just keep at it (same 7:30 bedtime for a few days until things look like they are stable.)

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 6/1/2009 8:39:07 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
They say the ideal is for them to be up at 7 am, first nap at 9 am, second at 2 pm, bed at 7 pm. I stopped nursing in the middle of the night when she stopped asking for it (6 months). Granted she was underweight so at my 4 month appointment my pedi said WHENEVER she demands to be fed, to feed her! I would ask your pedi what (s)he thinks since every baby is different. A trick I read about is to send dad in there with a bottle (BM or formula) and if the baby drinks it than he really was hungry. If not, it is for comfort. I would try that.

Yeah, that is a great schedule - when Amelia went to two naps, it was 9 and 1 or 1:30 (she couldn''t make it until 2) but it''s a nice convenient time schedule for sure and something to shoot for if possible.

 

[Mrs]

hi everyone

pandora,I''m so glad your hospital called to apologize and will change things!! I hope D''s doing well!

nyc, I''ve heard mixed things about water but my gut follows what everyone here has said: probably best to wait until they''re a bit older.

curly, like you, I had no idea honey in processed foods were off limits as well. Thanks for opening my eyes!

dd, I''m glad H is better. That''s great that you were able to call the public health line when he was sick that night. With respect to his sleeping schedule, I have no advice but right now Sage is on the exact same schedule as H. She goes down around 8, wakes up at 3 to eat, and gets up again at 6. So I''m curious what others suggest as well. My efforts to get S to go down earlier have failed and when I did make it happen once, she added a wake up at 11:20PM which was not fun for me...

Diva, sorry James has been such a handful lately. I hope you had fun shopping today and have a great bday tomorrow!

janine, I''m glad you enjoyed your days off with C!

snlee, sorry D is biting you!! I hope he learns not to do that soon! Sounds like Puffy''s recommendation as to how to help him learn is best.

blen, G is adorable - I love the pics! I haven''t been able to get a smiling pic yet. I''m sorry you''re having to make such a big life decision so soon after G''s birth. We had to make a similar decision when S was a few weeks old and decided not to move since I myself don''t think I want to stay home and we like where we live now. We were fortunate because not long after we decided to stay where we are, DH got another job opportunity that''s working out well. Since you DO want to stay home and if this would give you the opportunity to do that AND save $, it sounds like a great move. I think you are wise to consider how difficult it might be for you to go back to work if you decide to stay home though. To a certain extent, I feel like I work now so that I can continue to work. My dad passed when I was young and my mom had only been out of work for 3 years so she was able to go back relatively easily. God forbid, if ever I were in a similar situation, I want to be able to support my kids like she was able to which is part of the reason why I''m choosing not to stay home. In any case, you''re clearly thinking this through from all angles so I''m sure whatever you decide will work out just fine! I know it must be stressful though. I really hope your Dh gets the job offer so that you have the option if you want it!

All''s well with us. My brother''s visit was great. He watched S last night so that DH and I could go out to dinner which was really nice. S has been sleeping relatively well for the most part and she has been smiling a lot more which has been wonderful! I can deal with her crying two seconds later much better when it follows a beautiful grin. Today she was fussy in the late afternoon and wanted to nurse to feel better and every time I would try to stick the paci in her mouth instead of my breast she would get mad. but then she would eat too much (since she wasn''t really hungry) and she would spit it all up. So frustrating. I hope she doesn''t make a habit of that.

Anyway, I hope you''re all doing okay!

Mrs