PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[natalina]

Mandarine- aww, thanks for saying I've been missed (warm and fuzzies

) and thanks for the tips on carseats! As for Ellie's schedule, it goes like this:
5am- wake up to nurse
7-7:30ish- wake up for day (nurse again)
1 hour later (8:30ish)- 3 tbsp. oatmeal and 1 container "seconds" fruit
2 hours after wake up (9:30ish)- nurse and down for nap. Usually lasts about 1.5 hours now, sometimes 2. And I agree with you, sleep sack is a MUST!!!
11-11:30- wake up from nap
1 hour later- Lunch: 1 container meat/veggies mix. Sometimes a little fruit.
2 hours after wake up from nap (1-1:30)- nurse and nap again. Usually at least an hour, but has gone as long as 2.
2:30-3:30- wake up from nap #2. Usually do errands if needed between now and dinnertime.
4:30-5ish- Dinner: 1 container veggies and a little fruit.
6:15- 3 tbsp. rice cereal
As soon as cereal is done, we start bedtime routine: bath, lotion/massage, jammies, nurse
7-7:15- down for the night
Hope that helps. So glad the boys are sleping well at night!!!

Mara- I went through the same back-to-work dilemma as you (love my job, love to prove myself, always had a good salary and never relied on anyone else, etc) but when it came down to it, I just could not go back. I really admire the ladies that are strong enough to do it, whether because they want to or have to. I really really do. It has definitely been an adjustment staying at home and living off of DH's salary, but I would not trade it. Although I am sure if I had forced myself to go back, that would be fine too. I'm sure you will find a situation that makes you happy- you definitely seem like a 'take charge' kinda girl, and I mean that in the best possible way

.

Fiery- thinking of you. ETA: I defintiely think a convo with your boss is in order. Think of it this way: If you don't take a vacation, you could possibly be forced out on a sick leave if your mental state continues to decline. I don't mean that to sound harsh AT ALL, I just think you need to put it into that kind of perspective. You don't just WANT a little break to lay on the beach, you NEED some time to take care of yourself. There IS a difference, and I really hope you have the kind of relationship with your boss where you can talk about this and it will be respected. BIG BIG hugs to you.

PG- I agree with everyone else that the joint account sounds like a BAD idea! I think Steph's suggestion to have him go over and walk her through everything is great.

Steph- OH yum!!! That dinner sounds delicious! Wowzers- little one, newborn and you are making homemade bread, dinner and cookies for a friend AND going jogging! I'm so impressed! I officially feel like a slacker now!

Ginger- hope you can get some answers soon. And yes, it is a scary situation when you are hoping to have an abcess

. Hugs.

Viz- have I told you how funny I think your avatar is? Are those chicken nuggets?!?!? Hilarious! Sorry you had another rough night. I really hope the doc can help your poor little guy. It just makes me so sad that he is still sick, and bummed for you that it's keeping everyone in your house sleep-deprived. Big hugs all around!

ETA: DrK- We big puffy heart Huggies at our house! I just can't stand the smell of Pampers. Anyhoo, sounds like she is definitely ready for size 1's. I remember when Ellie grew out of NB's- I was a little sad

.

 

[anchor31]

viz, ginger and fiery - Wow, your or your LO's health troubles are really putting my IL troubles in perspective... I will be praying for you three! fiery, I really think you should take a week of sick leave at the very least... You need to take care of yourself, sweetheart.

mtj - Yikes, if my DH dared to blame my disappointment in his inaction on hormones, we would have a homicide over here!

A lot of men don't get how exhausting and time consuming it is to take care of a baby. DH used to do that, when he got home from work he'd go straight to his XBox or computer while I had to juggle nursing J and making dinner, then he would come eat dinner and then go back to whatever he'd been doing while I juggled cleaning up and J's bath and/or bedtime. We had a talk and he told me that I never asked for help so he figured I was fine with it (that, I will never understand, but whatever), so now I ask. Every single day. It's a pain, but at least he does it. Funny, because he enjoys spending time with J and playing with him and giving him his bath, but he never takes the initiative. So my suggestion to you would be to ask him to 'please give J her bath/bottle tonight', 'please make dinner while I nurse her/keep her busy while I make dinner', ect. I don't even ask if he wants to do it. It has to be done, and you didn't make that baby on your own, so he has to step up and help.

 

[Mara]

fiery, you poor thing, hugs hugs hugs. i agree with whoever said you should do something about this now (work) or else it might escalate and you might not have a choice. if you don't have the kind of relationship with your boss where you can say 'if i don't do something now i will have to quit' then talk to HR. do you have any type of state disability you can tap into? one of my coworkers did this for 3 months for 'mental health' since she was having a hard time and she got like $1k a week in pay...not sure if your state has anything like this but i would def consider it.

viz, sorry there's no improvement in C, hope the ENT can be of some help at the appt.

mtj, i love j's cute pics, she is such a squeezable doll!

pg, yes i would feel uncomfortable with that. one of our relatives wanted to open some account for J and said they needed his social security no and i was like umm i dont think so.

ginger, ugh sorry that this is just dragging on and BOO on the gm being worse than the abcess. i am praying for quick resolution for you girl. how is A doing?

qt... yea i think that they like to err on the side of caution but the LC said that if you see the baby start to get more gassy or something then the milk was prob not good, but i didn't realize BM had bacterial fighting prop. amazing.

mp, so cute haha. i have another similar pic where J has mitts on. while i definitely don't miss those crazy floppy newborn days, i do look at pics of him and my heart just melts to think about how little he was.

thanks ladies re: working advice and tidbits. nat, lol, i am already thinking about 'what if' just in case. i have worked up the budget, and with what i have saved from maternity (since i spent really nothing!) and if i go back to work for 2-3 months and save most of my checks, i could afford to stay home for 11 months AND still pay everything i do today for our household. i think for me the big thing would be not having to add more burden to the household by being out, so if we can use this buffer i have built it would be ideal. there would be no 'extras' really but for a year i could do it.

nat, did you go back and realize you couldn't continue or did you not make it back? also in my field being gone a year is prob all i could manage without there being a 'hole' in my resume because i work in ecommerce so stuff changes REALLY quickly. on the flip side i am considering also trying to find contract or part time work so it's more on my terms.

i know the first week will be the hardest. thankfully during this reorg i have a new director, and they won't even start til a week after i return. so i will have probably 1-3 weeks of a light period where i don't feel too much stress but i imagine once he starts he will want full deep dives and reports on my programs...so we'll see.

re: maternity leaves and rehauling it, YES please. of course this is my only child so it won't help me in the future but it is almost like cruel and unusual punishment to EXPECT moms to return to work in 4 or 6 weeks, and look at me after 16 weeks, still wishing i had just a few more. greg's company is based in amsterdam so i was saying we should have lived over there so i could have taken like a year off and his coworker pointed out that in amsterdam they don't do epidurals (

) so i was like...ok nevermind hehe.

today is our 6 year wedding anniversary, it's crazy to think we have been together for 10 years and married for 6! poor greg has a cold which J and I are trying not to get so there is not a lot of family cuddle time right now, booo!! we are going to celebrate belated MD and the anniversary on saturday, but for today its just like any other day. its ok...i will snuggle the best gift G has ever given me even if he struggles.

oh and he also wants me to get some type of jewelry item to commemorate MD and the anniversary but i don't really want anything right now PLUS if i end up leaving work then i don't want to be wasting money so for now we'll just sit tight. but i am trying to think up some ideas for the future.

eta...i totally agree with anchor re: asking for help. a lot of times G wont' jump in because i just do it all and i CAN do it all. i am supermom right. hehee. but it makes it easier having help. so i just say 'hey can you burp him while i clean the bottle' or 'i need to make a bottle so here, entertain him for 5 min'. or 'change his diaper while i get his room ready for bed'. there are things we have 'routine' down too like he cleans the bottles and pump materials at night, he does all the kitchen cleanup, he empties the diaper bin daily. i think it makes it easier to set expectations and then ask for help because then you aren't fuming in resentment that he's not 'helping'. it's not intuitive for men, so definitely ask for it.

 

[mtjoya]

Thank you all ladies for your comments! I really appreciate it!

Anchor-LOL...story of my life right there! He goes directly to the stupid computer to play this new game that came out, so annoying. I will have to eventually sit down to talk to him. But anyways, I will go ahead and do that, thanks!

Fiery-Sorry that you are going thru a tough time. I have my high and lows. I hope that you get thru this quickly. Sending hugs and dust your way!

Mara-LOL...thanks she looks dorky lol! I love her!

 

[jcrow]

thanks for all the feedback on the pump or not to pump situation. i think i''m going to go with the purly yours without the bag + extra stuff. i really don''t need it if i''m just pumping from home occasionally. now off to find a deal on one...

 

[NovemberBride]

Happy Anniversary Mara! - Re: going back to work, my best advice is to go back to work for a while and see how you feel. The first few weeks are tough, so I''d give it at least a month or two to let some of the emotions subside before deciding. Even though I never wanted to be a stay at home mom, the week or two before I went back I started second guessing my choice and was dreaming up ways to stay at home. And the first couple of weeks were tough. However, I''ve now been back for a little over 3 months and I know I absolutely made the right decision to go back to work. I miss Olivia a lot, but I don''t want to be a SAHM. You may end up deciding you want to stay home, but since you had always planned to go back I''d give yourself some time to adjust before deciding. It''s great that you have the option though.

Fiery - Hugs - anyway you can ask to be taken off one of the projects and get some time off sooner?

 

[TravelingGal]

Fiery, just wanted to give you some hugs too.

Ginger, I''m still thinking good thoughts for ya.

Re: Tummy time...for your babies who hate it, try not splaying their arms out. Tuck their arms under them as if they were doing that hanging abdominal exercise. It props up their shoulders and makes it easier to hold the head up.

 

[Burk]

Fiery~More hugs over here!!

Ginger~Sorry for the bad news! Keep us posted!

Viz~Hugs to you too! I cannot imagine how you do it.

Mara~My LC said 6 hours about BM too. I didn''t ask if that means you keep it out at room temp or put it back in fridge and re-heat? Did the LC you talk to mention? Sorry you''re feeling conflicted about back at work. I was a wreck when I had to go back with T (even though it was only a few weeks before summer break). The following fall I started part time and it has been the best of both worlds for me. This time going back, while still hard to leave my baby (and K is with my MIL who holds him all day

...a whole other story)it was actually a pretty easy transition. Again I only have a couple weeks of work before summer break so I look forward to that. Good luck going back and making a decision. You''ll know what''s best for you guys after being back a few weeks.

mtj~Sorry about your fight. Men just don''t get it. The others are right, men need direction.

vesper~Sorry your little older son is having issues. It''s so hard for the older kids when the new one comes around. My DD wasn''t PTed yet (she''s only 2 and is partially PTed) but when K was born her sleep patterns became crazy!! She would wake at 4am and want to see mommy and baby Kade and she''s cry at bed time. It was a mess. Anyway, all this to say it just took a little time and now she''s doing great! Good luck!

Hi to everyone else!! LOVE all the pics!! Being back at work, plus DH who is traveling, plus new house means not very much PS time. Hopefully I can come up for air soon and start posting more regularly.

 

[qtiekiki]

natalina
Sounds like Ellie is ready for finger food. Just remember gagging isn''t choking; it''s the way babies prevent choking on things. Also they don''t need teeth for finger food; they can gum the food, and it''s really the motion of chewing that is important. M got her first teeth when she was 4.5 months, but she didn''t really know how chew with her teeth when we introduced finger food. Good luck.
We have the Britax Blvd (same size as Marathon) and Diplomat (same size as Roundabout). I would go with the Blvd/Marathon over the Roundabout/Diplomat if Ellie is tall. I like the Blvd and Diplomat over the Marathon and Roundabout because of the true side protection.
Ellis is adorable.

Mandarine
Yay for boys napping well. Could be the sleep sacks. Little thing can make a big difference.

Mara
I think J is ready for the sleep sacks. I started using them on my J when he was a few weeks old.
I knew the BM has bacteria fighting power, but didn''t know it can actually last so long.
That sounds like a great plan. To work a few more months and save your salary before deciding to be SAHM or not.
That pic of J out on the boppy is so cute.
Happy 6th Anniversary. I''ve been holding off on buying things the last couple months because I am not getting paid, even though DH tells me that we are fine. I just feel bad buying things that''s not necessities when I am not bring in income, so I''ve been asking DH if certain purchases are ok. DH tells that to stop being silly.

MP
Micah is so cute. Love his shirt.

Mtjoya
Awww J is adorable. Jaron looks so small compared to her.
Go and get yourself something nice. You deserve it.

Steph
Mmmm that dinner sounds delicious.

Ginger
Thinking of you. Take care.

PG
No, I wouldn''t be comfortable with DH having a joint account with MIL in your situation, especially since she is unstable. I mean he can make deposits even if he isn''t on the account, so that doesn''t even justify the joint account. So if she truly only wants DH to help her write checks, then can''t she just gives him the power of attorney over the account? That way your DH won''t be responsible for her debts. Either way, sorry you have to deal with it.

Viz
Poor Charlie. Hope he gets over his ear infection, cough and runny nose soon. It''s hard to see our babies sick. I always say that I rather be the one who sick than them.

Fiery
You poor thing. Big *HUGS*. Ditto everyone on doing something now. Talk to your boss. Your well-being is more important than your work.

drk
Sounds like it''s time to move up in diaper size. Don''t put too much emphasis on the weights on the diaper package. It''s just a guideline. A tall skinny baby will need bigger diaper even if they don''t exceed the weights listed.

Burk
I didn''t know you were back at work already. You are Super Mommy. Hope you get a little bit of time to relax soon.

 

[qtiekiki]

Couple pics of J.
Doing tummy time.

 

[qtiekiki]

You can''t see the paci, but here''s M insisting that J needs his paci. She is always putting the paci in his mouth.

 

[Burk]

QT~Cute pics!! T thinks K needs his paci all the time too!

I started work last Thursday. I wasn''t supposed to start until this Monday but my sub couldn''t stay. I figured not that big of a deal since I have summer break starting the first week in June anyway.

 

[steph72276]

Mara, happy anniversary. I actually met Adam 10 years ago today

Burk, good luck going back to work...summer vacation will be here before you know it.

QT, such cute pics!! Wow J is really holding his head up well!

Hi to everyone else, gotta run...the cookies are finished and the bread is almost finished rising. I''m trying to pop it in the oven really quickly while E is still napping. Have a great night everyone!

 

[phoenixgirl]

Thanks for the advice, all. I will stand my ground. I''m just annoyed because I know DH will think I''m the weird one. Sigh.


QTIE, those pictures are so cute! I don''t know what it is with me -- I was never a baby person before, but now I just want to hug and kiss all the babies in the world!

 

[ChinaCat]

Natalina- Hey lady! I was wondering where you''d been. CUTE pic of Ellie! Congrats on the new house. Oh, and that''s funny about the Pampers, we just switched to Huggies and I can''t stand the smell of the Huggies!!!!

Mara- We use the sleep sacks as a "blanket" for O, they don''t really restrict his movement. He can straddle me while I hold him (that sounds weird, but you know what I mean!), he moves all around his crib and even stands up and walks around the crib in his sleep sack. Back to work. That''s a tough one, as you know I''ve been struggling with it. I keep meaning to update on the situation, but just haven''t had time to properly lay out my thoughts. I will, but my short answer to you is I would go back and give yourself a month or two to find out how you feel. You can always quit later.

PG- NO on the joint account. Boundaries people! And I wouldn''t be ok with that many activities. I encourage my DH to do stuff, but it''s an equal thing. I get a night out if he does, kind of thing. We take turns.

Jcrow- Saw you decided on the pump thing. How is Emily doing? How are YOU doing?

EB- Meant to say that was a great idea about totally baby-proofing one room and then letting O loose.

Ginger- I don''t know what to say. It shouldn''t be this hard.

Wishing you much dust that the infection is the most benign, easiest thing to clear up with minimal time and pain, whatever that may be. PLEASE let me know if there is ANYTHING I can do to help. Even if it''s just dropping off some food for you guys.

Viz- You know, it''s so funny to me how "difficult" C is at night (and I mean that in the best possible way) but all of the pictures of him he is just so happy and smiling and CUTE. ENT appt is tomorrow, right? I am really really really really really hoping for some good news to come out of this meeting. Been thinking about you and your job whenever I think about my situation.

Mtjoya- Talk to him now. You''re going to have to swallow your pride and anger and try to make peace with him so you can get him to do things your way.

It''s a learning process for everyone involved, mom, dad, baby. If you wait, your resentment is going to build and the big fights happen. Hope things get better soon!

QT-

the pictures! J is so handsome. And love the pics of your two kiddos together.

FIERY. Girl. Ok, I think that you need to take a week off NOW. If you wait for a "good" time to be away, it will never happen. Think of it like you had an accident or when you gave birth- you had to leave THEN and they did manage without you. Get a doctor''s note or something if you have to. I do think that this is all wrapped up together and quitting your job seems like the easiest solution to get rid of stress. BUT your other stuff is still going to be there. That being said, if after you take some time to process and you realize that your job is simply not doable under these circumstances, then make a plan to either find a new job or reduce some workload. I so want to make this better for you.

Please keep us posted. And seriously, give yourself a gift and TAKE SOME TIME OFF. Get crazy sick with some contagious virus if you have to.

 

[Pandora II]

Fiery,
Please, please take some time off. Three years ago I could have written your post. The reason that you can''t cope right now is because you are stressed, anxious and depressed. When that happens small things that you would normally deal with easily become problems and things that are hard when you are well become massive obstacles. It is like trying to run a marathon with a broken leg.

As I said, 3 years ago I felt exactly as you describe. My GP begged me to take time off work and I refused as I had a major conference coming up. I nearly fell apart at the conference and only DH being there in person got me through. I saw my GP again when I got back and he gave me an ultimatum: take 3 weeks off work or he would have me sectioned and taken to a psychiatric unit whether I liked it or not. I took 2 weeks off and then started to see my current psychiatrist and get on the meds again.

Granted I have bipolar disorder, but the depression part of that is not really any different from unipolar depression except with what they treat it with. I promise you that you will get through this and life will feel how it should again, but you must regard it exactly as you would something like a broken leg. Mental illness strikes 1 in 4 people and is nothing to be ashamed off in any way. It''s nothing you can help and it doesn''t make you less competent or weak and it''s not something you can just snap out of.

I would really recommend starting the meds asap and then looking into something like CBT when you are feeling well again.

Massive hugs and please be kind to yourself and take a break!

 

[KimberlyH]

Mandy, awesome that the boys are nappping well! Thanks for the compliment on Jane''s name. We love it too!

Fiery, time off NOW. You can''t do anything well if you don''t take care of yourself.

Qtie, Jaron is GORGEOUS! Holy moly that''s one beautiful baby.

MP, great picture of Micah. He''s a darling boy.

Drk, Jane is 21" and weighs just about 8 lbs and we use size 1 diapers. The newborns were just not working well anymore.

Tummy Time: I have her do it a few times a day, just not as many as we should. I''m not too worried about it as she pushes up on my chest a lot and holds her head up really well for a baby her age. I''m going to bring out the boppy and try her on there. I hate it for breast feeding, or I did when she was first born, so I put it away. Maybe it will work better now that she''s bigger.

****

J had a huge meltdown last night while eating. She was screaming and batting at me, it was awful. I finally just defrosted pumped milk and fed her a bottle. It wasn''t the first time this happened but it was the worst. I''m hoping this doesn''t begin happening often, it broke my heart.

Any tips for taking a long drive alone with baby? We''re going 160 miles, just the two of us, in two weekends and my nerves are a bit frayed about the trip. I have a cousin who lives 1/2 way and have arranged to stop there, but plan on only doing so if J is awake, if she''s asleep we''re just going to keep driving.

 

[jcrow]

chinacat - emily and i are both doing well. she was having a bit of tummy issues and they are still there but not nearly as bad. hopefully it''s just her digestive system working out the kinks and figuring out how things work. she made 1 month last friday. my how the time flies! she''s having a few more awake periods in the day which are both fun and time consuming. when she''s awake, i feel the need to constantly interact, entertain + stimulate her. today i was able to get in a couple of naps while she slept which was heaven! gosh, sleep is positively wonderful!

 

[ChinaCat]

Kimberly- How old is Jane again? I was sort of a scaredy cat about driving with O alone when he was a baby, but it was actually pretty easy. My tips- get a mirror so you can see her so if she's crying you can tell if you need to pull over or if she's just crying. Try to time it around nap time so she will sleep most of the time. I always had a better trip if I did it in the morning. Just pack some bottles already prepared and plan to pull over at least once to nurse/feed/change diaper. I found if I did that at least once O made it pretty well without too much fussing. 160 miles is totally doable!

Jcrow- I think I've heard that a lot of babies that are born early have immature digestive systems but they usually get worked out in a month or two. Also, and I know you so aren't going to listen to me, because other people told me this and I didn't listen to them, BUT: Seriously don't worry about entertaining or stimulating them so much as newborns. I look back and I so should have enjoyed how much he slept and just kind of laid around. Because it does NOT last!!!! Also, babies really will be obvious about needing new things and stimulation, you really can follow her lead. I spent a lot of time thinking I was supposed to be entertaining him and feeling bad if I left him in the swing for too long. But there really isn't much you can do! Take her on a walk, sing to her, but just enjoy quiet time and cuddling with her. She'll get active soon enough. Just my two cents, but I really wish I'd worried less and just let him be more. Easier said than done, I know!

ETA: If you girls feel like sharing, would love to see pics of Jane and Emily!

 

[Mara]

kim... J rejects the boob sometimes too, he has been doing it more often actually, i hate it. he only feeds once a day on it anyway since he is a lazy boy, and was doing well for a while but the last 3 days he seems frustrated or bored and if i keep at it he gets flat out ANGRY. then takes a bottle. it might be that i am too slow flow for him now. but yeah it's a little sad. i kind of liked the skin to skin time at least once a day, but as long as he still gets some BM then i am fine with it. re: driving, we've gone to SF with J and back... it's only an hour each way but as long as you have food and she doesn't hate the car seat i think you'd be fine? i know sometimes after 2-3 hours in his carseat (aka out and about, driving, errands etc) J gets fussy so if its longer than that maybe schedule a dinner break somewhere and you can take her out and let her stretch out, do some tummy time etc for an hour somewhere then put her back in.

pg... re: other peoples babies, add me to that list!! i honestly NEVER cared for anyone elses babies. people always brought them to work and i was like meh. everyone i knew coo'd over them and i was just like whatever. sure i thought some were cute but i never felt the need to coo at them or hold them or want one. but now it's like
every baby is so friggin cute i want to eat them. it must be those crazy mommy hormones.

steph..yum cookies! so cute you met A on this day 10 years ago!!

qt... awesome pics of J! i love that his head is so strong!
TG...i put J on his arms but after a while he will flop them out and then that is when he gets mad hehee. today was probably the strongest i have seen him be with the little flipper looking arch.

burk:...re: the milk, i assume you'd want to put it back in the fridge to help stave off warm bacteria growth? but we didn't talk about it. the thing is that i would prob only feel comfortable leaving it out or using it maybe 2-3 hours max...on the good side it sounded like if the baby had 'bad' milk' it would pretty much only give them upset tummy which at least is not TOO bad. i was worried thinking they could get food poisoning or something but she just said 'well if they get gassy then you know it was too long'.

jcow... i think it's a good idea to get a pump--in the scheme of things the $100 or so is not a lot and it's a lot of peace of mind. i got mine on diapers.com-- if you use the 10% new customer coupon and you get free next day ship. re: entertaining the babies, it just gets more and more like that IMO. but at least now i also have FUN entertaining J...before it was more like 'is what i am doing even working?' ... and i agree with CC re: not feeling you have to stimulate her all the time. really her just laying somewhere and looking at a black and white wall print is stimulating enough for her at that age. NOW, he's so responsive so i can see when he loves something etc or when he needs to be changed around or given something new to look at. i actually spend like half the day just trying to do things to make him smile! haha.

fiery...i hope you are having an ok day and ditto ditto ditto the others re: doing something NOW about work. i know how it seems like you have to finish X or Y etc but as others pointed out, when is YOU time? and yes, you are more important than the job...esp your mental health.

re: work...yes i do plan to return, next week is when i start, on wed. thankfully i am working from home for 2 weeks to start--my sister will come over and help me with J til my mom gets out in june. my fill-in is actually going out on paternity leave the next day as his wife is delivering via c-section. it's kind of funny. i just went to his shower today at work--it was a little odd to be there again with J. anyway we'll see how it goes and in the meantime we'll just keep saving up as much as we can. it's such a mental struggle because internally i am thinking 'but i built my career up to where i am and i would hate to give that up AND there might even be an opp to move up right now since the org is in flux.' but on the flip side i am thinking 'but we only plan to have one kid and what if i miss it all and for what??'. as us ladies know, the typical struggle, feeling like you should be able to do it all and 10000% too. but thanks for the positive words, i have heard from some moms also that if you can just get over the first month hump that it will be so much better..so i have hope. and if i i can make it work maybe i work 6 more months then take a year off with J without worrying since in 6 months we can save double what i can in 3. or maybe go PT. anyway.

does anyone else's LO hold their breath and turn crazy angry red when they are really tired or PO'd? not even to let out a big scream or anything. J does this once in a blue moon and it's so freaky! he did it today at the office because he was really tired, the group was SO loud and everyone wanted to come and be in his face...i think he was just WAY overstimulated. he was sitting there turning more and more red and i was soothing and rubbing him, and finally he took a breath. then calmed down and fell asleep.

oh and what is it with people who want to keep talking to you or looking at/talking to the baby when you are trying to put them to sleep? after that episode, he was in his carseat, i put his shade down and had him on the floor rocking him and people were still trying to be peeking in and going 'hi baby'..i was like REALLY? he's obviously exhausted.

ETA... i finally did up J's crib wall, the naked one. i moved the crib away about a foot and used all these 3m picture command strips to secure 2 small pictures of him in the middle and then put a ring of ABC/123 decals around the pictures. the pics are light and small enough so if they do fall they should just fall down and even if they bounce into the crib they are only 5x7's. but i think we are ok, i am going to actually ALSO nail them into the wall just in case as double security. the cool thing about the ring of decals is that it's bright so he has something to look at but it's also our nursery colors which was awesome and i just found them at BRU. the room def looks more complete now! yay.

 

[vizsla]

MT- are things better with the hubs? my DH was extremely attentive for the two weeks he was home with me after baby.. but when he went back to work - and back to the ''real world'' - suddenly that guy disappeared. i was be-yond P.O''d. anyhoo, it took awhile for me to realize that - yes, i do have to ask for every single thing. but now that i do.. he does it.. no questioned asked. i kinda figure this is all training for baby #2 anyhoo, hope things are getting better. DH "issues" seem to go hand and hand when new babies are concerned - it takes awhile to get thru it, and come to an appreciation of your new life it''s something people don''t really talk about. they say in general terms ''your life will never be the same'' - yeah, sure... but it''s really hard to understand what - exactly - that means... it''s so much more than just having a new baby in the house right? (hugs)

ginger - any word?? ((hugs)) thinking of you!

fiery - just a thousand hugs for you! if you feel like giving us an update - we would love to hear if you are getting any sort of immediate stress relief from the job front. thinking of you too!

jcrow - love to see pics!!!

hey-ya mandy!!!!! loving those boys and their cuuuutttteeeeness.. they look more and more alike the older they get!!

vesper - i can''t believe c was only 11 days old in that pic! hope things are getting easier with you 3 y.o. (hugs)

burk - seriously? new house, new baby, back to work??? superwoman!!!

cc - hi-ya! i know right? he IS a happy baby which is why i feel like such an a** when all i do is complain about his sleeping. it obviously doesn''t affect him *that* adversely - wish i could share in his chipper disposition during the day

qt - OMG cuuutttee pics!!!

who am i missing??? everyone else?

hi ya!!

well, t minus 1 hour and 30 mins until DH takes C to the ENT... i''m crazy interested as to what he is going to say.

as far as the new jobby front for me.. the talks have stalled... which is soooo frustrating... it goes great for a few weeks and then .. fizzle... ugh, i''m so not good when it comes to this stuff...

hmmmm something good, something good, something good .... DH got me a beautiful necklace for mother''s day i typically have to pick out all of my gifts but i MADE him decide for himself this MD (i.e. i didn''t hint to anything i kinda have a thing for birds and he bought me the paloma piccasso gold (!) necklace from tiffany and co. i''m not a tiffany girl by any stretch of the imagination, but it was so sweet that he got it there.. because, as he says, "all girls like those blue boxes"

there! i thought of something good to post!

OH, i know something else... i''m co-hosting a bachelorette party this weekend! OMG! HOW am i going to do it?? i''m certainly not the same ''go out'' girl i once was, but that girl has got to make an appearance. i''m already trying to find my rally pants......

 

[steph72276]

Good morning pretty mamas!! It is a beautiful day here today. I am finally finished with all my spring cleaning, so I am going to go out and enjoy this day with my boys. Going on a run/walk with E, then picking A up for school from a playdate at the park with my mama friends, should be fun.

I went shopping yesterday for E b/c he is going through a major growth spurt. He just started wearing size 3-6 months like 2 weeks ago and now it all doesn't fit. So I decided to get him a few nice things from Gymboree and then pick up a whole bunch of cute little play clothes at Target. I didn't check girls, but the boys section has the cutest little sets by Carter for like $6 and $7, so I bought a bunch. I figure with my huge spitter upper, I have to change him 3-4 times a day, so cheap is the way to go!

Hope everyone has a great day!!

Fiery, thinking of you girl.

Kimi, I wouldn't worry too much about the trip. Try to head out when she's tired out and maybe stop half way to get out and move around/feed/change her.

Jcrow, glad little E is doing well...can't believe she's a month already!

Mara, hope you had a good anniversary despite G's sickness.

Viz, hope the appt. goes well. And yea for the necklace!!

Hi to everyone else, gotta go on our run before it gets too hot out!!

 

[fieryred33143]

My attempt at catching up

. I''m really behind. Like 3 pages behind

Mara-wow I can''t believe you guys are approaching 4 months already. I keep thinking of J as a newborn for some reason. Re: the wakeful...4 months is when they become more aware of their surroundings. They understand that mom and dad are in the next room, that a TV is on, that there are dogs outside, etc. so it''s harder for them to stay asleep. Almost like separation anxiety but not really. That''s why experts will say that 4 months is the ''official'' age to start using CIO because they can understand that they aren''t really ''alone'' it''s just that no one is giving in to your cries

. FWIW, we never went through the 4 month wakeful.

Also, I felt the same way as you. I didn''t want to be a SAHM, all throughout maternity leave I thought I could handle both, and then when it came time to go back to work I felt like I could really stay home. Having the option to stay home even if it means taking a lifestyle change will be a huge help for you as you begin to adjust mentally. Lots of moms do it and manage off of one salary too so if it''s an option, consider it!

Anchor-I''m sorry about the mother''s day fiasco

. ILs are so...blah...sometimes!

MP-I know you''ve received some great answers already re: the feeding. 3oz for his age should be plenty. I think we moved to 4oz around the time I went back to work, so 12 weeks? I totally get the love for the swing. It saved our lives in the first few weeks. Then that was replaced by the jumperoo lol. She couldn''t nap in it but it''s entertaining enough for a cup of coffee, some toast, and catching up on emails

. He''s really adorable!

China-Sophia screams too and for random reasons. O is really cute and we do the same with the TV sometimes. When she''s flipping out we''ll turn it on to a cartoon and it calms her down enough to let me comb her hair.

Amber-We started solids at 6 months. We did cereal and then waited a week before introducing sweet potato. Really, at Piper''s age you could start straight with the fruits/veggies and skip the cereal if you don''t want to use it. Also, when we started she would get her solids in the morning.

CDT-thanks for the rundown on the bottles and schedule! That''s really helpful. Sophia knows how to drink from a sippy, although she hasn''t mastered picking it up all the way to get the fluids out. She also has figured out how to use a straw but when she gets the liquid out, she gets startled and then either decides she wants more or it''s too scary to get more.

Viz-I hope today goes really well with the ENT and you guys get some answers.

EB-The b-day plans are a bbq in a park with whatever decorations I can manage to find in the next 8 weeks

. We''re doing it a week after her birthday because that weekend is 4th of July and I know it''ll be crazy.

Tao-Stage 2 when he''s gone through all of the starter veggies and if he seems to need more to get satisfied. We started puffs at 7 or 8 months. We just started yogurt...did not go well. I would do table foods right away. We didn''t because of my anxiety and now she refuses anything with texture. In order to get her to try anything, it has to be seasoned with foods she''s used to. I got her to try a little bit of bread with applesauce on it and some cinnamon.

MTJ-How are you feeling? If I were you, the next time he tries to get you to do something I''d tell him to do it himself and walk away. It isn''t fair and he needs to know that! J is really beautiful!

Vesper-Thank you for sharing your experience with me and for the hugs. I''m hoping the medication will make a difference too although I''m a little apprehensive about taking it. I''m sorry to hear about Andrew''s regression. Hope that resolves itself soon.

PG-I forget to ask for me time too. I''m going to start getting manicures again just to get out of the house alone. It isn''t a problem when I want to do something, I just don''t which is a problem.

Kim-hope the transition back to work goes well. Sophia hated tummy time too so we had to use the boppy and the TV

. It took a while for her to lift her head for more than a few seconds without crying. As for the long drive, fill that belly up before you go. I have driven with Sophia alone from home to my mom''s house, about 4 hours. I give her a bath, wash her hair, put comfy clothes on, and then give her as much milk as she can take. By the time I turn the car on, she''s asleep and will normally stay sleeping the whole trip. I usually stop after about 2 hours to get her up and moving and she''ll fall back to sleep again.

Natalina-Ellie is stunning

. We have the Safety First complete Air and so far we really like it. I''ll have to take a pic of her in it one of these days. Still haven''t decided on one for myself. I''m thinking about getting the First Year True Fit since it has a lot of the features of Britax but $100 cheaper.

Ginger-hugs for your struggles and I hope you get some answers soon.

Drk-I would probably get her in to a size 1 if she''s 8lbs. Sophia has always outgrown the diaper sizes by a few lbs before the printed limit because of her thighs. Plus, I think it''ll be better to start stocking up on size 1 rather than more NB.

QT-J is so adorable!!! I love how alert he is

Aw and M looks like such a cute big sister. Sophia has the same top lol!

Steph-Have fun at the play date!!

Ditto on wanting to see Emily and Jane

 

[fieryred33143]

AFM-went to a psychiatrist yesterday. He told me "you have too many worried about your daughter and it''s consuming your thoughts." That was his conclusion after the hour. He doesn''t think its PPD or PPA which is awesome but he does think I''m going through anxiety and depression so he prescribed some medication. I''m going to start taking it on Friday after work. He mentioned some people get really sleepy or can''t sleep so I didn''t think starting on a work day is a good idea.

Sophia is great considering her mom who keeps having breakdowns

. She''s crawling a lot more and moves a lot quicker now. She discovered how to get in to her bedroom and was so excited. I wish I had recorded it. She crawled over to the area to get to FI''s shoes (she loves shoes now) and then had a ''well hello there'' moment with her bedroom door. I opened it and she peeked in, scooted over a little, then started giggling and darted inside the room. She was fascinated with her crib and the closet doors.

She''s standing in her crib now at night. Last night she woke up screaming and I ran in there to check on her. She was standing in the corner. I picked her up and held her for a little while but she would not go back to sleep on her own. I don''t know how to stop this from happening. I ended up laying her down in the crib and just standing next to it. Whenever she would get up to crawl or sit, I''d stroke her hair and she would lay back down. That took 30 minutes so I need to figure something out. I don''t know how I feel about CIO if she''s standing because I''m afraid that she''ll fall and hit her head against the crib. I guess she sort of has to so that she learns not to let herself fall but I would imagine that wouldn''t help her in falling back to sleep too much. So for now I''m going to NOT pick her up when she''s standing but instead lay her back down and only do the pat/shush when she tries to get back up again. We''ll see how it goes.

Here''s a recent pic of her. I think, maybe on Monday? This was at MILs house. She''s in summer gear now, wearing onesies with no pants

Reminds me of her newborn days since she''s a July baby and it was so hot!

 

[jcrow]

once i get my computer back, i'll be happy to share a pic of little e! we brought it in yesterday for someone to look at it and the logic board needs to be replace. i'm hoping to get it back really soon! i'm lost without my mac.

 

[lilylover]

Hey everyone.

I am not a mommy, but have a question about my good firend who just had a baby a week ago today.

She is letting her newborn sleep as long as she wants to during the night. She told me that most nights she will sleep 5 hours at a time. This morning she posted on facebook saying that her baby slept 8 hours straight last night.

Maybe I am wrong, but I was under the impression that you should never let a newborn sleep for more than 4 hours without waking up for a feeding.

What''s the "rule" on this one? Should I say anything to her?

 

[jcrow]

lily - at the VERY beginning, we woke e up every 3 hours for feeding during the night. i think at about 2 weeks old, the pediatrican said to feed her every 2.5-3 hours during the day and 4 hours at night. she doesn't go 4 hours though because she wakes up hungry at about 3 hours or 3 hours and 15 minutes.

eta - that said e was a jaundice baby, so i'm not sure if that affected her eating schedule or not.

 

[cdt1101]

Date: 5/13/2010 10:51:47 AM
Author: lilylover
Hey everyone.

I am not a mommy, but have a question about my good firend who just had a baby a week ago today.

She is letting her newborn sleep as long as she wants to during the night. She told me that most nights she will sleep 5 hours at a time. This morning she posted on facebook saying that her baby slept 8 hours straight last night.

Maybe I am wrong, but I was under the impression that you should never let a newborn sleep for more than 4 hours without waking up for a feeding.

What''s the ''rule'' on this one? Should I say anything to her?

As long as her DR isn''t concerned about the baby''s weight then it''s fine. Personally, I NEVER woke my son to eat. But he didn''t lose much weight like some babies do after birth.

And I REALLY wouldn''t say anything to her regardless. She''s likely really hormonal and the last thing she''ll want to hear is another person telling her what she should do for her child.

 

[fieryred33143]

Date: 5/13/2010 10:51:47 AM
Author: lilylover
Hey everyone.

I am not a mommy, but have a question about my good firend who just had a baby a week ago today.

She is letting her newborn sleep as long as she wants to during the night. She told me that most nights she will sleep 5 hours at a time. This morning she posted on facebook saying that her baby slept 8 hours straight last night.

Maybe I am wrong, but I was under the impression that you should never let a newborn sleep for more than 4 hours without waking up for a feeding.

What's the 'rule' on this one? Should I say anything to her?

As for saying anything, my answer would be no. She's still in that period where the hormones are a bit out of whack and hearing from a friend that she shouldn't let the baby go 8 hours without eating could very well translate into she's starving her child and is a horrible mother in her mind, KWIM?

As for the rule, it depends on a lot of factors. If she's bfing, generally speaking she should be waking baby every 3-4 hours to eat in order to establish her supply and generally bf babies do digest the bm faster than a ff baby would.

However, once a baby has gotten back to birth weight, it's ok to let them sleep for up to 5 hours at night. If the baby is eating frequently throughout the day, she may not need more to get through the night. 8 hours is a bit much at that age. I remember Sophia was eating ever 2.5 to 3 hours at one week old per the advice of my lactation consultant. She wouldn't go 3 hours without waking to eat. But every baby is different.

Once Sophia hit a certain weight and the pedi said it was ok, I let her direct the night time feeding. I think it was around 3 or 4 weeks when I stopped waking her.

ETA: as long as she isn't deliberately not feeding her DD in order to get her to sleep longer, then it's ok to feed on demand. Letting her cry at a week old and not feeding her so that she can sleep longer is NOT ok.

 

[AmberWaves]

Quick post from me

Piper had been rolling onto her tummy in her bassinet, and has now forgotten how to roll back onto her back. So she now wakes up at least twice every night pissed off because she''s on her belly! On Tuesday I decided to just put her in her crib where she can roll around all night, and well... She''s still waking up twice a night pissed because she can''t roll back! Of course, she also has feet hitting the mush bumper, and all. This coupled with her extreme lack of naps is really exhausting me. At the 3am wake I just feed her and put her back down, and since I know it''s not hunger, I let her kind of grump herself to sleep- on her tummy. Sigh. I can''t take weeks of this!