Hudson_Hawk
Super_Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Nov 2, 2006
- Messages
- 10,541
Loves Vintage|1298468880|2857788 said:Help!?!?! I think my baby is getting a cold! I'm going to call the doctor in 30 mins, but I am not prepared for this. I've had a cold since Sat, so that means I made her sick.
Will I need a nosefrida? Anyone know if they have them in-store at BRU? Target?
Will she get a fever????
ETA: Saline drops? What kind? I've only seen some saline mist on-line? Is that what I need?
She's only one month old!!!!!
somethingshiny|1298565744|2858518 said:IMO, the first year of parenthood is the hardest in a marriage.
You're learning a whole lot about each other in a short amount of time, you're learning a whole lot about yourself at the same time, and the most important person in the world (baby) is at the stake. It's overwhelming to say the least. Open communication is key. DH and I nearly got divorced during our first year with JT. It took a lot of talking, dedication, and praying to pull us through. Only a couple of our issues were "big" the rest were stupid measly things that seemed catastrophic at the time. We had to sit down and discuss what really mattered most to us with our family and commit to making those things happen and let the rest go tot he wayside. Although we had discussed everything before getting married, you really don't know what's going to happen until you're in that situation. He wasn't quite the dad I had envisioned, and I wasn't quite the wife he wanted after I became a mom.
DH had a major problem with me not keeping up on the house at first. (I still roll my eyes about that one) I had to realize, my housekeeping and my cooking for him were ways that he felt loved. So, even though I usually didn't feel like it, I'd make an effort to do something for him. I hated being known only as "mama" I needed to feel like I was still his wife and friend so he had to make that effort. I had to let go of him not doing things for JT perfectly. Who really cares if only 2 snaps on the onesie are done? Definitely not anyone who is half sane, although I was half insane at that time.
This time with Lily, thankfully, we don't have any issues. I sit back and see what a good dad he really is. I see what a good husband he is even though he's not perfect. Sometimes he lets her pee through her diaper, sometimes he doesn't get her bottle the right temp, but I've learned to let it go.
Another big thing is letting go of your own "inadequacies." As moms, we feel like we should be able to do everything, remain sexy for DH, hold a job, and look pretty. If that happens once a month, you're doing awesome! As baby gets older, it gets easier for everyone.
Lastly, PPD hits in many forms at many times. It also recurs. Sometimes it requires a change in medication. If something is affecting your day, if worrying or being upset is changing your schedule, talk to the doctor.
It will get better, easier, and healthier for all of you.
If your house isn't being condemned, if you and your husband want to come home to each other, if your baby is happy, you have done your job.
One of the best things about watching your husband become a dad is that you get to fall in love with him all over again. And he gets to fall in love with you all over again. When a baby is brought into a healthy relationship, that relationship deepens tenfold.
somethingshiny|1298577344|2858637 said:Thanks, lliang! I thought it came out muddled because my mind was going a hundred miles a minute.
I know it's not bpf yet, but I took these pics of Lily yesterday. Wearing a shape sorter turtle as a hat. And, at certain times, I think she reminds me of a celebrity. Only when she's at a certain angle or with a certain expression. I finally figured it out. Maggie Gyllenhaal (sp?) Obviously Maggie doesn't have Lily's cheeks, but I think the big blue eyes, dark curls, and a certain expression give the similarity. (unless I'm nuts!)