PS Mommy Thread-Newborn to 12 months!

[janinegirly]

NEL: hang in there - it's tough and you are at the point in time when it feels the worst. It's so normal to feel the way you do - i.e. strteched and not dong a great job at either. On one hand you WILL adjust ...workng moms are master multi taskers. But on the other hand it is tough and I can't sugar coat it. There is never enough time. Holding off on #2 makes sense though, there is no need to rush on that and your K is still an infant. You could wait until the 1 yr mark to assess things objectively (just my suggestion - takes the pressure off, but if it happens sooner then that's great too).

Hugs (from WOHM who gets 5hrs interuppted sleep every night and spends wkends doing laundry/groceries .

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Thanks, Janine! I do think I will adjust and I know some things are going to have to give. I've always known that I would get to this point...it's just that now that I'm actually going through it, it's not exactly like I was expecting. Then again, I think all facets of parenting have felt that way to me.

Even though I know I'm not alone--there are millions of women going through the same thing--it does feel better to know that fellow moms share the same frustrations. Today I had lunch with a coworker who has a 7-month old and it was really helpful for me to hear that she is experiencing the same frustrations and pressures. And it's really great to hear from moms with more than one (like you, obviously), who still find a way to balance everything!

 

[janinegirly]

NEL: well I wouldn't say that I've found a way to balance everything, it's that I have to find a way and I am ok with what I've come up with. It's far from perfect (hence being slow to make my own baby food, lol). Trust me, something has to give and there are days when I'm frustrated and many days when I am TIRED. And other days when I feel DH isn't pulling his weight just because he's the DH (yet I am working the same schedule). And I'm not on a career fast track anymore - I'm more maintaining.
It's a question of being at peace with your choice(s) and still feeling that it is the best set up for you and your family in terms of short and long term scenarios/big picture. And if it's not or still doesn't seem to be after a few months or a year - then it's ok to reassess. You have options which is great. And how nice to have a co-worker with a LO who you can vent to and exchange experiences with!

 

[bubbly1126]

NEL, hang in there, lady! Having a child is a HUGE thing. It changes everything. It really does. There are days where I can say "I got this" and other days where I am like "how the heck do I think I could handle another baby?!" And my son is almost 10 months! It happens to ALL of us. It does get better and easier. And as I said before, it changes everything. It's an adjustment. Take a deep breath and just relax. It's just a rough patch and will pass.

And don't ever forget that you can come here and vent! No worries about being a Debbie Downer! We are ALL going through these same things. Keep your head up!

 

[lliang_chi]

NEL, Hang in there friend! I totally feel the same way you do about making silly mistakes and just feeling behind at work. There are points that I totally don't know what's going on and just really have to rely on my team to fill in the gaps. It's kind of not fair, but I feel totally in a vacuum especially coming back from Mat leave. But as Janine and IHA say, we'll find a way to make it work. I think holding off on #2 is a good idea for now, at least until you get your groove back.
And as an aside, Ethan had SUCH a good time meeting his girlfriend! It was so cute seeing them together. He loves watching other babies, but I personally think I've never seen him as interested as he was with Katie. Hee hee! She's just adorable!!!!

AFU, Ethan's been doing great. He was pretty good on his trip to Boston. Our flight back was delayed like 1.5 hrs, and considering everything he did pretty well. I didn't have enough milk pumped for our trip, so we had to buy some formula for the plane ride. He drank it just fine and thus far I haven't noticed any BM issues or anything. So it's good to know he can start taking formula if we need to.

Other news, trying to get Ethan to STTN again. When he got sick he'd get up MOTN. And DH, just to quickly "fix" the situation would just stick a bottle in his mouth. So now I'm working on breaking that habit. Sunday night was the first time I didn't give him the bottle. I nearly broke down, but he eventually fell asleep, after some major freak outs. Last night again he woke up and fussed for a good 1.5 hrs. He finally went to sleep when I held his arms down like he was being swaddled. I started putting him in a sleep sack and he's using them in daycare too. I'm hoping tomorrow will be the last night of him fighting to get some milk in the MOTN. We'll see. DH isn't the best help in those occasions, and I'm definitely telling him if he keeps giving him bottles MOTN he's the one that's going to have to break the habit next time.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

LC, I had a great time meeting you and Ethan! Ethan was so darned cute and such a great, laid-back baby!

I really hope that E's sleep starts getting better. I feel like sleep is the first thing to suffer when ANYTHING is wrong--a cold, a developmental milestone, the heat. K was up every hour a couple of nights ago and the next day I felt like a zombie. Hopefully coaxing E through his MOTN wakeups will only last a night or two!

And thanks (to EVERYBODY) for the support with work/life balance. This week is nice because I only had to work Monday, so I'm feeling good. Like IHA mentioned, there are days I feel great and days I struggle though. I have a feeling that will always be the case to some degree. Now if I could just keep those struggling days to a minimum, that would be greeeat (said in Office Space voice).

Hope everybody had a great 4th!!

 

[lliang_chi]

NEL, I'm kicking myself for not getting pics of Ethan and Katie together. We'll have ot meet up again so we can get that. I kept referring to Katie as Ethan's girlfriend, DH finally broke down and asked, "Who's Ethan's girlfriend?" Hee hee. Hope the little jumper fits her. It's SO CUTE, and I don't get to buy little girl clothes, it was *really* hard to limit myself to just buy one.

AFM, this weekend Ethan has another photo shoot. Not sure what I should put him in. I have some cute outfits from gymboree, but I kinda like nake-y baby pictures.... Ethan's going to *hate* me when he's a teenager....

And he slept through the night Sorta. He fussed I dunno, maybe around 3PM or so. I had to give him his binky, hold his arms down, and lean over and shush him. But I didn't have to pick him up and I didn't have to feed him a bottle. So I thikn we're almost there on getting him to STTN again.

 

[lliang_chi]

I meant Ethan woke up at 3AM not 3PM....

So, today DH took the day off (he's got tomorrow off also). And now during his "all day home with Ethan" he has the option of dropping Ethan off at day care. So he does. Today J went on a open water swim, then hung out at the "beach" until he got called to pick up Ethan. Hm... must be nice.

Today DH got called to pick up Ethan because daycare lost power after a particularly heavy storm. Hopefully they'll have power tomorrow. Or maybe they shouldn't so DH can get a sample of spending an entire day home with Ethan... Mwa ha ha!

Posting some pics per Skippy's request:

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Oh my gosh, Ethan is such a cutie!! Look at him holding his bottle!! K loves to hold her bottle, too, but hasn't figure out how to get it in her mouth.

Glad to hear E is starting to STTN again! K's sleep schedule is all over the place right now. She was sleeping from 7:30pm to 4am, then taking a bottle and going back to sleep until 7:30am. Lately she's been sleeping from 7:30pm to 6am, but then she's up and won't go back to sleep. I was trying to keep her on a consistent nap schedule for daycare, but now her naps are shifting again. Blah!

Are you annoyed that J decided to hang out at the beach instead of hanging out with E? I would probably be a little miffed, but at the same time I also know that it must be nice to have a break. I'm glad that he at least had the day off so he could pick E up when the power went out.

Oh, and thanks again for the dress!! It's super cute and I haven't bought anything yet for 6+ months, but with K being so long I think I'll need them soon, so thank you!! I can't wait to see pics from the photo shoot--I love the nakie baby shots, too!

AFU, nothing exciting. K is still loving her solids--we started on bananas this morning and she went bananas over them (ha!).

I'm dealing with some family drama right now, which is always exhausting. Funny how family drama follows you, even when you live 1,500 miles from family. I'm so glad that D and I booked our vacation (with K and the boys). Even though I know that taking a vacation with an infant will require a lot more planning and "stuff" than I'm used to, I think it will be so much fun!

 

[Skippy123]

LC oh my gosh, look at those big brown eyes, what a darling little baby!!! woohoo for E sleeping through the night!!!

NEL, yay for your lo loving bananas! How fun that you and LC and the babies met up! awww too cute for a PS babe romance!

 

[lliang_chi]

NEL! Hooray for Katie loving bananas. Which does she like more, bananas or pears? So cute she was all about the pears and now bananas! I stil haven't tried the rice cereal for Ethan. I'm hoping to get the sleeping under control and then sorting out the rice cereal. I also need to get some baby spoons, maybe I"ll do a BRU run this weekend (I have a $50 gift card). Ethan's nap schedule is all over the place too. Day care usually puts him down between 8:30-10AM and he just has a 30 min nap. I suspect they're putting him down so it's easier for them (moving infants to the other rooms etc), but if he's just sleeping 30 mins, then he should just stay awake and get a longer nap later in the morning.... Oh well, I'm trying to be zen about the whole thing.
TBH, I'm just a little annoyed that J has such an easy go of it on his "Ethan days" because he doesn't go all day. He takes him to day care for like 4-5 hrs. And yeah, we're already paying the tuition so might as well use it, but I guess I'd like him to know what it's like to watch Ethan ALL. FREAKING. DAY. And that he leaves him at day care for so long. I mean Ethan clearly sleeps and eats better at home, so I'd rather have him eating and sleeping well, then have him out of my hair. KWIM?
Oh and the vacationing with an infant, OMG the amount of stuff you pack for them! I'm such a light packer, but dude, when we travel with Ethan, the amount of stuff we have to pack . Diapers, wipes, bibs, spit up clothes, bottles, bottle brush, dish soap (if we're in a hotel), 3 outfits per day, toys, sheets etc. If you want I have a list of stuff I packed when I do any overnights (to my sister's, visiting family, to a hotel).

AFU: Sigh! So the Sleep Gods decided to stick it to me last night. Ethan woke up at 2:30ish, and fussed on and off. I tried to just lean over him for comfort and give him his binky. It'd just tie him over for a few mins. I was pretty engorged at about 2:45ish so tried pumping but of course that's when he decided that he really needed some help going back to sleep so I had to disconnect and pick him up. He fussed for nearly an hr. I finally broke down just around 4:15ish and gave him a little bit off the boob, only a min or two; I already had my shirt off. He eventually went down just after 4:30. Then I took a bottle out and went to bed. He woke up about an hr later. I went to get him, then poked J to get up and feed him so I can sleep some more. This morning I had to break down and get some breakfast (starving) and an iced coffee to keep me up, since I'm SURE i'd be too darn tired.

 

[parrot tulips]

Awww...Katie & Ethan pics would have been too much cuteness!

LC - Sorry to hear about the rough night. Ava has never STTN, but with me not working, it's not a huge deal (I'll sometimes nap with her in the mornings). And I hear you about wishing the dads knew what it was like to care for the babies the whole day (in addition to ALL the night wakings). If only Ava would take a bottle...

NEL - I'm so envious Katie is such a good eater. Ava will still only take the boob. No bottles (when she did, it was only 2-3oz), and refuses solids. As for balancing work and family life, I hope things seem less overwhelming (?) sooner rather than later. I already think working moms are superstars, and Katie seems to be thriving and doing so incredibly well, I'm in awe of how you do it all.

AFU - Ava is doing well. She still wakes for night feedings, but rather than every 3-4 hours, she will give me a 5-7 hour stretch, then another 3-4 hour stretch before waking at around 7-7:30. Her naps are fairly predictable, which is nice. She still refuses the bottle and solids, but she wasn't overly dramatic when DH mushed up a piece of avocado from his salad on the 4th, so we might try giving her some over the weekend. She also went "swimming" for the first time on Wednesday. She fussed a little at first, but then she tolerated being in the water. Didn't love it the way she loves her baths, though. I tried looking into infant swim lessons for her, but some brilliant people without kids must have made the schedules, because ALL of the local lessons start at around 10-10:30am. Right in the middle of most infants' morning naps!

 

[Kunzite]

LC - When you say E is STTN what is his night sleep schedule? I'm a little scared for these guys... O didn't sleep all the way through the night until a few months ago!! It seems like E is exactly like O too. I think M might STTN now if we let him!! I can't fault your DH for taking E to daycare. DH and I are shameless about taking O to daycare if we happen to have a day off. We need a break too!! Cute pictures. I'm jealous E will hold his bottle. O never held his own bottle (do we see a pattern here?!).

NEL - I hope you get things worked out with your work/life balance. It's hard for sure. I'm also jealous of K's sleep schedule. She sounds like an amazing sleeper! Sorry to hear about the family drama. My family is about 1900 miles away too (at least for the next six weeks) and somehow I still end up hearing about all of the family drama too. I'm terrified of moving back for that reason. I just need to be better about shutting it down. Easier said than done, right?

PT - So cool that A got to go swimming! Did you take any pictures? I'd love to see more A!

monnie - I meant to ask if you're cosleeping with A. We don't cosleep, but E was really fussy this morning so I let him sleep next to me for about an hour. When I pumped afterwards I had way more milk than normal. I have a feeling it's because the baby was so close. Just a thought, if you're not already. I hope things are going well for you.

June mommies... where is everyone?? I want to hear about all of the little ones!!


AFU - We got our zygosity results today.... the boys are fraternal! DH immediately said, "So this is your fault!" Ha! I guess it is. I had a feeling they would be because they're so easy to tell apart. Like I said above, E is so much like baby O. It scares me. O was such a difficult baby and I see that repeating in E. He only sleeps about an hour before he wakes up fussy and won't settle. It's exhausting at night. He likes to be held to sleep too. M, on the other hand, would probably sleep through all of his feeds if we let him. He's such an easy little guy so far. I wish they were both that easy, but at least one of them is (so far, I don't want to jinx it).

Here are a few one month pictures. It's easy to see how much bigger M is in these pictures.

 

[lliang_chi]

Kunzite, Ack!!! CUTENESS!!!! Miles does look so much bigger than Elliot, but I'm sure E will catch up in no time I'm glad you have one easy going baby. When I wasn't working, Ethan would sleep about 6 hrs, then wake up at 5ish drink for a bit, go back to sleep, then get up at 7AM again. But I don't think daycare puts him on the same sort of schedule. I thikn he gets there, stays awake, gets fed around 8AM then goes to sleeps for 30 mins, then takes a long nap late morning. Yes, I do'nt really fault DH for capitalizing on day care, but I would like J to experience an all day stretch with Ethan. Hooray for fraternal twins. Sis and I are fraternal

PT, yes, more pictures of Ava!!! She's still on bottle strike??? I hope she'll end up liking cereal or purees soon. Let us know how the avocados go this weekend. Hee hee! Such a cute picture in my head of Ava swimming! Must post pictures of that too (sorry to be so demanding....) And I'm totally like you, jealous of NEL that Katie's such a good eater. Ethan's not the best eater, but the pedi didn't have too much to worry.

NEL, forgot to mention in my last post, but bleh about the family drama. THere's always family drama with us too, and we're pretty far away from them. J and his Sis are back on not talking terms....Or I guess more accurately, decided to remain on not talking terms.

Pancake, how are you doing?

Freke, I'm sure you're checking in, I just wanted to say Hi. Hugs to lovely Miss A, too.

MQ, where have you been? How's Wes? Hope you guys are doing OK.

S&I, How's A doing? Have you guys gotten into a groove yet?

Bobbin, How's Miss C? Hope things are going OK

Monnie, How's BFing going? Kunzite has an interesting theory, it makes sense to me too.

 

[parrot tulips]

LC - Yep, Ava is still on a bottle strike.

Kunzite - Super cuteness! Love the little twin pics.

I was so tempted to buy a cute little girly swimsuit...something fun and flirty with ruffles. But my practical side took over, and since I knew we were going to an outdoor pool, I bought the only one I could find in her size with sleeves (I was terrified of Ava getting a sunburn).

 

[lliang_chi]

PT, Sigh I know it kinda sucks that she's on bottle strike, but LOOK AT THAT FACE! You can't possibly stay mad when you look at those chubby cheeks and your heart just melts. Very practical of you to get A the rash guard & bottom. You can still totally get her a cute flirty swim suit too.

 

[FrekeChild]

Oh I'm still poking around!

Short update on the whole moving sitch:
We will be moving end of August/beginning of September and I am panicking!
1. Going on a house hunting visit beginning of August and I'm freaking out about what to pack for A for a 4 day trip
2. I'm flying with A for the actual move and I'm making my dad and his wife come with me so they can help manage everything for the flights and help with A - she requires a LOT of stuff for just going to someone's house for a couple hours!
3. Moving company is picking up our stuff, and we won't have it at the new place for a good 7-14 days after they pick it up
4. Hubs is driving one of our cars from here to the new place with the dogs, but that means:
a. I'm going to be without him for at least a night=spells trouble for A as she is uneasy when he's not around when she expects him
b. Sometimes he's the only person that can calm her (I'm usually better at it in general, but when I get worn down...)
5. She's going to be sleeping in unfamiliar places and she really doesn't do well with that
6. I'm going to be a SAHM for a while and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet, as I have always either had a job or been in school (or both!) since I was 15.

Aralia has been cleared by the pediatric neurosurgeon, the prosthetics company, the brain sonographer, and the opthamologist, so now bring on the physical therapy 2 times a week! Apparently her plagiocephaly will only be considered cosmetic and she will not require a helmet. The neurosurgeon expects that the permanent asymmetry on the back of her head will be around 3mm, and her hair will cover that up nicely. That pesky torticollis is still sticking around, so that's what's up with the physical therapy.

She's teething again (seems to go in spurts?), but no actual teeth yet. However, this means that she won't take any warm bottles. They have to be straight from the fridge and ice cold. Oy.

Hubs has forbidden bikinis, but I ordered her a tankini for when we go to Hawaii for my BFF's wedding, so he can kiss my booty - 1/2 of an inch of belly skin is not "overtly sexualized".

LC--If you could post a list of the stuff you took for E on your trip, that would be OMG so helpful! I'm freaking out about just the logistics right now!

Loving all of the pictures you guys! Everyone is getting so big! I'm so sad with how fast A is growing...I want her to be little for longer!

 

[lliang_chi]

Freke, Here's the list. Of course it'll be different if where ever you're going to has a crib etc? E.g. if you're going to a hotel, call them ahead of time and ask for a crib & fridge for your baby. But this is assuming you have to bring EVERYTHING.... If you're visiting family or something, you can ask them to buy stuff like wipes, formula, butt cream, etc (noted with '--') before you get there.

10 diapers per day -- (if you have disposables)
wipes --
2 wet bags (I cloth diaper)
Butt cream --
3 Pee pee tee pees
eczema cream/lotion --
hair brush/comb
nail clipper
bath soap --
3-4 wash cloths
2 hooded towels (not totally necessary)
sunscreen
sun hat
swim suit
3 outfits per day
1 pair of socks per day + 2 extra
swaddle blankets (2)
Sleep Sheep/noise machine
4 pacis + lanyard (put this in your diaper bag)
baby monitor
PnP/portable crib
crib sheets/PnP sheets
baby carrier (if you're a baby-wearer)
stroller
car seat + base
4 baby bottles
bibs
bottle brush
pump + parts
formula
Baby Tylenol
Vitamin D supplement (if breast feeding only)
baby food
baby spoons
toys (keep in your diaper bag so she has something to play with on the flight)

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Freke, I totally understand the anxiety around the logistics of moving. I'm struggling enough with just a vacation. BUT you will absolutely get through it and it is temporary.

Do you have any family in the city you're moving to? If so, I think that would solve some of these issues--you could always buy a cheap pack and play, high chair, maybe a go pod, etc. and have it shipped to a family member's house so that you could have it for the 4-day trip and also have it while you're waiting for your stuff to arrive from cross-country. Then all that stuff can stay at the family member's house for when you visit.

If there is no family where you're going, then I'd have DH drive all the stuff you'll need for 7 - 14 days and just use a hotel crib. Or if you need something for a few days, Baby Bjorn is supposed to have a play yard that is super light and great for traveling. You could get away with not having a high chair or bathtub for a day or two, I think. She'll be sitting up pretty well by then.

I know you'll figure it out and you'll be fine. But the move is exciting! And I can totally understand the SAHM issue, but if it were you, I'd just enjoy the time you get to spend with A since you know it won't be forever. And maybe you'll find something you really like..how nice would that be?

And I'm so glad to hear about A's improving plagiocephaly! You must feel relieved. Do you feel like A's improvement with torticollis comes and goes? K was doing great, but the past week or so I feel like the torticollis has regressed despite all of the daily exercises. We're now doing PT every other week and her asymmetry has improved by 2mm over the past month, but this week has been tougher. The PT says that's normal.

Okay, I promise to stop blabbing, but I'm totally with you on the tankini. My DH also said no to bikinis and I agreed, but changing a baby's diaper in a one-piece is insane. I just bought K a tankini--I figured it would be much easier to change her diaper if needed and it's not really a bikini, so win/win.

PT, those cheeeeeeeeks!! EEeeeee, I can't take it! And I totally understand the sleeved bathing suit--it's still super cute. You bring up a great point, though. K's pool is indoors and her swimming lessons will be indoors, but I need more cover up for our trip in September. Babies R Us was having a big sale on all swimwear, I should probably go back. (Like LC, I have a $50 gift card and I need to use it)

So funny how the grass is always greener. I miss nursing so much. K hasn't been loving her bottle lately. She's had a little cough, so I think she's just not feeling 100%.

Kunzite, K is a good eater/sleeper, but not consistent. At least with the sleeping--some nights she's up earlier and it completely throws off her nap schedule. Which would be fine if it weren't for daycare--it just makes things more complicated. The pics of the boys are so cute! I think M might be stealing E's milk

LC, I think K liked the bananas slightly more than the pears. So far she's had pears (like), sweet potatoes (like), peas (didn't like), bananas (really liked) and tonight we started peaches, which she loved. I'm going to try avacadoes next. I mix them all with rice cereal or oatmeal. Let us know how the rice cereal goes! Or even better, show us pics

I can understand the frustration with J. D has had to watch K for a few days on his own and when I get home from work he's visibly frazzled. He genuinely loves to do it, but I know it' hard on him. Plus I think he puts extra pressure on himself because he's afraid of screwing up more than I am. Sorry to hear J's sister is not any more helpful. I'm sure any expectations you had for her are already out the window, though!

I'm going to try to get some more pics tomorrow, I haven't posted any for a bit.

 

[FrekeChild]

LC - that list is fabulous! Thank you! I wish we were going to have someone (family or friends) to help us out, but we're going to be relocating to a completely new city and I know ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. D knows only the people he'll be working with, so it's going to be a huge adventure.

NEL - no family. D has had his new boss invite us to stay with her and her family for the visit, but I don't want to disrupt someone else's life as much as our life is already disrupted with her around, so it's a hotel for us!

She already sits up great, so I'm not worried about bathtubs or highchairs as much as I'm worried about what she's going to sleep in, because she doesn't sleep in a crib still, she still sleeps in the Rock and Play with the ol' incline, and I don't know how I'd manage to take that with us for the visit (maybe put it in a box and check it?). I don't particularly want to buy another one because we plan on weaning her off of it sooner rather than later and I feel like that would be basically throwing money away. As far as a play yard, she already spends a lot of time on her play mat in the middle of the room since she's not really mobile yet, so I would probably just take the play mat with us.

I'd love to find something I like to do. I think what's going to end up happening though is that I'm going to end up going back to school for a Masters. But first I have to get a better grade in my stats class...

I do feel relieved about the plagiocephaly. One thing about the torticollis is that it gets worse and better and totally fluctuates, depending on how she feels each day. If she's teething, she totally regresses. If she's sick, it's even worse. If she hasn't had enough sleep, that's pretty bad too. I'm glad that K is doing better!

I still want a bikini for her! My BFF said "C'mon! It's the one time she can wear a bikini while she's a chunky monkey and not be judged for it!" The only time in my life I ever wore a bikini was when I was 2 years old in Hawaii. I was a competitive swimmer when I was a kid and then when I was older I was too self-concious, so one pieces were all I had. I totally agree about changing a diaper with a one piece. The one time she's gone swimming, that made it a freaking nightmare to change her diaper. I think he should be ok with a tankini though.

PT - I meant to mention that I LOVE Ava's dress in that pic! So cute! And those cheeks!


Anyone else's baby puke when they don't like to eat something? A inherited an easy gag reflex from me, and so far she has activated it when eating: ice cream (TINY amount), green beans, rice rusk, rice cereal (don't blame her, the stuff is gross), a piece of orzo, APPLES (what the heck is wrong with my child?!), can't think of others, but I know there are more.

So far she really likes: peaches, pears, oatmeal/fruit, sweet potatoes, carrots, butternut squash and LOVES bananas and all combinations with bananas. Even apples and bananas. What a weird kid.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Freke, so exciting about the Master's--that's great! And super cute tankini! K also loves anything with bananas. So far, the banana + peach combo is her favorite. I tried giving her a bit of avacodo tonight and she ate it, but with a furrowed brow. Oh, and I'm glad to hear that it's normal for the torticollis improvement to come and go. K has had a cough this week and I think it's the soure of regression.

Any chance of transitioning her out of the RnP before the move, just to make it easier on you? Our physical therapist made us stop using ours and I thought the transition would be awful, but it was fine. I'm sure you can ship the RnP if you need to.

 

[lliang_chi]

Freke, how exciting about the move. Scary and daunting at the same time, but the Masters degree sounds fantastic! What will you pursue? It's very nice of your DH's boss to offer a place for you guys to stay, but I'd probably do the same as you and opt for the hotel. Oh since you're in a hotel you probably won't need stuff like towels, baby monitor etc. Ask the hotel for a crib, and maybe just elevate the feet a little with some books? Does A need a very deep incline or is a slight one OK? Also for the hotel, we used the desk as a changing station. That might or might not work out if your DH needs to use the desk to work. But it's OK if you don't have a changing pad, just ask the hotel for a BUNCH of extra towels and fold up towels as a changing pad. When we were @ my ILs house, we just changed Ethan on the floor with a bunch of towels folded up.

Oh! I forgot to add spit up/burp cloths to the list too! Don't forget that! Bring one for each day!

NEL, Hee hee, so cute Katie loves bananas so much. I guess she wasn't quite sure about the avocados. Aw... Sorry to hear about the torticollis regression but stay the course. Poor K has a cough? Ethan is starting to sound congested again, I'm hoping his cough stays away. I ran a warm mist humidifier when Ethan had his cough a few weeks ago, it kinda helped. But the pedi said the menthol etc add ins don't do anything.

AFU, So we tried rice cereal today. Ethan maybe swallowed two spoonfuls? The rest was ALL. OVER. HIM. I think I might need to feed him in just his diaper for easy clean up. DH thought it was pretty funny. We got some pics, but DH took them after I did the first pass on cleaning him up. We'll continue to try it, I'll pack up a little bit of cereal for day care to try each morning.

 

[pancake]

Hello everyone! I have been so slack, I'm sorry - but I've been reading along and following everything that you've all been doing!

NEL, first of all - don't be so hard on yourself! I think it's difficult because we're brought up to believe that we can have it all, but in reality that's just not possible and some things need to be compromised. I am sure that Katie feels 100% secure in how much you love her and how much she is cared for and her needs are completely met, so you are fine there - but I can understand the emotional tug. In terms of your work performance, I highly doubt that your colleagues have noticed that you're sub-par for your own high standards, and I think in some ways this is all about adjusting to the job being "just a job" now that your priority is being a mother.

Katie is looking gorgeous! Yay for the solids! It's funny how they have such strong likes and dislikes, isn't it?

I hope your family dramas aren't anything too difficult or mind-overtaking.

LC - I have to say, Ethan is such a PRETTY boy! I don't mean that in a pejorative way at all, but he's got such a beautiful soulful face Love the photo with rice cereal drool, priceless. I hope his overnight sleep is continuing to improve again... we're having a bit of a regression too (more at the bottom of this post).

I can understand why you felt frustrated that J put E in childcare. In situations like that with D (although not this particular one), I always find that initially I get really angry because I judge his actions by how I decide on my own - eg. If I were to put S in childcare on my day off it would mean [X], and therefore that is what you are thinking, and I think that is a load of crap so [Y & Z]. Did you guys end up talking about it?

Freke, LC has given you a fantastic list so I won't add to that, but just wanted to say that the worst that can happen is that you leave something behind and have to buy it... so as long as you have the big important (and expensive) stuff, don't sweat the little things. You have enough to think about! A is looking so darn adorable!

Kunzite, they look totally different now, I see what you mean! The test results are not that surprising then, obviously... they are so beautiful. I love seeing them all squashed up together. Do you sleep them in the same crib, or is that too disruptive to M? Fascinating to see that their little personalities and temperaments assert themselves so early on. You sound remarkably chipper for a mother of newborn twins and a toddler - amazing

AFU:

1. Sylvie is a greedy guts and eats pretty much everything. Except avocado, which she enthusiastically accepted for about 5 mouthfuls but then outright refused subsequently (have not had this reaction with anything else). She now eats a couple of tablespoons of fruit in the morning (pears, apples, prunes, bananas, mixtures of the above), yoghurt at lunchtime (she LOVES yoghurt!), mixed vegies (some variation of pumpkin, carrot, broccoli, brussels sprouts, beans, cabbage, whatever else I have in the fridge, I cook it in chicken broth) for dinner. I have cut out all starchy things at the moment as when we first started she got REALLY constipated. Adding prunes to her fruit and cutting out rice/rice cereal and bananas (for the time being) has helped a lot, though. I'm offering water in a bottle, in a sippy cup and on a spoon, but she'll only drink it off the spoon at the moment.

2. We're having a sleep regression! She had started STTN from 6:30pm to 6am-ish with 2-3 solid naps in the daytime, but after about a week she started waking crying at 2:30am, inconsolable without a feed, and her daytime sleep went totally up the spout. Nighttime is improving - she slept from 7pm to 5:15am last night, but her day sleeps the last few days have been problematic. Sometimes sleeping 45 minutes, sometimes unable to sleep at all - for a baby who needs as much sleep as S it's been a disaster! But hopefully on the improve. I think that this regression might be due to...

3. Teething! There is a lot of mouth-picking, red cheeks, chewing on anything/everything, biting (including me - ow!), and it is DROOL CITY around here! I can't feel any teeth about to cut through but I suppose they have to push up through the gums somehow? I didn't really believe in teething causing "teething", if that makes sense, but S is changing my mind! She settled much better each of the last two afternoons after a dose of paracetamol (acetaminophen to States-siders!) and so whether or not it's teething, she's certainly been uncomfortable. Other possibility is a virus as both D and I have had a cold over the last week, but she doesn't have the sniffles or anything.

4. My dad is STILL in hospital (now almost 4 weeks) and things not looking very good. He'll be discharged later this week, but is not being offered any more chemotherapy as his disease has not responded to the 2 cycles he's had, and he's now too weak and deconditioned to tolerate it anyway. We are just focusing on making him as happy and comfortable as possible, and I'm seeing him as much as I can, although not over the last few days as I've got a nasty cold and that is the last thing he needs right now. At the moment the plan is to get him home to his house with carers, but at the stage when he needs full-time nursing-level care, I think I will probably arrange for him to move into a hospice around the corner from my place. I just really want him to have palliative care physicians and treatments at his fingertips, and plus if he is there, we can see him every day and I can spend the evenings with him after S goes to bed, too. My family and I are working through it all... it is difficult but I think we are pulling together and doing as well as can be expected. In some ways the fact that his prognosis is now clearly worse makes it easier to focus on what our priorities for him are (and what our priorities for us are) and I do feel good in some measure that I can contribute to his comfort and contentment.

OK enough doldrums. I will return later with photos of S!

 

[bobbin]

Hi ladies,

I read every day, I have just found it so hard to find time to write up a post!

I can't believe all the February babies are on solids now! It seems like only yesterday I was reading about their births and wishing it was my turn!

Going back and catching up with all the posts seems a bit overwhelming at the moment so I will just do a quick self-centred post:

Charlotte is now 11 weeks old. She is still a very easygoing baby and is still STTN! She is starting to try to grab things, and is really enjoying smiling and interracting with everyone! I love seeing her smile. The best part of my day is when she smiles at me when
I get her up after a nap Closely followed by snuggling in bed with her and feeding her to sleep.

She mostly cat-naps during the day but I see that as a completely worthwhile price to pay for uninterrupted sleep at night. She will occasionally do 3 hour stretches during the day though.

How did you all introduce routines during the day? Charlotte really doesn't seem to have one and I am not sure how to go about introducing one. I don't want to be too strict as I will continue to feed on demand, but predictable nap times would be good!

In-laws have been gone for over a month now and my mum left tonight after staying for 10 days. Every time she leaves I feel really strongly that I want to move back to our home town but it just isn't possible.

I am about halfway through my maternity leave and had been starting to feel really sad about returning to work. I just do not want to leave her and do not feel like she would get the care I can give her in childcare! I never thought I would say this, ever. But last night
I was talking to DH and we kind of agreed that if we got back more than my part time wages for 2 months, then I could delay my return to work until after Christmas when C would be 8 months old instead of 6. Well, we are getting back around $7000 which is way more than my income would be so hopefully we will agree for me to stay at home for longer! I feel really relieved about it. And we have also decided that I will return to work for only 2 days a week instead of 3 at first. Now I just have to run it past my work, but I am pretty confident they will be okay with it.

Finally, a few pictures:

 

[Skippy123]

aww the baby pics are sooooo cute!!!

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Bobbin, that picture of Charlotte giving the fake baby the evil eye is hilarious! Love it! And you can't believe the February babies are already starting solids? Well ME NEITHER! It's craziness!

I would not sweat the schedule at 11 weeks. K didn't start to form a morning mid-day and late afternoon nap until closer to 4 months and even now (at nearly 5 months), it's not an exact schedule. At 11 weeks we were just doing the sleep, eat play routine every 1.5 - 2 hours. She'd sleep for an hour (or less), then eat for 15 minutes and we'd play for about a half of an hour before it was back to sleep.

I'm sorry you're torn about where to live. I can completely relate--I adore my mother and would love to be closer to her, but I just don't have the desire to move back to my home town. It's hard.

Great news about delaying your return to work! I started getting anxious about returning right around the half way point, too. Being able to stay with C until Christmas is amazing! And then only going back a couple of days will help. Even three days is manaeable, but two would be better because it means never having to work two days in a row

Pancake, you are so right about having it all. Not to venture into anything controversial, but I personally do not think I can have it all. For me, something had to give. The quality of my work and the hours I put in have changed. Because they have to. I know that some of my coworkers have multiple nannies in order to put in more hours, but IMO, that is not having it all, either.

Yay for Sylvie eating so well! The only food K has really not liked is avacado as well. It sounds like S is tolerating the yogurt. I was thinking of waiting until 6 months, but maybe I'll start trying at 5. Are you still mixing w/ breast milk or no?

Sounds like S is on the brink of teething! With all of those symptoms, it seems inevitable.

I'm sorry to hear that your father is no longer responding to treatment and that it's time to think about hospice care. I know this has been a long and very tumultuous road for you, but that doesn't mean it's easy when the end is near. How is your mother taking it? Is his family still around? Where is the girlfriend in all of this? Do you think having his hopsice care so close will make it easier for you...or harder (or maybe both)?

LC, cute pic!! Is the rice cereal trial any more successful these days? And how is his cough. When I hear K cough it always makes me feel bad even though it doesn't seem to bother her. I put a cool mist humidifier in her room, but can't really tell if it helps. I also steamed up the bathroom and took her in there for about 10 minutes. I should probably be doing that more regularly.

AFU, nothing new. Our babysitter said that K is really fussy when she puts her down for floor time and that we need to work on letting K be on her own on the floor more. I guess she's right--I tend to run a lot of errands when K is awake. And when we're home and I need her out of my arms, I tend to put her in the jumparoo since she likes that best. So I guess more floor time for us.

 

[bubbly1126]

Hi everyone. Sorry I have been so MIA. Life is crazy these days with a 10 month old. GASP! Did I just say 10 MONTHS? Where has the time gone?? Man, I cannot even express the love I have for my little man. It just grows and grows every single day. Liam is getting bigger by the second it seems and I just can't believe he will be 1 soon. He babbles a lot. And throws tantrums. OMG. I never knew a 10 month old could have such an attitude! He certainly is learning to express himself. I hope this doesn't mean I'm in for it when he is a toddler!

He is still eating level 2 baby food as I have tried level 3 numerous times and he spits it out and gags himself to the point that he throws up. I'm not quite sure if it's the little bits of food that throw him off or the general taste and spices in the level 3. Either way, I'm just gonna keep trying. His ped doesn't feel it's a big deal as he would suggest we wait to feed him level 3 til he gets some teeth anyway. He has mastered the puffs though and he sure does love them!

Speaking of teeth, two are poking through on the bottom FINALLY!! This poor kid. I can tell they are really giving him a hard time! I can't wait to see what he looks like with teeth. Probably like a little man! Ahh!

He goes from army crawling (dragging himself) to normal crawling and back and forth constantly now. AND he pulls himself up on things... thinks he can walk and just tries to take off. Luckily, he is pretty good at catching himself so he never really falls too hard. I'm sure he is gonna be walking soon. Oh my. I'm really gonna be in for it then!

All of your children are so beautiful. Like seriously, I really think PSer's have the best looking babies!

Pancake, I am very sorry to hear of your father but glad that you recognize the time you have with him is precious and you're making the most of it. Sylvie is ADORABLE by the way. Just gorgeous.

LC, the cereal pic is awesome. He is such a little cutie! I remember when I first started feeding Liam food... that was quite the experience! How is it going? Any better?

NEL, K is just too precious. I would definitely agree with your sitter. Floor time is extremely important. But I do get that it's much easier to get things done when we put them in the jumperoo/exersaucer. Liam used to HATE being on the floor, no matter what but now that he has gotten more mobile, oh he just wants to go!

Freke, A is beautiful!! And YES! about the puking when they don't like something. Liam does it! I tell him he is a drama king! haha! I'm glad the issues with the torticollis are getting better!

For anyone I missed, I'm sorry. I'm trying to go back and read and catch up. There just isn't enough time in the day anymore!

Time to go lay down and relax... but here are a few (crappy) cell phone pics of Liam.

 

[pancake]

Bobbin, great to see you posting! C is looking gorgeous, you seem to be having a lovely time together! With naps etc, do you mean schedule or routine? We have never had a schedule (strict or otherwise), but have always had a strict Eat-Wake-Sleep routine from as early as it was possible to institute it. S does have a rough schedule, but a) we didn't decide on it, she seemed to do it herself!, and b) it's kind of a bit up the spout currently while her night sleep lengthens and she's teething. I think part of it does depend on the temperament of your bubba - S is very predictable and routine-driven, and she is one of those "adaptable" babies who pretty much accepts anything and runs with it. I think it would be reasonable to try and get C in the feed-play-sleep cycle and then she will probably regulate herself more as she gets older. At times when S has had funny weeks with sleep etc, it's sometimes ended up as feed-play-sleep-play-sleep-repeat, but the key thing for us was that she had her feed more or less as soon as she woke up, and that she was not fed to sleep.

Great that you were able to shift your return to work!

NEL, I think this age is a bit more of a "don't leave me alone, Mum!" stage actually. S used to be perfectly happy on the floor by herself for ages but at the moment (particularly last week) she would get fussy if I left her alone for more than a few minutes at a time and would stare at me the entire time I was in the room, even if she was being held by someone else.

Re "having it all", I completely agree. It was part of the decision-making process for me about when I went back to work, too... someone told me that you pick the consequences you can best live with, and for me it came down to the fact that I could live with having to slog a bit harder to pick up my career later (and indeed, I can live with not having the career I thought I wanted before I had a baby) but I didn't want to look back in 10 years and wish that I'd devoted myself more completely to this first year of S's life (and my father's last few months, too).

As for yoghurt - to be honest I haven't followed any of the guidelines that are around for starting solids. The new allergy society guidelines in Australia suggest that you can basically offer anything (including "highly allergenic" foods) from around 4 months onwards, and so I've just kind of been playing it by ear. I've not noticed any problems with yoghurt for S and I think she loves the cool, smooth texture in her mouth, maybe because of the teething thing? I don't plan to introduce any cows milk until later though. I'm not mixing BM into her food any more, mostly because I haven't been adding rice cereal as it made her so constipated!

Thanks for your thoughts, as ever, about my dad. The gf is still not doing anything although I think she visits him from time to time. My mother is doing ok although she is having a very tough time as her sister is in the final stages of ovarian cancer. Dad is more or less refusing to see her. Whatever, she only brought up your 3 children, Dad. As far as hospice goes, he's not quite at that stage yet, but when the time does come I think that having him nearby will be the best way to proceed. He and I never had detailed discussions about end of life care, and he doesn't really have the capacity to have those discussions now, but I am working on the principle that it would be nice for him to have his family and friends around him, and moving him near here does facilitate that best.

IHA, thanks for the kind thoughts, I really appreciate it! Liam is SUCH a little spunk! He already looks like a little man I reckon... how gorgeous! 10 months is such a fun age, it is one of my favourite stages in my patients. They have so much to discover at that age and they get so excited by things. You look like you are having a really lovely time!

Here are some quick pics of S...

 

[lliang_chi]

Hey ladies!

Pancake. First off, I'm sorry to hear that your dad's health took a turn for the worse. Although I guess it's best to keep him comfortable and surrounded with people that can make the rest of his life meaningful. I hope his siblings aren't giving you grief (or maybe just that one jerk uncle). In home care would be a great for him. Do you think he'll be open to moving to a hospice when the time comes? I'm sending you tons of good vibes to help you and your family deal with this very tough time.
Sylvie looks adorable! So is it OK to start them on purees and stuff now? Is it OK to do chicken broth too? We have Ethan's 6M well baby next month. Sounds like S's sleep issues could very well be tied to teething. OMG I'm amazed by how quickly our babies are growing up. I'm going to get some baltic amber for Ethan, it's supposed to help with teething pains.
Thanks for the complement for Ethan. I think he's just beautiful and pretty, but dunno how well DH will take to a "pretty" complement. Mostly because DH is DYING to cut his hair, and I always cringe and sniffle when he suggests it... I know if J hears anyone call Ethan a "she", "pretty" or anything effeminate, he's going to take him to for the chop ASAP. Wah
Is S sitting up all by herself consistently now? I see her in your Stokke chair and I'm so impressed!

Bobbin, C's looking so beautiful! I can't believe she's almost 12 wks! I'm glad she's still easy going and STTN. What a good little girl helping out mama. Sounds like you have a great plan to go back to work after Christmas. We didn't force Ethan on a routine, we kind of just stuck with the feed when he wakes, and not use it to put him to bed. Although in the evenings, I'll just feed and let him dose off. So I guess I'm not really following my own plan It is kinda difficult not having the family support, but I think you and your DH are resourceful enough to make it work. How's your DH's job situation? I think it was you back in the preggo thread that had a flurry of retarded-ness late in your pregnancy?

NEL, Ethan also isn't a big fan of tummy time, but he's started getting much better at tolerating it. On Sunday he had a great session because he was able to pull some toys towards him. That kept him distracted from how much he hates tummy time for an extra 10 mins. Maybe K just needs toys to make it more tolerable? Rice cereal update below.

IHA, OMG look at your little man. You have to take a pic of Liam's funny faces when he tries the Stg 3 food. Since you brought it up, what are all the different stages? Sounds like his got quite the spunky personality. Hopefully he'll get it all out now and be an angel as a toddler. One can hope right?

Freke, I also wanted to leave the tip to have at least 4 bottles worth of milk/formula ready while you're traveling. And change A's diaper before getting on the plane. Some airplanes dont' have changing stations in the bathrooms.

AFU:
1) Ethan's been eating all his rice cereal at day care! I've only been giving him with 1oz of breast milk so starting this weekend I'm bump it up to 2 oz. We only give it to him once a day, in the morning, since the pedi said that it can make him constipated. How often do you guys feed your babies cereal?

2) Sleep, he slept like a CHAMP last night! I hope it continues!

3) "having it all" The Atlantic has a really interesting article about it, or about how women CAN'T have it all. I thought it was a great OpEd piece. It's been one of their most controversial and widely read articles in a while. http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2012/07/why-women-still-can-8217-t-have-it-all/9020/

 

[pancake]

LC - don't worry, E is super-boyish, just very beautiful

Re the hospice... I think by the time we get to that stage, Dad won't really have much of an opinion any more. At the moment he's still well enough to voice the desire to be at home, and we only have to hire 24-7 carers for about 3 weeks as my aunt is coming back after that, and at that point we'll hire them a few times a week to give her respite etc, but she'll do most of the caring. I am his medical power of attorney but I know we will get fantastic guidance from his oncologist, who is a wonderful, frank and compassionate doctor. At the moment my siblings and I are holding up pretty well - I think we are all relieved that Dad is not going to have more chemotherapy, because it was really impairing what quality of life he did have and as it turns out, it wasn't delaying the inevitable anyway. This way we can focus 100% on making his days as positive and comfortable as possible.

Yep, it's fine to start them on whatever you like! The guidelines are slowly shifting back towards 4 months and introducing whatever you like whenever you like (including "highly allergenic" foods), exceptions being eg. honey (botulism risk). The literature is still evolving but there is a suggestion that delaying the introduction of solids and particularly the introduction of highly allergenic foods (nuts, eggs, etc) may actually increase the risk of food allergy... but it's not black and white enough for there to be a blanket rule yet. If E is ready/enthusiastic about solids, then go for it! I didn't follow any of the traditional "rules" for introducing stuff - I mixed foods from the beginning and didn't wait 3 days in between, I started twice a day before she got to 2 tbsp per meal, blah blah blah - mostly because I didn't read up before starting But we're 3 weeks in now and S eats essentially everything that she's offered!

S sits well with support now and can occasionally sit without support for a few seconds, but not consistently. She's still a bit wobbly in the Leander chair but is getting there!




I thought the "emotional hormones" were supposed to be gone by now... but I've got the "Baby Dot" playlist playing on the iPod at the moment - it's the playlist that DH made for the hospital - and I have tears rolling down my face