Ready to get married or engaged?

[jaylex]

Date: 8/12/2009 10:07:06 PM
Author:4ever
I''ve been thinking about this abit lately. Are you ladies in waiting eagerly for the proposal because your ready to get married, or waiting for the proposal as the ''next step'' towards marrige?

I think I fall into camp B. BF and I are ready for and looking forwards to the next step towards getting married, but not quite ready to get married yet. So it will probably be a fairly long (2-3 years) engagment. I like taking things slow.

Which camp do you ladies fall into?

I''m def camping out in the "A" tent. Bf and I have been together for a lil over 3 and a half years. I''m so ready to get married but like you, I''m hoping for a rather long engagement. I''d like to be able to hold off until May of 2012 for our wedding. That''ll give us more time to save for it. Plus, I really want to get married on 5-12-2012 b/c we started dating on 12-12-05... It would be really neat to get married on the reverse day (imo)!
but if we won the lottery, I''d get married tomorrow. lol

 

[crossmyfingers]

I think I fall more into Camp A. I want to just go ahead and be married. BF and I have discussed it, and neither of us wants a lot engagement... A few months is enough for us both. We don''t want a wedding, just to get married very privately then later have a party or two to celebrate, and so even wedding planning isn''t an excuse for us to have a long engagement. I''m pretty much ready to get married. Can''t wait!

 

[4ever]

Date: 8/13/2009 11:53:47 PM
Author: jaylex

I''m def camping out in the ''A'' tent. Bf and I have been together for a lil over 3 and a half years. I''m so ready to get married but like you, I''m hoping for a rather long engagement. I''d like to be able to hold off until May of 2012 for our wedding. That''ll give us more time to save for it. Plus, I really want to get married on 5-12-2012 b/c we started dating on 12-12-05... It would be really neat to get married on the reverse day (imo)!
but if we won the lottery, I''d get married tomorrow. lol

Wev''e discussed dates and 2012 seems to be the winner at the moment. 2010 is too soon and 2011 is an odd number (BF dislikes odd numbers. lol)

 

[purselover]

Date: 8/13/2009 7:27:54 PM
Author: 4ever

Date: 8/13/2009 9:38:38 AM
Author: purselover

Date: 8/12/2009 10:07:06 PM
Author:4ever
I''ve been thinking about this abit lately. Are you ladies in waiting eagerly for the proposal because your ready to get married, or waiting for the proposal as the ''next step'' towards marrige?

I think I fall into camp B. BF and I are ready for and looking forwards to the next step towards getting married, but not quite ready to get married yet. So it will probably be a fairly long (2-3 years) engagment. I like taking things slow.

Which camp do you ladies fall into?

I really don''t mean this in any type of snarky way, but I''m just curious what is the point of being engaged if you''re not ready to get married?

It''s not that I''m not ready but that I want to enjoy the engagement as an event itself as the wedding is likely to be a long time after that. We both want a long engagement and I don''t want to rush into wedding planning right when I''ll have left University and be looking for a job and focusing on that. Then there''s getting money for the wedding, sorting out which country we''re going to live in etc. BF is still sorting out exactly what he wants to do in his life. We know we will get married and the wedding will be a while off, so you may think we sould just wait untill the times right to get married....we probably should, but we don''t want to. By getting engaged we promise that we will marry each other, I think that''s enough to tide us over untill all these other things sort themselves out.

Hope that explains it properly? I totally get where your coming from though.

Makes total sense now! I was thinking you meant you weren''t "emotionally" ready, not I need to work out money and other practical things first

 

[Lofi]

I''m excited and ready for both! So probably camp A, but I am looking forward to not rushing the engagement... and being able to enjoy it for a little.

 

[ringless]

I think both. I obviously want that commitment and want to get married! I am very ready.

 

[Dreamer1116]

I just got engaged August 1st. I hve been with my now fiance for nearly 8 years, and I can tell you that I am most definitely in camp B. I am 23 years old and just trying to develop and career and handling school loans I racked up in my four years at DePaul. I am happy to be engaged and just looking forward to enjoying the next 2 or 3 years planning our wedding and enjoying our new engagement.

 

[snogirl17]

I am in the A Camp all the way

We have been dating for 6 years and we have been living together for 5, we have a house together and we talk about getting engaged it is just a matter of time. Just when things start to look up and look like we are turning a corner, we have a flood or loss of job, basic road blocks of life.. so we just have to keep our heads up and good things come to those who wait right??!!

 

[MermaidKelly]

I''m in camp B right now. Boyfriend has made it known that he wants to be ready "like camp A" before engagement...so that kinda sucks for me

 

[gwendolyn]

I didn''t tell J I was ready to get engaged until I felt ready to get married. He''s mentioned more than a few times how sometimes he wishes we could skip over all the wedding crap and just be married already. And most of the time, I agree with him completely! (Although our weddings will be fun.

)

 

[Lozza]

I''m definitely ready for marriage. Bf and I have known for year we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, but we weren''t willing to get engaged until we were ready to be married. We also spent a while deciding whether or not to marry at all, or just be de facto for life. (we''re in Australia where the legally de facto and married are basically the same).

 

[elrohwen]

I''m engaged, but I hope I can answer! I see engagement as the beginning (or formalization) of wedding planning. As soon as I was engaged the planning began, even though I will have been engaged for almost 16 months by the time we marry (I wanted a long time because I know I''m busy and things book up fast here). I''m not really a fan of super long engagements because, if you''re not planning a wedding, why are you engaged? It''s like continuing to date but with a pretty ring. Just my opinion on it.

 

[Winks_Elf]

Date: 8/13/2009 2:04:58 AM
Author: Lilac
I remember being so excited to get engaged as the next step, but only because that meant I was closer to marrying my husband. From the first week we started dating we knew we wanted to get married...

I know exactly what you mean.

Guess it's time for me to post an update.

 

[vc10um]

Date: 8/13/2009 12:36:37 PM
Author: pluck15
I''m definitely in camp A. I''m so ready to be married and be able to live with my SO as his wife. Now, that''s not to say that I won''t enjoy our time being engaged and getting to be ''that happy couple'' and all the parties and such. But if I had to choose, I''d definitely take being married over just being engaged. I want to be with him and start our life and family together. I will be one of those fiances that jumps right into planning the very next day!!!


FF is also in camp A though, so that is a good sign He says he wants to skip all the planning and just go straight to the honeymoon

+1 on this! We already live together and I''m sick of people telling me that I''m "practically married"...I want to be REALLY married! I''ve known since our first date (6/26/0 that he was "the one"...now I''m just waiting for him to find the perfect time, place, and ring, to ask me to make it official!