Krissie
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2007
- Messages
- 1,088
I just want to vent a bit about the troubles we''ve been having with our desired reception venue.
We had selected a gorgeous old hotel near the Cathedral where we''re getting married for our reception. It''s got this huge, opulent ballroom, and we just loved everything about the place. We also thought that having a hotel reception would be great for our guests, many of whom are travelling internationally, because it would be convenient and helpful for the reception to be where they were staying. Once we saw the ballroom and hotel, we knew that was where we wanted our reception to be. That was 2 months ago.
We''ve only received their proposed contract 2 weeks ago, and for the past 2 weeks we''ve been haggling over every teeny detail to try to get the price down to what their wedding coordinator had told us verbally the reception would cost. We''re both lawyers so we know that everything has to be in writing -- and here that''s becoming ever more obvious! In looking at other venues in the area, it became clear their pricing is higher than 99% of the other venues around. Of course, you pay a premium for the history and for the setting, but it''s really seeming excessive. Also, we feel very frustrated with the coordinator. We had told her up front that we were looking at 250 - 260 guests (it has to be that many due to the size of both of our families - we can''t cut back any further); beer and wine open bar; and dinner reception stations (which is their cheapest dinner option). We were told it would come under $x amount. When the estimate came in, it was $7k above that amount (and $5k over our budget which we had told her is the max we can spend).
To be "helpful" she provided us 2 alternatives. Alternative 1 is a brunch reception which must occur only during the hours of noon and 4 -- which won''t work because our wedding at the Cathedral wouldn''t be over until 12:15 if we went for a morning wedding. That alternative comes in at our max budget (but $2k over what she had quoted for a dinner reception verbally). Alternative 2 is a plated chicken dinner with no hors d''oeuvres (our desired reception stations came with hors d''oeuvres). And that alternative is $2k over our max budget (and $4k over what she had quoted for a dinner reception).
We''ve tried pushing back, as she''s known our max budget all along. She''s starting to get snippy, that she''s bending over backwards to accommodate us, throwing in a free cocktail hour, etc. But that doesn''t change the fact that what she''s quoting us is over our budget. Sure we could just throw the extra in ourselves, but there''s so much else to do for the wedding and we''re trying to buy a house, too!
We had been chasing for the contract and in the meantime all of the other super nice venues in the area have been booked up for our date
So we feel a bit over a barrel - our wedding has to be on October 11th, and we have to have space/budget for 250-260 people. We''re both feeling a bit used as well - we''ve been trying to do all of this from London (reception is in the US) and it''s really wearing us both down. I''m starting to feel really resentful and upset that this is happening.
My mom''s friend who is our honorary wedding coordinator has come up with a potential solution. There is a private club near the Cathedral (of course, we''re not members - we would have to find sponsors) that could accommodate our crowd. My mom contacted the club to get pricing, and it''s coming in at $8k less than the dinner stations would come in at our #1 choice of venue ($3k less than our max budget for reception). The difficulty is in finding a member to sponsor us (my parents are going to work on this, as they think they know some members). Also, it''s just a totally different feel from an opulent hotel ballroom.
Don''t get me wrong - it''s definitely a grand setting - but it''s in an old mansion with segregated rooms. In fact, the cocktail hour would be on the first floor, the dinner would be on the second floor, and the dancing would be on the third floor in a ballroom. I''m not particularly adverse to that, as I think it would be good to have guests mingle somewhat. What gives me pause is the main dining room only seats 200, so we would have to have some guests seated in an annex (which I''m assured would be decorated just as nicely). So we''d be going from a huge hotel ballroom that could seat everyone, for an all-in-one experience; versus an old mansion where people are segregated at different bits of the party.
But at those cost savings ... I''m thinking it''s worth it. I''m hoping my friends would understand if we put them in the annex. Heck, I''d even sit in the annex. I''m just having to change my perspective on the whole reception when I thought I had everything sorted out. Being 5000 miles away is making it that much harder. I just haven''t been sleeping well and want this resolved one way or the other -- preferably without blowing our budget.
Ok, that''s my rant done. Thanks for listening - if you made it this far!
We had selected a gorgeous old hotel near the Cathedral where we''re getting married for our reception. It''s got this huge, opulent ballroom, and we just loved everything about the place. We also thought that having a hotel reception would be great for our guests, many of whom are travelling internationally, because it would be convenient and helpful for the reception to be where they were staying. Once we saw the ballroom and hotel, we knew that was where we wanted our reception to be. That was 2 months ago.
We''ve only received their proposed contract 2 weeks ago, and for the past 2 weeks we''ve been haggling over every teeny detail to try to get the price down to what their wedding coordinator had told us verbally the reception would cost. We''re both lawyers so we know that everything has to be in writing -- and here that''s becoming ever more obvious! In looking at other venues in the area, it became clear their pricing is higher than 99% of the other venues around. Of course, you pay a premium for the history and for the setting, but it''s really seeming excessive. Also, we feel very frustrated with the coordinator. We had told her up front that we were looking at 250 - 260 guests (it has to be that many due to the size of both of our families - we can''t cut back any further); beer and wine open bar; and dinner reception stations (which is their cheapest dinner option). We were told it would come under $x amount. When the estimate came in, it was $7k above that amount (and $5k over our budget which we had told her is the max we can spend).
To be "helpful" she provided us 2 alternatives. Alternative 1 is a brunch reception which must occur only during the hours of noon and 4 -- which won''t work because our wedding at the Cathedral wouldn''t be over until 12:15 if we went for a morning wedding. That alternative comes in at our max budget (but $2k over what she had quoted for a dinner reception verbally). Alternative 2 is a plated chicken dinner with no hors d''oeuvres (our desired reception stations came with hors d''oeuvres). And that alternative is $2k over our max budget (and $4k over what she had quoted for a dinner reception).
We''ve tried pushing back, as she''s known our max budget all along. She''s starting to get snippy, that she''s bending over backwards to accommodate us, throwing in a free cocktail hour, etc. But that doesn''t change the fact that what she''s quoting us is over our budget. Sure we could just throw the extra in ourselves, but there''s so much else to do for the wedding and we''re trying to buy a house, too!
We had been chasing for the contract and in the meantime all of the other super nice venues in the area have been booked up for our date
My mom''s friend who is our honorary wedding coordinator has come up with a potential solution. There is a private club near the Cathedral (of course, we''re not members - we would have to find sponsors) that could accommodate our crowd. My mom contacted the club to get pricing, and it''s coming in at $8k less than the dinner stations would come in at our #1 choice of venue ($3k less than our max budget for reception). The difficulty is in finding a member to sponsor us (my parents are going to work on this, as they think they know some members). Also, it''s just a totally different feel from an opulent hotel ballroom.
Don''t get me wrong - it''s definitely a grand setting - but it''s in an old mansion with segregated rooms. In fact, the cocktail hour would be on the first floor, the dinner would be on the second floor, and the dancing would be on the third floor in a ballroom. I''m not particularly adverse to that, as I think it would be good to have guests mingle somewhat. What gives me pause is the main dining room only seats 200, so we would have to have some guests seated in an annex (which I''m assured would be decorated just as nicely). So we''d be going from a huge hotel ballroom that could seat everyone, for an all-in-one experience; versus an old mansion where people are segregated at different bits of the party.
But at those cost savings ... I''m thinking it''s worth it. I''m hoping my friends would understand if we put them in the annex. Heck, I''d even sit in the annex. I''m just having to change my perspective on the whole reception when I thought I had everything sorted out. Being 5000 miles away is making it that much harder. I just haven''t been sleeping well and want this resolved one way or the other -- preferably without blowing our budget.
Ok, that''s my rant done. Thanks for listening - if you made it this far!
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