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Returning to work after Short Term Disability

Begonia said:
I'm set to return to work after short term disability. I herniated/reherniated my L2L3 disc, altho without imaging we can't be sure. Imaging has been ordered but is so slow to get in the health care system I'm in. I've considered going private altho, I am on the mend. There have been flare ups amd set backs which I'm told are normal and to be expected. Along with that I have osteoporosis and am a chronic back pain survivor. The origin of the pain was a work place accident that left me with a chronic back problem. I did not win my claim against the behemoth company I work for and our version of Workers Comp. The company had lawyers and I did not. I had to be represented by my union.

I've been in contact with my employer HR dept throughout and, being under a doctor and physio care, have plenty of documentation to back me up.

Yesterday I forwarded on my latest EMA (employee medical assessment) as completed by the doctor, indicating I would be starting a slow and gradual return to work. The HR lady's emails sent some very mixed messages ranging from "it's great you're on the mend and ready to return" (several like that) to the last being "this work environment may put you at risk despite your best efforts".

She's not wrong. My work environment is fast paced and physically challenging at times, and perpetually understaffed. I have no options left to move within the company and there is alot of pressure on me to make this work.

I've been off for 7 months. 2 were a worksafe claim where I had frozen shoulder, 1 month was my vacation block. Near the end of my block, I experienced symptoms of herniation as I'd been exercising and conditioning to return to work. I was devastated that it happened and scared what it would mean in terms of employment. Fortunately STD kicked in and I was able to pay my bills. I'm still recovering and physio, my doc and I feel I can do a very gradual RTW. Then, that statement in the email. I'm trying not to let it undermine my confidence but am wondering if it's a gentle heads up I'm about to be in a fight to keep my job.

Going back to work after being off for so long is hard. Physically, yes, but emotionally I'm struggling. I need this job as I have very few marketable skills and it pays above what I can make otherwise, along with the benefits

I'm forging ahead with the plan and hoping to hear from the HR support team about my GRTW. If they become more insistent that I'm unsuited for that environment, I'll get my union involved. There's plenty of precedent to show others have been hurt and off work on STD more than once (as have I).

It's a lot to deal with the past few days and I'm quite stressed.
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@Begonia - I get it. I went out on STD three times (for 90 days each time) for spinal surgeries. I won’t get into a lot of detail but I’d suggest doing 1/2 days for a week or two. And take your breaks, do your exercises even at work, etc. it’s hard to get back into it. Take care of you.

P.S. Ultimately I had to take LTD because I couldn’t do my law job anymore. But I had other disabling conditions too.
 
caf said:
@Begonia - I get it. I went out on STD three times (for 90 days each time) for spinal surgeries. I won’t get into a lot of detail but I’d suggest doing 1/2 days for a week or two. And take your breaks, do your exercises even at work, etc. it’s hard to get back into it. Take care of you.

P.S. Ultimately I had to take LTD because I couldn’t do my law job anymore. But I had other disabling conditions too.
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So sorry to hear of your disabling issues! I'm so sure you know exactly what I'm going through. Sigh.

I've done return to work (RTW) in the past, neatly tucked into 1 month of 4 hours, 6 hours and then 7.5 (length of my work day). I can't tuck this one into a month as I've been off so long, so it'll be 4 hours/day for the first month, and then we shall see. If all goes well, the second month will be divided into 6 and then 7.5 hours. My short term disability will run out before I'm done with RTW so I've applied for LTD.

So nervous as I strained my back at physio this week. I knew those d@mn RDL's were gonna be dodgy, and now this! I'd intended to start back on the 19th, but no confirmation from work yet, so we'll see. I'm having to take a break from exercising until the back settles - not ideal.

I take comfort from knowing graduated return to work is... graduated. My doctor put on very conservative limitations, so mainly it will be about adjusting to the 30 minute drive each way, the 20 minute walk and being on my feet over a 4 hour shift. Plenty of micro breaks for the first while.

Sorry to ramble, but it helps to talk about it. My anxiety is thru the roof suddenly.
 
Begonia said:
So sorry to hear of your disabling issues! I'm so sure you know exactly what I'm going through. Sigh.

I've done return to work (RTW) in the past, neatly tucked into 1 month of 4 hours, 6 hours and then 7.5 (length of my work day). I can't tuck this one into a month as I've been off so long, so it'll be 4 hours/day for the first month, and then we shall see. If all goes well, the second month will be divided into 6 and then 7.5 hours. My short term disability will run out before I'm done with RTW so I've applied for LTD.

So nervous as I strained my back at physio this week. I knew those d@mn RDL's were gonna be dodgy, and now this! I'd intended to start back on the 19th, but no confirmation from work yet, so we'll see. I'm having to take a break from exercising until the back settles - not ideal.

I take comfort from knowing graduated return to work is... graduated. My doctor put on very conservative limitations, so mainly it will be about adjusting to the 30 minute drive each way, the 20 minute walk and being on my feet over a 4 hour shift. Plenty of micro breaks for the first while.

Sorry to ramble, but it helps to talk about it. My anxiety is thru the roof suddenly.
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i hope the people whom you work closest to physically are sympathetic and helpful
 
Daisys and Diamonds said:
i hope the people whom you work closest to physically are sympathetic and helpful
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Here's hoping. I work in a toxic union environment and my boss would dearly love to surround himself with 30 year old males with strong backs, whereas I'm a 58 year old female with structural issues. I was fine until I got hit by a broken metal fire door. Sigh. I'll give it my best shot and keep in my bubble. Or try to.
 
Begonia said:
Here's hoping. I work in a toxic union environment and my boss would dearly love to surround himself with 30 year old males with strong backs, whereas I'm a 58 year old female with structural issues. I was fine until I got hit by a broken metal fire door. Sigh. I'll give it my best shot and keep in my bubble. Or try to.
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i dont understand sexism from the younger generation, how did that happen ?
im sorry it does not sound like the union as a whole is not a surportive enviroment
 
Begonia said:
So sorry to hear of your disabling issues! I'm so sure you know exactly what I'm going through. Sigh.

I've done return to work (RTW) in the past, neatly tucked into 1 month of 4 hours, 6 hours and then 7.5 (length of my work day). I can't tuck this one into a month as I've been off so long, so it'll be 4 hours/day for the first month, and then we shall see. If all goes well, the second month will be divided into 6 and then 7.5 hours. My short term disability will run out before I'm done with RTW so I've applied for LTD.

So nervous as I strained my back at physio this week. I knew those d@mn RDL's were gonna be dodgy, and now this! I'd intended to start back on the 19th, but no confirmation from work yet, so we'll see. I'm having to take a break from exercising until the back settles - not ideal.

I take comfort from knowing graduated return to work is... graduated. My doctor put on very conservative limitations, so mainly it will be about adjusting to the 30 minute drive each way, the 20 minute walk and being on my feet over a 4 hour shift. Plenty of micro breaks for the first while.

Sorry to ramble, but it helps to talk about it. My anxiety is thru the roof suddenly.
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I’m sorry. I hope my post didn’t make you anxious. Just go slow and steady. You can do it!
 
caf said:
I’m sorry. I hope my post didn’t make you anxious. Just go slow and steady. You can do it!
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No no. Not your post, not at all. I'm just talking out my fears.
 
Daisys and Diamonds said:
i dont understand sexism from the younger generation, how did that happen ?
im sorry it does not sound like the union as a whole is not a surportive enviroment
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No, it surely isn't. Ironic that the union collective agreement can "protect" you but the environment is toxic.

I can only imagine others stories of workplace toxicity... I'm in good company.
 
Begonia said:
No, it surely isn't. Ironic that the union collective agreement can "protect" you but the environment is toxic.

I can only imagine others stories of workplace toxicity... I'm in good company.
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i could tell you one or a thousand and twenty
 
Thinking of you Begonia and sending you good thoughts. Please keep posting if its helping you deal with the anxiety. I’m sorry you are going thru this. I’m hoping you get some good news next week and you are able to gradually ease back into your job at a rate you feel comfortable with. You can feel your anxiety in your posts. Is there anything we can do to help you?

@Daisys and Diamonds, We are all lucky to have you here.
 
Hi @Begonia, following your journey on this thread. Hopefully you will hear from work soon to give you some resolution. I know you said in an earlier post that you have been trying to follow a work day of sorts for your stamina. Has this included the car travel that you mentioned for work? If not maybe you could do some driving for the next few days while you are waiting to hear from work to improve stamina in that aspect.
 
CMN said:
Hi @Begonia, following your journey on this thread. Hopefully you will hear from work soon to give you some resolution. I know you said in an earlier post that you have been trying to follow a work day of sorts for your stamina. Has this included the car travel that you mentioned for work? If not maybe you could do some driving for the next few days while you are waiting to hear from work to improve stamina in that aspect.
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Good idea!

I have been traveling by car but not that exact amount ×2 in that time frame. I'll give that a go today, and every day.

Putting on the nasty no slip runners as well. My back is shoe sensitive.
 
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Calliecake said:
Thinking of you Begonia and sending you good thoughts. Please keep posting if its helping you deal with the anxiety. I’m sorry you are going thru this. I’m hoping you get some good news next week and you are able to gradually ease back into your job at a rate you feel comfortable with. You can feel your anxiety in your posts. Is there anything we can do to help you?

@Daisys and Diamonds, We are all lucky to have you here.
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Talking to you all is so helpful. Like a village rooting for me! Thank you @Calliecake and everyone.

Anxiety... yeah. I do a lot to settle it, but occasionally it's so much harder, like now. My trauma brain doesn't help ya know?

The listening and encouraging and pro tips are wonderful.
 
Had a bad twinge this morning on the way to the pool and I'm in pain and spasming.

Made an appointment with my doc for Wednesday. I doubt I'll be ready to start back on Thursday, even if HR gives me the go-ahead. I'm scared and disappointed. I'll push further for an MRI when I see him Wednesday.
 
I'm just gonna say it.

I've delayed going back to work until the pain has lowered, after some emails with HR. I was both frightened inside, and... extremely relieved when the delay was approved.

The pain is 70% better today. Healing? Coincidence? Sure, but I'm not in denial about the psychological aspect here as the physio and I spent a few weeks studying the psychology of pain (book called Explain Pain). As a chronic back pain survivor, I'd likely have the framework of increased pain sensors in my nervous system. My brain did not perceive me to be safe = painful twinge and spasming back muscles. I'm still going to ask for an MRI tomorrow however.

I'll discuss this with my care providers today and tomorrow. I was so very upset this weekend about the cryptic response from HR and it is known that cortisol and the stress soup can increase pain. I get hyper sensitive with my company as... well... difficult past experiences, combined with being off 7 months. I knew it was gonna be a tough sell emotionally.

Not too sure where to take this but I'm so d@mn glad that at this moment the pain is down considerably.
 
I’m glad your pain is better right now @Begonia. You have been under a tremendous amount of stress this past week. I'm hoping you can relax a little now that your return to work date has been delayed. Please take good care of yourself.
 
I am so sorry you are dealing with this. The unknowns are so frightening. Glad to hear your additional time off was approved.

Hope you feel better soon.
 
Calliecake said:
I’m glad your pain is better right now @Begonia. You have been under a tremendous amount of stress this past week. I'm hoping you can relax a little now that your return to work date has been delayed. Please take good care of yourself.
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This is so true and very validating to have someone else say it. Thank you for that!

I'll relax a while and then get back on the horse and try again.
 
MMtwo said:
I am so sorry you are dealing with this. The unknowns are so frightening. Glad to hear your additional time off was approved.

Hope you feel better soon.
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Me too. Me. Too.

A bit of downtime and then I'll start strategizing, starting with the alarm response I have to certain emails from HR.

It helps to talk here and not be shamed. Thank you for that! I just had an unrelated appt and the provider asked "are you allergic to work"? Not too sure of her intention but I felt shame. I'll work on that too. Again.
 
Ugh that remark is uncalled for! No doubt you’d rather be working and this is an upsetting time.

I just started a new job due to the stress responses from the old gig. I literally started talking with someone to work on my high stress reactions. I feel for you. Out of this I bet you’ll look back from a better, calmer place soon.
 
MMtwo said:
Ugh that remark is uncalled for! No doubt you’d rather be working and this is an upsetting time.

I just started a new job due to the stress responses from the old gig. I literally started talking with someone to work on my high stress reactions. I feel for you. Out of this I bet you’ll look back from a better, calmer place soon.
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I have so few marketable skills, and being 58, I get overwhelmed with the search, but for the first time (in a long time) I'm going to start. I'll use the next few weeks to flex my job search muscles. It's time. Maybe there's a safer place out there for me, waiting.
 
Okay.

The physio and I jad a good
MMtwo said:
My dearest lady, I am sure this feels so formidable right now, but I promise you we do not get to 58 without life skills! :) Sending a hug your way. If you want resume help, holler at me on LT. I am happy to assist in any way I can, or just be moral support. https://loupetroop.com/listings/other/mmtwo-contact
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Thank you. Thank. You.
It feels so very formidable but far less lonely now!
I'll search you out in a few hours :)
 
Had a long talk with my physio and she did every neurological test she has. I was fine throughout. So, we are leaning toward the psychology of pain, as I had gotten so very worried this past weekend. The stress soup may have triggered a pain response.

Here's the plan: I'm going to delay starting back for 5 days. Firstly, I have to allow HR to get their crewing ducks in a row. Secondly, my physio and I are going to formulate a detailed plan of what to do in the case of this, or in case of that (my fears essentially). A trouble sheet.

Lastly, I'm to visualize those movements that have caused pain (and flare ups) in the past to desensitize me. I've been doing this on and off but that's my homework for this week. I just did a few of my physio exercises (that went well), and I'm back to the pool tomorrow.

Getting back on the horse.
 
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Begonia said:
Me too. Me. Too.

A bit of downtime and then I'll start strategizing, starting with the alarm response I have to certain emails from HR.

It helps to talk here and not be shamed. Thank you for that! I just had an unrelated appt and the provider asked "are you allergic to work"? Not too sure of her intention but I felt shame. I'll work on that too. Again.
Click to expand...

I don't know why you were with this provider, but a comment like that is so rude, I think I'd find a different provider for that service.
 
Lookinagain said:
I don't know why you were with this provider, but a comment like that is so rude, I think I'd find a different provider for that service.
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As an INFJ sensitive gal, I just can't imagine saying something like that to another. Then my alter ego comes out and I just wanna throat punch her.
Oh whoops. Outside voice.
 
Begonia said:
I'm just gonna say it.

I've delayed going back to work until the pain has lowered, after some emails with HR. I was both frightened inside, and... extremely relieved when the delay was approved.

The pain is 70% better today. Healing? Coincidence? Sure, but I'm not in denial about the psychological aspect here as the physio and I spent a few weeks studying the psychology of pain (book called Explain Pain). As a chronic back pain survivor, I'd likely have the framework of increased pain sensors in my nervous system. My brain did not perceive me to be safe = painful twinge and spasming back muscles. I'm still going to ask for an MRI tomorrow however.

I'll discuss this with my care providers today and tomorrow. I was so very upset this weekend about the cryptic response from HR and it is known that cortisol and the stress soup can increase pain. I get hyper sensitive with my company as... well... difficult past experiences, combined with being off 7 months. I knew it was gonna be a tough sell emotionally.

Not too sure where to take this but I'm so d@mn glad that at this moment the pain is down considerably.
Click to expand...

seems like its safe to send dear Begonia a group hug
1726706296448.jpeg
 
Begonia said:
Me too. Me. Too.

A bit of downtime and then I'll start strategizing, starting with the alarm response I have to certain emails from HR.

It helps to talk here and not be shamed. Thank you for that! I just had an unrelated appt and the provider asked "are you allergic to work"? Not too sure of her intention but I felt shame. I'll work on that too. Again.
Click to expand...

f'ing bas*ards
send me their address and i'll send a bag of goodies from Fluffy's dirt box !
 
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