Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is gone

[Amber St. Clare]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

When I was young I used to go visit my grandparents during one of my week breaks during the school year. I loved being with them, they were a lot of fun. Grandma taught me how to embroider and play cards. To this day I play a mean game of gin rummy. We would garden when the weather permitted and we would always end up at the corner Italian restaurant on Fridays and Schraft's on Saturday afternoon after shopping at Bamberger's. Grandpa was a quiet guy, but very loving. I'm 64, they have been gone for 40 years and I'm crying as I type this.

My BFF Bessie has been gone for 36 years. We used to take our lunch to the steps on the NY Public library and look at the hot guys. We were really close. She held my hand during my divorce, kept me as sane as possible. I was with her all thru her cancer, right til the end. I still miss her like crazy. I've made other friends along the years, but it's not the same at.all.

crap, now I have to go cry in the corner. in a good way.

 

[rinkyb]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

My favorite memories are of my maternal grandmother. My mother was a working mom and could not handle both her preemie twin baby girls. So, my grandmother stepped in and raised me single handed until I was 8 years old. As a child I thought she was my mother. She was beautiful, articulate and smart. She regretted never having a college degree, so she enrolled herself in college when my mother was in elementary school and managed to graduate with Honors! She was an avid reader, sometimes reading the same book multiple times as she had run out of books to read. She loved music and loved food, although she hated cooking. She was also a fabulous self taught pianist and our childhood afternoons were spent with her playing a song and us cousins competing to see who could identify it first!

My most vivid memories are of her wearing her crisp cotton saris and dousing herself in baby powder, which she loved! She would pour it all over herself and it would cover her room and bed. Even to this day, the smell of baby powder reminds me of her. She passed away in 2003 from a massive heart attack while drinking her morning tea (another one of her habits)...she looked so peaceful that we all thought she had passed out, or fallen asleep. She always said she did not want to be put in the hospital and had a mortal fear of needles and we all say that it was her way of making sure that no one of us could put her through any of that!!

 

[missy]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

TooPatient, Amber and Rinky, thank you for sharing those sweet and poignant memories. I am so glad you have such wonderful memories to remember your loved ones. We always have them in our hearts. (((Hugs))).

 

[VRBeauty]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

My friend Don, who passed away earlier this year, was my go-to person for things automotive for thirty-plus years - whether the issue was one that needed fixing or just commiserating. When I put a dent in the rear bumper of my (then) precious MINI, by backing right into a very stationary pole, I thought I just wanted some commiseration and maybe a bit of help thinking through the next step. My MINI was getting on in years, it was not exactly in pristine shape since I tend to be hard on cars, and I wasn't sure I wanted to pay for a new bumper. Enter Don, to the rescue! He had read somewhere that you could coax dents out of rubber bumpers if you first soften them with hot water. So one sunny afternoon I parked my car in his driveway, and he boiled up a bunch of water and set to work. He figured out a way to reach inside the bumper with a mallet - so I'd pour water, he'd pound, I'd pour more water, he'd pound some more... we were having fun and the across-the-street neighbors were enjoying the spectacle! And... it did the trick! The damage wasn't nearly as visible and I decided to I could live with a slightly marred bumper.

When it came to replacing my cars, Don - to his credit - pretty much refused to get involved. He'd listen to my musings, but basically told me he'd be happy to go on a test drive with me when I had it narrowed down to one or two cars. When I was ready to buy my the car I have now, he pointed out problems with its ratings - but I had anticipated that and had done my homework, and was able to tell him why I was going to buy the car in spite of a less than stellar rating. Because of his hands-off approach I ended up with cars that I was enthusiastic about, rather than just cars that would do the job. (And when I managed to - uhm - dislodge the front bumper of that car, and we ended up using dish soap to coax it back into place, well, that made for another frustrating but fun driveway moment. )

 

[WinkHPD]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

Thank you all for sharing some of your precious memories.

I have so many that it is hard to choose, so I will share this one since it revolves around jewelry.

When my daughter Cissy was little, she loved to go to Grandma's house and play in her jewelry box. My mom had a fairly big glass box at least 5 x 7, probably more like an 8 x 6 and two or three inches deep. It was filled to the brim with costume jewelry, big gaudy earrings, pendants and even some multi stone rings, all of them of larger sizes of stones and of various colors.

Most were rhinestones and others just colored glass. Clip on style earrings, not pierced so the mountings were pretty big and must have hurt like heck to wear them.

One day, while Cissy was pawing through the box looking for the perfect pair of earrings, I went into the kitchen where mom and Resa, my wife, were sitting over a cup of coffee.

"Mom, where did you get all of that costume jewelry?" I asked. (I was thinking "junk" jewelry and I hope I did not actually say that!)

"From you, when you were a little boy up until you were in your mid teens."

Suddenly up came all the memories of me going into the drug store across from my Dad's office and spending hours and hours picking out just the right pair of earrings, or a pendant to match the earrings I had already gotten for her. Memories from when I was fairly small, maybe eight or nine, right up to the times when I was old enough to ride my bike the four or five miles away from home to make my choices. Never had I any idea just how much of it I had gotten, three to five dollars at a time for most of it, although I distinctly remember having to borrow money from my dad once to get her an eleven dollar cluster that was truly astonishing to me.

We sat and talked. If asked, I might admit that I rained a little, for a man isn't supposed to cry. She told me how much she loved them and wore them when I was younger and how I always glowed when I saw her wearing them when she and dad were going out. Now that she had so many granddaughters, she wanted them to always to be able to wear them and treasure them while they were playing grown up.

It was a wonderful moment for me, and it taught me that one man's "junk" might be someone else's absolute treasure. I think those sojourns to countertop display of costume jewelry was the beginning of my journey to becoming a jeweler. I know I will always cherish this, among many other, memories of my mother and her loving kindness.

Wink

 

[KaeKae]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

Wink,
Thank you for sharing your story of your "precious" gifts to your mother and how she treasured them!


Though a different story, it reminded me of the years following my grandmother's passing (Nanny.) As the youngest granddaughter, I received a couple precious jewelry pieces, but it was the costume jewelry and scarves that I enjoyed the first years after she died. Even at eleven, I wasn't too old to play in her jewelry box and dresser drawers. I would find myself playing dress up with those treasures. And now, in a link to my earlier post about her ( and Mom's and Aunt J's scents) I realize that I not only connected those things with her, but also how the scarves, especially, SMELLED like Nanny. Oh, the memories. Still, to this day, I can smell that scent, in my mind.

 

[monarch64]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

Wink, that is such a cool story! My brother used to buy costume jewelry for my mother, but he never became a jeweler. I love the thought of a son going to so much trouble to please his mother, and the mother cherishing the things and keeping them safe for someday he might want to relive those memories. How special!

I sadly have another contribution to this thread. My great-aunt died 2 days ago and she is the last of 3 sisters and my dad's immediate-ish family is shrinking as both of his parents are gone and now all their siblings (all of his aunts and uncles of which there were many.)

This great-aunt of mine was married to a guy who loved antique cars. They were both really quiet little old southern people and I don't remember much of my interactions with her other than trying not to break anything in her house since most of her things were glass. But. He always had something he was restoring or tinkering with, and when he had them finished they were quite beautiful and very fun to look at and ride in! He and my great-aunt used to take my brother and me for rides in one of his cars that had a rumble seat on the back end. We were just little kids, so we fit in it, but they would take us out on the HIGHWAY like that and that would NEVER in a million years fly today! I wish I had pictures of us on my hard drive, but all the snapshots are in my mother's house so here is a similar picture:

 

[missy]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

Aww Monnie thank you for sharing such a lovely memory with us and I am so sorry for your loss.

 

[monarch64]

Re: Share a share a happy memory or 2 of a loved one who is

Aww Monnie thank you for sharing such a lovely memory with us and I am so sorry for your loss.

Thank you, Missy. She and I were never close but I have happy memories of her and my great-uncle. I just feel so sad for my dad. He really took my grandmother's death very hard two years ago and that's the last funeral I've attended with my parents so I am feeling pretty anxious about the service tomorrow. I will get through it, but our family's funerals are sort of long, traditional, and preachy affairs depending on the ahem, orator. Guaranteed there will be a 5 minute eulogy and 25 minutes of proselytizing which is 25 minutes of me trying not to squirm in my seat.