should a girl feel proud to own a Tiffany e-ring?

[bootsiekin]

Hello,

I am brand new to this site, but your forum kept coming up when I did internet searches. I got engaged almost a year ago and it was a complete surprise. I didnt get to drop any hints about what kind of ring I wanted, and he bought it completely on his own with no input from anyone. Its from Tiffanys: its the RB with 10 channel set RBs in the band. My center stone is 0.57C (VVS1 and F color) and the 10 RBs total 0.24 for a TCW of 0.82. I really like the style of the ring, and we got the matching half-circle bead-set wedding band to match. I still dont know why he went to Tiffanys..I had never set foot in that store or owned any other jewelry from them. I am not the girl to go gaga over the little blue box. He said he simply wanted the "best quality" and didnt think I would be very flashy and want a large stone. Of course he was mistaken..either that or didnt think about a VS2 looking almost identical to a VVS1 and being a considerable amount of money less. He went to some other stores and quickly realized Tiffany carried the highest quality stones, so he just bought from there. He does not have a high paying job, and spent more than the "two months salary" so I know I should be very happy. However since being engaged I now look at everyones rings (I am a poor graduate student, but live in a very wealthy Philadelphia (the main line) neighborhoood) and realize I could have had a much larger stone if some of the quality had been sacrificed - which is probably what I would have done if I had been deciding where to spend $8k. I am not sure what the details of Tiffanys upgrade program are, but at the same time I would want to keep the ring I was proposed to with. Not that at the time he offered to get something else if I wanted it, but its just been bothering me recently because one of my friends just got engaged and got to pick her ring herself and it is a lot larger than mine, albeit lesser quality - I dont know the exact specs.)

Any suggestions on options or reasons I should feel lucky to have a ring from Tiffanys? Does it look very tiny on my hand?(sorry this post is so long..) Thanks in advance for your advice! (I will attach a pic - my finger is a 4.75)

Also maybe this could help any guys out there wondering if they should buy from Tiffanys...if you do, at least give her the option to return within the 30 days without making her feel bad about it..

 

[pumpkn888]

Hi! I am brand new to this site too, and am having my own struggles... but I guess I have a few thoughts on how you''re feeling.

1. Don''t get so caught up in the token, and remember what it represents.
I have been with my boyfriend for almost 9 years. Only in the last few weeks has he seriously considered buying a diamond. We''ve looked here and there, but, I''m the one who has been doing all the research, all the looking, AND all the evaluating since everyone around us has gone from single to married to kids while we''ve been idle...(I will skip the rant), so while I completely understand your feelings, I do think you have a lot to be thankful for. First of all your ring is very nice and I think the quality is what makes it look bigger than the .54 carats or whatever you said it was. I just posted about a 2.0 carat not having the best cut, and I think truthfully, having a nicer diamond is better than having a larger one. And the quality will show itself as time goes by and your ring gets dirty, etc. so Ive been told anyway. But it definitely makes a ring look bigger when the quality is better.

2. How much does it really matter?
I have been talking a lot to my friends about their rings, and to be honest, none of them seem to know the specs, or care. They look at their rings and love them, but they don''t seem to think its a really big deal. Maybe your feelings about this will pass over time?

3. You can always upgrade:
If you are really unhappy, see if you can find a stone that''s not too much more expensive and see if you can upgrade. Maybe reserve some of your wedding budget to go towards a bigger ring. Or, maybe wait until your 10 year anniversary and get one then.

Bottomline, to me, is you should be happy with your ring since you have to live with it, and wear it every day, but don''t let what other people have or think persuade your thoughts/feelings or make you feel like it means less or is less in any way. Your ring is an expression from your fiance and its a symbol of his love for you. Try to think of that when you look at it, instead of its vanity qualities, or what everyone else might be thinking.... Tiffany''s is a great company and their reputation speaks volumes.

 

[lovegem]

Hi Bootsie.
First of all, no, your stone don't look small on your finger. It looks very nice actually. very elegant and charming.

2nd, feel lucky that your bf wants the best for you and he will continue to do so.

3rd, don't feel bad that your stone isn't as big as other people's. Be glad that it is a tiffany.

4th, what's done is done. Look forward to your 5th anniversary. Hopefully by that time you will finish school and got more money, then... you can buy whatever you want.

Cheers.

 

[sonnyjane]

I know you feel a little confused about why he went to Tiffany''s without asking you, etc... but think of it this way... most guys (with the exception of those on this board) are pretty clueless when it comes to jewelry. All they know is that in every movie and on every TV show, the "dream guy" goes to Tiffany''s to get the "dream ring" and the girl always brags. I''m sure he just wanted to surprise you and thought getting you a high quality stone from Tiffany''s would be the absolute best way to spoil you, so be happy he cared so highly for you and didn''t buy your ring from a pawn shop If it really bothers you, go for lower quality larger size, but I do think it''s a lovely ring. I have a lower quality stone (H, SI1) but really like it b/c it''s 1.01 ct

I will agree though that you have a much smaller finger than me (6.5) and that your stone does not look small on your finger

 

[jstarfireb]

It sounds like he really wants the best for you, even if some of his intentions ended up being misdirected (i.e. thinking that "quality" means F/VVS1)! He''s right that Tiffany''s carries well-cut, beautiful stones. And the ring looks really great on your hand. You''re fortunate to have a small ring size; I would have guessed that stone was closer to .8 or so just by looking at the picture.

Do I think he overpaid? Sure, Tiffany''s has a huge markup, and he also could have gone down in color/clarity to get a larger stone. But his intentions were good, the ring looks fantastic on your hand, and it''s guaranteed to be a nice, sparkly stone. For someone who probably doesn''t know a whole lot about diamonds, he chose a beautiful ring.

If you''re still in the 30-day return period, I would certainly have an honest conversation with him and see if he would be open to taking it back and looking for a bigger and lower color/clarity stone with you. Otherwise, I think you really have a beautiful set! And you have some room to grow if you would like to upgrade later on.

(BTW, I just moved to a very nice area in Center City Philadelphia, and I can''t believe how expensive the cost of living is here! I wouldn''t be surprised if we live pretty close to each other.)

 

[Ava15]

I think your ring is beautiful and I''m sure the quality of the stone makes it absolutely stunning in real life. How charming your guy went to Tiffany''s, he wanted the BEST for you. Enjoy your ring and upgrade 10 years from now!

 

[hearts-arrows_girl]

Your ring is stunning. I would love a Tiffany ring. I agree that your guy wanted to get you the best, and did! Tiffany''s is overpriced, but heck, it''s Tiffany''s!. I would be proud to have your ring. And like others have mentioned, if you still don''t like the size, when you are more financially well off, you can decide on an upgrade for a future anniversary. It would be a GREAT 1st, 5th, or 10th anniversary present. Sounds like you have a great guy who loves you! I would love to see more close-up photos of your ring!

 

[decodelighted]

To your questions ... yes, I think a girl should be proud to own a Tiffany e-ring. It does have a certain cache about it and it connotes a sense that your FI tried to give you what he thought was "the best". About the ring on your hand: lovely. You''re very lucky to have a small paw! That gorgeous ring looks like at least 1ct proportionally on your hand. I have a 1.5ct asscher & size 10 fingers. BELIEVE ME yours looks larger on you than mine does on me!!

As to being jealous of friends -- or more conscious of your ring as others get engaged. It''s human but you can''t get hung up on comparisons. Everyone has a different story. Who knows -- maybe they went into big debt for it or they''re just rolling in $$ ... or maybe its even a white sapphire or something. It just doesn''t matter.

In order to one day use Tiffany''s trade up policy I believe you''d have to part with your original ring, or at least stone. Maybe you should aim for *another* e-ring or RHR down the road at a big anniversary or something? Size is def. not everything.

 

[lovegem]

Date: 7/24/2008 2:15:25 AM
Author: jstarfireb

(BTW, I just moved to a very nice area in Center City Philadelphia, and I can''t believe how expensive the cost of living is here! I wouldn''t be surprised if we live pretty close to each other.)

That makes the 3 of us. Moving there within a week. The center of center city.

 

[Circe]

I wouldn''t say that a woman should feel proud to own a Tiffany e-ring just because it is a Tiffany e-ring ... but because it''s a ring chosen with love? Because it''s a beautiful ring? Because it''s a very high-quality ring? Definitely! I''m with you on the blue box not particularly mattering, but I think it''s lovely that your husband wanted you to have what he thought of as being the best.

I don''t know the particulars of Tiffany''s trade-in policy, but if I''m remembering correctly, it''s a one-time deal where you do have to trade the original back, and where you have to spend double the price. So, conceivably, if you guys ever felt like adding another 8,000 to your original purchase price to see what 16,000 could buy at Tiffany''s, you would have options ... but it sounds like you''re attached to your original e-ring. (Hopefully, someone who''s more sure of the details will chime in on this - Lisa?)

And, last of all ... I think your ring looks fabulous on your hand. Very elegant, and very blingy! I have no idea what your friend''s ring looks like, but someone out there will always have something bigger or better - it''s just the way of the world. Try not to let it get to you too much ... that way lies madness. Last week, another poster came on with nearly the exact opposite problem: her FI knew that she wanted a big rock, and got her one ... without realizing that color was also very important to her. It''s a careful balancing act, and I very much agree with you that it''s lovely when couples choose their ring(s) together to avoid these kinds of issues, but it sounds like your husband had the best of intentions. Enjoy your ring for right now, and maybe for some special occasion down the line, pick something out together for the perfect match of sentiment and aesthetics ....

 

[LtlFirecracker]

I have to echo what a lot of other women said on here. If I was in your situation I would be happy that my guy put some thought into the quality of the ring. He wanted you to have what the thought was the best. Many guys pick out a ring without putting too much thought about the diamond, or don''t even know what is important (this fourm is not typical of real life). From the perspective of a guy, Tiffany''s is a place where you can walk in and get a well cut, eye clean diamond in a beautiful setting that was made to fit your diamond. There is a huge mark up, but for guys who buy at Tiffany''s, it is worth it. It is also appealing to a guy to buy from a place that has been in business for a long time and is not in any danger of going out of business. Another plus, that it is a hairloom quality piece that can be passed down with pride.

I think your ring looks great on your hand, and I love the profile view of that setting, it is one of my favorites. The upgrade policy at Tiffanys is not great. It is one time and you have to pay twice the amount of your ring. And you would have to part with your original e-ring. .

Anyways, enjoy it, it looks very good on you. Think about the fact that your FI wants to to have nothing but the best. That is a good sign

 

[vespergirl]

I think that your ring is GORGEOUS! And you know that he went to Tiffany''s because he wanted to get you the best. I personally LOVE that bead setting, and I''d love to see more pics!

 

[motownmama]

YES! Ring looks gorgeous - it was really chosen with love and I bet he''s very proud of it - I''ve actually been in Tif''s in NYC when a guy was buying an ER to surprise his GF and he seemed to be beaming (it was about 1/2 CT) - try to picture that. The matching WB sounds great - in the future you might get a matching one for the other side if you like that look and want more bling.

 

[motownmama]

.... lots more pics please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Fly Girl]

You have a beautiful diamond engagement ring there. You never have to look at it and worry if it is eye clean, or if it looks a bit yellow. You have top quality, and over 0.5 ct. That''s a great size. In fact, I prefer that size of diamond ring, because it is so much more wearable than larger diamonds.

Please be happy with that ring. It is gorgeous, and you can wear it just about anywhere.

Best wishes to you both!

 

[bee*]

Your ring is beautiful on your hand! I have a Tiffany ring myself as the lucida was the only ring that D and I loved. I don''t feel proud to wear it as it''s from Tiffanys, moreso the fact that it''s so pretty

 

[diamondfan]

Hi! I live in the Main Line too!

I would not worry too much though I totally get where you are coming from.

I had to tell hubby about what I liked and where to shop but it took time, and I had to be sensitive about things. Enjoy your ring, as there is not much you can do about it now, and be happy he wanted to go and get you something really special.

 

[tberube]

Your stone looks beautiful on your tiny little finger! And as for your other concerns: yes, one might say that you got quality over quantity. Some find that to be the most important thing. Others prefer quantity over quality, and still some others want a mixture of both. I don't think there is anything wrong with any of these opinions, but I do think you should be proud of the fact that your ring will always face up white, will always be crystal clear, and you most likely won't have to deal with setting problems that may occur with jewelry of lesser quality.

I'm not a huge name-brand or Tiffany's fan, but I do believe you get what you pay for. Many Pricescopers believe that Tiffany's is bar none the best quality out there and worth the price. Either way your fiance did an excellent job because he wanted only the very best for his girl and he picked a beauty.

 

[girlie-girl]

I too think the ring is very pretty and doesn't look small at all.

Some people are huge into name brand stuff, so they'd take a Tiffany regardless of the cost just because it's a Tiffany. lol I'm not big on name brands so would probably shy away from Tiffany just because of the pricetag they carry, but heck I certainly wouldn't turn one down if someone wanted to give me one.

I personally am quite color sensitive and am afraid I'm one of those "mind clean" people too

so I may be in the minority here but I'll always take the smaller, higher color/clarity, better cut stone than a larger rock any day of the week.

Have the two of you spoken about this again recently and he's now offering to get you something else or what? I was a bit confused when you said "Not that at the time he offered to get something else if I wanted it..."

I hope the two of you are able to come to a resolution that works for both of you.

Good luck!

 

[cara]

Of course you should be proud of your Tiffany ring. You guy did his best, even though he wasn''t a mind reader and ended up spending the money in a different way that you would have.

The engagement ring thing is hard on guys. There is this romantic expectation of the surprise engagement ring that is perfectly suited to everything the girl would have picked for herself, and it is a load of hooey! I certainly didn''t know what I wanted until I went looking, so how is my guy supposed to guess better than me! Your guy tried. Love him for that, love your ring for that, and concentrate on setting different gifting practices in marriage. Ie. you want more input on gifts of jewelry.

Congrats, it is a lovely ring. And it doesn''t have to be your only ring.

 

[Shoopy]

A "girl" shouldn''t feel lucky to have any particular ring.

A "girl" should feel lucky to have found someone in their life that they love and that loves her back and is now asking her to spend the rest of her life with him.

That''s all I''ll say on that.

 

[surfgirl]

Date: 7/24/2008 12:57:26 PM
Author: fieryred33143
A ''girl'' shouldn''t feel lucky to have any particular ring.

A ''girl'' should feel lucky to have found someone in their life that they love and that loves her back and is now asking her to spend the rest of her life with him.

That''s all I''ll say on that.

fiery, may I Word! your entire post? Thanks..WORD! Except the part about Marc Anthony because, just. no.

 

[lisa1.01fvs1]

Hi u can upgrade anytiime but the policy sucks.

U have to spend twice the original amt.

So, $8K comes to $16K before taxes for example. I guess that would get you close to 1.2ct. or therabouts right now in a RB.

What''s the point of that?

Especially since inflation changes prices dramatically so send it back to Tiff''s for an updated price if you want the same
bang for your buck but remember it will cost more in the end. This goes for insuring it too.

Or stay w/ the orig. purchase price and you will get less for your upgrade unless u do it soon.

The same ring in 10 yrs. will be worth more but also cost more to upgrade.........unless u settle for the orig. amt. and by then the size diminishes dramatically

I say stick w/ the beautiful ring u have and then save for a RHR or upgrade w/ another vendor down the line and give ur orig. e-ring to your daughter or son.

 

[RxTechRN2b]

Your hands are small and the delicate ring is perfectly proportioned for you. I LOVE your ring and LOVE stones under a carat in a delicate non-ornate setting. Your ring is elegant, classy, classic, and understated. Many many girls covet a ring from T&Co and would rather have a smaller ring just for the satisfaction of wearing the name. I have two T&Co celebration rings, and while I know I could have spent less elsewhere, I feel like I have the best (knowing that just as good and possibly better quality can be found through online PS vendors). Your ring is extra special because it carries the T&Co name and your boyfriend went for what he considers top-of-the-line for the girl he loves. You have a ring that''s been featured in full page ads in magazines featuring high-end jewelry, and T&Co is often on the front or back cover. What I''m saying is, yes, there is reason to be happy with your ring, and quite possibly, even probably, those girls with larger, lesser quality rings are jealous of what you have! Yours is exquisite in style, size, and name!! I wouldn''t change a thing about it!

 

[glitterata]

I was just admiring my friend''s Tiffany solitaire last night, a similar size in proportion to her hand as yours is to yours. It''s such an elegant setting! I don''t think I''ve ever seen a prettier solitaire. And Tiffany diamonds are beautiful and sparkly. Could your husband have found something bigger for the money? Sure. But as everyone else has said, he bought what he considered the best possible ring for the woman he loved, and it''s gorgeous. Absolutely, wear it with pride. (Anyway, not everyone holds with the "bigger is better" notion--some would argue that smaller diamonds are classier than big ones.) As a practical matter, I wouldn''t trade up, because you''d have to pay the Tiffany markup again. I would keep it and someday get another, bigger diamond ring, if you still want one and can afford it.

 

[bootsiekin]

Hi everyone,

Thank you so much for your advice and opinions! It was really nice getting input from people who are very interested in their diamonds and rings. You have all helped put my mind at ease about this. I can''t explain why it suddenly started to bother me, and I want to be happy with it, but at the same time I am kicking myself for seeming materialistic. (I swear living on the "main line" is turning me snobby - no offense to the other Philly residents!) From the start I was very impressed by the quality - especially having never owned anything from Tiffany. I suppose what partly started my dilemma was wondering if it wasn''t proportionate to my finger as I was reading people saying they were a ring size 4.5 and thought a 1.1C looked perfect and I thought, oh man mine is tiny then!

Anyway, I appreciate all of your very kind words and for not taking me as a snobby, ungrateful person! Dont worry, I love my fiance and I would have accepted any ring - the real trouble set in when I found out how much money he spent and I thought he got ripped off and could have had something larger with still good quality for less money elsewhere. I wish I wouldnt have found out, but to put it on my renters insurance I had to end up knowing.

I can try to post a few more pictures, though I cant get too close because the focus doesnt work..I have some with the wedding band (which I think I will feel better about the ''bling'' factor when I can be wearing that) Our wedding is Oct. 11.

Thank you again all so much! I feel much better.

 

[Madam Bijoux]

I''m proud of all my rings from T & Co, but I''m more proud of my ability to pick a good stone without looking at its stats or a GIA report first (shameless bragging here).

 

[jcarlylew]

with the wedding band, it looks even better! I know what its like to live in a "snobby" neighboorhood but not having the same income (i work in a wealthy building..but i''m not!).

My ering is from the 20''s, which does not have a ton of bling. my center stone is also .52. but i LOVE how it looks on me. i have smaller hands too, and honestly i thought anything more would look wonkey on me.

Try looking in the mirror from a distance when the ring is super shiney and clean. it blew my mind away when i did!


your ring is fab, and dont let anything let you think otherwise!

 

[diamondringlover]

That set looks perfect on you hand, beautiful

 

[icekid]

Your ring is beautiful!! And it sounds like your man did put some thought and effort into choosing a ring that he thought you would love, and that''s the part that matters the most. Besides, just think- he could have gone to Zales or Ebay and bought you 2 carats for 8 grand. Ah.. no thanks

I am sure your ring has all the sparkle a girl could want