Should I downgrade?

[minidancer]

I just took a look at the ring you're contemplating selling. Gorgeous! I can't see wanting to downgrade from this beauty.

I vote hold on to it, and just wear the WB on days you don't feel like showing your ER off.

 

[Dreamer_D]

I think when you have a very valuable ring that is something you adore, you don't have to necessarily wear it every day to get pleasure from it. Just knowing you own it is enough! Knowing you have the choice to wear it. I know its hard to imagine in the moment how your tastes an style might change over time, but there is one realitive surety in life: You will change! And most likely, as you age, you will gain status socially and also care less about others' petty judgments. Keep your ring until that day comes!

Now, if you were thinking of selling it to get something else you loved more, or to free up some cash... that is one thing. But selling something you love and adore and can afford to keep because you don't wear it 24/7, or because you *currently* work in an environment where you fear the ring could draw negative impressions... well that I can't get behind

For what its worth, I live and work in a city and environment where NO ONE wears large diamond rings. I believe the average e-ring is about .3ct to .5ct. People just don't prioritize or value such things here. But I value it, and I am old enough and high status enough that it doesn't matter anymore

 

[distracts]

I'm really surprised by the amount of people who don't wear their rings everyday! Everyone I know wears their rings everyday no matter what. I've actually had to lecture a few people about damaging jewelry during various activities.

Those are what we call "non-jewelry people."

(Actually for all that I love jewelry more than almost anyone else I know, I wear it a lot less! Most of the ladies in my silversmithing classes are the same way - love jewelry, wear it less than the average person, even though they make & own beautiful pieces. It's a perfectly normal permutation of jewelry love. Loving jewelry and loving wearing jewelry are two different things, that often overlap but that don't always overlap!)

 

[woofmama]

I think when you have a very valuable ring that is something you adore, you don't have to necessarily wear it every day to get pleasure from it. Just knowing you own it is enough! Knowing you have the choice to wear it. I know its hard to imagine in the moment how your tastes an style might change over time, but there is one realitive surety in life: You will change! And most likely, as you age, you will gain status socially and also care less about others' petty judgments. Keep your ring until that day comes!

Now, if you were thinking of selling it to get something else you loved more, or to free up some cash... that is one thing. But selling something you love and adore and can afford to keep because you don't wear it 24/7, or because you *currently* work in an environment where you fear the ring could draw negative impressions... well that I can't get behind

For what its worth, I live and work in a city and environment where NO ONE wears large diamond rings. I believe the average e-ring is about .3ct to .5ct. People just don't prioritize or value such things here. But I value it, and I am old enough and high status enough that it doesn't matter anymore

I agree with Dreamer on this. Keep your gorgeous irreplaceable ring but buy a beautiful band or wear a band you already own to work.
Keep in mind, if you've already worn it to work, those that notice such things already have! The cat's out-of-the-bag

 

[thecat]

I just looked at your ring and I love it. Please don't sell it. It's heirloom quality and gorgeous. Please buy a pre-loved 5 stone instead of downgrading.

 

[Candygrl]

Your ring is absolutely stunning! I would never ever sell that ring. I agree that you should get an alternate ring instead.

 

[texaskj]

Keep it. You never know what your life/job will be like in 5, 10, 15 years.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Of course not that would be against PSer rule #1...

 

[metatrix]

I would keep it...it's gorgeous. You could also go with a coloured gem such as a sapphire for an alternate e-ring to wear to work. One that you can also wear on your right hand when you are wearing your engagement ring on your left. And it could be more economical than an alternate diamond ring.

 

[liaerfbv]

Well I broached this topic with DH last night - he's known for awhile that I have been self conscious about my ring, and he was so funny. "Buy yourself 10 engagement rings, I could care less. Whatever makes you happy. Just know that I'll be giving you those rings for the next 10 Christmases."

Perhaps he doesn't know the can of worms he just opened up!
But seriously, I really appreciate all the input. I think I'm going to start looking for an alternate e-ring and keep my ring for special occasions and when I'm feeling fancy. I'm turning 30 later this year, so maybe a new ring will be my present to myself!

 

[RandG]

Well I broached this topic with DH last night - he's known for awhile that I have been self conscious about my ring, and he was so funny. "Buy yourself 10 engagement rings, I could care less. Whatever makes you happy. Just know that I'll be giving you those rings for the next 10 Christmases."

Perhaps he doesn't know the can of worms he just opened up!
But seriously, I really appreciate all the input. I think I'm going to start looking for an alternate e-ring and keep my ring for special occasions and when I'm feeling fancy. I'm turning 30 later this year, so maybe a new ring will be my present to myself!

I love your stone! I'm glad you are keeping it because it will only gain in value over time. It would also make an excellent center stone to a three-stone ring

Good luck in your search for a new ring-- fun!

 

[Dreamer_D]

What a smart husband you have

I highly recommend a classic five stone with .30ct diamonds. A real staple in the diamond wardrobe IMO, and really classy and mature and blingy!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Thank goodness! Your ring is gorgeous and as long as you love it, just wear it when you feel like it! I totally agree with Dreamer about a 5 stone band. Mine is only one carat or so total weight, but it is JUST right to wear when I am going somewhere I don't want to wear the large solitaire! Of course, multiple e-rings sounds good, too!

 

[marcy]

That is awesome news. You can keep your beautiful ring and find something new. Have fun shopping.

 

[distracts]

I work in a large corporate office and am surrounded by women wearing .5-1.0ct rings, so my ring is enormous by comparison, and is actually larger than most of the rings of the people I work for, which makes me uncomfortable. I wish I didn't care.

I would examine this feeling more before you commit - especially re: the norms at your workplace. A lot of people are recommending a blingy five-stone band, but if your problem is that you don't feel like you fit in with the norms, that may not solve it. I have a CZ five-stone and it gets noticed a lot - idk how other people fare, but especially to the jewelry-ignorant, a blingy five-stone may look nearly as expensive/fancy as your e-ring. I think the safest option would be a .75ish ct diamond in an intricate metal setting with no pave diamonds. I have a .5 ct OEC in a simple solitaire that I wear with a die-struck floral band for that purpose. It's dainty and pretty and satisfies my need for nice jewelry while not looking out of place in settings where jewelry is more average. I would try to get something with small details that won't be noticeable from across the room but which you'll really love looking at.

 

[jillianfl]

Wow your ring is stunning!!! Don't ever downgrade please!! Just wear a cheap band and keep it locked away if you must, but something like that is worth hanging onto, you can give it to your kids/ grandkids someday!!! (I am using that excuse to justify getting another ring I had always wanted for myself You would miss it if you sold it, just saw your hubby says ok to more so lucky you! Glad you will keep even if you don't wear it

 

[Rhea]

I work in a large corporate office and am surrounded by women wearing .5-1.0ct rings, so my ring is enormous by comparison, and is actually larger than most of the rings of the people I work for, which makes me uncomfortable. I wish I didn't care.

I would examine this feeling more before you commit - especially re: the norms at your workplace. A lot of people are recommending a blingy five-stone band, but if your problem is that you don't feel like you fit in with the norms, that may not solve it. I have a CZ five-stone and it gets noticed a lot - idk how other people fare, but especially to the jewelry-ignorant, a blingy five-stone may look nearly as expensive/fancy as your e-ring. I think the safest option would be a .75ish ct diamond in an intricate metal setting with no pave diamonds. I have a .5 ct OEC in a simple solitaire that I wear with a die-struck floral band for that purpose. It's dainty and pretty and satisfies my need for nice jewelry while not looking out of place in settings where jewelry is more average. I would try to get something with small details that won't be noticeable from across the room but which you'll really love looking at.

I agree. I used to own an asscher cut cz 5 stone. It wasn't huge, about 4mm I think, and asschers aren't known for being very flashy stones, but that baby was noticed and commented on more than any other piece of jewellery I've ever owned. I sold it

 

[partgypsy]

If I had your ring such as inherited, I would want to hold onto it (OK maybe I'm greedy!).

Really like others have said it is an exceptional piece.
I can totally understand feeling you may not want to wear it as an every day piece.
I would look towards getting something very different, like an eternity or 5 stone ring that you can wear when you just want a little sparkle. Do NOT call it an alternate engagement ring. Just another ring, you happen to wear when you feel the engagement ring is too much for what you are doing. You do not need to explain anything.

EDIT- I just saw what your husband wrote. He is more understanding (and generous) than most!

 

[lioness]

What about a preloved seven-stone band for work? It would have presence without raising eyebrows. Something like this: http://www.diamondbistro.com/category/201/Bands/listings/38717/WF-105ctw-7-stone-diamond-band.html

And yes, keep your ring!!!