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So sad... what should I do?

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blondebunny

blondebunny

Brilliant_Rock
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Feb 18, 2008
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Okay.. so my FI and I had decided we wanted to get married at the Cathedral of Incarnation, we went today and checked it out and loved it. Then all of a sudden I get a message saying that its during Lent and they don''t do weddings then, after being told it was okay. i had already looked at the catholic church downtown and they will be doing renovations when we want to get married.. Our date is February 20, 2010.. We could move it up a week.. BUT then its the day before Vday... Do you think people would come, or is that rude?? Im soo torn.. I dont know where else we could get married... :-(

We could do Leu Gardens.. BUT then its an extra $75 to rent, plus insurance, plus chair rentals.. granted we would probably get some pretty pictures.. but I love the date we picked.. and i dont want to inconvience people with the 13th of February, and plus then we would *HAVE* to include dates so they could enjoy their weekend together ya know?

Im seriously freaken out..I felt like I was doing so good and getting everything booked and ready to go.. and then this...I know its not that big of a deal.. but FI had really wanted to get married in a church.. and there arent any other catholic churchs close to our reception place...

someone tell me it will be okay.... or advice on what should I do?
 
BlondeBunny,

I would move it up a week. Personally, Valentine''s day consists of DINNER for me, so having a wedding the next day would be really be no big deal. I don''t know anyone that does much more then dinner, present, and maybe flowers. It is definitely NOT rude. I would book it a week before and not have a second thought.
 
I''m with Ally... Valentine''s Day isn''t as big as Christmas or something. Are you having people in from out of town? I could see some not coming if that''s the case... But couldn''t they still do a Valentine celebration by you?
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What a pain! Most Catholic churches will not do a wedding during Lent--solemn time equals no joyous events. I''d move it up a week. I don''t think it would inconvenience people, but I would invite dates for all of your guests (I am into "and guest"-ing everyone, though).
 
I think the new date would be fine - I would totally go to a wedding that week without a second thought!
 
Move it a week. I agree with everyone else that Valentines day is just that... a day. The next day is just a day just like the day after St. Patrick''s Day is just a day.
 
the first thing i thought of was....what more of a romantic setting could you get for v-day than a beautiful wedding! i think its a fine idea to move it. nobody would mind at all!
:)
 
I wouldn''t even think twice about Valentine''s Day when trying to decide whether or not I would attend a wedding. And, I only think you will need to +1 the OOT guests (which I would be inclined to do anyways).
 
I think that is it fine if you move it up a week. It won''t be on V-day and I don''t most people would mind. FYI that weekend is also President''s Day weekend too.
 
Of course I think that they would come! What a romantic time for a wedding celebration!

If this is your dream church and you have the flexibility to change your date at this time ... do it! I think that, given what you have explained, that is the best case scenario.
 
Date: 1/11/2009 8:33:36 PM
Author: DMBFiredancer
the first thing i thought of was....what more of a romantic setting could you get for v-day than a beautiful wedding! i think its a fine idea to move it. nobody would mind at all!
:)
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Ditto to this - would love to share a loved one''s special day near to Valentines day! Or new years eve, or xmas eve for that matter - what a great way to celebrate a holiday!
 
Date: 1/11/2009 8:42:27 PM
Author: JerseyGrl81
I think that is it fine if you move it up a week. It won''t be on V-day and I don''t most people would mind. FYI that weekend is also President''s Day weekend too.
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Ditto. Move it up!!!
 
BB, I''m sorry your plans aren''t going as smoothly as they could! I would definitely move it up a week to the day before Valentine''s Day -- I''m surprised that day is available, as I''d think that would be a very popular time to wed! i have friends getting married on Valentine''s Day this year, and I don''t know of anyone who''s considering not going because of the holiday!

(I''m with Kittybean in terms of guest-ing everyone, both because it''s a romantic day and because personally - for my wedding - I think if everyone has a guest or chance to bring one, they''ll dance more and have more fun!)
 
Thanks for the replies... Me and FI were freaking out (okay maybe me a little more..lol..i was throwing a temper tantrum..which i never do... just sad because I was doing soo good!)

Okay.. I think we are going to do the 13th.. I would love Leu Gardens.. but they have SO many restrictions.. no this and that.. blah blah blah...church is VERY lenient and would cause me extra stress! :-)

I think I am going to find hotel rooms NOW and try to block some off and get my Save the Dates out ASAP so everyone can make plans accordingly and since its Presidents Day that following Monday (thanks JerseryGirl) they could have a whole nice weekend! :-) Do you think people would be cool with that?? We get really good discount tickets to Disney too...
thanks
 
Yes, move it up a week. A lot of people boycott Valentine''s Day because all prices for flowers and dinner automatically go up on this one day. They celebrate on some other day. Next year they can celebrate their love on your wedding day!
 
Bummer! My parents'' anni is the 13th though, and it works for them.
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Plus you can do combo V-day and anni dinners. It''s a very romantic date! I would say dates for OOT guests, but I would anyway.

Stress free church all the way!
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Date: 1/11/2009 9:10:39 PM
Author: blondebunny
Thanks for the replies... Me and FI were freaking out (okay maybe me a little more..lol..i was throwing a temper tantrum..which i never do... just sad because I was doing soo good!)

Okay.. I think we are going to do the 13th.. I would love Leu Gardens.. but they have SO many restrictions.. no this and that.. blah blah blah...church is VERY lenient and would cause me extra stress! :-)

I think I am going to find hotel rooms NOW and try to block some off and get my Save the Dates out ASAP so everyone can make plans accordingly and since its Presidents Day that following Monday (thanks JerseryGirl) they could have a whole nice weekend! :-) Do you think people would be cool with that?? We get really good discount tickets to Disney too...
thanks
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I forgot that you are in FL- I think everyone would love to plan a nice long weekend in FL with your wedding as the highlight!
 
That sounds great, BB! The discount tickets to Disney would be an amazing bonus--can I come
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? I think it will be great fun for your guests.
 
That date wouldn''t bother me at all. In fact, it would be nice to have something grand to do the day before Valentine''s Day.

Besides, renting chairs can be very expensive, so if you had to rent chairs that might dent the budget.

Sorry you ran into this snag, BB.
 
As a guest, the date wouldn't bother me at all. I say move it up a week.

As a bride, one thing I would be interested in learning is whether your cost of flowers would be higher for this day (because of Valentine's). It may impact your budget; it may not... but I'd look into it.
 
oh im so sorry blondebunny
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i dont know what you should do but hugs and dust that it all works out...
 
I think it would be kind of romantic to attend a wedding... a joyous celebration of love... the day before Valentine''s day. Someone up above mentioned that flower prices might be higher so make sure you check into that. However, I heard the same thing about flower prices around Mother''s day but personally don''t feel like I experienced that price hike for my own wedding so it may just depend on the florist.
 
As far as the flower prices, I think as long as you''re not doing all red roses, you should be ok =)
 
I would move it up a week, personally. I don''t know many people who really do anything for V Day other than maybe go out to dinner (which you don''t absolutely have to do on 2/14), so I think your guests will be ok with going to a wedding. If you send out save the dates early enough people can work any V Day plans around the wedding.
 
Blondebunny,

Everyone''s suggesting to move it up, but just something to think about: Flowers are going to be EXPENSIVE!!!! I think you''ll need to prepare yourself for how much that will cost. Maybe ask Gypsy or some florists how much they''ll quote you for flowers. Or think about going the DIY route. Or go for a less flowers more candles kind of centerpiece.

~Lisa
 
I honestly don't think anyone would be put out by you hosting a wedding the day before Valentines day. People throw weddings on holidays all the time...New Years Eve, Halloween, Christmas, 4th of July. Valentines Day is so romantic, a wedding seems like it would put people into a very romantic mind frame.

Flowers probably will be pricey...but if you can avoid red roses, you might not feel the pinch as heavily as if you were going all red roses. But, me with my Champange tastes would be like "red roses! red roses!"...anyway.... most people feel V-day is pretty commerical, I don't know anyone who views V-day with the same regard as Christmas, or another major holiday...I won't worry to much about it....
 
I honestly don''t think that V-day is a big thing for most people.

DH and I held our engagement party on V-day itself and loads of people came - some before/after going out for dinner, others who were single and glad to have something to do that night, and some of our friends spent the whole evening with us.

The only thing you may need to be prepared for is a number of people showing up with new bling, as long as you don''t have a problem with that, then go for it.
 
If it makes you feel any better about this situation, a TV station in my homestate runs a contest every year where a local couple wins a $50K wedding to be held on Valentine''s Day, no matter what day of the week it is. I actually know the couple who won last year. I really don''t think that your guests would mind at all! I know I wouldn''t.
 
I know that everyone is different, but Valentine's day has always been NO big deal to me. We exchange cards (sometimes), have a dinner maybe... but this year we're watching our friend's kids so they can have an evening out
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lol. We just don't care about it.

I would actually enjoy going to a wedding as sort of the celebration of Valentine's Day! What a romantic day out
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I say go for it.


ETA: Another upside, your husband-to-be will have a better chance of remember Valentine's Day and your anniversary since they're only a day apart
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I don't know........(no offense to anyone) but that stinks to move YOUR date up because they won't let you have a wedding on that day. I mean, I understand it's Lent and all. But still.....
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Have you thought about any chapels that aren't 'catholic churches' ?

What is more important to you...getting married on Feb. 20, or getting married in a church? That will be the deciding point.

I like the gardens idea you are speaking of.
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That sounds beautiful to me!
 
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