Sooner or Later: What would you do?

[Scooba]

Ok so I have been waiting on my ring for about 2 months since the time we started looking at diamonds. I picked out the rock and we had the setting custom made, well the ring has been hiding in the house for a little over a week now I think. I thought last Sunday was going to be "the day" and it wasn''t, I told my boyfriend that I had kind of had my hopes up and could he hurry up, he said he was trying to plan something great and one of his ideas (which he told me and it was super cute and full of effort) already fell through, I said I understood but that I was very anxious and we need to get plannning on our engagement parties which have to happen the last week in June and the first week in July.

Then today I thought it was going to be "the day" because he some he had some places he had to go this afternoon, he is never vague, I figured this was about the porposal and didn''t ask. When he got back from his "places" he said he had a question and he hated to even ask me but would I rather have my ring very soon or wait until he can plan something very cool in a week or two. He said he was not procrastinating but that things keep getting brought to his attention or something and it would take him a little bit until his plan or whatever can take place.

So what would you do? Would you want the ring right now (take into account I have already been waiting everyday for several weeks) or would you wait for the really cool proposal?

 

[Mandarine]

I would wait!!!!!!!!!

At the end of the day you''ll forget all about the painful wait....but you will remember a memorable proposal!!!!!!!!!

M~

 

[sk8rjen]

Once we''ve had to wait for the ring to get made/ordered/saved for etc...it shouldn''t be too bad a wait after it''s in his possession (unless of course, you''re the one unfortunate person staring at it on a shelf for 11 weeks) Wait for the memorable proposal --- a story *he''ll* want to tell your friends

jen

 

[Mandarine]

1 vote for "Now!"....Diamonds did you do that one yourself??

hehehe just kidding

 

[ephemery1]

I voted for NOW! But only because we had a conversation the other day where he asked me if I would really want to know exactly when and where it was going to happen... and I said no. But I did tell him that after years of wondering and waiting and defending myself to all the people constantly asking "why aren''t you engaged yet??", if the choice were between waiting 6 months for the perfect proposal, and him pulling a ring out of his coat pocket tomorrow morning... I would go with the coat pocket, no question!!

 

[Scooba]

I thought about voting for now myself Mandarine!!!

Ephemery, omg, if it was going to be 6 months I would get it of his pocket!!!! He said a week or 2 and my mom is visiting us for mother''s day so hopefully before then and then next weekend we are going to visit my dad and he already told me it would be before then so I am hoping he means a week or 2!

I guess I could be patient so I have a story to tell my grandkids, his first plan was to have me pulled over and handcuffed and when I turned around he would be on his knee but I guess the police chief didn''t think assigning a cop to wait for my car all night was a very good idea, especially since I am unpredictable and have a common car.

 

[Mandarine]

hahahaha his first plan sounded like an episode of "Punked!"
hahahahaha

 

[Scooba]

That''s exactly what it reminded me of!!! I wondering if I would be waiting just to get punked!

 

[Mandarine]

hahaha...who knows...boys sometimes have a little funny way of thinking about romance!

 

[moon river]

Grant me patience...NOW!!!!

 

[Rhapsody]

I'm the one whos been staring at my ring on the shelf for 12 weeks this friday. The wait while the ring was being made wasn't nearly as annoying as the time waiting since we've picked the ring up has been.

BF has 3 weeks, our anniversary is may 16 and he turns into a pumpkin if whatever he's working on is not done by then. We picked up the ring Feb 3, so that makes about 15 weeks from the time we picked it up until he proposes (I think it'll take him right up until his own self-imposed deadline).

Although the wait is hard I would rather have him do something special and have him plan something fun for me than just have had him propose in the parking lot the night we picked the ring up. The other night he told me he thought maybe he should have done it right away since his project was taking so much longer than he planned (he said he had expected it to only take a week or two, not 15), but I am SOO excited to see what it is he's making me. I think it will be worth the wait to have a really memorable proposal.

 

[froufrou]

ooh...i dont know. in the case of 1-2 weeks you shoudl definately wait, everyone above is right. unless he is just saying that and then he plans it to be 1-2 weeks after that and 1-2 weeks after THAT...

 

[snuga]

WAIT!! Only 1-2 weeks?? Please, you can totally do that. You say you have been waiting for a few months. Some ladies on here have been waiting for a few years.

Take some time out for yourself, get a massage, take a walk, get your mind of the engagement and proposal, those 2 weeks will fly by, you will have a great proposal, a great memory, and you will most likely be glad you waited! If you get it now, you will have your ring, but not as memorable a proposal as if you wait..

Just my 0.02

 

[dani13]

Just wait. The ring is so not the most important thing. What is important is that moment when your sweetie asks you to be his wife- it is the most awesome moment ever. I would not have traded my proposal for the world. Not to say I wasnt anxious for the ring, I was, but I just gave him time to plan what he wanted to plan, and it was totally worth it.

 

[ephemery1]

Hmmm... good advice from everyone. So fine, I admit... mostly I just want Diamonds to get engaged so I can live vicariously through her and finally see handshots of that rock!!!

 

[Mandarine]

Diamonds looks like by popular demand we are saying you should wait and be "punked"!!!!!

1-2 weeks...you can wait that long....hey, even we are dying to see the handshots, but we will demonstrate that we too can be patient!

 

[Mannequin]

Hang in there, Diamonds! 1-2 weeks will fly by sooner than you know it.

Hopefully we will be posting handshots together soon, my guy is "girl soon".

 

[sk8rjen]

Rhapsody -- dang, where did the other week go?? It sounds like what he''s working on will be totally worth your wait, but (sorry) I still think it''s mean he keeps it on your shelf in plain sight!

I think I''d have permanently eliminated my BF''s ability to have children by now if that were *me* -- But I really cannot WAIT to hear about your incredible proposal!

Diamonds -- 1 to 2 weeks isn''t bad at all -- just take it day at a time (you never know, it could be sooner, right?) I can''t wait to hear your story, either!

Either way, sounds like the next few weeks have some positives in store for LIWS!

jen

 

[diamondfan]

Not to minimize how it might drab to you, but 1-2 weeks is not too bad and you will be glad in the long run that you waited...he seems so enthused about doing it in a special manner, and you know it is coming soon...so count to 10, take a jog, clean out your fridge...but try not to obsess if you can avoid it! (easier said than done!)

 

[Scooba]

Ok, ok, I guess you guys are right, you are all so wise! But it better be worth it!!

Diamondfan- much easier said than done since I am obsessed with PS!

 

[Mara]

wait and be patient..

i was totally anxious to get my ring...so anxious that he drove over to get it on a weekday as soon as it was done (about a 2 hour drive from his work both ways) and then we went out to dinner that night. i knew it was happening but i was dying for my ring. of course it's great once the proposal is done and you have it BUT then he was like oh i was thinking of taking you away to bernardus for the weekend (this awesome resort in carmel that we love) and doing it there BUT you were dying for it so i didn't want to make you wait..and i was like DAMN if i could have only waited 2 more days..i'd have some totally romantic proposal story amidst the mountains with violins in the background or something equally movie-worthy.

oh well...i think if i had to do it again (of course now i can say this) i'd wait the few extra days if it meant some really awesome story, but in the end it's not about the proposal or the ring, it's about the marriage. so either way ... as long as you get to that part.

but i say be patient! let the boy plan.

 

[diamondfan]

Date: 4/27/2006 12:48:21 AM
Author: Diamonds are Hot!
Ok, ok, I guess you guys are right, you are all so wise! But it better be worth it!!

Diamondfan- much easier said than done since I am obsessed with PS!

Aren''t we all?!

 

[ladykemma]

I''m not big on these fancy proposals - too much TV-- too much fantasy - not the reality of life.

we picked out the ring togther, he went and picked it up when it was ready and gave it to me in the parking lot. coat pocket absolutely!

 

[ephemery1]

Ladykemma I hear you... I''m really awful about "romantic" moments... no matter what the occasion, I always start laughing. I have this horrible vision of my BF planning something special and wonderful and me cracking a totally inappropriate sarcastic comment right as he gets down on one knee. Not to mention I only cry at inappropriate moments too... TV commercials and such... so all the times I SHOULD be crying genuine, emotional tears, I never actually do. My poor BF... I have faith in him, but he REALLY better not have his heart set on candlelight and carriage rides and gazing into each others eyes and stuff.

 

[AmberWaves]

I voted for "Wait" because the same thing happened to me. The ring was at FedEx in MY name

, so we picked it up together, and he let me see it and wear it for an hour. But then he saw how happy I was, and asked me if I wanted to get it then, or if I wanted to wait a week and a half until we went to Disneyland. I honestly wavered, but then told him I''d wait. Of course, the 10 hours he made me wait at Disneyland SUCKED. But I knew it was there, and I knew it was coming (and I knew it was in a zippered pocket

), but I was still surprised when he busted it out. It made me happy we had a great story to tell, because the first thing anyone said other than "Where''s the ring, lemme see it!" was, "How''d he do it?" I think that the proposal was something for HIM, not so much me. You know?

 

[Scooba]

Mara-what a great example, what a good lesson, thanks!

ephemery- I cry at TV commericals too!!! The K9 Advantix flea stuff with that little puppy makes me cry, he''s just so cute, anything with babies or little animals, my boyfriend NEVER takes my crying seriously now because of that.

Amber- your story is cute! I didn''t think so many people would ask how he did it but I guess you''re right.

Thank all you guys so much, you are all so sweet when I guess I am being awfully silly.

 

[AmberWaves]

Diamonds, you are NOT being silly. It''s totally hard, weighing the issue of wanting it so badly, but also wanting it perfect.

I also think that since he''s putting so much thought into the proposal, it would make him SO happy to get to do it big, like he wanted to!! Yay! It''s soon, though!!

 

[bobacha]

Hang in there .. 2 even 3 weeks will go by before you know it I''m sure it will be worth the wait...

 

[bobacha]

Date: 4/27/2006 5:47:58 AM
Author: ladykemma
I''m not big on these fancy proposals - too much TV-- too much fantasy - not the reality of life.

we picked out the ring togther, he went and picked it up when it was ready and gave it to me in the parking lot. coat pocket absolutely!

Oh.. glad to hear I''m not the only one in this situation..
well my bf don''t even have a ring yet.. but when he does.. i''m sure he will ask for my opinion before he make the purchase.. and afterwards he probably will just give it to me to wear right away..

although deep down inside, I wish for a sweet proposal.. not sure if it''s gonna happen.. anyways for me & him, the real proposal will be done by our parents..

 

[Julian]

First of all, CONGRATULATIONS! Your ring is SPECTACULAR!!!!!!!

That having been said...

I say wait because as soon as you're engaged EVERYONE will ask you how he proposed. (They all love to live through newly engaged gals!) Part of the fun is telling them how he asked you to be his forever.

And even years later, when you're asked about it or if it comes up in conversations -- you will have that dreamy look and fall in love all over again. Don't cheat yourself out of that! I know you want the ring now. We all feel your pain!

But you should really LET your guy knock your socks off. Don't cheat him out of doing something really amazing for you. The anticipation will be soooo worth it. And you will have that memory forever. Mine was hands down one of the top 3 most special, beautiful days of my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Congrats again!