Soooo annoyed (small rant coming up!)

[chizzy1982]

Ok so here''s my problem.

Recently my BF has been going out more than usual during the week due to work - I don''t mind this at all. i merely ask him roughly what time he is going to be home so i can sort out supper and things. I also ask that if he is going to be late (after 11pm) that he doesn''t wake me up. I should add that these buisness meetings are held down the pub so by the time he rocks up at home he has has a few.

Now what is really irking me at the mo is he DOES wake me up, noramlly coz he is slighly worse for wear, AND when I have specifically asked him not to phone me he does..........repeatdly. I phone him when I''m off to bed to let him know I''m going to bed and not to phone me, but he still does - he even made me speak to his boss at 1am so I could say hello!!!!!

i was beyond annoyed. Anyway he says he only phones me out of love for me and that when he''s had a few he wants to get everyone to speak to me!

Anyway, tonight has really got me very irritated. I''m really kanckered - I''ve not slept well all week, he knows this. It is one of his freinds 30th drinks tonight and I did not go as I am so tired I need an early night. I spoke to him and said I was knackered, he says he was too and that he was only going for one and he would be home really early. Ok so its know gone 11pm - he''s just phoned to say he''s finishing up and coming home - it''s going to take over an hour for him to get home, which means he''ll be in by about half midnight, slightly tipsy

Am I being a really stroppy moo? Everytime he does this i speak to him about it and he apologises, but it keeps happening.
Have i totally over reacted and am making a moutain out of a mole hill??

Sorry for the rant

 

[Lanie]

I don''t know what to tell you...I couldn''t focus on your rant because of your cute dialect.

In all seriousness, why can''t you just not answer the phone? A couple of times of not answering, and he should get the hint. I''m assuming he doesn''t have to wake up as early as you do. There could be worse problems though...he could be going out and not calling at all.

 

[chizzy1982]

Yep thought about not answering the phone.......but if I don''t pick up or have it on silent (which I hate doing as my mobile is my alarm clock and I''m so paranoid it won''t go off if its on silent - go figure!) then he will ring the house phone. Also I also worry if I don''t pick up it will be the one time he is in a spot of bother.......weird huh?

But excellent point though - at least he does phone me!!! never thought of it that way!!

 

[Smurfysmiles]

I sometimes have this problem too. My SO is the manager of a nightclub and when they get done early he tends to stay and have a few drinks which is fine with me. I only have to get up early one day a week so that is not a problem. I also use my phone as my alarm clock so I know how you feel. My SO texts me and it is usually just to give me a general idea when he''ll be home. I like that he texts instead of calling because I can set the text alert to silent and still keep my phone alert on loud. If I''m awake I''ll write back, if not I''ll get it the next day. Also, my SO sleeps on the couch if I am asleep and he gets home late. don''t get the wrong idea, I''ve never told him he had to do this. He just does it on his own out of courtesy. Although I have to admit I hate waking up by myself in the bed once in a while but I guess it is ok.

Hope you get this figured out soon so you can get some sleep!

 

[monarch64]

Hmmm...could any of these "business meetings" have to do with him going ring-shopping???? I wonder, because he is making a huge point to call you while he is out late...perhaps he is trying to throw you off but still trying to make sure you know he isn''t doing anything wrong?

 

[swingirl]

So he''s driving home tipsy? Yikes!!

 

[bee*]

D does the exact same! I was woken up at 2am last night from him to tell me all the night''s gossip from the pub. To be honest, I kind of find it funny and I like knowing that he''s home safe so I''m glad that he does it most of the time. Not sure if there''s anything to do bar putting your phone on silent as he doesn''t seem to listen when you say not to do it.

 

[monarch64]

Date: 4/5/2008 3:17:00 AM
Author: swingirl
So he''s driving home tipsy? Yikes!!

good point, swingirl...hopefully he''s taking cabs? (but it sounds like he''s not...

)

 

[Deelight]

Date: 4/5/2008 3:17:00 AM
Author: swingirl
So he''s driving home tipsy? Yikes!!

That is a really bad thing drinking and driving do not mix, I also hope he is cabbing it.

I would take your home phone of the hook and just to make certain set a dummy alarm to see if your phone will let the alarm go off if the phone is set to silent if it does pop it on silent and then no more annoying phone calls when you are trying to sleep. He will get the message when you don''t answer.

No I don''t think your making a mountain out of a mole hill that would seriously pee me off, sit him down on and tell him flat strapped it is not acceptable to me apologising is useless unless the person is willing to actually fix the behavior.

 

[brooke.lynne]

I think perhaps these habits of his could be a really good thing -- if you shift your perspective a bit.

Rather than be annoyed, realize how sweet it is that he can''t even go a whole evening without wanting to talk to you, and he can''t even go to bed without sharing his evening with you! There are women whose SOs refuse to call from the pub, or sneak in and try not to wake them so they have no idea how late he actually came home!

It''s especially endearing when you realize that with a little buzz, the social habits and self-conciousness are gone, and he just has that primal sense to reach for you. Aww.

 

[chocolatefudge]

On the bright side Chizzy, at least he''s thinking of you But I understand why his behaviour would annoy you. Don''t really know what to tell you, I know you''ve spoken to him but maybe you need to REALLY talk to him. Good luck!

 

[chizzy1982]

I must say I felt so much better after having rant.

Firslty I must clarify he does absolutley NOT drive home after he has had a drink - I don''t know where the idea came from. We live in London
and he has no choice but to use public transport which is why it takes so long.

We had another talk about it this morning and I''m putting my phone on silent and we are going get an alarm clock - everyone is a winner!!

Really glad that other people''s SO do the same thing!!

And i guess when i do think about it is really sweet that he does think of me when he is out.

Thank you ladies for listening to me moan - very much appreciated

 

[swingirl]

Sorry to have assumed he was driving. In the US there aren''t many places you''d be taking public transportation at midnight.

 

[chizzy1982]

No problem swingirl - I should have clarified we were in London, given this is a US site!

 

[Deelight]

Date: 4/5/2008 5:50:17 PM
Author: swingirl
Sorry to have assumed he was driving. In the US there aren''t many places you''d be taking public transportation at midnight.

Not here in Australia either, the public transport is seriously lacking misunderstanding sorry

 

[chizzy1982]

No worries Deelight!!

 

[lliang_chi]

Hope you''ll be able to sleep through the night Chizzy. Glad you guys were able to compromise. It is sweet that he calls you, but I can totally see where you''ll find it annoying, really quickly.