sticker shock!?

[aliciagirl]

I am one of those doesn''t-want-to-be-engaged-for-seventeen-years-before-I''m-married girls, so I am not yet engaged. We have, however, been talking about how much money we are going to need to save for our wedding to happen in 2010. We are originally from rural West Virginia and plan to get married there and figured that really, we could probably get everything we ever wanted there for less than $30,000. Where we are from in WV is very strange because it is almost unheard of to not get married in a church and most receptions at home are in the church reception hall. This isn''t what BF and I want so we''ve been looking for something else. There are no social halls or ballrooms or BIG buidlings anywhere close to where we live.

We picked a resort that''s about an hour and a half drive (on back roads! ugh, i''ve been spoiled with interstates) and they''ve given us information about their site. Turns out, it''s $200 a person JUST for food and drinks (It''s a great package with a great menu and an open bar). I''ve watched wedding shows, I know this isn''t completely unheard of but it way more than I was expecting to pay. BF is like "Why are we paying $200 per person for one entree? What if they don''t like filet mignon? They probably can''t even SAY filet mignon!!!" Whhhhhyyy does it cost so much? It''s a beautiful site but still, it''s in BACK ROADS WV! We don''t have any other options, unless, ya know, we''re okay with having a BBQ reception in Billy''s backyard or a huge armory they use to train National Reservists. We''re really just glad we know so early we need to up the budget, but we''re also kind of disappointed that it''s ridiculously extravagant or a church buffet. There''s no middle ground.

I guess the point of this post (other than to rant!) was to see if anyone has had a similar experience? And to say that it''s best to know what exactly you are wanting in your area YEARS in advance, apparently, if you want to be able to afford it (debt-free, of course)

 

[FacetFire]

I know that you thought getting married in WV would save you money, but since it seems that it is actually as expensive as anywhere else, have you given thought to getting married in another state? Perhaps where you live now, or someplace that means something to you as a couple (favorite vacation spot, place you went to school, etc.)?

I have to say that the prices you are talking are expensive even for a big city. FI and I looked at a spot in DC but passed because it would have cost us $200 or $250 a head for dinner, which seemed crazy. I couldn''t even imagine food tasting that good!

 

[aliciagirl]

Date: 11/16/2007 12:29:15 PM
Author: FacetFire
I know that you thought getting married in WV would save you money, but since it seems that it is actually as expensive as anywhere else, have you given thought to getting married in another state? Perhaps where you live now, or someplace that means something to you as a couple (favorite vacation spot, place you went to school, etc.)?


I have to say that the prices you are talking are expensive even for a big city. FI and I looked at a spot in DC but passed because it would have cost us $200 or $250 a head for dinner, which seemed crazy. I couldn''t even imagine food tasting that good!

We would both love more than anything to do that but our families wouldn''t. His mom has never traveled out of the state and will get nervous to drive even the hour and a half to this site. My mom is in a group home type facility, so it would be impossible to transport her three states away, as well. There are great places even 3 hours away that would be wonderful that we aren''t really considering because what''s most important is all the people we love being there. It kind of makes it an unfortunate situation (especially for our wallets!)

 

[ladyciel]

Is there a possibility you could find somewhere to have a tent wedding? Any farms or parks where you could pay to have a tent set up (with floor and walls so it''s rain-proof) for the reception, with the ceremony outside?

Also, I have no idea where in WV you are, but some friends of ours got married this past summer with their reception in Wheeling. It''s right on the border of Ohio, west of Pittsburgh. They had it at the Wheeling Country Club, right by the huge Oglebay park, and she said they got their buffet at 19.99pp (not including bar). It was a nice place (much nicer than that price tag suggests), trust me. Chances are it''s nowhere near you, but at least it''s in state...?

 

[Pandora II]

My sister and all my cousins have all had marquee weddings - I haven''t because I didn''t want a chuch wedding and my mother didn''t want to kick the garden into shape this year! It is considered very chic in the UK (mainly for snob value I think as it shows you have enough land to put a marquee on

, my family just do it for the extra control over the day and to save some $$)

It looks so pretty in photos - you can get them in loads of different option, with laid dancefloors etc.

They''re still quite $$, plus you have to hire chairs etc, but you can bring in your own caterers and your own drink so you save loads there. You can also do gorgeous things with garlands of flowers to decorate them. All you need is a scenic area to plonk your tent in!

 

[cara]

As for the $200 pp place, does this place have a separate site fee? And what size wedding are you planning on having? Are there any extras included, such as flowers, entertainment, day-of coordinator? And I seriously hope that rentals, tax and tip are included in that quote.

That is a lot of money, I have to say. But I think that is about what my wedding ended up costing for the site fee, catering, and drink components of a 100 person wedding in N. CA wine country, presumably a much more expensive market.

I would really consider a tent wedding somewhere. There can be a lot of add-on costs, but unless you really love the venue you got the quote from, you could have a lot more control over the elements if you put it together yourself. Though if you are not currently based in WV you might have to rely either on family or a professional coordinator.

 

[LAJennifer]

Where in WV are you considering? I''m sure there are a ton of places within reasonable driving distance. In Charleston, there is an Embassy Suites and also a Marriott - also the University of Charleston has a beautiful rotunda that probably wouldn''t cost much money. In Braxton county (right smack in the middle of the state) is a very nice Days Inn that has a lot of meeting space - my cousin used to work in catering at this property. Unless you are shooting for the Greenbrier, I really think you have a lot of options - just let us know where you are looking.

 

[aliciagirl]

LAJennifer: I'm from Richwood and he is from Craigsville. Charleston is a bit too long of a drive, not for us, but for our families and friends. Neither of our families have a lot of extra money, so we're hoping to stay somewhere that they can attend but drive back home the night of. We were looking at The Resort in Glade Springs. But at these prices, we might as well throw The Greenbrier in there, too. Haha. We really love the Lewisburg area but we are living in Erie now and will be moving who knows where at the end of this year, so taking it on myself isn't something I would want to do. And well, it's Richwood, WV so I'm not convinced there will be any great planners in the area.

We're thinking anywhere an hour to an hour and a half away would be acceptable. And any direction except towards Marlinton (altough Snowshoe, no doubt, has some beautiful spaces) because that is just... a very very scary drive.

Cara and everyone else who suggested a tent: That's not a bad idea, I just feel like it's a little more outdoorsy than either of us want. WV is a v.v. beautiful state, don't get me wrong. But I don't like the idea of just throwing a tent up in a field somewhere. It's what we did in high school to have parties - haha. And it just doesn't bring back classy memories.

 

[Independent Gal]

Another option is just to invite fewer people and save on other items: buy a sample or once-worn gown, DIY your invitations, and keep your guest list to 120 and you''re golden for 30K.

 

[peridot83]

Is it just a formal atmosphere that you want...or is it a formal, profesisonal picture perfect wedding (i.e. including food, flowers, lighting, decor). Just because depending on the ruralness of where you are from, the resort might not only provide a great location but your best access and price to the top vendors in West Virginia.

I''m not from West Virginia, so I have no idea but here''s something you may need to ask...would you be able to get the types of vendors you want to come out to a location by your or his hometown?

The resort may charge so much becuase it is an isolated location, and therefore bringing in the varieties of flowers, food, linens etc. that you would want may costs a lot more. There may be less vendors, and less competition/demand to help keep prices down.

I wonder even if you did choose to put up a tent (which by the way in CA at least is considered a very classy option..but I can understand the cringeworthiness if it reminds you of high school parties!!), if you would be charged THROUGH THE ROOF in order to get all the vendors to come to where the wedding was at? And to get the kind of flowers, cakes etc. that you would want.

However, if you''re not so picky about the other stuff (cake, food, flowers) or know you can get the vendors for cheaper than the resort is offering, I woud drop ''em immediately!