Tacky question

[amc80]

Ha-ha tell me about it "You use a baby Bjorn to carry your c section baby after formula feeding?!? You monster!!!!... You're probably working, too arent you "

Annnd, that's me in a nutshell. Not just a CS, but an elective one at that. The horror.

 

[Trekkie]

Sooooooooooo. I've been following this thread with great interest but haven't wanted to reply from my phone because I have so much to say.

Health =/= wealth, not unless you have medical bills up the whazoo. Yes, it's important to us all, but you know what, I don't have the greatest health either but I am able to distinguish between health and wealth and able to see the distinct value in each.

It definitely is relative. Definitely.

I have a four bedroom house in a good area in my town, within an easy walk to three of the most expensive private schools in the country. My son will be going to one of them - an "Elite Seven" school so good people send their children there from all over the world. We have a nanny and a full time maid. I have a weekly hair appointment and a monthly pedi and wax appointment. We go on overseas trips every couple of years and we go on local trips several times a year. Sometimes we book into nice hotels an hour away just because we need a break but can't go very far (yeah, a luxury, but oh well). Sometimes we chuck the camping gear in the back of the car, drive into the wilderness for the weekend and have a wonderful escape and have spent less than $50. I drive a mid-range 2011 car with 60 000 miles on the clock and more than one dent. My DH drives the same 1994 VW he had as a student. It currently has around 140 000 miles on it and we're in absolutely no hurry to replace it. No debt other than our mortgage. I don't have a 2ct ring - I have a .51 G VS2 H&A and I adore it.

Am I wealthy? My maid would say yes, undoubtedly. I have a car. I have an iPhone, an iPad *and* a laptop. I have a fixed telephone line. High speed internet at home. I buy shoes because they're pretty, not because my current pair needs to be replaced. According to those calculators, I'm dirt poor, lol. However, I'm in South Africa, and in my country I am definitely in a privileged position. Far, far, faaaaaaar from wealthy, but definitely privileged.

On the other side of the spectrum is poverty. Just as people are reluctant to classify themselves as wealthy, I don't know a single poor person who thinks of themselves as poor. There is always someone worse off. For instance, my colleague who earns around US$300 a month, collects glass bottles at work to give to her cousin so that she can sell them for cash. The cousin, whose only income is this income from bottle selling, doesn't think of herself as poor and uses some of her bottle selling income to buy bread for "the poor". Through the Aids centre I volunteer at, I know several child headed households. One which stands out is a 16 year old girl who is caring for her 13 and 8 year old siblings and does so with an income of $60 per month, a $10 food parcel a month and some help with school stationery and school uniforms. Believe it or not, she doesn't think they're poor either! She feels she's fortunate because she lives in a brick house and she and her siblings go to school. To her, poverty is living in a tin shack and not being able to go to school.

Humbling, and it goes to show how relative it all is.

 

[kenny]

Thanks for your post, Trekkie.

 

[mochiko42]

According to the calculator, my husband and I are middle class (we live outside of the US though, where we live I think we would be considered middle upper class). However, in our social circle, we are the "less well off". So it's all relative! "Wealthy" is a subjective term. There is always going to be someone richer, and poorer, than yourself.

To me, "wealthy" means the following:

- Income > Expenditure
- No debt besides mortgage
- Regular, steady source of income
- Average income above the median amount for your city/area
- Sufficient savings to maintain your lifestyle for at least 12 months and preferably up to 3 years (in case of emergencies) IN ADDITION TO pension plan such as 401k
- Being able to pay off all your bills in full (including credit card bills) on time
- Being able to sleep at night without worrying about how to pay your bills (i.e. not living paycheck to paycheck)

While the OP's question was solely about monetary wealth, I think health is a relevant factor at play here since it is one of the more expensive yet unpredictable/unexpected factors that we cannot control.

 

[arkieb1]

Thanks for your post, Trekkie.

+1

 

[Jambalaya]

And here I was thinking rich bitches that walk their kids on leashes won the prize for the most controversial.........
Jambalaya now your secret is out everyone wants you for their wingwoman

I hunt alone, dahling! What kind of sugar daddy would I land with all the gorgeous women of Pricescope in tow, I ask you?

 

[Jambalaya]

And then there's mental, or emotional riches. If I had a very high-paying, prestigious job but still had to answer to the boss (and I would have to, because what job doesn't have a boss) then I wouldn't consider myself wealthy because I wouldn't be free. Free to do what I want, when I want, and to be myself at all times. That is real riches, to me. What price freedom? In some ways, to me, a struggling artist who is getting by but has all that personal freedom is richer than someone who is highly-paid but in golden handcuffs.

And then there's my marry-divorce, rinse-and-repeat formula, a perennial winner!

 

[arkieb1]

And here I was thinking rich bitches that walk their kids on leashes won the prize for the most controversial.........
Jambalaya now your secret is out everyone wants you for their wingwoman

I hunt alone, dahling! What kind of sugar daddy would I land with all the gorgeous women of Pricescope in tow, I ask you?

You can have the sugar daddies, Kenny and I call dibs on the buff ones....

 

[Jambalaya]

And here I was thinking rich bitches that walk their kids on leashes won the prize for the most controversial.........
Jambalaya now your secret is out everyone wants you for their wingwoman

I hunt alone, dahling! What kind of sugar daddy would I land with all the gorgeous women of Pricescope in tow, I ask you?

You can have the sugar daddies, Kenny and I call dibs on the buff ones....

But Arkie, buff=young=no money!

 

[kenny]

And here I was thinking rich bitches that walk their kids on leashes won the prize for the most controversial.........
Jambalaya now your secret is out everyone wants you for their wingwoman

I hunt alone, dahling! What kind of sugar daddy would I land with all the gorgeous women of Pricescope in tow, I ask you?

You can have the sugar daddies, Kenny and I call dibs on the buff ones....

Well ... Okay.
But I go first.

 

[AGBF]

On the other side of the spectrum is poverty. Just as people are reluctant to classify themselves as wealthy, I don't know a single poor person who thinks of themselves as poor. There is always someone worse off. For instance, my colleague who earns around US$300 a month, collects glass bottles at work to give to her cousin so that she can sell them for cash. The cousin, whose only income is this income from bottle selling, doesn't think of herself as poor and uses some of her bottle selling income to buy bread for "the poor". Through the Aids centre I volunteer at, I know several child headed households. One which stands out is a 16 year old girl who is caring for her 13 and 8 year old siblings and does so with an income of $60 per month, a $10 food parcel a month and some help with school stationery and school uniforms. Believe it or not, she doesn't think they're poor either! She feels she's fortunate because she lives in a brick house and she and her siblings go to school. To her, poverty is living in a tin shack and not being able to go to school.

Everything is, indeed, relative. I began reading this thread not with shame about my wealth, but with envy about the relative wealth of some others who were posting. Because ten years ago I was in an higher income bracket than I am now and, although I rarely think about it and rarely miss the money, threads like this do make me think about it! And it is stupid of me to be envious. There is really nothing in my life that I want. I just like the idea of being wealthier!

The day before yesterday my brother came down from northern Connecticut to give me a hand with the household here after the snowstorm. Before he left he mentioned he was taking part in a homeless survey. I asked how he did that. He said it was interesting and started to explain it to me. As he started to speak I realized that it might be part of his job since he works for HUD (The Department of Housing and Urban Development). I don't know whether it is part of his job or not. It may be a volunteer position; he does a lot of community, volunteer, work.

At any rate, people-like my brother-go to shelters and some go and look under bridges and places where the homeless sleep. It all done on one specific day in January throughout the country. There is an interview that the person must go through in order to get a $5.00 (I believe he said $5.00) CVS card. It includes questions such as: Were you ever incarcerated? Were ever in jail? Were you ever in prison? Were you ever on drugs? Are you on drugs? etc.

My brother said that the CVS card is a huge incentive to these people who have absolutely nothing.

I have to say that not only did I come away feeling grateful for what I had, but feeling proud of my brother. He graduated from college with honors and Phi Beta Kappa. He became a lawyer. He didn't have to go into housing law to help the poor or get an MSW at the same time. He is a good guy.

 

[jaysonsmom]

Yes, wealth is definitely relative. Both my husband and I work for big global corporations, and our household income puts us in the upper echelon on the wage calculators. However, as I mentioned on page one, I have never thought of myself as wealthy...only comfortable, because we live in Southern California where real estate is sky high (high mortgage payment), we have 2 kids about to start driving, and heading to college, and while we have a nice house, there are literally mansions within the 3 mile radius where corporate CEOs dwell with stay at home trophy wives who do not need to work.

 

[Laila619]

To many people, comfortable = wealthy. If one is comfortable, presumably they don't worry about how they are going to pay their bills, they have everything they need, and they have money left over for savings and fun/frivolous spending.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Yes, wealth is definitely relative. Both my husband and I work for big global corporations, and our household income puts us in the upper echelon on the wage calculators. However, as I mentioned on page one, I have never thought of myself as wealthy...only comfortable, because we live in Southern California where real estate is sky high (high mortgage payment), we have 2 kids about to start driving, and heading to college, and while we have a nice house, there are literally mansions within the 3 mile radius where corporate CEOs dwell with stay at home trophy wives who do not need to work.

That's the time when I started to feel poor!...

 

[qtiekiki]

I am surprised that the calculator puts us as upper. I definitely don't feel like we are in that category. We don't have to worry about paying bills paycheck to paycheck. We are much better off than our parents. But definitely, not a lot of disposable cash/fund.