The Sleepless Toddler Thread

[VegasAngel]

My ped never suggested supplements but I do give my daughter vitamins. Actually, my ped. has never had any concerns about my daughter being small.

 

[vespergirl]

Hi guys, sorry to threadjack, but Demelza, since you asked about my son''s eating problems, here''s how it is with him. He is 22 months old and weighs about 24 lbs. He is in the 90th percentile for height and the 5th for weight (that''s five, not fifty!). Since he was born, he was always very tall, but very thin. Both my husband and I are tall (he 6''3" and I 5''9") and I have always been on the thinner side of "normal", while he was always "skinny", until he hit about 35, now he''s about "normal."

First, my son didn''t really care about milk - he nursed pretty regularly as a small infant, but when he still wasn''t really gaining after abouyt a month, the dr. had me add formula to help him pu on weight. He still didn''t, and when we started introducing solids at about 6 months, he didn''t care for anything but cereal and pureed vegetables. At one, he still wouldn''t eat solids - no Cheerios or meat, or anything he had to chew. He wasn''t eating anything thicker than yogurt until he was about 15 months, even though I cooked for him every day and offered him everything under the sun.

At 18 months, he dropped off the weight chart, so the dr. tested for celiac disease and a whole bunch of other digestive disorders. At 18 months he would have about 4 bowel movements a day still, which also concerned him. But, when the tests all came back negative, he said that''s probably just his metabolism, since he has thin parents, and left it at that.

Since I couldn''t stand watching his friends gobble cookies while he would do nothing but drink milk, I brought him to an occupational therapist for eating issues at 18 months. She said that he was using food as a power struggle, since I was so obsessed with him eating, so she said that if he smacked at the spoon, made me fetch a million toys, and throw and spit out his food (manipulation tactics), then I should just ignore him, hand him a spoon and let him try to eat on his own. She also had me introduce luympier foods, having me coarsely puree real food instead of feeding him babyfood. For 5 days, he went along with it, and ate like an angel without misbehaving, throwing food, or spitting anything out. But, on day 6, once he realized that we weren''t going back to the drama and games, he totally stopped eating - nothing bu milk for 2 days. After 1 day of him not eating I gave in & did anything I could to get him to eat, but he kept refusing food for a couple of days before it went back to normal. He lost a pound, and I freaked out & called her - she told me that it''s rare, but some kids really are not motivated by food. She thought that if I took his food away when he misbehaved or threw it he would behave so he could eat, but that didn''t work for him - he didn''t care, he just wouldn''t eat at all.

So, after spending $400 for my son to lose weight, I did take the piece of advice that said that I should not entertain the drama at mealtime - just put the food in front of him, and sit next to him and eat myself, but not to pay attention or act like I cared if he was eating or not. This actually eventually started to work. He now mostly feeds himself, and he says "help" if he needs me to help him with his spoon or something. When I stopped acting so interested in what he was eating or not eating, he started eating better.

He still doesn''t like to chew meat unless it''s ground beef or fish, but he''ll get there. Sometimes I think he lives on ravioli alfredo (his favorite), but whatever, if it''s what he wants to eat, I''m happy, as long as he has something. He does drink a lot of milk, but I refuse to limit his milk because I still think it''s the perfect food for kids under 2.

I do give him a multivitamin with iron, just to give myself peace of mind - I mix it in with his oatmeal in the morning.

Now he''s about 34" high, and weighs about 24 pounds. He''s still tall and thin, but that''s always what his dad was like during his childhood, so I figure it''s just in the genes

 

[Demelza]

AGSHF -- Thanks for thinking of me and for the support. We're going on night 4; I'm really hoping for a better night tonight, but I don't expect any miracles. I'm going to keep my expectations low and maybe I'll be surprised.

In regards to supplementing with vitamins, it's my understanding that the only nutrient a nursing toddler might be lacking is iron. Our ped did recommend giving her an iron supplement because she eats virtually no meat and her iron levels were a bit low, but he has not recommended anything else other than a varied diet. I think he thinks my daughter is thin not because she's not getting enough food, but because she just has a high metabolism.

Vespergirl -- I'm sorry to hear about your struggles with your son's eating. I can definitely relate. I think your approach to just let him eat however much he wants is a good one. There's a book you might be interested in called Child of Mine by Ellyn Satter. Her advice is simply to provide your child with a variety of healthy foods and let him do the rest. Anyway, I'm glad that things have gotten better. It sounds like your son is just genetically predisposed to being tall and thin. My daughter is the same way (well, minus the tall part -- she's always been in the 10-25th percentile for height, but so am I at only 5'2). Both my husband and I are thin, and my husband's side of the family has insane metabolisms -- my husband used to put half and half on his cereal and has always been thin as a rail. The way I look at it, they're lucky that they probably won't have to worry about their weight the way many people do. I am curious, though, about your doctor being concerned about your son pooping so frequently. My daughter poops at least 4 times a day -- what might that be an indication of?

Vegas Angel -- That's interesting that your doctor has never been concerned about your daughter's size. Has he always just chalked it up to genetics? Is she an okay sleeper now?

 

[AGSHF]

Hang in there--it''ll happen. All I can think of is, better now than when she''s older and even more determined, and there are places to go and things to do the next day.

Well, our pedi supplemented my daughter with fluoride drops when she was still an infant and Polyvisol (sp?) drops (largely for iron but had other vitamins, etc.) when she was a bit older. The Polyvisol drops smelled awful but she actually took to them quite readily. By age 1-1/2, my daughter was really only nursing in the a.m. and at night and, if I remember correctly, once in the afternoon. Hardly enough to keep her full, so the rest of the day, she''d have cereal, baby foods, toddler finger foods or Cheerios and have some milk.

 

[vespergirl]

Date: 9/25/2008 12:51:18 AM
Author: Demelza
AGSHF -- Thanks for thinking of me and for the support. We''re going on night 4; I''m really hoping for a better night tonight, but I don''t expect any miracles. I''m going to keep my expectations low and maybe I''ll be surprised.

In regards to supplementing with vitamins, it''s my understanding that the only nutrient a nursing toddler might be lacking is iron. Our ped did recommend giving her an iron supplement because she eats virtually no meat and her iron levels were a bit low, but he has not recommended anything else other than a varied diet. I think he thinks my daughter is thin not because she''s not getting enough food, but because she just has a high metabolism.

Vespergirl -- I''m sorry to hear about your struggles with your son''s eating. I can definitely relate. I think your approach to just let him eat however much he wants is a good one. There''s a book you might be interested in called Child of Mine by Ellyn Satter. Her advice is simply to provide your child with a variety of healthy foods and let him do the rest. Anyway, I''m glad that things have gotten better. It sounds like your son is just genetically predisposed to being tall and thin. My daughter is the same way (well, minus the tall part -- she''s always been in the 10-25th percentile for height, but so am I at only 5''2). Both my husband and I are thin, and my husband''s side of the family has insane metabolisms -- my husband used to put half and half on his cereal and has always been thin as a rail. The way I look at it, they''re lucky that they probably won''t have to worry about their weight the way many people do. I am curious, though, about your doctor being concerned about your son pooping so frequently. My daughter poops at least 4 times a day -- what might that be an indication of?

Vegas Angel -- That''s interesting that your doctor has never been concerned about your daughter''s size. Has he always just chalked it up to genetics? Is she an okay sleeper now?

Hi Demelza! At first the dr. was afraid that frequent pooping was chronic diarrhea, or maybe a sign of a metabolic disorder like celiac disease. The consistency of the poop was normal, though, and blood tests revealed that he has no diseases that would cause any of the digestive/eating issues. Basically, since he''s stayed on the same weight chart since he was born (he''s always been only 5% weight percentile) the doctor said that at this point, we should just chalk it up to a very fast metabolism, that''s just his body type. My husband was 6''3" 148 lbs. when he graduated high school, so I guess our son is headed the same way. Since he is super-active (he never sits still!) happy and healthy, the dr. said that he is obviously thriving, so as long as he eats something, we shouldn''t worry about it.

The less worried I am, the better he eats. I think now that he sees that I "act" like I don''t care whether he eats or not, he is eating a lot more.