these days...2 ct is the norm ?

[canuk-gal]

About 5 years ago, one of my colleagues came to me for advice about a diamond for an e-ring for his girlfriend. I about fell off my chair when he said she wanted a 3 carat diamond! If he bought online, that probably would have been about 3-4 months gross salary for him, so technically do-able I guess, but they were also buying a house (very expensive in our city). No one in the under 50 age range at our firm sports a rock that big, nor do the wives. I gave him advice about cut, color, clarity, etc. He ended up buying her a beautiful RB in the 2 ct range, and it looks huge on her tiny finger. I don't know where she got the idea or nerve to suggest 3 ct.

I know I'll be kicked all over PS for this, but I find this comment offensive. What has "nerve" got to do with it or anything else for that matter?

It seems to me fiance's ask their intended' "what they would like or want". And they tell them. I know my fiancee did and while I did not give him any ballpark or size range I would like to believe he asked me b/c he wanted to know what I truely desired.. .33 points or 33 carats, notwithstanding, would I not have been able to say? How is that "nervy or arrogant or entitled"?

Am I missing something here?

Sharon

 

[vintagelover229]

Chemgirl: thanks for letting me know the size you've seen. I didn't see to many bigger ones at the store either. We live in a very Asian populated community (York region) and from what I've read on PS their culture tends to buy colorless/flawless diamonds of smaller size than larger diamonds with lower stats. I haven't seen to many big ones and so I wasn't sure it was bc of the main culture practices in this area or the norm for Canada in general.

Here is the link to my thread I started way back in may! It's under a different user name though so just scroll though the pics bc there's a good one of the prongs in one of them.
[URL='https://www.pricescope.com/forum/post2571145.html#p2571145']https://www.pricescope.com/forum/post2571145.html#p2571145[/URL]

 

[athenaworth]

Someone my DH works with tells a story (with glee) that when her boyfriend proposed with a one carat princess, she told him yes, but said that they'd have to go out and get a 2 carat before she'd tell anyone that they were engaged. So yeah, there are some people out there like that.

 

[FuturePsyD]

Unfortunately, where I live (Los Angeles), 2 ct is seen as the bare minimum. If you have anything smaller than that, your ring is totally overlooked and seen as boring and small, even if its a designer ring (Tiffany, Cartier, HW).

It's all about size, size, size out here. In my circle of relatives, friends, acquaintances, (and none of us are rich btw, just middle class) I only know of 1 person with a ring smaller than 2 carats, and she isn't thrilled about it to be honest.

It's actually gotten very annoying that you are made to feel that if you get anything under 2, your fiance is cheap, doesn't love you enough, doesn't have good taste, is broke, etc.

 

[Circe]

About 5 years ago, one of my colleagues came to me for advice about a diamond for an e-ring for his girlfriend. I about fell off my chair when he said she wanted a 3 carat diamond! If he bought online, that probably would have been about 3-4 months gross salary for him, so technically do-able I guess, but they were also buying a house (very expensive in our city). No one in the under 50 age range at our firm sports a rock that big, nor do the wives. I gave him advice about cut, color, clarity, etc. He ended up buying her a beautiful RB in the 2 ct range, and it looks huge on her tiny finger. I don't know where she got the idea or nerve to suggest 3 ct.

I know I'll be kicked all over PS for this, but I find this comment offensive. What has "nerve" got to do with it or anything else for that matter?

It seems to me fiance's ask their intended' "what they would like or want". And they tell them. I know my fiancee did and while I did not give him any ballpark or size range I would like to believe he asked me b/c he wanted to know what I truely desired.. .33 points or 33 carats, notwithstanding, would I not have been able to say? How is that "nervy or arrogant or entitled"?

Am I missing something here?

Sharon

I ain't gonna kick ya ... I was wondering the same thing. Indulging my usual pleasure in literary analysis, since Kay says the dude earned roughly the salary that's usually commensurate with that kind of outlay, my guess would be that it's sentence #4 that's the biggest hint: by the standards of the culture, it was ostentatious. Good confirmation of the advice you see all the time in RockyTalk to go off what the bride-to-be's circle is wearing!

Hey, Sharon, since you didn't mention price or size ... am I right in guessing that you indicated shape and maybe cut or clarity? I'm backwards-formulating a kind of etiquette of what it's okay for women to specify, and that sounds like it meshes with most of what I've heard/read. (By "okay," I mean by broad social standards, not my own.) (And, in the same vein, I do hope I'm not offending anybody: I just like playing armchair anthropologist on issues like these.)

 

[zoebartlett]

Among my close friends and family, I don't know anyone with a 2ct. diamond solitaire. Maybe it's the cttw in a three stone ring (which some of my friends have) though -- I'm not sure. None of them have really talked about the stats of the diamonds in their rings, and I haven't asked. I only see that info. here on PS. It's funny, things are SO different here than in my life away from PS.

 

[yssie]

Well I did get much more attention in Baltimore bridal boutiques than out here in Palo Alto


In my circle... I'm really the only with/who wanted/wants a (non-heirloom) diamond. Our friends/friends' SOs all want sapphires, my SIL didn't want a stone period, my other SIL proudly wears DH's great-grandmother's ring... so yeah, I'm the odd one out there, too.

 

[FuturePsyD]

BTW, Does anyone know what the average size is in So Cal area?

I am curious to know if I have a skewed outlook on the norm in e-rings based upon the rings of those in my social circle.

 

[Circe]

BTW, Does anyone know what the average size is in So Cal area?

I am curious to know if I have a skewed outlook on the norm in e-rings based upon the rings of those in my social circle.

DO NOT ask Dancing Fire. Or, if you do, take the answer with a grain of salt ....

 

[ForteKitty]

where in S. Cal? south bay, PV, SGV, west LA, the valley...

 

[FuturePsyD]

BTW, Does anyone know what the average size is in So Cal area?

I am curious to know if I have a skewed outlook on the norm in e-rings based upon the rings of those in my social circle.

DO NOT ask Dancing Fire. Or, if you do, take the answer with a grain of salt ....

Oh boy, is he going to tell me 2.50+ or some such currently unattainable size?

 

[FuturePsyD]

where in S. Cal? south bay, PV, SGV, west LA, the valley...

In the San Fernando Valley. But I also have friends and family who live in the West LA area.

 

[athenaworth]

I'm curious about LA too. West side. Not including Bev Hills. That'll just eff up the whole average.

 

[ForteKitty]

Most of my friends have gotten 1.3-2ct. (eta: mostly between 1.3 and 1.5... there's only one 2ct and one 1.8.) They're scattered around PV, hermosa/manhattan beach, arcadia/san marino/pasadena/sgv, and some in west LA. But they also dont really care about diamonds or name brand stuff tho.. they spend their money on vacations and good food.

 

[athenaworth]

I'm definitely the only one of my friends who has a bigger stone, but all of my friends are "starving artists" and DH and I are the only ones with full time jobs, so I'm not sure if I'm a good gauge.

 

[RissaLou]

I work in the Cherry Creek Colorado area and the Norm I see on a daily basis looks to be about 1.8-2.5, which definitely gives me a case of DSS But when I go home which is NOT in Cherry Creek I feel much more comfortable with my 3/8ct center stone which is actually larger than most who tend to have about a .25-.30 or 1cttw cluster or illusion setting. Not to say I don't "dream" about having a 2.5, but I would never demand or expect anything other than love from my husband. Now I have been BADLY wanting a slightly larger stone, something over .50, and even though my husband would get me anything I want, I just don't feel right about spending money on non-essentials when we both work 55 hours a week and have tons to save for like a house and retirement, so I came up with a solution on my own and sold all the "small" jewelry items that I don't wear like gemstone rings, lux jewelry from Brighton and so forth, and used those funds for a RHR with a .70 center which I am SUPER excited for I know I just rambled and did one huge run on sentence so I appologize for that

 

[FuturePsyD]

I'm curious about LA too. West side. Not including Bev Hills. That'll just eff up the whole average.

My thoughts exactly! Love the area, but that small, over-the-top city is a whole separate world!

 

[FuturePsyD]

Most of my friends have gotten 1.3-2ct. (eta: mostly between 1.3 and 1.5... there's only one 2ct and one 1.8.) They're scattered around PV, hermosa/manhattan beach, arcadia/san marino/pasadena/sgv, and some in west LA. But they also dont really care about diamonds or name brand stuff tho.. they spend their money on vacations and good food.

Ok, so not TOO different from what my experience is. I think those around me are a bit more into e-rings and such, which accounts for the slightly larger sizes.

 

[ForteKitty]

Most of my friends have gotten 1.3-2ct. (eta: mostly between 1.3 and 1.5... there's only one 2ct and one 1.8.) They're scattered around PV, hermosa/manhattan beach, arcadia/san marino/pasadena/sgv, and some in west LA. But they also dont really care about diamonds or name brand stuff tho.. they spend their money on vacations and good food.

Ok, so not TOO different from what my experience is. I think those around me are a bit more into e-rings and such, which accounts for the slightly larger sizes.

haha.. my friends' typical weekend involves either skiing, camping, or rockclimbing... so yea.. not too into jewelry. They think i'm crazy and would probably keel over if they knew how much i spent on colored gems lately, but wouldn't bat an eye when booking a trip to Europe.

 

[Dancing Fire]

About 5 years ago, one of my colleagues came to me for advice about a diamond for an e-ring for his girlfriend. I about fell off my chair when he said she wanted a 3 carat diamond! If he bought online, that probably would have been about 3-4 months gross salary for him, so technically do-able I guess, but they were also buying a house (very expensive in our city). No one in the under 50 age range at our firm sports a rock that big, nor do the wives. I gave him advice about cut, color, clarity, etc. He ended up buying her a beautiful RB in the 2 ct range, and it looks huge on her tiny finger. I don't know where she got the idea or nerve to suggest 3 ct.

never hurt to ask...

 

[Dancing Fire]

BTW, Does anyone know what the average size is in So Cal area?

I am curious to know if I have a skewed outlook on the norm in e-rings based upon the rings of those in my social circle.

the avg in Rancho Santa Fe is 3.5ct...

 

[manderz]

I have the largest in my social circle at 1.04. But, we live in a small town, and it was a depressed area with high unemployment before the recession hit. My mom's was about 10 points, my maternal grandmother's was around 5 points, and I don't know if my paternal grandmother even had one (she was divorced long before I was born). My friends are all around 1/3 to 1/2.

 

[monarch64]

I have a 1.3 currently...in this small Midwestern Big10 university town, 2 carats is not unheard of or unseen, but definitely not the norm. The townspeople are either very academic and into being green and investing rather than displaying wealth, or are (in the minority mindset) of being a bit over-the-top and wearing huge diamonds (upwards of 2 carats.) It's a strange dynamic. I work for an indepently-owned outdoor/adventure store featuring fun outdoor toys like kayaks, canoes, climbing, skis, snowboards, etc. and just a few weeks ago a lady and her husband were in having their skis overhauled. The lady was sporting a gorgeous 4-5 carat marquise on her left ring finger and I commented on it to a long-time manager after she left. He stated that "it was probably fake--no one wears diamonds that big around here if they actually have money." I didn't say anything... So...apparently if I actually wore a 2 carat center stone (or larger) here, people would just think it was fake. Sheesh. Again, weird dynamic.

 

[FuturePsyD]

BTW, Does anyone know what the average size is in So Cal area?

I am curious to know if I have a skewed outlook on the norm in e-rings based upon the rings of those in my social circle.

the avg in Rancho Santa Fe is 3.5ct...

Ok, I had to look this place up and I believe you're right! Wikipedia states that it is one of the highest income communities in the US with average income at $245,000+!

 

[Kay]

About 5 years ago, one of my colleagues came to me for advice about a diamond for an e-ring for his girlfriend. I about fell off my chair when he said she wanted a 3 carat diamond! If he bought online, that probably would have been about 3-4 months gross salary for him, so technically do-able I guess, but they were also buying a house (very expensive in our city). No one in the under 50 age range at our firm sports a rock that big, nor do the wives. I gave him advice about cut, color, clarity, etc. He ended up buying her a beautiful RB in the 2 ct range, and it looks huge on her tiny finger. I don't know where she got the idea or nerve to suggest 3 ct.

She had the 'nerve' because she felt entitled. OR, ask for the HUGE rock, get the large rock instead. Beats the heck out of asking for a 2 ct. and getting the 1 ct. Maybe it was a strategic move on her part.

I have to admit, I have wondered if she asked for 3 ct just so the 2 ct she "settled" for would seem more reasonable. Brilliant strategy actually if it was planned.

I guess the concept seemed foreign to me at the time since when my then FI and I were shopping, I told him to spend no more than X (about 1 month's net salary). He was willing to spend more, but I knew I could get exactly what I wanted for that amount with careful shopping and I also knew we had other expenses, like house payments, repairs and remodeling, retirement savings, wedding, etc. that were more important.

 

[Kay]

About 5 years ago, one of my colleagues came to me for advice about a diamond for an e-ring for his girlfriend. I about fell off my chair when he said she wanted a 3 carat diamond! If he bought online, that probably would have been about 3-4 months gross salary for him, so technically do-able I guess, but they were also buying a house (very expensive in our city). No one in the under 50 age range at our firm sports a rock that big, nor do the wives. I gave him advice about cut, color, clarity, etc. He ended up buying her a beautiful RB in the 2 ct range, and it looks huge on her tiny finger. I don't know where she got the idea or nerve to suggest 3 ct.

I know I'll be kicked all over PS for this, but I find this comment offensive. What has "nerve" got to do with it or anything else for that matter?

It seems to me fiance's ask their intended' "what they would like or want". And they tell them. I know my fiancee did and while I did not give him any ballpark or size range I would like to believe he asked me b/c he wanted to know what I truely desired.. .33 points or 33 carats, notwithstanding, would I not have been able to say? How is that "nervy or arrogant or entitled"?

Am I missing something here?

Sharon

I ain't gonna kick ya ... I was wondering the same thing. Indulging my usual pleasure in literary analysis, since Kay says the dude earned roughly the salary that's usually commensurate with that kind of outlay, my guess would be that it's sentence #4 that's the biggest hint: by the standards of the culture, it was ostentatious. Good confirmation of the advice you see all the time in RockyTalk to go off what the bride-to-be's circle is wearing!

You know, I probably shouldn't have used the word "nerve." I think some of her other behaviour over the years, and the fact that they are currently in the middle of a divorce, set me off a bit.

In our circle, 3 ct seemed like an outrageous request. She may have thrown the # out there without knowing the cost. A few colleagues who were older and making more money got engaged around that same time with rings in the 1-1.5 ct range.

A salary in the $100-150K range seems like it would support a 30-40K diamond. However, once you pay about 40-45% of that in federal and state income and payroll taxes, pay another $10K per year in property taxes, $4k or more per month for a mortgage, plus student loans, there isn't much "disposable" income to spend.

 

[jaysonsmom]

I live in So Cal, right where they film the Real House Wives of OC, and I'd say the average size is only about 1 carat. Most of my social circle have around 1 ct. I see a lot of 0.5-0.75 original e-rings, and some of 2-3 carat upgrades that they bought after they "made it"

The way I distinguish originals from upgrades is by looking at the setting. If I see a 50+ year old wearing a platinum pave type ring, it's probably an upgrade (or second or thrid marriage) because the metal and style was not popular when they were younger

 

[Kay]

I live in So Cal, right where they film the Real House Wives of OC, and I'd say the average size is only about 1 carat. Most of my social circle have around 1 ct. I see a lot of 0.5-0.75 original e-rings, and some of 2-3 carat upgrades that they bought after they "made it"

The way I distinguish originals from upgrades is by looking at the setting. If I see a 50+ year old wearing a platinum pave type ring, it's probably an upgrade (or second or thrid marriage) because the metal and style was not popular when they were younger

One of the older female partners with whom I work has a Tiffany e-ring in the 0.5 - 0.75 ct range. She also has a stunning OEC RHR that appears to be about 9-10 mm in diameter. I love that she has the original, plus the "upgrade."

 

[Dancing Fire]

BTW, Does anyone know what the average size is in So Cal area?

I am curious to know if I have a skewed outlook on the norm in e-rings based upon the rings of those in my social circle.

the avg in Rancho Santa Fe is 3.5ct...

Ok, I had to look this place up and I believe you're right! Wikipedia states that it is one of the highest income communities in the US with average income at $245,000+!

had i ever lie to you guys?... all my statistics are correct...

 

[Dancing Fire]

I live in So Cal, right where they film the Real House Wives of OC, and I'd say the average size is only about 1 carat. Most of my social circle have around 1 ct. I see a lot of 0.5-0.75 original e-rings, and some of 2-3 carat upgrades that they bought after they "made it"

The way I distinguish originals from upgrades is by looking at the setting. If I see a 50+ year old wearing a platinum pave type ring, it's probably an upgrade (or second or thrid marriage) because the metal and style was not popular when they were younger

after 2 or 3 divorces a woman can afford what ever her little heart desires...yep,just take hubby to the cleaners...