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Thoughts on a Dress Change for Reception?

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FacetFire

FacetFire

Brilliant_Rock
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Jun 26, 2006
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What are your thoughts on changing dresses half-way through the evening? I am torn between two totally different styles, and I really want two very different looks, but I am afraid that changing dresses is just too over-the-top. What do you all think? Our wedding won''t be very big either, so is it just too pretentious? Thanks in advance for your thoughts!!!
 
If one is more casual and dance-ready, then by all means I say change into it at the reception! Personally, if I saw a bride change from one super fancy gown into another super fancy gown I might think it was a little much, but if it was from one fancy gown to a less formal dress, I think it''s a great idea. Some cultures it''s completely normal to have five or six different dresses throughout the evening, so have at it! :)
 
Hmmm well personally I''m anti-dress change, to me it''s just silly. What are the two styles you can''t choose between? I do understand the desire to look fabulous in different dresses for pictures you are keeping for the rest of your life though!

If they are 2 WEDDING DRESS dresses, you know like one is big and poufy and the other one is sleek and sexy but both are definitely wedding dresses that you could never wear unless you were getting married, I say pick a style and just wear one. But if one is more of a party dress that you want to change into and could maybe wear again, then I think it would make more sense. Post some pics!!
 
Well, I have to admit that I am a little bit crazy. Anyone who has followed my dress saga knows that. :)

I had bought a sample Vera Wang mermaid gown on a whim without anyone seeing it. But when I finally showed it to my mom and sister, they weren''t so sure that they liked it. So, I started searching for a new dress. However, I just haven''t been able to pull the trigger on anything. And we are now six months from the wedding, so I need to decide. I tried on that dress again and I do still really like it. However, part of me wants a more elegant look and part of me loves the very bridal look of the Vera mermaid gown. Here it is, my Vera sample dress:

VeraDressfor Internet.JPG
 
When I went looking with my mom and sister again, we found this one that they both loved on me. I also really like it, but didn''t want to wear just this dress because it didn''t feel wedding-gown-ish enough to me. It felt more like an elegant evening gown. But, I love how elegant it is and I love that my mom and sister love it on me. I think I could get it dyed black after the wedding and have a gorgeous evening gown. But, I''m getting ahead of myself. I was thinking that this could be a good reception dress, since we have decided to have cocktails and dessert aboard a boat, and the flowing material would be a lot more comfortable to be in. Anyway, here it is:

ReemDress for internet.JPG
 
But, basically, I am just crazy. At this point, I am throwing out ideas because I just don''t know if I have liked any one dress enough to purchase to take the place of the orginal Vera sample I bought. But, I don''t know if the Vera is elegant enough to be the only dress also. I am driving myself crazy. What is it about THE DRESS that makes otherwise rational brides nuts?
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Facet,

I dont think you should change your dress.....try to pick one and just stick with it! Honestly, the wedding just goes so fast, before you know it its over....I cant even imagine having to leave the reception to go and change my dress...the whole night went by in a flash! Both of those dresses are just lovely- you really cant go wrong!

Good luck!
 
go with the vera. honestly. it brings out your figure so much better. you have a great, subtle hourglass curve in it, it enlogates you, makes you look perfectly balanced. you look smashing in it.

the other dress is a lovely dress. yes. but, honest opinion? it makes you look so straight up and down and does absolutely nothing for your bum or boobs in all honesty. it''s quite drab in comparison.

i know you want your mom and sister to like your dress, but i think they will love it once they see you all doo-dee-da''d up in your make up and hair with a veil (if you''re doing one). besides, wear what makes you feel good. and on the looking good part? dress #1 for sure.

Cheers!
 
Date: 11/16/2007 12:46:11 PM
Author: cellososweet
go with the vera. honestly. it brings out your figure so much better. you have a great, subtle hourglass curve in it, it enlogates you, makes you look perfectly balanced. you look smashing in it.

the other dress is a lovely dress. yes. but, honest opinion? it makes you look so straight up and down and does absolutely nothing for your bum or boobs in all honesty. it''s quite drab in comparison.

i know you want your mom and sister to like your dress, but i think they will love it once they see you all doo-dee-da''d up in your make up and hair with a veil (if you''re doing one). besides, wear what makes you feel good. and on the looking good part? dress #1 for sure.

Cheers!
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Ditto. I know your family loves that gown... but having closely followed your dress saga, that dress isn''t doing anything for your cute figure.
 
I would go with one dress. Maybe if your wedding was an all-day thing I would suggest getting two different dresses, but most wedding ceremonies are, what? 20 minutes to an hour long? Pick one dress and OWN IT! It's your only time to wear one.

I would also go with the Vera. I actually like the bottom one better than the Vera, but you know what I see in the bottom dress? A very distinct ARROW pointing right up at your HOOHAA!

If you could find a dress similar in style to #2 with a different detailing pattern, I'd go for that. It's very beautiful otherwise!
 
Did you try to sell the Vera? I feel like I saw it for sale on preownedweddingdresses or ebay or something? Hahaha I was absolutely obsessed so maybe all the dresses are running together in my mind.

I really love the Vera, it looks so great on you, and I know I''m echoing what everyone else said, but I agree that the second one doesn''t do much for your figure at all. I really don''t know who it would flatter!! Not a skinny girl with no boobs, and not a bigger girl either! The Vera just looks fantastic. Plus, it''s Vera Wang!!! You really can''t go wrong with her.
 
Date: 11/16/2007 12:18:52 PM
Author: FacetFire
But, basically, I am just crazy. At this point, I am throwing out ideas because I just don''t know if I have liked any one dress enough to purchase to take the place of the orginal Vera sample I bought. But, I don''t know if the Vera is elegant enough to be the only dress also. I am driving myself crazy. What is it about THE DRESS that makes otherwise rational brides nuts?
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How many women .. ordinary, everyday, non-celebrity women .. get to wear Vera Wang? And, at a sample sale price? Darn few!

In your own words, you said that you hadn''t found anything you liked as much as the Vera Wang. How could it be possible that a V Wang would not be "elegant enough"? If you bought it because of the name and great price, but aren''t in love with the style, then sell it and go looking for THE DRESS. The two dresses, while strapless, are miles apart in style ..... so which style really speaks to YOUR heart? This process isn''t about what your Mom or sister like; it''s about what makes you feel beautiful and bridal.

I cannot fathom having two wedding dresses; mine was too special to me. That''s the kind of feeling you want to have about your dress.

Did you even consider that you might be the subject of some rather unkind conversations among your guests? We''ve all been to weddings where we thought, and sometimes shared with a close companion, "What was she thinking?" Don''t kid yourself, if you''re Ms. Ordinary from the Real World of Regular Folks, and not some really rich or fabulously famous person, there will be talk about your two-dress wedding. Some talk will be "Wow, it''s so cool, she''s got two dresses." Other talk will be "Well, isn''t that special; she had to have two dresses!" People are just people, and it''s gonna happen.

On the other hand, if you want an over-the-top dress to walk down the aisle in, and something less fussy and bridal to eat and dance in, go ahead. It can be white or ivory and have a bridal feel; it just should not be another wedding dress. This would be an especially great idea if your reception does not immediately follow the ceremony.
 
I think the Vera is much more wedding-y than the other gown, and I would wear it throughout the wedding festivities. I agree with the previous posters that the non-Vera doesn''t do much for your figure, and I must say that I immediately noticed the arrow-hoohah issue that misysu pointed out.

You said you loved the Vera until your mom & sister expressed their apprehension about it. I think it looks amazing on you and you should wear the dress YOU want to wear, regardless of what your mom & sister think. I know it''s difficult to ignore the opinions of people who are so close to you, but it is your wedding, after all.
 
If your wedding is over 100 people, I don''t think its over-the-top ---albeit, I come from a culture that expects at least one or two dress changes through the wedding night! (I''m starting with a chinese 2 piece dress for tea ceremony, vera wang style wedding dress for wedding ceremony and part of reception, chinese cheong sam for toasting, and a final short party dress to dance in) My mom is a bit disappointed that I''m not including another long evening gown to the whole she-bang!

Anyway, I love the second dress - if you have the budget, I say go for it! It looks fabulous and I can see you being able to move in it easier than the Vera Wang one. Its your day, do what you feel is comfortable and reflects your personality.

Did you even consider that you might be the subject of some rather unkind conversations among your guests? We''ve all been to weddings where we thought, and sometimes shared with a close companion, "What was she thinking?" Don''t kid yourself, if you''re Ms. Ordinary from the Real World of Regular Folks, and not some really rich or fabulously famous person, there will be talk about your two-dress wedding. Some talk will be "Wow, it''s so cool, she''s got two dresses." Other talk will be "Well, isn''t that special; she had to have two dresses!" People are just people, and it''s gonna happen.
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If all brides were to start considering the sort of unkind comments guests were to make at their weddings - I don''t think anyone would leave the house.
 
Date: 11/16/2007 2:10:14 PM
Author: chinglish
If your wedding is over 100 people, I don''t think its over-the-top ---albeit, I come from a culture that expects at least one or two dress changes through the wedding night! (I''m starting with a chinese 2 piece dress for tea ceremony, vera wang style wedding dress for wedding ceremony and part of reception, chinese cheong sam for toasting, and a final short party dress to dance in) My mom is a bit disappointed that I''m not including another long evening gown to the whole she-bang!

Anyway, I love the second dress - if you have the budget, I say go for it! It looks fabulous and I can see you being able to move in it easier than the Vera Wang one. Its your day, do what you feel is comfortable and reflects your personality.


Did you even consider that you might be the subject of some rather unkind conversations among your guests? We''ve all been to weddings where we thought, and sometimes shared with a close companion, ''What was she thinking?'' Don''t kid yourself, if you''re Ms. Ordinary from the Real World of Regular Folks, and not some really rich or fabulously famous person, there will be talk about your two-dress wedding. Some talk will be ''Wow, it''s so cool, she''s got two dresses.'' Other talk will be ''Well, isn''t that special; she had to have two dresses!'' People are just people, and it''s gonna happen.
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If all brides were to start considering the sort of unkind comments guests were to make at their weddings - I don''t think anyone would leave the house.
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FacetFire is not going to be meeting any cultural expectations regarding the number of dress/costume changes she makes on her big day. Huge difference in the eyes of her guests. If she ultimately chooses something that makes her feel beautiful and she is radiant in it, that''s what her guests will see and talk about.
 
I''ve followed your dress saga, probably from the start, and it seems like all the dresses that you were the most excited about had mermaid styling like your Vera Wang.... so I''d suggest you go with the VW. It''s a beautiful dress that will look even more spectacular once it''s tailored to you. If you want a second dress I''d look for something a bit less formal, something that''s truly easier for you to maneuver around the boat in, unless you''re expecting all of your guests to be in formalwear.

BTW I was never a fan of that second dress on you. I too noticed the arrows, and I think it''s kind of matronly... it seems to have been designed with an older bride in mind.
 
i agree with dani, you''re spending too much time stressing on which dress when the day is going to fly by. Not that i''m dowplaying the importance of loving your dress, but both of these are beautiful so just choose one that your heart leans towards and don''t look back.

to me changing dresses half way through does seem OTT. it kind of seems diva-ish. sorry! also during my wedding i never changed from my dress even though it was a full day (almost 12 hrs from ceremony until post-reception drinks). i wanted everyone to have that image of me from beginning to end! changing dresses loses the fluidity of it al.
 
Personally I wouldn''t bother. Seriously, once I got to the reception I didn''t even touch up my lipstick (that I just had to have stashed in the bathroom)
It really does go by way too fast- I wanted to enjoy every single minute.
Plus, I wouldn'' t want to worry about the logistics of doing that, unless your reception is at a hotel where your room is right upstairs.

I DO understand the thing about second-guessing your dress- I did the same thing right up to the day of.
I was worried it would be too hot to dance in,etc. but once I had it on I didn''t want to take it off, and it all worked out fine.
 

I''m sorry, I just don''t agree with this whole line of reasoning regarding guest''s comments and impressions. There are always discontented, unhappy, spiteful, jealous (etc.) people. I don''t think other''s people''s issues or deficiencies should play any role in the decision making process. It''s her wedding day, regardless of her cultural norms, if she wants to wear ten dresses, IMO, she can. She can wear a red dress, a blue dress and a green dress... None of that matters.


I do think fact that the day goes by fast, that the arrow to the bum thing, and that the second gown is unflattering are good points.

 
I''m pretty new to PS so I don''t know much about your dress drama...but when I was scrolling down through the posts, I saw the ones of you in the VW mermaid dress and thought "how could she possibly consider a different dress than that? It''s amazing!" Then I scrolled a bit more and saw the second, and thought "oh, hmmm, that one is pretty, too." But it was nothing like my reaction to the first one. I honestly don''t know why your mom and sis wouldn''t like the VW, unless it''s just not their style...but it''s your wedding so it should be about your style, right? As a complete stranger, I say that your intuition was spot on, and you should go with the dress (or dresses) you love and be happy!
 
i have to say that my friend was trying on dresses within the same flowy style for her cabo wedding, but none of them really spoke to her. they didn''t feel wedding-y. then she tried on a big poofy champagne gown and loved it.

if it speaks to you, own that baby!! if not, i''d start looking for one that does, savez?
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I had a very similar dilemma. I had my wedding gown, a fancy, fluffy, fairy tale princess looking ball gown, but I also had my "going away dress." I had to have something to wear to the hotel b/c we were staying near the airport after our reception b/c we had to be at the airport at 7:00 the following morning to leave for our honeymoon. The hotel was about 1.5 hrs. from our venue, and we wanted to be able to just put my "going away" dress in the trunk and leave it there. (My mother cringed at the idea of me leaving my real wedding gown in the car for a week, so she insisted on the second dress) It was a tough time trying to decide just when to change into it b/c, like you, I didn''t want to see too silly/over the top. In the end I decided I would change into it right after our last dance, while the guests were making their way out to see us off with sparklers.

Even changing so close to the end of the reception was very rushed. Honestly, I was even a little sad to miss even that small part of the reception (not too sad, but I am the kinda girl who doesn''t like to miss anything). I am glad I didn''t have to change any earlier though b/c there are so many other things to do during the reception. You''ll have so much to think about while you are there that you probably won''t want one more thing to have to time perfectly/ remember to do.
 
I would go with the vera-I think it looks fab on you! I''m not too keen on the second dress-I think that you could wear a dress like that on any fancy night out, but the vera looks like it was made for you.
 
i love ther vera gown on you!!! It''s very unique and I remember you wanting a trumpet style dress originally, so it doesn''t matter what everyone else thinks. I think you pull it off really well and I''m not one to be fake and give compliments easily to just agree. I do, do ,do like it very much and don''t change you dress half way through the reception!!!! my 2 cents
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Hey Facet,

I have always loved that Vera. Do your mother and sister still not like it? Maybe it will grow on them.

I think the concept of changing is fine. But I''m not sure I''d change between those two dresses. I think if one changes, it should be a totally different level of formality, or shape, or something. They are different but I think they are still both strapless mermaid dresses with about the same level of fanciness. If you were contemplating changing into a short dress, or changing from a ball gown into dress #2, I think it would work better. As it is, it just kinda seems like you can''t make up your mind...no offense
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Hi Facet! I''m actually changing dresses during my ceremony. But I''m not wearing two "wedding" dresses, One is my wedding gown, which I adore, but I just don''t think i''ll be able to get down and dance and have a really good time in it. Plus, my reception ends at 12AM (reception hall rules) and many of our friends and family are planning on hitting a local club/bar right across the street after the reception is over (i know that may sound weird, but lots of people do this after having a reception in the hall that we chose)

SO - I can''t wear my gown to the bar to have fun, but I CAN wear a short, fun dress, so I bought this dress below in white.

I don''t know how I feel about two WEDDING dresses - I think you own all of those dresses up there....you look fabulous and I wouldn''t want to take it off at all! You look awesome in them! Unless you want another dress for practical reasons (like dancing...lol) then I would stick to one gown and OWN it!

Here''s the dress it got - but ordered it in white
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Vera Wang for wedding, and the dress your mom and sister like for the reception.
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I agree with most of the other girls that if there was a reason for a dress change, like cultural, or if the dress you wore for the ceremony would be difficult to dance and party in, then wearing a second dress makes sense. HOWEVER, the 2 dresses you picked don''t seem to fit this. Although they are definitely different, it''s not like one dress screams formal ceremony dress and the other screams party/dance dress. It sounds like your dream wasn''t to wear too dresses, you just can''t choose one because neither feels like it to you. Although both dresses are gorgeous, I would keep looking for the ONE.
 
I also vote for sticking with one dress. From what I''ve heard, the day flies by so quickly anyway, and to spend part of that time changing into a whole new dress seems unneccessary.
 
Thank you all SO much for the thoughts and opinions. At this point, I am either going to do the two dress thing, but with a different second dress (one the I love at much as my mom does and is more different that my first dress) or keep looking to find one dress that does it all. I tried on my Vera again, and I do really like it, but I can''t even bend over in it very well (which will even be worse after alterations take it down a couple sizes). The main problem with both if these ideas is that our wedding is exactly six months away, so I need to order in the next couple of weeks, max. I''ll let you all know what I decide! Thanks again!!!
 
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