What does "normal wear and tear" mean to you?

[LLJsmom]

A recent thread about a platinum pave e-ring being damaged after 6 months of use made me start thinking. I am curious to know how people define normal daily wear and tear. My suspicion is that it can vary greatly by individual. Maybe we can each share our ring type and specific usage conditions so we can get a better understanding of what regular wear and tear mean to different people. So curious to see how people wear their rings. I'll start.

Ring type: solitaire/three stone/halo
Width of shank and whether there is pave. If there is pave, what type if you know.
Metal:
How it was made and maker:
Often you wear it: 24/7, every day and take off to sleep, only when not at work
When do you NOT wear it?
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required
Rings that you wear next to it
Months / years you have been wearing it
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when you are wearing the ring

Ring type: solitaire ering (kinda ring pop head)
Width/pave: 2mm shank with bright cut pave, plus pave on prongs
Metal: platinum
Maker: Victor Canera / handforged
Wearing: 24/7, slept with it. Mostly work in front of a computer.
I did NOT wear it: doing dishes, cooking, working out, doing laundry, cleaning, vacuuming, carrying anything heavier than a 2-3 pounds (no young children), showering, no dogs so not worn holding leash,
Damage: usual patina on platinum, no deep scratches, never went out of round, no stones fell out
Stacking: 60% of the time one plain or eternity band next to it. 40% of the time worn alone.
Years worn: 4 years
Behavioral patterns: I noticed that when I grabbed things with my left hand, I would make sure whatever I was grabbing, if it was a hard surface, that the bottom of my ring did not come in contact with the hard surface, be it metal or rock, or even hard plastic. I curled my hand to avoid contact, such as when grabbing a car door handle or a door knob. I tried not to hit it against anything hard, even wood, aluminum, plastic, regardless of the material.

Ring type: 3 stone trellis ring
Width/pave: 3mm shank, no pave anywhere
Metal: platinum
Maker: Steven Kirsch / handforged
Wearing: 24/7, slept with it. Mostly work in front of a computer.
I did NOT wear it: doing dishes, cooking, working out, doing laundry, cleaning, vacuuming, carrying anything heavier than a 2-3 pounds (no young children), showering, no dogs so not worn holding leash,
Damage: usual patina on platinum, no deep scratches, never went out of round, no stones fell out
Stacking: 60% of the time one plain or eternity band next to it. 40% of the time worn alone.
Years worn: 4 months
Behavioral patterns: Same as above

Ring type: solitaire ering, bezel with bead set, with bezel set french cut side stones
Width/pave: 3+ mm tri-wire shank no pave
Metal: platinum
Maker: Victor Canera / handforged
Wearing: 24/7, slept with it. Mostly work in front of a computer.
I did NOT wear it: doing dishes, cooking, working out, doing laundry, cleaning, vacuuming, carrying anything heavier than a 2-3 pounds (no young children), showering, no dogs so not worn holding leash,
Damage: usual patina on platinum, no deep scratches, never went out of round, no stones fell out
Stacking: 60% of the time one plain or eternity band next to it. 40% of the time worn alone.
Years worn: 4 years
Behavioral patterns: Same as above

 

[josieKat]

Ring type: three stone
Width of shank and whether there is pave: 2mm tapering to 1.8, no pave
Metal: 14k white gold
How it was made and maker: cast, GOG
Often you wear it: 24/7
When do you NOT wear it? I never take it off, but would if I was using really caustic chemicals or working with/putting my hands on extremely rough materials like rock or concrete. I have a much wider knuckle so it is difficult to remove.
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: none
Rings that you wear next to it: plain 1.8mm wedding band
Months / years you have been wearing it: 3 years
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when you are wearing the ring: on my Hawaii honeymoon I held my hand carefully on a hike where we had to grab volcanic rocks on either side so I didn't scratch it up

 

[LLJsmom]

Ring type: three stone
Width of shank and whether there is pave: 2mm tapering to 1.8, no pave
Metal: 14k white gold
How it was made and maker: cast, GOG
Often you wear it: 24/7
When do you NOT wear it? I never take it off, but would if I was using really caustic chemicals or working with/putting my hands on extremely rough materials like rock or concrete. I have a much wider knuckle so it is difficult to remove.
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: none
Rings that you wear next to it: plain 1.8mm wedding band
Months / years you have been wearing it: 3 years
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when you are wearing the ring: on my Hawaii honeymoon I held my hand carefully on a hike where we had to grab volcanic rocks on either side so I didn't scratch it up

Does that mean you don't let it get in contact with any surface that can scratch it up (like other metals), or just things like rocks and concrete, hard and uneven materials?

 

[josieKat]

Does that mean you don't let it get in contact with any surface that can scratch it up (like other metals), or just things like rocks and concrete, hard and uneven materials?

I guess metal or other everyday materials feel like everyday wear and tear, and if I need to remake the ring in 10 or 15 years because of that the thought doesn't bother me. I knew I'd want to wear it all the time and not think about it whether camping, sailing, or teaching, so it is a plain setting, with the stones set relatively low, and insured just in case.

 

[evergreen]

Interesting thread!

Ring type: bezel cathedral split shank solitaire, 2.3mm shank, no pave -- x2, because I Have A Type, haha
Metal: platinum (1.3ct OEC) and 18k RG (0.92ct emerald cut)
How it was made and maker: CAD/cast, local jeweler and David Klass
Often you wear it: Every day and take off to sleep
When do you NOT wear it? There's nothing I wouldn't do with my ring on -- gardening, at work, laundry, dishes, everything.
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: The OEC, which was off round, came loose in its bezel 3x over 3 years and was repaired x2, then I concluded I needed to reset. The emerald is still in perfect shape except subtle scratch patina.
Rings that you wear next to it: platinum next to platinum, rose gold next to RG, no prongs or exposed diamond girdles in the bands
Months / years you have been wearing it: Made it about 3 years with the platinum ring, 4y and counting with the rose gold one.

 

[daisygrl]

I only wear platinum (no allergy, just preference) and all my platinum jewelry have diamonds (bracelets, rings, necklaces). I saw the post where owner of the ring had re-occuring damage done on her platinum ring within 6 months of wear. That is highly unusual since white gold is typically more prone to damage not platinum. Platinum does not "wear off", metal is not really lost, just moved (with scratches, unlike white gold). Platinum is more durable as well so I am not sure what is going on with the damages on her ring. For me, the only "wear and tear" I have experienced on all my platinum jewelry is patina on my e-ring. However, I never take showers with any of my platinum/diamond pieces, no hand work except typing, no washing hands (soap), no sleeping in it.

 

[Garry H (Cut Nut)]

Most damage to rings is done by rings on the other hand when clapping.
The worst culprits are all round diamond bands for destroying other rings.
(apart from rings that were driven over, stepped on or in a house fire).

 

[daisygrl]

Most damage to rings is done by rings on the other hand when clapping.
The worst culprits are all round diamond bands for destroying other rings.
(apart from rings that were driven over, stepped on or in a house fire).

There is a special clap for hands with rings.

 

[Karl_K]

Sweaters and other loose knit clothing probably damages more rings then anything else in climates where they are worn.
Damaged prongs and even heads ripped right off are not uncommon.

 

[Garry H (Cut Nut)]

Sweaters and other loose knit clothing probably damages more rings then anything else in climates where they are worn.
Damaged prongs and even heads ripped right off are not uncommon.

Sorry Karl, That is nonsense. If a prong was so weak as to be able to be ripped off by a warm fabric thread then it was a near dead one about to drop off anyway.

I have removed many thousands of diamonds from settings - just not that easy.
Rock climbing and brushing against a masonry wall - yes.

Also caustic products and acids are never an issue if the human flesh is still intact.

 

[Bron357]

Its easy to damage your ring / gemstone without meaning to.
Sticking your hand into a drawer, opening a door or bag can cause damage if your gemstone clips the edge of drawer or door or hits your metal car/house keys.
If you reach out to grab a railing, metal railings are the worst, your band or gemstone will make contact. Clunk.
And it’s surprisingly easy to lift a prong if it catches on something. Normally this isn’t an issue but a big stone with 4 prongs, hmmm. Catch another prong another time and …….
So wear and tear is usually marks to the metal work (especially 18ct and higher) from everyday contact with surfaces, possibly movement/ damage to prongs due to catching on clothes or hair etc and sometimes, unlucky, a flea bite out of the gemstone from an unintended impact.

 

[Garry H (Cut Nut)]

 

[tyty333]

Ring type: solitaire
Width of shank and whether there is pave: 2.3mm, no pave
Metal: 14k yellow gold
How it was made and maker: Cast; DKJ
Often you wear it: Only when I leave the house. I do not work outside the house.
When do you NOT wear it: Around the house; working out
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: None
Rings that you wear next to it: white gold 2mm band with pave (channel set with sides)
Months / years you have been wearing it: 2 years
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when you are wearing the ring: I do try
to be aware that I have rings on and to watch what I do with my hands.
Picture:

 

[MillieLou]

I did NOT wear it: doing dishes, cooking, working out, doing laundry, cleaning, vacuuming, carrying anything heavier than a 2-3 pounds (no young children), showering, no dogs so not worn holding leash,

Behavioral patterns: I noticed that when I grabbed things with my left hand, I would make sure whatever I was grabbing, if it was a hard surface, that the bottom of my ring did not come in contact with the hard surface, be it metal or rock, or even hard plastic. I curled my hand to avoid contact, such as when grabbing a car door handle or a door knob. I tried not to hit it against anything hard, even wood, aluminum, plastic, regardless of the material.

This is how I treat all my rings, with the except of plain bands. Nothing has ever been damaged, gone out of round etc. I also don't have anything pave; everything is a plain shank (WG or platinum).

 

[tyty333]

Ring type: solitaire
Width of shank and whether there is pave: 3.1mm, no pave
Metal: 14k yellow gold
How it was made and maker: Cast; JamesAllen
Often you wear it: Only when I leave the house. I do not work outside the house.
When do you NOT wear it: Around the house; working out
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: None
Rings that you wear next to it: white gold 1.5mm band solid
Months / years you have been wearing it: 6 years
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when you are wearing the ring: I do try
to be aware that I have rings on and to watch what I do with my hands.
Picture:

 

[LilAlex]

Maybe we can each share our ring type and specific usage conditions so we can get a better understanding of what regular wear and tear mean to different people. So curious to see how people wear their rings

Does it matter what other people's regular daily wear means? My mom wore an opal ring for decades -- still looks brand-new (miss you, Mom). She took it off all the time (which we try to avoid) and is the type who would never leave it somewhere by accident (whereas we are not). Spouse has a lovely Deco sapphire right-hand ring and after a decade of near-daily wear it needed a complete re-polish and prongs re-made. It was a very wearable low-profile ring that caught on nothing but did accumulate a lot of knocks as spouse is very active. She is now afraid to wear it after being chastised by the jeweler. I've tried adding a few more to her tiny collection so she can keep them "in rotation" and get some more longevity but she mostly goes without now -- unless he's with me.

Another thing that surprised me is the vulnerability of big expanses of matte-finish metal on a right-hand ring. You will start to see noticeable scratches/gouges, etc. in a matter of days. (Son and I have had this same experience.) Sadly, this is the type of ring I love. I have a wide comfort-fit wedding band and was proud of its "character" -- all the hand-over-hand rock holds we had to do while hiking in one part of the country. But on a nice bezel-set colored-stone ring, the scratches really bug me. Band can be polished but not so much on the bezel.

 

[distracts]

I think "normal wear and tear" means wearing your ring in your daily life when you haven't encountered any unusually noticeable circumstances. If I wore my ring all the time, it would encounter normal wear and tear - I just avoid as much of that as possible by NOT wearing it all the time. It's possible to do a lot of damage to a well-made ring through normal wear and tear, depending on the style the ring is. If you want to wear your ring all the time, it's important that it be suited to that. I know so many people IRL whose pave bands are out of round and/or having missing diamonds and/or have broken because they wear them all the time. It's important to remember that it's only in the last 15 years or so that people en masse began trying to wear skinny pave bands every day. If you think of your mother's or grandmother's engagement ring or wedding band that she wore all the time, it looked nothing like ones that are common today.

I did notice that a lot of the people on the other thread who said they had a skinny platinum band that hadn't deformed did not have pave bands, but solid metal.

Ring type: I have so many! Many have pave on them.
Width of shank and whether there is pave. Most of mine have pave but I usually stick to brightcut and not eternity. I do like shanks at least 3 mm in width, though not all of mine are actually that wide.
Metal: platinum
How it was made and maker: I'm answering for multiple rings so this varies!
Often you wear it: Only socially or when I go out of the house to do things that don't involve intensive hand stuff.
When do you NOT wear it? When sleeping, bathing, swimming, silversmithing, woodworking, washing dishes, carrying things, exercising, etc etc
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: One time the center stone of my engagement ring got knocked out when I accidentally bumped it on a sink faucet at a restaurant. Terrifying! It wasn't a hard knock - just a little bump that I'd never have thought about again if I hadn't looked down and seen that my sapphire was suddenly crooked in the setting and not secured. I must have hit it at just the right angle or something. It's why I'm a Big Fan of Many Prongs and always double prongs on the corners of cushions. I wasn't able to have my engagement ring changed so I'm still more paranoid about it than other rings.
Rings that you wear next to it: Always a plain band next to pave, and then whatever band I want on the other side of that.
Months / years you have been wearing it: For my engagement ring, over 10 years now. Other rings, less. But since I am a "many rings" person rather than a "one ring to rule them all" person, nothing gets worn every day. My engagement ring most but still not more than like six months out of the year.
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when you are wearing the ring: I try not to bump it into things. I'm very bad at this. Within the first month of having my engagement ring, I slammed my hand into a cast iron table while trying to move a cast iron chair. You can still see the scars on the ring. So while I TRY not to do this stuff, I think what actually happens is I'm not careful at all!

My engagement ring is three-sided pave and I went into getting it - thanks to this forum - knowing that I'd eventually have to replace the setting. I am 5-10 years away from that, I think. If I wore only my engagement ring and not others, I might already be there. I'm fine with that because my husband and I made that choice with open eyes, and also with the knowledge that tastes change and by the time that happens I may want something different. But a lot of people don't have that knowledge when they choose a pave ring and are upset when they can't wear it as often as they want without damage.

 

[ksluice]

I just want to add to this that I started out very worried about my ER because it seemed so delicate (its the ornate legacy from Tiffany—its got 5 graduated side stones on each side and tiny pave everywhere on the upper half of the ring.) Except for a few smushes of milgrain, i haven’t had a single issue. I thought I would have tons, especially since the reason we went the a branded ring was because the pave was of different level of delicacy than could be produced by similar locally crafted rings. The branded ring‘s pave just looked more refined. I thought that would mean more fragile but that certainly hasn’t been my experience.

On the other hand, the Cartier trinity I had with the white gold band paved, I couldn’t look at that ring without it throwing a stone. Even only wearing it on the most special occasions, and being super careful, 1/2 way through a third outing, missing a diamond. Reviews on the ring on PS lead us to purchase it through Neimans rather than directly with Cartier because of the difference in customer service. Neimans offered to take back the ring after the 3rd repair and have since discontinued their relationship with Cartier.

Ring type: solitaire-ish
Width of shank and whether there is pave. 1.5mm, loads of pave, type may vary, i think its ”bead set”
Metal: platinum
How it was made and maker: tiffany
Often you wear it: as often as I can (whenever I’ve managed to get out of my yoga clothes)
When do you NOT wear it? On days when being a mom means i haven’t managed to shower
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: sizing beads in the first year, a full clean and check, refurbishing of milgrain damage
Rings that you wear next to it: none
Months / years you have been wearing it: almost 11
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when you are wearing the ring: nothing in particular, i tend to remove it when i wash my hands or if I’m doing something messy if its safe to do so (like i can put it in a pocket, or i am at home)

 

[LLJsmom]

Does it matter what other people's regular daily wear means? My mom wore an opal ring for decades -- still looks brand-new (miss you, Mom). She took it off all the time (which we try to avoid) and is the type who would never leave it somewhere by accident (whereas we are not). Spouse has a lovely Deco sapphire right-hand ring and after a decade of near-daily wear it needed a complete re-polish and prongs re-made. It was a very wearable low-profile ring that caught on nothing but did accumulate a lot of knocks as spouse is very active. She is now afraid to wear it after being chastised by the jeweler. I've tried adding a few more to her tiny collection so she can keep them "in rotation" and get some more longevity but she mostly goes without now -- unless he's with me.

Another thing that surprised me is the vulnerability of big expanses of matte-finish metal on a right-hand ring. You will start to see noticeable scratches/gouges, etc. in a matter of days. (Son and I have had this same experience.) Sadly, this is the type of ring I love. I have a wide comfort-fit wedding band and was proud of its "character" -- all the hand-over-hand rock holds we had to do while hiking in one part of the country. But on a nice bezel-set colored-stone ring, the scratches really bug me. Band can be polished but not so much on the bezel.

Thanks for sharing. I’m glad you asked. I wondered if we got enough responses we could look for patterns, if certain things that happens to certain types of rings, etc. But as I think about it more, a more concrete way to study the responses would be to create a spreadsheet with the data and see what comes out. Hmmm…. Maybe I’ll start.

 

[Rockdiamond]

Did you ever notice a bruise someplace on your body and not remember how it got there?
It happens to me.
So, when a client tells me that somehow their ring got bent even though they only wear it to church on Sunday, I assume they hit their hand against something without realizing.
Unless there’s som black magic involved, a ring can’t bend itself.
In my experience people take more impacts to their hands than any other part of their body.
My 02cents

 

[Ibrakeforpossums]

Its easy to damage your ring / gemstone without meaning to.
Sticking your hand into a drawer, opening a door or bag can cause damage if your gemstone clips the edge of drawer or door or hits your metal car/house keys.
If you reach out to grab a railing, metal railings are the worst, your band or gemstone will make contact. Clunk.
And it’s surprisingly easy to lift a prong if it catches on something. Normally this isn’t an issue but a big stone with 4 prongs, hmmm. Catch another prong another time and …….
So wear and tear is usually marks to the metal work (especially 18ct and higher) from everyday contact with surfaces, possibly movement/ damage to prongs due to catching on clothes or hair etc and sometimes, unlucky, a flea bite out of the gemstone from an unintended impact.

I think I have what you describe. My 4 stone anniversary ring has a chipped stone, right on its very thin girdle. It's right where I would whack it on something.
Guess I'll be contacting Jewelers Mutual. I hope they can match the other stones, they're RBs but not very new, and not transitional either.

 

[Garry H (Cut Nut)]

More on the concert damage - I took some good photos and used it for staff training:

 

[Slickk]

More on the concert damage - I took some good photos and used it for staff training:

Sheesh! Those rings look a mess. Must have been some amazing concert!!! Thanks for sharing!

 

[kgizo]

I posted in the other thread that I have a friend with a solid plat shank that goes out of round every 6-12mo. She has had it fixed by multiple jewelers that say there is nothing wrong with the ring. She is not hard on her jewelry. She has arthritis in her fingers and I wonder if she does more gripping / handling things with her palm area and thus the shank gets more “wear” even though she isn’t doing anything strenuous while wearing the ring.

 

[Austina]

Normal wear and tear to me is wearing my rings out, but taking them off and putting them in their boxes when I get home. I don’t do anything in the house with my rings on, and certainly wouldn’t wear them to do cleaning, cooking or gardening. Both my rings are platinum, one with a really thick shank and the other Bella, has a -2mm shank.

 

[guzirenek]

Ring type: solitaire on plain shank
Width of shank and whether there is pave: 2.5mm tapering to 2mm, no pave
Metal: 14k white gold
How it was made and maker: cast, family owned jeweler
Often you wear it: 24/7
When do you NOT wear it? I never take it off except to sleep and handle weights when working out.
Any changes/damage and repairs that have been required: none
Rings that you wear next to it: plain 2.5mm white gold 14k wedding band
Months / years you have been wearing it: Almost 2 years
Any behavioral patterns that are specific to you when wearing the ring: I always subconsciously twist my rings and fidget with them, and am clumsy so am constantly banging them accidentally on things.

 

[Garry H (Cut Nut)]

Concert Damage - these rings were worn an different hands. Client said she never did anything bad with them:

 

[RMOO]

More on the concert damage - I took some good photos and used it for staff training:

I don't mean to threadjack, but you say it WAS a 3.5ct diamond. I'm curious what did this concert cost her in carat weight when the diamond was (I assume) repaired?

 

[Modified Brilliant]

Regarding new rings...it's important to start off owning a "new" ring without having potential future headaches. I see on a weekly basis, round brilliant cut diamonds set incorrectly in a 4 or 6 prong head. I can easily slip a piece of thin paper underneath the prong. Poor workmanship or incorrect setting, in some cases, contributes to the loss of a diamond or a pulled prong. My biggest pet peeve is a prong that does not touch the diamond!

 

[Garry H (Cut Nut)]

I don't mean to threadjack, but you say it WAS a 3.5ct diamond. I'm curious what did this concert cost her in carat weight when the diamond was (I assume) repaired?

Firstly, I never saw her again - they were not insured and she didn't like what I told her, even though you can see, and I showed her, the dings in the claws.

Secondly, it lost a few points in that and other chips.
Thirdly, there is possibly a 3ct hiding inside