What kind of gem shopper are you?

[Cerulean]

I’ve been toying with this a lot as I’ve forayed into the world of colored gemstones. I’ve been wanting to buy a sapphire - my FIRST sapphire - something pretty to have and hold during a tumultuous time. I have a fear of losing out (I’ve lost a lot during this time) - and worry that if I don’t get something now, it will never happen because something may come up. At the same time, I want something I really love, and wear and admire daily. I worry that with my budget now, I may end up making concessions.

I’ve been thinking about the ways I could approach it and feel there are two paths to take. Reluctantly wait, and save for a Dream stone. Or take the money I have in my hot little hand, satisfy desire NOW and get something pretty, of course, but possibly with concessions but I’m sure enjoy. How could I hate a sapphire adorning my hands, where there used to be none? Size, color or cut...you can’t have it all if there’s a limit to what you can spend.

So PSers - what kind of shopper are you? Did you start out as an instant gratifier, and after feeling like you’ve made mediocre purchases and switch? Are you an instant gratifier but love having lots of options to wear?

Did you start out more conservatively and watch ones slip away only to regret it? Or did you painstakingly save for THE ONE. Has the wisdom of experience changed anything? Tell me your stories!

 

[missy]

I’m a mix of both. I’ll save for the “one” but I’ll get smaller purchases along the way to hold me.

I saw my dream OEC 2 years before I got her. Long story. But it was worth it.

 

[Niffler75]

@annagene12 Oh gosh this got me thinking. I think initially I was a 'super excited instant gratifier'.
I have too much now in my collection. So what I am doing is selling some to free up collateral for some single bigger projects.
I have now become more educated and a bit more discerning when gemstone shopping. But I guess it's a learning curve!

 

[shelovesinclusions]

My first few purchases were like- I am going to save for this thing that will meet my exact requirements (unheated, eye clean, exact color, over a certain size). I love the first ones I got. My first "big" purchase was an almost 2ct Sri Lankan purple sapphire which is unheated and eye clean, has a good cut, but is more saturated than I now know I prefer.

I had a couple of experiences. First, I went to a local gem show and got a couple of spinel for much less than I expected (one was not eye clean, and one was smaller than I'd normally consider). Second, I purchased a jade bangle for about 1/8 of what I was used to paying to see if the size would be a better fit for me- and realized it was of a much higher quality than I had been getting at a higher price point.

After that, I sort of realized that gem pricing can be (to an extent) quite subjective. It's made me more of a hunter for gems that I like than a save-for-ideal type person. Sometimes I'll get one that's a good price just so I can see what that looks like (I really like my big BE ruby, but never would have considered something like that early on). If I get it in my head that I need an x,y,z - I will save for it, but I'm happy with the variety I have. Thankfully, I've learned what looks good on my skin too because it would have sucked to save up for a pad early on and then realize it just kinda blends into my own pinky-nude fingers. And, no one IRL is going to be like, "oh, your garnet is bright orange, but it's not Fanta orange" or "I see an inclusion in your sapphire." I do wish I'd started out making compromises, and then started saving for pieces once I knew what I was willing to compromise on than the other way around.

Realistically, most colored stone people end up getting more than one in the long run. Make your collection what you want it to be! If you want to start with a list-meeting sapphire, do it (but I'd suggest waiting until you can see different ones in person first so you make a more informed choice).

 

[demantoidz]

After making a few small cheap purchases early on and regretting it (luckily only a few hundred dollars in until I realized), I started waiting for 'the ones' only.

 

[Cerulean]

My first few purchases were like- I am going to save for this thing that will meet my exact requirements (unheated, eye clean, exact color, over a certain size). I love the first ones I got. My first "big" purchase was an almost 2ct Sri Lankan purple sapphire which is unheated and eye clean, has a good cut, but is more saturated than I now know I prefer.

I had a couple of experiences. First, I went to a local gem show and got a couple of spinel for much less than I expected (one was not eye clean, and one was smaller than I'd normally consider). Second, I purchased a jade bangle for about 1/8 of what I was used to paying to see if the size would be a better fit for me- and realized it was of a much higher quality than I had been getting at a higher price point.

After that, I sort of realized that gem pricing can be (to an extent) quite subjective. It's made me more of a hunter for gems that I like than a save-for-ideal type person. Sometimes I'll get one that's a good price just so I can see what that looks like (I really like my big BE ruby, but never would have considered something like that early on). If I get it in my head that I need an x,y,z - I will save for it, but I'm happy with the variety I have. Thankfully, I've learned what looks good on my skin too because it would have sucked to save up for a pad early on and then realize it just kinda blends into my own pinky-nude fingers. And, no one IRL is going to be like, "oh, your garnet is bright orange, but it's not Fanta orange" or "I see an inclusion in your sapphire." I do wish I'd started out making compromises, and then started saving for pieces once I knew what I was willing to compromise on than the other way around.

Realistically, most colored stone people end up getting more than one in the long run. Make your collection what you want it to be! If you want to start with a list-meeting sapphire, do it (but I'd suggest waiting until you can see different ones in person first so you make a more informed choice).

This was very helpful - I wish I had a chance to see more in person - I'd love to go a gem show - but obviously probably not happening this year!

Agree RE what is flattering - I have my heart set on a teal stone (and it sounds stupid) - but I painted my nails the exact teal color I am picturing in my head, and to my horror, it makes my pink-y hands look comically pink. It's going to be hard to know without seeing stones - so really need to focus on vendors that are communicative with good return policies!

I am hoping with experience, I become able to discern the "diamonds in the rough" so to speak - I have little sense for what is really high quality, although can definitely see if something looks dull and dark.

Thanks again for sharing your story!

 

[Cerulean]

I’m a mix of both. I’ll save for the “one” but I’ll get smaller purchases along the way to hold me.

I saw my dream OEC 2 years before I got her. Long story. But it was worth it. ❤

Oh boy oh boy I can see that it was worth the wait! I've seen your knockout gracing threads - absolutely delightful to see pictures of!

 

[ItsMainelyYou]

I really want a great sapphire someday- someday- being the operative word. My eyes are bigger than my wallet.
My favorite is 'relative' bargain hunting. I can't really afford any top shelf of the big three...It's almost impossible to find good quality CS for nothing unless you have access to the source, but you can make out really well in comparison with patience. I've also learned to let go of what is perfect and find what is perfect for me within a budget I can live with.
I'm also a lover of slightly off colors/hues which spinel has lots of examples of so my dollar stretches farther. There are some killer teal spinels out there in your budget if you're willing to look. They are not sapphires, but they're close.

 

[Cerulean]

I really want a great sapphire someday- someday- being the operative word. My eyes are bigger than my wallet.
My favorite is 'relative' bargain hunting. I can't really afford any top shelf of the big three...It's almost impossible to find good quality CS for nothing unless you have access to the source, but you can make out really well in comparison with patience. I've also learned to let go of what is perfect and find what is perfect for me within a budget I can live with.
I'm also a lover of slightly off colors/hues which spinel has lots of examples of so my dollar stretches farther. There are some killer teal spinels out there in your budget if you're willing to look. They are not sapphires, but they're close.

interesting RE spinels - to be honest, I am very hard on my hands - clumsy, whacky, klutzy...could go on... it's why I like bezels and think I basically need sapphires or diamonds for daily wear (which is what I am looking for) I've damaged softer stones, like a garnet ring, cracked a turquoise, moonstone - etc. which is honestly why sapphires feel like the best option and they have a great color range but boy my wallet might hurt for it so something's gotta give

 

[ItsMainelyYou]

interesting RE spinels - to be honest, I am very hard on my hands - clumsy, whacky, klutzy...could go on... it's why I like bezels and think I basically need sapphires or diamonds for daily wear (which is what I am looking for) I've damaged softer stones, like a garnet ring, cracked a turquoise, moonstone - etc. which is honestly why sapphires feel like the best option and they have a great color range but boy my wallet might hurt for it so something's gotta give

I completely understand.
I too am just a hand whacker, table lip puncher, a gesticulator.
Spinels aren't quite as hard, but they're pretty hard and rated for daily wear. The stones you had mishaps with are all on the softer side. I won't even gamble with those myself
I've had good luck with mine and I'm a wear it and forget to ever take it off kind of gal.
My avatar is one of my reds newly set...and knowing the setting is on the delicate side I will have to take more care than I would normally. That'll be new- but I knew that going in. I usually have heavier more protective styles to my rings. I'm going to reset a big blue spinel I have into a bezel style so I can wear her everyday. Once I do, I won't worry about it.
* also, spinels aren't cheap but unless the spinel is either (over 2-3cts)very large or a very coveted color in the event of a tragedy you can replace it with less pain than the umpty thousands the big three will set you back. The only downside is spinels are rarer/less availability and you have to hunt more for them.

 

[qubitasaurus]

I think there is little point waiting for the one. You're idea of what the one is will change anyway, and also when you actually start looking you'll be forced to make a compromise anyway (this is more or less always true unless money really isnt an issue, and you are willing to pay top $$ too). CS are not cookie cutter perfect items, usually once you lay down a long list of criteria like it has to be this colour, tone and saturation, this shape, under this price, have no surface reaching inclusions, no cutting issues like bowties, windows, half and half extinction. Dont want too many inclusions etc. By this stage you're very unlikely to find anything not matter how long you wait. You're default position should be you're finding something where the compromises you made dont bother you so much.

Having said that you should ideally wait until you've seen quite a few sapphires in person. You should also be able to glance at a stone and decide whether it has any of the above issues -- otherwise you cant begin to evaluate what compromises you made. Or ask others here to come up with suggestions as they'll do the vetting for you -- realistically it'd take 6 months probably to be able to spot all of this, even more time to work out what I left off the above list that is still importan, and then a few experimental purchases to learn which points you'll compromise on. I guess this is why many of us have multiple stones, and often buy more expensive ones later on. Not right at the start.

Teal sapphires are usually Montana sapphires or Nigerian. The former shirt dramatically, they dont look teal in all lighting. In some lighting they can look grey. The latter can be a little dark. But I'll leave a picture of one here.

 

[arkieb1]

If you can damage a garnet, you can damage a sapphire, I've split a diamond in half, being another person that manages to smack my hands on everything.... if you smack the wrong stone the right way, you can ruin just about anything....

I buy what I like and then usually just keep upgrading until I'm relatively happy....

 

[Cerulean]

If you can damage a garnet, you can damage a sapphire, I've split a diamond in half, being another person that manages to smack my hands on everything.... if you smack the wrong stone the right way, you can ruin just about anything....

I buy what I like and then usually just keep upgrading until I'm relatively happy....

Split a diamond?? Oi vey!

The garnet was an old piece my mom got at a market in India - always wondered if it was a bit fragile and was quite worn down after years of wear but I did chip it !

Trying to be much more careful with my diamond e-ring than I have ever been with jewelry! But it took about 5 days with delicate claw prongs to realize I needed a bezel and a bit more prudence for sure!!!!

 

[strawrose]

I had a few instant gratification purchases. They were fun to wear, even though not perfect. Then, I found my dream stone and it’s much better than all my stones. I think I’ll take a definite break until the next one.

 

[Cerulean]

I think there is little point waiting for the one. You're idea of what the one is will change anyway, and also when you actually start looking you'll be forced to make a compromise anyway (this is more or less always true unless money really isnt an issue, and you are willing to pay top $$ too). CS are not cookie cutter perfect items, usually once you lay down a long list of criteria like it has to be this colour, tone and saturation, this shape, under this price, have no surface reaching inclusions, no cutting issues like bowties, windows, half and half extinction. Dont want too many inclusions etc. By this stage you're very unlikely to find anything not matter how long you wait. You're default position should be you're finding something where the compromises you made dont bother you so much.

Having said that you should ideally wait until you've seen quite a few sapphires in person. You should also be able to glance at a stone and decide whether it has any of the above issues -- otherwise you cant begin to evaluate what compromises you made. Or ask others here to come up with suggestions as they'll do the vetting for you -- realistically it'd take 6 months probably to be able to spot all of this, even more time to work out what I left off the above list that is still importan, and then a few experimental purchases to learn which points you'll compromise on. I guess this is why many of us have multiple stones, and often buy more expensive ones later on. Not right at the start.

Teal sapphires are usually Montana sapphires or Nigerian. The former shirt dramatically, they dont look teal in all lighting. In some lighting they can look grey. The latter can be a little dark. But I'll leave a picture of one here.

That sapphire example is stunningly beautiful, as is the setting!

Thanks for sharing your thoughts - as I research, I am learning what I will / won't compromise on for CS...there are a lot of factors to consider, it seems many more than for diamonds!

I agree fully that in an ideal world, I would have a chance to see plenty of stones at an event. The likelihood of getting to go to a gem show or something like it and seeing gems in person is quite low for this year IMO, and it is important for me to get a stone this year for my own reasons. But I am only looking at vendors where I can easily return if need be.

I have bought and worn small pieces / less expensive stones (nothing like a custom project) - aquamarine, peridot, tourmaline, garnet, opals - etc., low stakes... just things I have picked up at estate sales or on trips. Nothing more than a couple hundred and mostly under $100. The sapphire is my first "big" purchase and it is a sentimental one at that. Which is why there is a certain amount of pressure. I was mostly curious about how other PSers have built up collections over time!

Everyone on PS has been so helpful and reading through threads and learning about what to spot has been really helpful too - hopefully I can slowly buy a few stones over time and accrue a collection!

 

[Cerulean]

I had a few instant gratification purchases. They were fun to wear, even though not perfect. Then, I found my dream stone and it’s much better than all my stones. I think I’ll take a definite break until the next one.

Would love to see your dream stone!!!

 

[strawrose]

Would love to see your dream stone!!!

I don’t have the motivation to post officially. Here’s a preview of the paraiba tourmaline

 

[Cerulean]

I don’t have the motivation to post officially. Here’s a preview of the paraiba tourmaline

Wow that COLOR is like a tropical lagoon! How beautiful....I could dive right into it! Thanks for indulging me with a preview

 

[Lilith112]

I'm a very slow shopper who's been described as an over-thinker lol. I usually start with doing preliminary research into colors & prices before I decide on a rough budget/size/color. Afterwards, I try to see a few of my target gems in person without the intent of buying; this usually lets me further refine my specifications. Moreover, I usually come up with a rough setting idea, albeit this can change quite a bit during the searching process. After seeing a bunch in person, I usually coordinate with a few vendors and will wait until the right one comes alone; I don't have issues rejecting for any number of reasons since it's very important to me that I'll love my purchase for the rest of my life lol.

 

[MissyBeaucoup]

I once met a man who ran an aquarium store. He said he had taken about 100 fish home instead of selling them, “And I’ll have you know, every one of those fish is special.”

My goal was to have a rainbow of colors. I’m lucky that I enjoy garnets and tourmalines as well as sapphires and spinels. I enjoy interesting inclusions and colors that are in between the benchmarks. I really appreciate good cutting and that is where I don’t like to compromise.

This is a great place to learn. Within your budget, I hope you get bitten by the bug!

 

[Bron357]

I love the search, whether it’s for me or someone else. I like trying to find the “hens teeth” or the “unicorn”. I enjoy a challenge.
I also love learning, understanding and appreciating gems.
Different people place different emphasis on qualities.
Some prefer the most perfect gem and are happy with a wee size, others want size, the bigger the better.
Some want unheated, untreated, others don’t care one way or the other.
Some people will spend $20,000 on a 1 carat ruby whereas others think thats insane and happy with a $50 pretty lab gem.

 

[Acinom]

I’ve only bought stones that I found beautiful enough to set. Sometimes big, beautiful and glamorous (my blue green tourmaline by Precision Gem), or stunning, yet more common (my two blue topazes by Doug Menadue). Sometimes I had quite a search and found an ideal glowy Paraiba that is gorgeous yet included, or my blue sapphire with its strong colour.

What I love about colored stones is that it is a product of nature and that it does not have to be perfect. I have thus set non expensive stones in expensive settings. For me it’s about the total package.

 

[dk168]

I have impulse-bought a number of inexpensive learner/starter stones in the past, however, I have also paid in installments for larger ticket stones.

Lately, it is more about quality than quantity, except for lab created CSs as they are a lot more affordable.

DK

 

[Cerulean]

I’ve only bought stones that I found beautiful enough to set. Sometimes big, beautiful and glamorous (my blue green tourmaline by Precision Gem), or stunning, yet more common (my two blue topazes by Doug Menadue). Sometimes I had quite a search and found an ideal glowy Paraiba that is gorgeous yet included, or my blue sapphire with its strong colour.

What I love about colored stones is that it is a product of nature and that it does not have to be perfect. I have thus set non expensive stones in expensive settings. For me it’s about the total package.

I have seen your incredible collection on some threads already - and I also love that it seems like you commit to setting the ones you buy!!! I hope to do the same, which may mean I have a very small collection to start....I totally agree with you about the "product of nature" - it is what is so special about them! And btw - that sapphire and the paraiba (i love the inclusions actually - makes it glow) - OMG!

 

[Cerulean]

I once met a man who ran an aquarium store. He said he had taken about 100 fish home instead of selling them, “And I’ll have you know, every one of those fish is special.”

My goal was to have a rainbow of colors. I’m lucky that I enjoy garnets and tourmalines as well as sapphires and spinels. I enjoy interesting inclusions and colors that are in between the benchmarks. I really appreciate good cutting and that is where I don’t like to compromise.

This is a great place to learn. Within your budget, I hope you get bitten by the bug!

What a great story! Sounds like a sweet man. I used to work at an animal shelter -- I was so tempted to do the same thing but it is a bit different with larger animals than fish I loved them all!

I love your rainbow - learning that I too care mostly about cut and like some of the "funkier" stones that have a bit more character like strange colors or inclusions. I didn't feel so strongly about cutting for my diamond e-ring but find that boy it really changes the game for a CS - my diamond performs just fine for my taste and have seen some with very superior cuts that almost look fake to me. not to insult anyone...just what comes to my mind.

but a precision cut colored stone? wowza - they just jump out at me, far and away. so funny how different qualities matter for different things.

 

[Cerulean]

I'm a very slow shopper who's been described as an over-thinker lol. I usually start with doing preliminary research into colors & prices before I decide on a rough budget/size/color. Afterwards, I try to see a few of my target gems in person without the intent of buying; this usually lets me further refine my specifications. Moreover, I usually come up with a rough setting idea, albeit this can change quite a bit during the searching process. After seeing a bunch in person, I usually coordinate with a few vendors and will wait until the right one comes alone; I don't have issues rejecting for any number of reasons since it's very important to me that I'll love my purchase for the rest of my life lol.

I love this - no point in buying something that doesn't make your heart sing! i feel the same way. ive also looked at settings along my search to imagine the end product - it's hard to look at a stone and just know on its own

 

[Jadeite_101]

I’m definitely an instant gratifier. If I see something I like and don’t get it right away I’ll have trouble sleeping. Hence this quarantine lockdown has given me sleepless nights wherein I have to admire gems from afar or E-gems. Needless to say I started out the same and with my uneducated doe eyed buys would buy pretty mediocre stuff in the beginning. However years into it I realized that “buy less, study more” attitude as a collector will guide you thru it. I may still be an instant gratifier but I definitely buy better gems and jewelry than what I started out buying. In that saying I chose a pretty niche, complicated and complex field to collect that is Jade Jadeite and other traditional Imperial colored stones in antiquity China. It’s most especially true in that field to read up not only on your CS quality and collection guides but on history books as well.

 

[AV_]

You may well meet a sapphire that is worth having & can be yours now. Striking blue is rare enough that any size is worth having. I would same the same for perfect star in any strong color. And with other colors who knows what prices are.

 

[voce]

I'm an opportunistic buyer. If I see something for a good price pre-loved that I know I'll use, then I hit buy. If I see gems from a trusted vendor that I know I won't be able to pass to others, I hit buy, such as for a suite of 4 cobalt spinels I bought recently from Yvonne. Other stuff that's not rare and I expect I'll be able to find at another time or for a better price eventually, I pass. However, I do like to have extra melee gems around to play with in deciding how I'll set a center gem.

I find I'm not one for simple solitaires; I appreciate having at least two colors, whether the sidestones are diamond or other colored stones. My fiance and jewelers agree that sometimes my designs I sketch for custom projects can turn out to be quite elaborate, though they are sometimes more simple.

The everyday stuff, I'll take my pick and wait for the perfect one or the perfect price point. The special rare stuff, I either pass on if I don't care for it, or buy with a payment arrangement if it's what I love.

 

[GliderPoss]

After making a few small cheap purchases early on and regretting it (luckily only a few hundred dollars in until I realized), I started waiting for 'the ones' only.

Yeah this is me. Started my journey with some cheap Ebay stones etc but now I'm super fussy and will literally spend weeks, if not months searching for perfect stone within my budget. As many vendors are international, if I have the slightest doubt I won't get it coz shipping is expensive & risky.