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WORRIED -LEFT ENGAGEMENT RING WITH JEWELER

L

lola_relli

Rough_Rock
Joined
Feb 9, 2013
Messages
11
Two days ago, I went to a local jeweler recommended by a very close friend. My friend says she and her family have used this jeweler for years, so I felt I could trust them. Also, the company has been around for over 25 years.

My fiancé purchased a gorgeous halo micropave engagement ring for me from Blue Nile. I thought I wanted to have my wedding band custom made to "fit" around the protrusion made by the halo engagement ring. This is why we went to the local jeweler.

I walked in, and the guy at the counter glanced at my ring, asked what I would like, and then proceeded to take us across the hall to an actual jewelry designer in a separate store. We left my ring with the designer for about 15 minutes. The designer then called us back over to him to view a "sketch" of a matching ring. This was done on a 3in x 5in scrap piece of paper. The jeweler salesman then crunched numbers, gave us a price estimate, and we accepted. He then said I would have to LEAVE MY ENGAGEMENT RING with them for "awhile" (maybe 2-3 weeks), while they made a wax mold of the matching band. NO PAPERWORK INVOLVED (very, very dumb on my part).

That same afternoon, the jeweler called to say a wax mold was not possible, and I would just have to trust they are doing the right thing. I panicked, and called my friend who recommended them. She is swearing up and down that they are ok. She then calls them, and has the office manager call me back. The manager states, "We understand your frustration and concern, and although no paperwork is involved, this is normal protocol. We take for granted that we are trusted, and assume everyone feels the same. I promise your ring is ok, and everything will be ok". Embarrassed at the time, I backed down and agreed.

Now two days later, I am not only wanting to change my mind on the style of ring (I now want a regular band without a notch made to fit the engagement ring), I am in absolute panic over leaving my engagement ring. With no receipt, how can I prove they did not switch the stone, if I happen to question it? Can I take our original paperwork of the ring and have it appraised elsewhere? Can they switch my original request to make a regular band? Should they be able to return my engagement ring since I know just want a simple matching band without a form to fit my engagement ring? How stupid am I for leaving my ring? I literally did not sleep last night because of this. They are closed on Saturdays and Sundays (which is today and tomorrow), so I have to now wait until Monday! PLEASE HELP!
 
Dont panic. Your friend swears they are reputable and it is rare for a jeweler at a reputable store to switch a stone. It simply isn't worth it. However, since you have misgivings (and understandably so) I would go to the store first thing Monday AM and pick your ring up and do some research (PSers can help you here) to find the right setting and benchperson/jeweler to make your WB. You must have a report from BN-GIA or AGS and if you are uncertain about if the stone was switched (which I am sure it was not) you can always verify against the report. Hang in there-it'll be OK. And don't beat yourself up anymore. What's done is done and you can make it right.
 
Missy - I can't thank you enough for the reply. I think I am extra paranoid because of my home being robbed 6 months ago - everything was stolen except for my ring (because I was wearing it), and I vowed to never be without it again. This is why I think I am over-thinking everything.

I appreciate your advice and your time in replying. I will definitely be retrieving my ring on Monday, and I am going to shop around at other local jewelers first before making a final decision. I do have a card with the identifying statistics for my ring - I may have it inspected after I pick it up, just for peace of mind.

I am learning a lot and still have a lot to learn! I will post my progress as it happens. THANK YOU, AGAIN!
 
lola_relli|1360414340|3375982 said:
Missy - I can't thank you enough for the reply. I think I am extra paranoid because of my home being robbed 6 months ago - everything was stolen except for my ring (because I was wearing it), and I vowed to never be without it again. This is why I think I am over-thinking everything.

I appreciate your advice and your time in replying. I will definitely be retrieving my ring on Monday, and I am going to shop around at other local jewelers first before making a final decision. I do have a card with the identifying statistics for my ring - I may have it inspected after I pick it up, just for peace of mind.

I am learning a lot and still have a lot to learn! I will post my progress as it happens. THANK YOU, AGAIN!
Click to expand...

Aww, you are very welcome!! I am so sorry about your home being robbed. :(( That is a terribly traumatic event and it is totally understandable how you are concerned about this situation. Big hugs-it will be OK! And please come here when you need assistance re your WB setting. PSers can get you the best quality at the best prices!
 
:bigsmile: Starting to feel better! Thanks, again!
 
lola_relli,

I don't think you are being paranoid at all. I don't care how reputable and trustworthy a jeweler is, I think you should have a receipt describing what you left with them. I wouldn't be worried about them switching stones or doing anything shady, but things do happen and stuff gets misplaced. You need a receipt.

liz
 
Thank you, Liz. I agree with you (in hindsight), and hopefully I won't have any problems when I call and ask for them to return my ring ASAP. Thank you so much for the reply.
 
I second Missy's good advice. Within certain limits of how they present themselves to the client, this really is pretty much how it's done. There usually really is a wax involved but often the wax model isn't really recognizable because of all the metal work that needs to be done after it's cast and they may have decided it's better not to show it to you first. Again, this isn't very good presentation but the process is basicaly reasonable. It's the same with the receipt. You should definitely get one, and it's a poor business practice that they didn't have it as part of the take-in procedures in the first place, but I'm not sure it's evidence of a theft, just sloppy procedures.

As mentioned, the risk of a jeweler stealing your diamond is quite low, far lower than people think it is. It's also worth pointing out that IF this were to occur it would be a covered loss under most insurance policies. If you don't have insurance, considering getting a policy. They're not very expensive and it'll help you sleep at night.

The fat that you changed your mind about what you want is an important concern. They probably haven't started on the job yet and you want to stop the process before they do. At this point it should be no problem to change the design but soon it will be.
 
If you don't want to disrupt your relationship with that jeweller going forward (there are plenty of anniversaries to come, yanno lol) why not simply check in with them on Monday, ask to see the ring and then ask for a receipt?

You could consider taking the ring to an appraiser afterwards, to ensure the diamond is still the same, if you are genuinely concerned...although if the jeweller is well established locally the business would lose everything and so is unlikely to be indulging in such a crime...

But in any case if you take the ring from them now, and want a wedder that fits specifically to that ring going forward, you are still in the position of having to choose a jewellery and trust them. Do you have another jeweller in mind? Do you feel comfortable mailing off your e-ring? Or will you just buy 'off the shelf'?
 
i think you've gotten good advice but wanted to add one more point. i would be much less concerned about a reputable jeweler switching out your stone. rather, it is possible that stones can be damaged during the setting process and if you and the jeweler don't have a definite "accounting" of what you dropped off and the condition it was in, it can become a process of "he said, she said" in trying to determine how the damage was caused.

in any event, when you finally drop off your stone to have it set, make sure that any damage is clearly noted on the receipt (or that it states there is none). then, before you walk out of the store with your finished ring, examine it closely to make sure the stone is still in perfect condition. if you walk out of the store, it may be hard to prove that a stone was damaged during setting.

good luck.
 
I have nothing more to add other than support for the panic you are going thru and please try not to worry. I can fully appreciate what is rambling thru your head at this point, and ultimately, if you are having some 'niggling' feeling in your gut, sometimes it can be best to listen to it. Not casting disparaging remarks upon this jeweller or any other one who operates that way, just saying that sometimes --- listening to that voice within, can really be the right thing to do.

I would call them on Monday, go in, talk with them, see your ring, inspect it to the best of YOUR abilities (you may remember there always was this one XXXX in the shank/corner of the diamond/blah blah blah) and then get a receipt if you feel comfortable pursuing it with them. Otherwise, walk away. Yes there are other anniversaries and events in your future, but when that time comes, you can start from scratch with that new item.

I also had a bad local B&M experience and I wish I had listened to my gut way back when at the start of the process but I didn't, so I can appreciate what is going on in your mind right now.

DUST that it all goes perfectly for you! (but it is ok to walk away from something if you don't feel right about it...)
 
I'm in agreement with the majority that the jeweler and designer are reputable, just not up to standards on take in procedures.

It's hard to believe that in this age of computers and digital photography that a business could function smoothly without good record keeping. But it IS possible and it does occur. I know a few small independent local jewelers who are trustworthy and wonderful but still use hand written receipts. So not to worry but follow up on Monday.
 
I would also go and pick up your ring on Monday, and just nicely say that you are having second thoughts about the style of band you want. I think you are definitely making a better decision to use a regular band and not a notched one. But we can recommend proven ring makers rather than one you know nothing about their quality of work. I would never have custom work done unless I had seen a lot of fine examples of their work and knew what to look for. Here, we get to see it all the time. You can post pictures of your ring and we can show you examples of well made rings to go with it.
 
Having being robbed is awful and glad that u had your e ring on you. I know that feeling. I was robbed and all my jewellery was taken. So I now vowed to wear them ALL the time. I understand your concern and it is a valid one.

There is nothing more that i can add than what others have stated.

I will give an example of what i have to do with my jeweller. I have my asscher diamond ring with this jeweler whom i have known for a few years. I am planning to have a wedder or eternity or both ( :Up_to_something: ) with the same jeweler. A few discussions had occurred and they have said that I would have to leave the ring with them so that the can match it perfectly. Granted i have worked with the jeweler before and I trust them. But because of the design of the current ring - comfort fit, semi tension, and the thickness and height of it, the diamond ring would need to be present so that the ring that we are going to make would fit nicely against it.

This jeweler is also on the east coast of AUS, and I am on the west coast. I have to post it with the appropriate insurance. Another level of worry, but the processes are very distinct to limit loss in transit.

I hope that this helps you in understanding how my jeweler works with matching a ring. This may be different to how other vendors work.

Alternatively, as others have suggested: you can have a plain band instead of a notched/ fitted band against the halo e ring that you have and, get a spacer as well. There are many PSer on here that have done that. This also makes it easier for you. As you don't have to part with your e ring, again.

Good luck... And hope this weekend passes quickly for you. Hugs and PS dust to you!!
 
lola_relli|1360407807|3375946 said:
Two days ago, I went to a local jeweler recommended by a very close friend. My friend says she and her family have used this jeweler for years, so I felt I could trust them. Also, the company has been around for over 25 years.

My fiancé purchased a gorgeous halo micropave engagement ring for me from Blue Nile. I thought I wanted to have my wedding band custom made to "fit" around the protrusion made by the halo engagement ring. This is why we went to the local jeweler.

I walked in, and the guy at the counter glanced at my ring, asked what I would like, and then proceeded to take us across the hall to an actual jewelry designer in a separate store. We left my ring with the designer for about 15 minutes. The designer then called us back over to him to view a "sketch" of a matching ring. This was done on a 3in x 5in scrap piece of paper. The jeweler salesman then crunched numbers, gave us a price estimate, and we accepted. He then said I would have to LEAVE MY ENGAGEMENT RING with them for "awhile" (maybe 2-3 weeks), while they made a wax mold of the matching band. NO PAPERWORK INVOLVED (very, very dumb on my part).

That same afternoon, the jeweler called to say a wax mold was not possible, and I would just have to trust they are doing the right thing. I panicked, and called my friend who recommended them. She is swearing up and down that they are ok. She then calls them, and has the office manager call me back. The manager states, "We understand your frustration and concern, and although no paperwork is involved, this is normal protocol. We take for granted that we are trusted, and assume everyone feels the same. I promise your ring is ok, and everything will be ok". Embarrassed at the time, I backed down and agreed.

Now two days later, I am not only wanting to change my mind on the style of ring (I now want a regular band without a notch made to fit the engagement ring), I am in absolute panic over leaving my engagement ring. With no receipt, how can I prove they did not switch the stone, if I happen to question it? Can I take our original paperwork of the ring and have it appraised elsewhere? Can they switch my original request to make a regular band? Should they be able to return my engagement ring since I know just want a simple matching band without a form to fit my engagement ring? How stupid am I for leaving my ring? I literally did not sleep last night because of this. They are closed on Saturdays and Sundays (which is today and tomorrow), so I have to now wait until Monday! PLEASE HELP!
Click to expand...

I have to chuckle only because how do you expect them to make you a custom wedding band if they don't have the ring?!? And jewelers are supposed to look at your ring, it's their job. The only thing I would demand is a receipt. Why they didn't give you anything to show that they have your ring and are doing a custom order (which should require paperwork), I don't know, but I'm with everyone else. Call them or go back in on Monday. If they still need the ring, don't flip out! I've waited over 4 weeks for my custom things! This isn't a robbery or anything. You'll be fine.
 
I agree with the other posters, but want to stress that you really should have an insurance policy on your ring. It will protect you not only against lost or theft but also against damage. It will also give you piece of mind. :))
 
Christina...|1360449736|3376338 said:
I agree with the other posters, but want to stress that you really should have an insurance policy on your ring. It will protect you not only against lost or theft but also against damage. It will also give you piece of mind. :))
Click to expand...

Oh, yes, the best piece of advice of all! :appl:
 
Wow - I am so grateful for all of the words of advice and for everyone's time in replying. THANK YOU! I've never seen a site like this where everyone is so kind and helpful. Very much appreciated and pleasantly surprised.

I understand now how ridiculous I am in "expecting a custom band without having to leave the ring to match it". I just am very new to this - have never owned such a cost-expensive piece of jewelry, and I've only had it for 1.5 years. All other jewelry I lost in our home theft was mostly family heirloom or costume pieces I purchased for myself. I am very attached to this engagement ring because of the sentimental and cost value that comes with it. The "shock" I had when I realized I had left it without obtaining a receipt was mostly due to how appalled I was at myself for not obtaining the receipt!!!

Either way, I am now so grateful for this learning process and plan to have more common sense with these situations in the future.

I contacted the jeweler today (although I knew they wouldn't be there). To my surprise, they have the business phone line "roll over" to their cell numbers after hours. I had left a detailed voice message explaining, "I am realizing that I was a bit quick and careless with my decision to have a custom band made to fit around my engagement ring. I am re-thinking, and would like to pick up my ring first thing on Monday, so I may explore all styles and fits of bands before making a final decision". Within a couple of hours, they phoned back stating they would call me back on Monday because they are out of office today. When I asked if I can please have the ring back on Monday, he replied, "Don't worry, honey. We'll get the ring back to you as soon as we can". I'm hoping that means they will hand it back on Monday without issue.

I plan to visit a couple of other jewelers to see options of already made bands, as well as post a picture of my ring on this site. I am realizing that most of my anxiety may have been due to having a custom made band to fit around the ring, without first seeing more options. I just jumped into it too quickly.

AGAIN - thank you so much to everyone. You have all been so helpful. "Receipt, receipt, receipt", and, "explore every option before deciding, are the lessons of the day.
 
Oh, and yes - my fiance obtained an insurance policy on this ring immediately. He received it, had it appraised, and called the insurance company all in the same day!
 
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