Are we too elitist & doing 99% of newbies a disservice?

[Garry H (Cut Nut)]

My advice depends on the person and their preferences. If I sense they want the best and/or can afford it, I'll recommend nothing less. If carat and value are more important, I'll relax my recommendations.

Great but how do you make those assesments?
it is hard enough in a face to face situation!

 

[elizat]

Great but how do you make those assesments?
it is hard enough in a face to face situation!

Also, what is the best? D color and internally flawless? How do you measure what is best for someone else?

 

[MRBXXXFVVS1]

Great but how do you make those assesments?
it is hard enough in a face to face situation!

Based on the information they share on what they are looking for, the questions they ask, asking follow-up questions, etc.

 

[Polabowla]

I would like to offer a slightly different perspective, especially because you helped me so much when I first joined PS to solve a problem with my ring. I commissioned a bespoke diamond ring from my wonderful jeweler, and he promised to find me the best diamond in my price range. He sent me a video of the diamond, a super ideal cut, and I loved it. When I picked it up, I thought it looked beautiful in the store. But when I got home, I was disappointed. It looked too perfect, almost fake, and it went dark in direct sunlight. I was going to return it, but decided to search online to learn more about super ideal cuts. Thanks to @Garry H (Cut Nut) and the PS team, I learned that I have a top notch diamond, which makes me very happy. Personally, I just don't like super ideal cuts (as much as I thought I would). But I feel good about my purchase, and I didn't undo all my jeweler's hard work.

I did not read the entire thread, but doesn't this prove the point? You didn't really like your diamond's performance until you learned the stats were amazing. But why go by stats if you don't like the look?

Yes I'm often saddened by posters who bash buyers that want specifically brand xyz & buy it and get bashed for not taking the advice to go elsewhere.


And no frankly, I don't think most ppl need super ideal cuts, and I could never buy anything below vs2.
People really vary.

I once asked about my original ring & wow I got some very harsh posts from people who made very nasty hasty & wrong judgments.

So yes I think 1000x before I post anything here.

 

[EllenS1]

I joined PS in 2018 but am still relatively new! It has been and continues to be so inspirational seeing all the wonderful jewelry shared by all the lovely women here! Unique, unconventional and one of a kind pieces that you see all at once in a single platform! As a newcomer I was initially hesitant to share my modest collection or perhaps pieces which were so simple compared to some others but I soon got over that feeling as everyone was so welcoming, non judgemental and appreciative of the fact that when we share our jewelry what we are doing essentially is sharing parts of our personalities, stories from significant moments in our lives....our jewelry speaks for us and that I find is what’s most special about PS

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

I joined PS in 2018 but am still relatively new! It has been and continues to be so inspirational seeing all the wonderful jewelry shared by all the lovely women here! Unique, unconventional and one of a kind pieces that you see all at once in a single platform! As a newcomer I was initially hesitant to share my modest collection or perhaps pieces which were so simple compared to some others but I soon got over that feeling as everyone was so welcoming, non judgemental and appreciative of the fact that when we share our jewelry what we are doing essentially is sharing parts of our personalities, stories from significant moments in our lives....our jewelry speaks for us and that I find is what’s most special about PS

From a personal perspective i echo your thoughts 100%
And im still a bit of a newbie too
(I have 2 modest inherited ER's and jewlery from the mall)
Im really looking forward to one day buying a MM diamond or coloured stones with the forums help
I think i will benefit by not being brand spanking new when that time comes

 

[seaurchin]

I think it's hard to say with much accuracy that "we" do anything one way or another since people come and go and all bring their own attitudes and opinions.

But one thing I notice is what I'd just consider the learning curve of someone coming in where there's a higher level of knowledge about a topic, in this case, gems and jewelry. It can be uncomfortable as they learn that what they may have thought was high quality is not and so on. But if they ask for people's opinions, that's what they will get.

 

[Diamond Girl 21]

Great but how do you make those assesments?
it is hard enough in a face to face situation!

Maybe there should be a questionnaire on the forum for visitors/newbies. I'm not a tech type person, so I don't know how this would work. For example, something along the lines of "Is having a precision cut diamond important to you?" Or "I just want the biggest diamond for my budget." I'm just throwing out an undeveloped thought here.

When I was first shopping for diamonds, I was so frustrated by salespeople who pushed bigger stones, when my priorities were different. I wanted the best color, cut, and clarity within my budget. The one size fits all philosophy just doesn't work, that's why I've been reluctantly to make specific stone recommendations here.

 

[mommylawyer]

I did not read the entire thread, but doesn't this prove the point? You didn't really like your diamond's performance until you learned the stats were amazing. But why go by stats if you don't like the look?

Yes I'm often saddened by posters who bash buyers that want specifically brand xyz & buy it and get bashed for not taking the advice to go elsewhere.


And no frankly, I don't think most ppl need super ideal cuts, and I could never buy anything below vs2.
People really vary.

I once asked about my original ring & wow I got some very harsh posts from people who made very nasty hasty & wrong judgments.

So yes I think 1000x before I post anything here.

I agree with you completely. I encountered exactly what you're describing while adventuring on PS yesterday. It's very disappointing. I was an oil and gas litigator in Texas when I was 26. I was always the youngest person in the room, and I was usually the only woman. I found that entire experience to be less harrowing than some of the threads on PS.

Thank you for taking the time to reply to my post. I appreciate you sincerity. Regarding my decision to keep my ideal cut diamond--I have several engagement rings. I'm creating a collection of different cuts/colors. The cut didn't need to be my favorite, but it needed to be a good representation of its category. That's what I was trying to determine.

 

[Polabowla]

I agree with you completely. I encountered exactly what you're describing while adventuring on PS yesterday. It's very disappointing. I was an oil and gas litigator in Texas when I was 26. I was always the youngest person in the room, and I was usually the only woman. I found that entire experience to be less harrowing than some of the threads on PS.

Thank you for taking the time to reply to my post. I appreciate you sincerity. Regarding my decision to keep my ideal cut diamond--I have several engagement rings. I'm creating a collection of different cuts/colors. The cut didn't need to be my favorite, but it needed to be a good representation of its category. That's what I was trying to determine.

Ah I understand now, and I'm glad that you got a really good one then!

Sad the threads were rough , no one should have to go thru that.

 

[mommylawyer]

Ah I understand now, and I'm glad that you got a really good one then!

Sad the threads were rough , no one should have to go thru that.

Thanks. I am undeterred and still happy to be here. Many of the threads were older, BTW. And I must admit that some of the strongly critical information can be useful to someone who is still exploring their options.