Buffet vs. Sit-down vs. Cocktail Reception? What would you sacrifice ...

[areagirlsbestfriend]

Thanks for the additional food for thought about venues that won''t at least work with you .. I think that will definitely be a selling point. We''re visiting another venue this week and have heard through friends that are using it that they are very willing to work with the couple based on how much you''d like to spend per person. So I''m keeping my fingers crossed!

Bee* .. here in the States, "open bar" usually means 4 or 5 hours (one hour for cockatil hour and then whatever is left for the reception). Oh my goodness, I can''t even imagine offering drinks from 4 pm to 2 am!!! Hehe you ARE in Ireland though .. y''all know how to party

 

[bee*]

Date: 11/5/2007 10:55:57 AM
Author: areagirlsbestfriend


Bee* .. here in the States, ''open bar'' usually means 4 or 5 hours (one hour for cockatil hour and then whatever is left for the reception). Oh my goodness, I can''t even imagine offering drinks from 4 pm to 2 am!!! Hehe you ARE in Ireland though .. y''all know how to party

Yep, I''d say that''s definitely why we don''t have an open bar-you would literally need to take out another mortgage

I''ll keep my fingers crossed for you for the new venue!

 

[HollyS]

We had a buffet of hot and cold appetizers, and two carving stations of beef and turkey, with some great condiments. Also, wedding cake and chocolate groom''s cake. Coffee, iced tea, water, punch and champagne (we brought) for the toast. This was a 4pm reception between mealtimes. It was perfect -- everyone loved it -- definitely enough to eat. I heard nothing but complimentary comments from everyone; and we could see that people were enjoying the food and going back for seconds. And the cakes - fabulous!

Open bar would not even have been an option for us. Too expensive, and we were not a big society wedding anyway. It is entirely possible to have a lovely event that everyone enjoys without breaking the bank. We had a few guests who often rub shoulders with VERY IMPORTANT people in places like D.C., and they told us it was one of the nicest weddings that they had ever been invited to. Someone told us our wedding was "classy but comfortable". We take that as the highest of praise.

 

[Pandora II]

Date: 11/5/2007 10:55:57 AM
Author: areagirlsbestfriend
Thanks for the additional food for thought about venues that won''t at least work with you .. I think that will definitely be a selling point. We''re visiting another venue this week and have heard through friends that are using it that they are very willing to work with the couple based on how much you''d like to spend per person. So I''m keeping my fingers crossed!

Bee* .. here in the States, ''open bar'' usually means 4 or 5 hours (one hour for cockatil hour and then whatever is left for the reception). Oh my goodness, I can''t even imagine offering drinks from 4 pm to 2 am!!! Hehe you ARE in Ireland though .. y''all know how to party

I have a similar situation to you Bee. My wedding is from 3.30pm till midnight, hence the wine and soft drinks only bar.

My lot don''t drink much, but I dated a guy from Ireland for 7 years - you can''t have an open bar there unless you win the lottery!

 

[pennquaker09]

I think you have to do what is best for you. When you say dream venue, I assume you mean the look and ambiance and what not? I would possibly look at another place, especially if they won't budge on price? I ended up with my caterer because it seemed like EVERYWHERE I looked Jeffrey Miller was either the exclusive caterer or on the list of preferred caterers. So, I didn't really have a lot of choice.

How many guests will you be servicing and are they primarily coming from somewhere else? The clear majority of any wedding, is the food costs. I don't mean to be nosey, but how much do you have budgeted? And more importantly, what kind of family/guests do you have coming? Someone mentioned discounts for out of season dates. You can definitely save money this way. One of the venues that I liked gave discounts for November ceremonies, and the one that I actually choose did not. In my case, it was actually more expensive to have a buffet instead of a plated dinner. The cheapest option for my caterer was $90.00 and the one we chose was over $100.00 and we still had to buy all of the liquor. And I didn't really have a choice, with the type of people we have coming, I couldn't have them pay for liquor, not that I would do that. Etiquette wise, I could not do that. I think that's why everyone is saying its tacky. You're not really supposed to ask people to pay at the wedding. Unless they don't RSVP!


I echo the statements about breaking the bank. My dad is going to flip. I'm waiting for the call any day now.

 

[areagirlsbestfriend]

Guest list is at no more than 150 (that''s invites only - obviously not factoring in those who will RSVP "no"- 20%?). I have about 15K budgeted (but of course spending less would be even better) ... I would like to spend about 60 a person. I''ve said before, I will not have a cash bar (unless I have beer and wine as "open"). I understand that people are taking time of out their lives and schedules and probably spending quite a bit of money to get there/bringing a gift. I would say most guests are an average of an hour away. Obviously some closer, others farther. I''m open to cutting corners in every way possible ... flowers, centerpieces, invites, etc. The most important thing to me is probably the venue and how it looks, setting, etc. .. food is a close second. Music follows closely behind that. I''m very much about candles and plan on buying many, many candles for the ceremony and reception. I know I can do that fairly cheaply through online vendors.

I guess it will ultimately come down to WHAT I''m getting for my $. If I can get heavy (but delicious) h''or deourves, cake, alcohol for 60/person or less at a gorgeous venue, I will do that. On the flip side, I went to a wedding recently that was about 60ish a head .. buffet, decent venue ... but not quiiiiteeeee worth the 60 (IMO). The food was just so-so and the locale wasn''t really anything to brag about but it got the job done.

I''ve heard rumors about the place I''m looking at this week --- it''s a gorgeous place, the food is supposedly great, and they really work with you (i.e. you tell them how much you want to spend per person and they set up a package for you). I''m not getting my hopes up completely, but we''ll see!!!!

Thanks for the input ladiesssss