Co-worker Copied my Wedding Set!!!

[Harleigh]

Just had to share with you all after my little experience today...

As some of you may remember from an earlier thread soon after I got engaged, there is a gal at my work that saw my new e-ring when school started back up and she apparently liked it immensely (and while supposedly joking when she grabbed my hand to look at it, loudly called me a B*TCH in front of several of the staff for having a bigger stone than her) and it turns out her dad is good friends with the jewelry store owner and his dad where my rings came from. She has asked me numerous times about my e-ring, has seen both the wedding bands that go on either side and has also seen pix of all 3 rings together. She has also tried the e-ring on, much to my dismay. She has even gone so far as to say that she wants a setting "kinda" like mine to set her perfect stone off a bit more and because she no longer likes yellow gold. To that I of course say, "Great idea, HOW do you plan to have it set?" Blah, blah, blah... You know me, always willing to talk about jewelry, and I'm always up for new ideas!!! And here I thought I was being helpful!!

Long story short, I heard last week she got it re-set by the same jeweler I got my diamond set at and of course couldn't wait to see it, then wondered why she hadn't come to show it off to me yet as she's one of those IN YOUR FACE kind of gals, if you know what I mean. This morning I ran into her before school started and found it odd she tried to dodge me...she always has SOMETHING to say, so you usually can't get away! I stopped her and said "Hey, I heard you had had you ring re-set" and of course asked to see it. Imagine my surprise when what I saw on her hand was MY EXACT SETTING AND WEDDING RINGS!!! They were all soldered together and ready to go...I was stunned, to say the least. Her e-ring's band is a bit thinner than mine and her bands look to be about the size of the 1/4 carat ones they had, but other than being a bit smaller, it is exactly the SAME tings as my set!!! I almost fell over and tried not to choke over my words of, "YOU.GOT.MY.RINGS!"

She tried to look embarassed and joked about having an "in" with the owner to get what she wanted, ha ha, and you know he can look up anything she wants (I took that to mean she had him look up my order!) and I think I very nearly reached out and smacked her! (BAD, Harleigh, BAD!!!)

Somehow I held my composure and of course asked if I could see it (I figured, what the hell, she's already tried MINE on herself after practically ripping it off my finger, so all's fair, right?!?) and I put it right up next to mine.

Since I'm amongst friends here on PS, can I admit that I thought (read: hoped) mine would look better than hers? To her credit, her stone is flawless (an heirloom from her grandmother) and of excellent cut and quality. It is well over a carat, and stunning in and of itself...I have always appreciated her diamond and agreed it was wasted in the setting she had it in. However, because her diamond wasn't much larger than the band she had it set on, it didn't make the diamond stand out like she had claimed she wanted...the two extra bands kind of took away from the center stone, and it was set lower because the stone was smaller, which she said she was still irritated about. While it was on my finger next to my e-ring, she noticed how long and thin my fingers were and that it didn't take up my whole finger like it does hers. I asked her about how comfortable it is and she admitted she can't bend that finger anymore...I got a wee little bit of joy out of that, I admit.

I know I should feel flattered that she liked the look of my ring SO very much, but here I've barely had my ring 2 1/2 months and she went out and COPIED exactly what I had had done at the exact same jeweler! I also know it shouldn't matter, but I kinda liked that no one else around me had anything like what I had chosen except for my mom's set of my grandma's that I was trying to duplicate in the first place, and I had asked my mom if she minded before I chose something so similar to the one she wears daily. She even went with me to pick this set out and loved it on me, and since she has diamonds that put my big 'ol honker to shame, she didn't mind at all!

She also knows I've coveted my grandma's rings she wears for years, so she took that into account, also.

To be honest, I would really like to be happy for this gal about her new bling, but I have to admit I'm a bit offended that she would copy it so exactly. I guess I would never copy someone else's ring that I would see every single day, at least without talking to that person about it! I guess I should have seen the writing on the wall 2 months ago...now that I think about it, she had asked me to email her the pix of all three of my rings together, so she could have even taken the jeweler/friend a picture of my set as well as have him look it up...arghhh!

Just when I'd almost forgotten about her rings after the day I had, to top it all off, she sat diagonally to the right in front of me for an hour and a half meeting after school and made sure her hand was up at the side of her face or holding the ever-lasting lollipop she was sucking on the entire time, and I couldn't help but laugh! My teaching partner from last year saw it and said, "Hey, isn't hers just like YOUR set? What'd she do, copy it?" You should all be very proud of me that I refrained from being petty and just said, "I guess we both have similar rings now" and left it at that. She said that she had heard this gal say she wanted a ring just like mine several times but she couldn't believe she actually went and copied it! I'm like, WHAT??? Aaghhhh! Also being the good friend she is, my partner kindly said she thought my set was prettier...what a gem of a friend she is, because she knows how proud I am of my beautiful ring! I said thank you very much and then I kept my big mouth shut and just shook my head when she asked if it bothered me. I figure this other gal will change her mind again in a few years and demand her husband pay for another re-set, so I just have to wait it out until she tries to out-do someone else...

Sorry for the long vent...did anyone make it all the way through??? I can't tell anyone but my jewelry-loving mom about something like this, so I figured I'd better get it out of my system here rather than to any of my co-workers at school!

If you made it this far, thanks so much for reading...I feel better now and I'm pretty sure I can make it through another day without strangling the girl...I hope! (Maybe she'll actually refrain from sticking in my face for the next few days, eh?)

Have a great night everyone!

 

[OUpearlgirl]

UGH.. I''m sorry! Some people..

 

[monarch64]

Aw, Harleigh, don''t let her or this ring-copying thing get the best of you... I''ve always found it very sad and desperate when people can''t come up with original and meaningful ideas on their own, to me it means it''s more important to them to keep up with other people and model themselves after them or their possessions, and in the long run she''ll never be happy being "herself," rather, this is just part of some sort of inferiority complex she has. Too bad it had to be your rings she fell in love with, but you''re right, there is no higher form of flattery than imitation. Keep in mind that your ring probably has more meaning and sentiment involved (with or without her heirloom flawless center stone, hers was not a labor of love but sort of a selfish work of gratification if you will), and the feelings surrounding YOUR ring she''ll never have. It''s the symbolism and feeling she can never duplicate and when it comes down to it, does it REALLY matter in the grand scheme of things whether she has "your" rings? Probably not. I''d be willing to bet that she can''t choose a car or a handbag or pair of expensive shoes or a home without trying to figure out in her mind who has the best and then copying those things as well.

You have every right to be pissed off about this internally, but good job not showing that you''re upset about it at work. More than likely, your other co-workers are baffled as well and probably thinking to themselves or talking amongst themselves saying that she''s a total copycat and her behavior is ridiculous. (And I use the term "ridiculous" loosely, I have a few less diplomatic words that I won''t post here, lol!) Let her walk around the office and make a total a$$ of herself, I don''t imagine people you work with will think very highly of her now. Blech. I feel for you, I really do.

We have ex-friends who sort of did the same thing to us as far as neighborhood/home buying, major appliances, cars, etc. It''s very annoying and I can''t even imagine what it would have been like if we had gotten engaged and married before they did. I''m quite sure at this point that my rings, my dress, even our venue would''ve been duplicated if the timing had been in reverse.

 

[VRBeauty]

That is unbelievable -- and I have to say you're being very magnanumous in how you've responded. I'm not sure I would have found it in me to be so generous, at least not so soon. I'm glad that you haven't let your co-worker's actions change how you feel about YOUR ring.

I guess when a customer comes in with a request a jeweler's job is to fill it, but... I'm surprised that your jeweler would be willing to make an exact copy of your set for another customer, especially when you bought yours so recently.

ETA: Where can I see some pictures of your rings? I'm intrigued by the link to your mother's ring!

 

[Mara]

eh she sounds like a winner but she won't be around you forever...so i'd just take it as the highest form of flattery and leave it at that. she's not even worth the time you spent writing out that entire post.

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 1:06:53 AM
Author: OUpeargirl
UGH.. I''m sorry! Some people..

Thanks, OUpeargirl! I agree...some people...yechhh!

 

[musey]

Date: 10/4/2007 12:53:16 AM
Author:Harleigh

did anyone make it all the way through???

I did, I did!!

Okay, I have to SERIOUSLY COMMEND YOU for not giving that yatch a piece of your mind

I know JUST how you feel (well, not just--no one has copied my ring and I hope they never do). I very, VERY much dislike being "copied." At least your other coworker recognizes that you were the one who "originated" the set around those parts. I get much, much more annoyed when someone else gets compliments for something they copied off of me... so I hope that that never happens for your situation.


But, you know, remember that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

(That''s a crock of you-know-what, if you ask me.)

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 1:43:03 AM
Author: monarch64
Aw, Harleigh, don't let her or this ring-copying thing get the best of you... I've always found it very sad and desperate when people can't come up with original and meaningful ideas on their own, to me it means it's more important to them to keep up with other people and model themselves after them or their possessions, and in the long run she'll never be happy being 'herself,' rather, this is just part of some sort of inferiority complex she has. Too bad it had to be your rings she fell in love with, but you're right, there is no higher form of flattery than imitation. Keep in mind that your ring probably has more meaning and sentiment involved (with or without her heirloom flawless center stone, hers was not a labor of love but sort of a selfish work of gratification if you will), and the feelings surrounding YOUR ring she'll never have. It's the symbolism and feeling she can never duplicate and when it comes down to it, does it REALLY matter in the grand scheme of things whether she has 'your' rings? Probably not. I'd be willing to bet that she can't choose a car or a handbag or pair of expensive shoes or a home without trying to figure out in her mind who has the best and then copying those things as well.

You have every right to be pissed off about this internally, but good job not showing that you're upset about it at work. More than likely, your other co-workers are baffled as well and probably thinking to themselves or talking amongst themselves saying that she's a total copycat and her behavior is ridiculous. (And I use the term 'ridiculous' loosely, I have a few less diplomatic words that I won't post here, lol!) Let her walk around the office and make a total a$$ of herself, I don't imagine people you work with will think very highly of her now. Blech. I feel for you, I really do.

We have ex-friends who sort of did the same thing to us as far as neighborhood/home buying, major appliances, cars, etc. It's very annoying and I can't even imagine what it would have been like if we had gotten engaged and married before they did. I'm quite sure at this point that my rings, my dress, even our venue would've been duplicated if the timing had been in reverse.

Hi monnie,

Thanks so much for taking the time to chime in...you are always so wise and kind. I really am trying to be the bigger person in this situation and not let it get to me...that's definitely why I came here. I don't ever want to come off as whiny or selfish, especially in my workplace, and since I haven't done so before, I certainly don't plan to start now!

I really think you hit the nail on the head...she has the "Keeping up with the Joneses" syndrome and can't think for herself...in fact, she just HAD to know where I got my skirt today, too...I'm like, "ROSS, where else?"

What can I say, I'm frugal!

I'm banking on the fact that she won't be happy with her new set for long once mine is all put together...since hers is not bigger and better, she will badger her poor husband until he gets her something she "thinks" will outdo everyone else and make her "happy"...I really feel for that guy...she is like a steamroller!

Sadly, she and your ex-neighbors remind me a lot of my mom...she has that competitive gene in her, too...thank goodness I escaped it! She's always comparing what her friends have with what they have, and she's always got to outdo them. I must say I'm really proud of my mom for understanding my desire to make my own set to look like Grandma's...now that I think about it, that may be the first time she's ever not thrown a fit about something like that!

Thanks again, monnie...your thoughts are always appreciated!

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 1:44:24 AM
Author: MINIMS
That is unbelievable -- and I have to say you''re being very magnanumous in how you''ve responded. I''m not sure I would have found it in me to be so generous, at least not so soon. I''m glad that you haven''t let your co-worker''s actions change how you feel about YOUR ring.

I guess when a customer comes in with a request a jeweler''s job is to fill it, but... I''m surprised that your jeweler would be willing to make an exact copy of your set for another customer, especially when you bought yours so recently.

ETA: Where can I see some pictures of your rings? I''m intrigued by the link to your mother''s ring!

Thank you MINIMS!

I don''t feel very magnanamous (sp?)...I am usually fairly outspoken, so it was complete restraint on my part today, let me tell ya!

As for the jeweler who actually made both sets, they are family friends...so, she had her ring re-set and back on her hand in less than 3 days. My special order took over 4 weeks if I remember correctly, so, either he is a miracle worker when a family friend comes a-calling, or she had ordered everything quite some time ago and then he got it made right quick when it all came in! I dunno!

As for pictures of my rings, I have a few threads floating around, but I think the one with the most pix is https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/pix-of-my-birthday-engagement-ring.65684/ Since these photos were taken, my e-ring has been back to the jeweler 4 times, so I have been trying to take more pix since I got the head straightened, lowered and the prongs shaved down a ton! I''ll try to add more pix again, otherwise I''ll have to contact Andrey to post them.

I don''t have any pictures of my mom''s set, but hers is almost identical to mine in yellow gold, with a 4mm band that was her first wedding band with about a .75 gorgeous European cut diamond from my grandfather from WWII, a 2 mm channel set diamond band from my great-grandmother and another 2mm channel set diamond band she got from who knows where?

It''s absolutely gorgeous...I''m still hoping it will come to me one day as my grandma wished.

Thanks again...I appreciate your support!

 

[monarch64]

Harleigh, thanks for using the words "wise" and "kind" to describe my posts, lol! I don''t know about "wise," but I do try to be kind! (The golden rule, blah blah blah.

) Anyway, I wanted to say that hey, at least you know you''re a trend-setter now...I remember growing up that my parents always encouraged me to do my own thing and not worry about what others were doing. Your mom was different in that respect but it sounds like you figured out on your own how to be yourself and that is wonderful. There''s nothing like being able to be confident in your own decisions and not having to constantly compare yourself to others, I would think that would be kind of a tough life to lead, since heaven knows there will always be something bigger and better than what we have ourselves, ya know?

I hope you''re feeling better about the situation after "talking it out" here. The clothing questiong thing...nothing is wrong with asking where someone got their skirt but this gal has made a very annoying habit of monkey-see, monkey-do with you and next time she asks you ANYTHING about your personal belongings I would start making s*it up. Seriously...tell her you got it from Goodwill for $.50 and that the label was cut out when you bought it. If you really must have some "revenge" that is only known to you, that''s the most fun way to do it. You''ll drive her INSANE.

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 1:47:44 AM
Author: Mara
eh she sounds like a winner but she won''t be around you forever...so i''d just take it as the highest form of flattery and leave it at that. she''s not even worth the time you spent writing out that entire post.

LOL Mara! You always make me laugh, and can I just tell you how much better I felt after I got that entire post out of my system??? It has truly been festering since 7:30 this morning, and getting all of that out on here will help me to keep my big trap shut at work tomorrow when I see her again!

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 2:14:26 AM
Author: monarch64
Harleigh, thanks for using the words ''wise'' and ''kind'' to describe my posts, lol! I don''t know about ''wise,'' but I do try to be kind! (The golden rule, blah blah blah.

) Anyway, I wanted to say that hey, at least you know you''re a trend-setter now...I remember growing up that my parents always encouraged me to do my own thing and not worry about what others were doing. Your mom was different in that respect but it sounds like you figured out on your own how to be yourself and that is wonderful. There''s nothing like being able to be confident in your own decisions and not having to constantly compare yourself to others, I would think that would be kind of a tough life to lead, since heaven knows there will always be something bigger and better than what we have ourselves, ya know?

I hope you''re feeling better about the situation after ''talking it out'' here. The clothing questiong thing...nothing is wrong with asking where someone got their skirt but this gal has made a very annoying habit of monkey-see, monkey-do with you and next time she asks you ANYTHING about your personal belongings I would start making s*it up. Seriously...tell her you got it from Goodwill for $.50 and that the label was cut out when you bought it. If you really must have some ''revenge'' that is only known to you, that''s the most fun way to do it. You''ll drive her INSANE.

OMG!!! I''m rolling on the floor laughing out loug right now! If you only knew that I really DO shop at discount and thrift stores ALL the time and admit it to anyone and everyone! It drives people nuts when they ask me where I got something and how much I spent on it! They all know of my ebay prowess, so it''s never a big surprise when I spout off how little I paid for something, but it irritates them nonetheless!

I have always been flattered when people ask me where I got something...half the staff at my school does their bargain shopping through me and I love it...for clothes, purses, etc, of course! Maybe I should go to the complete opposite end of the spectrum with this gal and start telling her I get everything she asks me about at Nordstrom or Macy''s or some other high end store I really can''t afford...she won''t ever have anything the same AND she''ll go broke in the process trying to match everything!

As for the other, I don''t know how I escaped my mother''s tendencies...she was adopted by much older parents and spoiled rotten, so my father the enabler says that''s her excuse! Also, my older brother was always the star child and caused no angst or turmoil, so I grew up always fending for myself because I never fit the mold my mother wanted me to...I''d like to think that made me a better, stronger person, but that doesn''t mean I don''t feel things like this deep inside, even if I don''t let others see it! (Again, that''s why I felt comfortable coming here!)

And I do feel better, thank you! I was a little afraid some here would say, oh, get over it, but where jewelry of this ilk is concerned, I thought a few might actually understand how I''m feeling and have a little compassion, and I''m a bit relieved that others don''t think I''m nuts for feeling the way I do. And I will get over it, and as long as I never let anyone at work know how much it bothers me that she did that, I''ll be okay with getting it out of my system on here...thanks for letting me do just that!

 

[monarch64]

Oh, I had to log back in (just on my way to bed finally after the cubbies disappointing defeat tonight!) to respond to your latest post. I completely forgot that you were the .99 ebay wedding gown queen, LOL! So I guess my last post was pretty appropriate! Yeah, I agree totally that your mission now is to really F with her mind as far as clothing, handbags, shoes, etc....if I were you it would give me the utmost satisfaction to see her trying to hunt down your vintage dress or whatever at the local Saks or Neimans, hee hee. I know that''s probably overkill or putting way too much effort into someone who totally isn''t worth it but again if I were you it would be supremely satisfying. Ohhhh, I can be evil as well as wise and kind, LOL! Good luck, keep me/us posted from time to time when she gets after you about what you''re wearing/doing/etc.

Ok, it is waaaay past my bedtime and I''m just feeling protective of you and wanting to inflict a little coldhearted pain on her. Hee hee hee.

 

[simplysplendid]

It is annoying but I must agree imitation is the highest form of flattery! You''ve got good taste and she agrees!

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 1:54:51 AM
Author: musey

Date: 10/4/2007 12:53:16 AM
Author:Harleigh

did anyone make it all the way through???

I did, I did!!

Okay, I have to SERIOUSLY COMMEND YOU for not giving that yatch a piece of your mind

I know JUST how you feel (well, not just--no one has copied my ring and I hope they never do). I very, VERY much dislike being ''copied.'' At least your other coworker recognizes that you were the one who ''originated'' the set around those parts. I get much, much more annoyed when someone else gets compliments for something they copied off of me... so I hope that that never happens for your situation.


But, you know, remember that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery

(That''s a crock of you-know-what, if you ask me.)

Thanks for hanging in there through all that, musey! You are just too damn cute!

And I''m so glad you understand my thoughts...I guess I have always been of the mindset that THAT''S something you just don''t do! I know that we covet other people''s gorgeous rings here on PS and get tons of great ideas. I also know that many of us do have almost the same or very similar rings here, but we all live (at least what seems like) many worlds apart, and with the appreciation we have here, it truly is a form of flattery to me...but it''s NOT when I have to see the same ring on that "yatch" (loved that word, HAD to throw it in here somewhere!) at work several times a day...ugh!!! I really disliked her before, then immensely after her "B*TCH comment in August, but have somehow managed to always be cordial to her...now I''m going to aim for cool indifference, which is not at all my personality, but I don''t know what else to do anymore! Argghhhh!

Musey, thanks again...you made me feel a lot better!

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 2:40:29 AM
Author: monarch64
Oh, I had to log back in (just on my way to bed finally after the cubbies disappointing defeat tonight!) to respond to your latest post. I completely forgot that you were the .99 ebay wedding gown queen, LOL! So I guess my last post was pretty appropriate! Yeah, I agree totally that your mission now is to really F with her mind as far as clothing, handbags, shoes, etc....if I were you it would give me the utmost satisfaction to see her trying to hunt down your vintage dress or whatever at the local Saks or Neimans, hee hee. I know that''s probably overkill or putting way too much effort into someone who totally isn''t worth it but again if I were you it would be supremely satisfying. Ohhhh, I can be evil as well as wise and kind, LOL! Good luck, keep me/us posted from time to time when she gets after you about what you''re wearing/doing/etc.

Ok, it is waaaay past my bedtime and I''m just feeling protective of you and wanting to inflict a little coldhearted pain on her. Hee hee hee.

Hee hee hee, monnie! I love it! I appreciate your protectiveness...I am going to have to stop being so nice and start making stuff up! One gal has the same purse as me in another color, another the same sandals, another the same walking shorts...I could go on and on, but honestly, up until now I''ve LOVED sharing all my bargains with my friends and co-workers. This ring thing just hit me the wrong way, I guess. Thanks again for being there for me...you''re the best! Mwaaahhhh! Now go to bed already!!!

I''ll let you know how it goes tomorrow now that my partner noticed what she had done...it could get interesting, but through it all I''m determined to be the bigger person...ughhhh! Nighty night!

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 2:41:04 AM
Author: simplysplendid
It is annoying but I must agree imitation is the highest form of flattery! You''ve got good taste and she agrees!

Thanks, simplysplendid!

I keep trying to remind myself of that along with "MUST KEEP MOUTH SHUT ABOUT WHERE I GET THINGS!!!"

I have a big mouth...

 

[door knob solitaire]

Oh Twinkie...I am so sorry. Hugs. Pat Pat...let it out...there there....now Blow your nose...pat pat... Fell better now?

I am so proud of you for not tackling her and pulling her by the hair to the nearest fountain and plunging her do in the water until she looked like a road kill. That is of course what I would have done.

I know it gets old...and I know it doesn''t help you right now...but as others have said...Blah Blah Blah imitation is the sincerest form of flattery! Oh, yeah...you just wait until it happens to you!!! As it has been said the poor little urchin has no direction and is grasping at things she thinks will make her complete. What everyone else has. In this case...the beauty you have created. It is evident in the sucker routine. That was well planned and pathetic. LOOKIE AT ME!! If there existed any grace...class...that ring would have stayed flipped in or on her lap out of view. It is apparent she is tauting you. Return the serve with kindness and go on as nothing has happened.

You continue onward...you display the Grace she lacks...she is going to again be envious of...but that is something she can''t have or copy. She has no grace deposits to withdrawal from.

It seems to me she wants to see you flip. Keep you head up...and bite your lip when you really want to pull her hair out. Get to the place of feeling sorry for her. You will find your compassion will prevail and nothing will remain but that.

DKS

If you have a minute...here is a PS...

back in HS Mr. DKS drove the coolest most envied car. One guy peeled out and did circles in a gravel parking lot to spray MR. DKS''s car with gravel-because he wanted that car so bad-he couldn''t stand it. I know I know what does this have to do with your ring...(I just happened to reference roadkill in the first paragraph)....so as I was saying... To this day, Mr. DKS has no idea how a poor little skunk was killed in his path as he drove home...but he is ever so grateful. He has the greatest respect for animal life and felt the need to share the loss with gravel boy. He left the dearly departed in the front seat of the gravel boys car-rolled up the windows to lock in the freshness. It is reported that the car was totaled. It was not possible to get within 10 feet of it.

Moral to this story...if the Grace thing doesn''t pan out...and you need roadkill work...you just say the word!!
Restoration is just a phone call away!!

 

[Harleigh]

Date: 10/4/2007 2:59:11 AM
Author: door knob solitaire
Oh Twinkie...I am so sorry. Hugs. Pat Pat...let it out...there there....now Blow your nose...pat pat... Fell better now?

I am so proud of you for not tackling her and pulling her by the hair to the nearest fountain and plunging her do in the water until she looked like a road kill. That is of course what I would have done.

I know it gets old...and I know it doesn''t help you right now...but as others have said...Blah Blah Blah imitation is the sincerest form of flattery! Oh, yeah...you just wait until it happens to you!!! As it has been said the poor little urchin has no direction and is grasping at things she thinks will make her complete. What everyone else has. In this case...the beauty you have created. It is evident in the sucker routine. That was well planned and pathetic. LOOKIE AT ME!! If there existed any grace...class...that ring would have stayed flipped in or on her lap out of view. It is apparent she is tauting you. Return the serve with kindness and go on as nothing has happened.

You continue onward...you display the Grace she lacks...she is going to again be envious of...but that is something she can''t have or copy. She has no grace deposits to withdrawal from.

It seems to me she wants to see you flip. Keep you head up...and bite your lip when you really want to pull her hair out. Get to the place of feeling sorry for her. You will find your compassion will prevail and nothing will remain but that.

DKS

If you have a minute...here is a PS...

back in HS Mr. DKS drove the coolest most envied car. One guy peeled out and did circles in a gravel parking lot to spray MR. DKS''s car with gravel-because he wanted that car so bad-he couldn''t stand it. I know I know what does this have to do with your ring...(I just happened to reference roadkill in the first paragraph)....so as I was saying... To this day, Mr. DKS has no idea how a poor little skunk was killed in his path as he drove home...but he is ever so grateful. He has the greatest respect for animal life and felt the need to share the loss with gravel boy. He left the dearly departed in the front seat of the gravel boys car-rolled up the windows to lock in the freshness. It is reported that the car was totaled. It was not possible to get within 10 feet of it.

Moral to this story...if the Grace thing doesn''t pan out...and you need roadkill work...you just say the word!!
Restoration is just a phone call away!!

Oh my goodness, my diamond Twinkie, you crack me up!

I love it! You always know JUST what to say, and you are a perfect note to sign off on tonight! Your post definitely gave me a chuckle as you so often do!

I have to say that you and Mr. DKS must be quite the pair, because you seem to have truly great ways to, you know, give a little...whether it''s giving a little somethin'' somethin'' back to those in need of a little butt-whoopin'' or just in giving of yourself, I truly value your methods of revenge...I mean, all of your great advice...yes, that''s what I appreciate!

I haven''t lost it yet...I was highly irritated, so I thought I would come here and get it all out of my system as best I can and hold it all in again tomorrow at work...though a quick slap to the girl asking what on earth she was thinking has crossed my mind a time or two! If I decide I can''t get over it, I''ll first look into the fountain idea you suggested...though she already kinda looks like a drowned rat most days anyhow as she doesn nothing with herself most days. Then, iif that doesn''t work, I''ll look into the roadkill avenue...

though I don''t know who I''ll be able to pay to do that...by the way, just HOW far away is Mr. DKS??? You know, I''ve saved a lot buying all of my dresses so cheap on ebay, so I might be able to spot him a few if he were willing to do the deed...you know, to keep my hands clean and all!

Your story about your hubby''s car was just great, though I know I''d never be nervy enough to do something like that...something about bad things coming back to bite me in the butt...you know, I just don''t want to tempt fate too much. Soooo, I will attempt to exude the Grace you seem to think me capable of...(what EVER were you thinking???

) However, I do think I will dress to the nines and wear my highest heels so I feel a bit more powerful tomorrow...even at 5''3", I am TALLER than her! So, tomorrow I will be TALL and regal and look down my nose at her! Oh, heck, who am I kidding??? I''m no good at that! I''ll go back to trying for cool disdain...we''ll see how I do...I''m just not good at being unfriendly!

Thanks again, Twinkie...I''m really glad you chimed in tonight...you always know how to make me feel better! Hope you have a great night! Sending some hugs right back at ya!

 

[door knob solitaire]

Twinkie...your appreciation for me is so sweet. Knowing I may have lightened your mood or helped change your thoughts into something better...makes me feel great! You are always so generous in your expressions!! Thank you for taking the time to tell me... Kiss Kiss.

Rock on with the heel plan! You said it...you stand taller no matter what shoe you have on!!

Grace...leave a trail of it!

DKS

when you get over the hair pulling roadkill thoughts...you may consider bringing her a ring polishing cloth. Ooh, I bet she would squirm on that gesture.

 

[Maisie]

I''m not wise and kind. In fact I can be downright horrid and childish. I would have smacked her.

 

[Lorelei]

Date: 10/4/2007 7:32:51 AM
Author: Maisie
I''m not wise and kind. In fact I can be downright horrid and childish. I would have smacked her.

 

[Cleopatra]

Wow Harleigh! That''s so un-creative of that wench! It just goes to show that you were the brain-child of her new ringset - you should feel flattered that she''s been pining over your set all this time! lol She''ll look at it forever and have that sinking feeling that she went to a jeweler, had him look up your own records, and purposely copy your beautiful ring design.

You can rest assured that your ring is the real deal - she will know in the back of her mind that hers is just a copy - however beautiful it may be.

 

[iheartscience]

Ugh. Imitation is NOT the highest form of flattery...it''s the highest form of being LAME. I used to work (and live!!!) with a girl who was the worst copy cat. Everytime I would buy something she''d ask me where I got it and say "I''m getting it!" in the next breath. She said it so often that my best friend and I still say "I''m getting it!" or "I already own it!" or "I already wore it five times!" to pretty much anything that we want to have.

Finally I called her out on it one day when it just got to be unbearable. I had bought a pretty nice pair of boots and she actually called the shoe store I got them from right then and there to see if they had her size (they did) and she had them hold them for her so she could go buy them!

I told her how irritating it was and she was like "I''m sorry..." I said "No you''re not-if you were sorry you wouldn''t do it with everything." And she actually said "Well, I''m sorry, but not sorry enough to not buy them." Hahaha! But you know what? She didn''t buy the boots so me calling her out on it worked! And from then on, I ended up actually hiding my new purchases from her for a few weeks before I wore them.

Sorry to go on and on, but I HATE being copied too! I like to have things no one else has and I have a pretty distinct personal style, so when I get copied it really irritates me! I know there are much better things in the world to worry about, but that just irriates me to no end. I''m very impressed that you didn''t call her out on copying you so completely! I would have been biting my tongue so hard it fell out of my mouth!

I can guarantee you that everyone at your work knows that she completely copied you and they probably all have their own opinions about that. I''m surprised more people haven''t let "You copied Harleigh!" slip right to her face-I know I would if you two were my coworkers!

 

[Lorelei]

I tend to think that people who do this lack confidence as they don''t have faith in themselves to make their own decisions. I have been the victim of this a lot with a family member and it is extremely irritating, even down to the food I eat and the perfume I wear and even my HAIR! It is as if *I* can eat it, it is safe and the person won''t gain weight, they don''t seem to consider the hours I spend doing cardio and watching the calories!

With my perfume and hair etc, you can guarantee if I wear a new scent, the person will drop huge hints at Holidays and birthdays that they would like " oh you know...some of that perfume you were wearing the other day..." then pretend they don''t know the name of it when they do - ugh!!! I don''t want this person to copy my perfume!! It drives me insane, let alone how you must feel with having a ring hijacked, but try to take comfort that you have the original ring and the vision which brought it to life, and that your creativity is obviously excellent to have someone want to use your design on something so costly!

 

[musey]

Date: 10/4/2007 8:33:38 AM
Author: thing2of2

Ugh. Imitation is NOT the highest form of flattery...it''s the highest form of being LAME.

YES YES YES!!! Thing2, that''s exactly how I feel

I just feel like... why can''t you think for YOURSELF?? That''s what I do. Imitate THAT!


Harleigh, I''m glad my post helped make you feel better

I just wanna sock that lady! Ugh!

 

[Haven]

Date: 10/4/2007 11:17:06 AM
Author: musey

Date: 10/4/2007 8:33:38 AM

Author: thing2of2


Ugh. Imitation is NOT the highest form of flattery...it''s the highest form of being LAME.

YES YES YES!!! Thing2, that''s exactly how I feel

I just feel like... why can''t you think for YOURSELF?? That''s what I do. Imitate THAT!



Harleigh, I''m glad my post helped make you feel better

I just wanna sock that lady! Ugh!

Thritto! How seriously lame. You know, though, ladies, we are going to have to deal with people like this our entire lives because we are just so damn cool everyone is going to want to be like us!

It sounds like you handled it with grace, Har, which makes you even cooler than cool.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I had a post a looooong time ago about a co-worker that told me flat out she was going to copy my e-ring. I was pissed.

Maybe b/c my e-ring setting is rather unique and I have never seen it on another person IRL. I was suprised by the amount of members who claimed they wouldn''t care and would be flattered. I know that is the mature answer but when you are actually in the situation it doesn''t feel so great. Luckily she broke up with her BF so it is not happening anytime soon. I think you have every right to be disappointment. I am sure you took a lot of time planning and deciding on YOUR perfect wedding set. Obviously there is nothing you can do about it but it is ok to feel hurt.

 

[MoonWater]

Harleigh, you are a much nicer person than I am. A much nicer person. Dare I say I am a b**** because I would have went off. a) she never would have gotten my ring off my finger and b) i would have called her out on copying and told her how pathetic I thought she was for copying the wedding set of another person. By the time I was done she would have felt so bad she would have changed her set again.

Kudos to you for being so sweet. You can only pity someone that desperate and pathetic.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 10/4/2007 12:25:01 PM
Author: Haven

Date: 10/4/2007 11:17:06 AM
Author: musey

Date: 10/4/2007 8:33:38 AM
Author: thing2of2

Ugh. Imitation is NOT the highest form of flattery...it''s the highest form of being LAME.

YES YES YES!!! Thing2, that''s exactly how I feel

I just feel like... why can''t you think for YOURSELF?? That''s what I do. Imitate THAT!

Harleigh, I''m glad my post helped make you feel better

I just wanna sock that lady! Ugh!

Thritto! How seriously lame. You know, though, ladies, we are going to have to deal with people like this our entire lives because we are just so damn cool everyone is going to want to be like us!

It sounds like you handled it with grace, Har, which makes you even cooler than cool.

Hahaha-so true, Haven! It''s tough being the leader!

I know I shouldn''t get so riled up about being copied, but come on!

And Tacori, I think I would be beyond p*ssed if someone actually told me to my face they were going to get my exact same ring! Wow. At least Harleigh''s copy cat had the good sense to keep her mouth shut about copying her!