Do we NEED to know how to take care of the home to get engaged??

[TheNextMrsB]

If someone doesn''t want to get engaged, they''ll always find some reason not to do it. If he actually wanted to get engaged, he would be discussing this with her and looking for a way to resolve the issue so they could move forward together.

 

[ringless]

Call me old fashioned but I do think a woman should cook, clean and provide for her husband in those ways. Of course it's 2008 and times have changed, where the man stays home with the kids half the time, etc. However, I don't agree with that guy holding off a proposal/getting married b/c he doesn't think she's wife material. Any woman can learn to cook or clean... it's not THAT difficult. I do think with their situation it goes down deeper than that... he may not think she's wife material AT ALL and may be changing his mind about marrying her, that is different. She seems like she's not acting like an adult and he wants to mary an adult not a child who cant do things for herself. Any man wants to feel taken care of and I don't think there is anything wrong with that, but he needs to talk to her and let her know how he feels.

 

[Lauren8211]

Date: 7/22/2008 3:56:04 PM
Author: ringless
Call me old fashioned but I do think a woman should cook, clean and provide for her husband in those ways. Of course it''s 2008 and times have changed, where the man stays home with the kids half the time, etc. But when I get married I want to be a suzy homemaker haha
However, I don''t agree with that guy holding off a proposal/getting married b/c he doesn''t think she''s wife material. Any woman can learn to cook or clean... it''s not THAT difficult. I do think with their situation it goes down deeper than that... he may not think she''s wife material AT ALL and may be changing his mind about marrying her, that is different.

SHOULD do those things, or SHOULD have the option to do those things if she decides thats what she''d like to do?

 

[ringless]

In my case should, because that''s how I personally feel. If other women don''t ever want to do any cleaning or cook, then that is their choice. Most men want to feel cared for and taken care of though...

 

[Bia]

Date: 7/22/2008 4:08:54 PM
Author: ringless
In my case should, because that''s how I personally feel. If other women don''t ever want to do any cleaning or cook, then that is their choice. Most men want to feel cared for and taken care of though...

Hmmmm...Does this mean that if I don''t cook and clean for my BF, then I don''t care for (or take care of) him? Just curious...

 

[Haven]

Date: 7/14/2008 2:05:56 PM
Author: tessari
Just wondering--what do you all think about the situation where the husband works long hours and wakes way more money than the wife who works part time and has summers off? Should the wife do more or all of the house chores?

I''m kind of in this situation during the summers, at least. I don''t work AT ALL during the summers (I''m a teacher). And regardless of how many hours I work, I''ll NEVER make even half as much as he makes.

I have been doing more of the chores because I''m not doing ANYTHING all day long, and hubby is getting up early and working all day. I don''t do it out of a sense of obligation or because I feel like I should, though, I do it because it''s my pleasure to do my bit when I have the time. Once the school year starts, though, hubby is going to be making most of the meals because I''ll be working serious hours.

I think the issue is about two adults living together and taking care of their home to keep it running, not about who does what to fulfill sexist roles. If a man has the expectation that his future wife should be a stereotypical, 1950s wife that''s fine, as long as he finds a woman who wants to fulfill that role. That''s certainly not my cup of tea, but my mother always says "There''s a lid to every pot!"

 

[Amzizzle]

I''m 23 and I am actually a good cook and like doing it,and am very neat and tidy...but who says I WANT to cook every meal and do all the laundry! My FF knows that if I cook he does the dishes or visa versa,and alot of the times he''ll do it all if I''m tired and same if he''s really tired. Why can''t this guy just think that even if she doesn''t know how to do these things,he might get some pretty funny moments trying to teach her.I just don''t understand why he just has to give up!

sorry guys I guess I get a little revved up on these subjects

 

[ringless]

This forum is all in good fun, we are all on here to have a good time and support eachother. We are all entitled to have our own opinions, there is no reason to get offended... this is silly. Maybe next time i'll stay out of such a controversial topic.

** I do believe a husband, boyfriend, whatever... can help out around the house too. I think my words were a little twisted around?

 

[ringless]

Bia - No, doesnt mean that at all by any means...

Very sorry if I offended anyone, not my intentions at all.

 

[Bia]

Date: 7/23/2008 4:55:34 PM
Author: ringless
Bia - No, doesnt mean that at all by any means...


Very sorry if I offended anyone, not my intentions at all.

Not offended at all hon...I promise.

I was just posing the question for argument''s sake.

I think all opinions are interesting and wanted more info...