I got the job. My mother kills me...lol.

[FrekeChild]

I think everyone has said what I would have...

And it''s all good advice.

What does John think?

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Yay, Gypsy!

How wonderful!

I probably would not try to negotiate the salary since it was better than expected. Good luck with your decision!!!

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Congrats L!!!! I am proud of you. I think since they offered even more than you asked for you should be thrilled.

 

[Gypsy]

ARGH! It ate my post!

Thank you Kaleigh, LegacyGirl, Deelight, and Mimzy.

Deco, I have heard of boundaries but I also think everyone has different boundaries. And I do feel that it is easier to judge other's boundaries rather than understand them. I understand that your salary is one of your boundaries. But honestly, with MY mother... lol, there are some battles worth fighting, and some that aren't. For me, my salary isn't one of them at all. And with this, she does want what is best for me. I know to take nearly everything she says with a grain of salt. Thank you for looking out for me though.

I will post more replies in a little while... but dinner just came off the grill!

 

[iluvcarats]

Congratulations Gypsy!
In today''s job market, to be offered one at a higher salary than you thought is terrific!
But since you are so lovable in cyber space, I am not surprised!
You go girl!!!

 

[miraclesrule]

Yayayayayaya Gypsy!! I don''t want to regurgitate the prior posts, but honestly...20% more $$$ even if all bitches are equal? I still do that deal.

Seriously, no risk=no reward. It''s scary to leave the known for the unknown. It''s human nature. It''s why so many women put up with an abusive marriage even when they know better and some have died as a result of their paralyzing fear.

Everything happens for a reason. You took the risk and applied for this job for a HUGE reason. You received this job offer as a HUGE reward. They even thought you undervalued yourself.

My advice. Take the job. You have already proven to yourself that if it doesn''t work out, you are capable of seeking and obtaining alternate employment. Could it be worse? You will never know unless you take that leap of faith.

Don''t falter now. Right now someone is looking for exactly what you have to offer.

Dang, I''m just so happy for you, I want to do the happy feet dance.

 

[Gypsy]

Hi Flygirl, thank you for the compliments, the advice, and the support.

Thank you pjean!

I know what you meant Lucky... lol. And the thought crossed my mind as well. Hey, if my work quality is as good as hers (and it is, I'm sure) and my personality is better and I'm more professional... even if they aren't planning on getting rid of her, IF they do think of getting rid of someone, hopefully it won't be me.

Hi Thing I'm the same way with my salary, obviously! Thank you for letting me know I'm in good company!

HI Michelle, thank you very much! How are you?!?

Amber, I think you are right. A SMALL reward. Maybe after we move.

I'm sure we can look at candidates at the GTG or after. Maybe a nice wallet. I could use one. Or a new purse. A nice brown one.


Thank you Freke. John is in favor of the new position. It took a while to drag it out of him, because he really wants me to make the choice. My uncle works in the same industry as the new company, and when I told him about my offer he urged me to take it. So... everyone that knows about it, is encouraging about the new position.

HI Diamondseeker and Tacori and ilove carats, and Miracles (I was hoping you'd weigh in since we do similar things). I think you are all right, and I thank you all!!

I'm going to wait till the background check comes back and confirm it with them before I give notice, but I think... I'm going to take it. It's a solid offer. I did my pro and con list. And the pros won.

 

[FrekeChild]

I wanna see the pros and cons list!!!

 

[miraclesrule]

Ahahahaha, John is a very clever man.

If I was your partner Gypsy, I would do the same thing as John. I wouldn''t want you to be able to blame it on me if it didn''t work out.

Too funny...

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 5/27/2008 9:45:13 PM
Author: thing2of2
I tell my parents my raises, salary, etc. I''m pretty open with my parents about everything (with the obvious exception of one subject!), and we''re really close. So I don''t think you''re weird for sharing that info with your mom, Gypsy! Either that or we''re both weird...

Then I''m weird too! I don''t think it''s off limits unless you *need/want* it to be off limits.

 

[Kaleigh]

Glad you came to a decision. I know you have a demon boss. Glad you are getting away from her, life is too short. Just wanted to say, at first it seemed as though you were going from one frying pan to the other. Hard to say, but am happy for you. There are no guarantees, no job is perfect. Nice pay hike, so wishing you all the best!!!

 

[miraclesrule]

Yeah, in this economy 20% is huge.
It makes my 3.2% increase look like....well, like what it is....crap.

 

[diamondfan]

If you are not happy, salary can ease the sting but not get rid of it.

If you think you can be happy, that is better than NOT being happy, for less money, right now.

You have no guarantees in life, BUT...you know you are miserable now, and have the chance to get out of it.

Sounds like a good situation, but you will never know unless you try. To me, not knowing all the nitty gritties, you have nothing to lose.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 5/27/2008 11:36:12 PM
Author: neatfreak

Date: 5/27/2008 9:45:13 PM

Author: thing2of2

I tell my parents my raises, salary, etc. I'm pretty open with my parents about everything (with the obvious exception of one subject!), and we're really close. So I don't think you're weird for sharing that info with your mom, Gypsy! Either that or we're both weird...

Then I'm weird too! I don't think it's off limits unless you *need/want* it to be off limits.

I totally agree! And we can all be weird together!

ETA that it posted in the middle of me writing, so here's the rest:

I'm glad you're going for the job, Gypsy! I think it's the right decision for you. Not to mention all the bling you can buy with that raise!

 

[Gypsy]

Some of them are going to be intentionally cryptic.

Pro:
Get away from Demon Boss
Get away from dual relationship
Better company financial stability, more divirsified customer base.
Higher salary
Better industry, broader range of contracts to work on, better for resume and potential future jobs.
Better job title
Seems like a good boss
High bonus % (but would be pro-rated to 6 months in. Still current bonus is only profit sharing and company is losing money like a sieve).

Cons:
Protection (main con and intentionally cryptic)
Bitchy co-worker could be a symptom of a negative work culture and not an isolated incident
Bitchy co-worker herself.
John commute (though after the first of the new year he could transfer within his company, and there are many places in his current company closer to where we would be living he could work).
Current company has a "no-hire back" policy I would incurr (oh well).
Some seniority I would lose (not too big a deal)


So that's my Pro and Con list.

I didn't list the new apartment, though that is a plus. And I didn't list that I really like the area we'd move to and don't care for the town we are in much, though it's colder up North. Con of the new apartment would be that its farther from my family and with my mom potentially having another surgery... its going to be a PITA and expensive to commute to.

 

[Gypsy]

Miracles, that is true! But *I* pointed out that not a few weeks ago when John was trying to decide on a new position, and I was withholding my advice HE pointed out to ME that we are a team, I am his best friend, and what he does affects me. So, what's good for the goose, good for the gander.

Thank you Neatfreak!

Kaleigh, yes. I thought that too. But as someone pointed out (and John and I talked through) a bad co-worker is different than a boss that is trying to get you fired and is psycho... who has HER boss supporting her. And his boss, in turn, dependant on her. And a) I go in knowing she's difficult and can set boundaries and b) there is a chance of being happy, where I am really NOT happy now.

Miracles, I got a 3.5 merit in March. So... that's another thing... add that to the 20, and it's higher then its even higher than it first looks.

Thing, ahhh. Bling. Bling. Bling. Bling. lol.

DF, that's a good point! It jives with my pro-con list too.

 

[miraclesrule]

Yeah, I have to say that a weighted average would be very favorable in the "Ditch Demon" category.

The fact that you will be exposed to a broader base of experience is essential for professional growth and expanding your long-term career options. The fact that the new co-worker was edgy about your wanting to keep your status current with the bar was baffling. As a lawyer herself, I found this odd to say the least.

I do have some experience with lawyers who resent my "clout" as I am a not a lawyer. So, vicariously, not only am I waiting to savor the experience of you giving notice to current employer and the Demon Boss, but I will be savoring your victory over the new co-worker who seems threatened by your existence already. It''s like a Tae Bo combo.

Crossing fingers for a clear back ground check.

 

[Gypsy]

She''s not a lawyer Miracles. Neither is the other peer. Or the hiring manager. The position when posted called for 6 years of contract experience minimum. My degree counts toward that as I have less than 2 years experience with contracts. And the last 2 lawyers they had in this position... one is with their legal department now, and the other is now in a position the equivalent to the hiring managers. Makes you think.

 

[swingirl]

Congratulations on the job offer. And you didn''t think the interview ended well! Sorry about your mother. Don''t listen to her. Enjoy the opportunity you are being given and make the decision based on your gut feeling. I''d say 20% increase is pretty darn good.

 

[miraclesrule]

Ohhhhhh, that actually puts her defensiveness in a new light. Non-lawyers are always skeptical of lawyers. Not that I speak from experience or anything.

I think that once she begins working with you, you will be able to tell if she is threatened by your competence. But it could be a win-win...her experience your education...you may even become comrades. If she doesn''t lose her job.

 

[Gypsy]

Hi Swingirl... what''s up lady with the pretty pave asscher ring? I think I concur with your opinion.

Miracles, I agree and I''ve seen it before, I just wasn''t expecting it in an interview or that naked. One person I talked to thought that maybe she was supposed to act like that, supposed to be difficult, to see how I handle it. Who knows? Guess I will find out if I take the job.

 

[swingirl]

Gypsy! I want to go to the Stanford GTG. I need a fix of some gorgeous bling and BIG asschers!! Don''t know if I can make it yet but I''m going to try.

 

[hlpkaixin3344]

gypsy - are you currently at the same job you had last yr when we met at the gtg? if so I think you really ought to move on... you weren''t happy then, you aren''t happy now - at least w/the new job you''ll have the *possibility* of things improving!!!!!! plus the extra pay is a bonus!!

 

[flopkins]

gypsy that last post was mine. weird product of my changing my email on my profile.

 

[Madam Bijoux]

Congratulations! Here''s to the best of success!

 

[Delster]

Congratulations gypsy!

I like everything AmberGretchen said in her first post - about being in control of your life again etc. And of course Ellen is right to say to trust your gut.

And of course you must get yourself a wee present! Duh!

 

[SarahLovesJS]

I am so happy for you whether you take it or not! Congratulations!!!

Woohoooo!!!

 

[iwannaprettyone]

Unfortunately you will encounter miserable people where ever you go.

Congratulations on your new opportunity, I am sure you will make the decision that best suits you and your needs!

 

[jas]

What is so wonderful to see is that you no longer are "stuck" at the wretched job. You have options...if nothing else, if you do not take this new job, you must be a little more convinced that you have control of your destiny here.

I am so happy for you!

 

[ladypirate]

Congratulations! Regardless of whether you take it, you are one in demand lady.

Do you have any better idea now that you''ve slept on it?