- Joined
- Jun 8, 2008
- Messages
- 54,821
I just wanna say -- the random comments thread
- Thread starter VRBeauty
- Start date
- Joined
- Feb 8, 2003
- Messages
- 5,565
- Joined
- Jun 17, 2009
- Messages
- 14,259
Redwood, so sorry about your father's illness, very hard to see someone you love going through this, sending good thoughts and I hope his pain can be managed so he can feel as comfortable as possible. (((hugs)))
PB, I'm sorry you're dealing with so much, and I'm hoping things improve for you soon. You have a lot on your plate and please know you can vent here anytime, sometimes it just really helps to share with others. And, I don't mean to sound harsh but honestly your parents sound a bit clueless so just ignore them and don't let their comments get to you. You're dealing with enough stress as it is. Sending lots of good thoughts to you, hang in there. (((hugs)))
Kelinas, big hugs to you, you've had a rough time of it and I'm glad you are almost moved in and I hope the rest of the month is better for you.
TP, love the pic of your grandparents! So nice of you and dh to get them new towels. Are things going ok for you lately? I think about you often.
Keeping all of my PS friends who are going through tough times in my thoughts.
PB, I'm sorry you're dealing with so much, and I'm hoping things improve for you soon. You have a lot on your plate and please know you can vent here anytime, sometimes it just really helps to share with others. And, I don't mean to sound harsh but honestly your parents sound a bit clueless so just ignore them and don't let their comments get to you. You're dealing with enough stress as it is. Sending lots of good thoughts to you, hang in there. (((hugs)))
Kelinas, big hugs to you, you've had a rough time of it and I'm glad you are almost moved in and I hope the rest of the month is better for you.
TP, love the pic of your grandparents! So nice of you and dh to get them new towels. Are things going ok for you lately? I think about you often.
Keeping all of my PS friends who are going through tough times in my thoughts.
- Joined
- Sep 3, 2013
- Messages
- 2,385
Pinto,
I'm so sorry to hear about everything you're going through.
Your husband has to stop drinking! I hope he'll realize that nothing is more important than his health. Not the job. Nothing.
He needs to take action for the sake of his health and for your relationship.
Have you looked into Al-Anon? Thankfully, I haven't had a partner who drank too much, so I don't know much about the organization, but I believe they offer support to families of alcoholics. You might want to consider reaching out to them.
I hate that you feel lonely.
Wishing I was close enough to get together for coffee and a hug.
I'm so sorry to hear about everything you're going through.
Your husband has to stop drinking! I hope he'll realize that nothing is more important than his health. Not the job. Nothing.
He needs to take action for the sake of his health and for your relationship.
Have you looked into Al-Anon? Thankfully, I haven't had a partner who drank too much, so I don't know much about the organization, but I believe they offer support to families of alcoholics. You might want to consider reaching out to them.
I hate that you feel lonely.
Wishing I was close enough to get together for coffee and a hug.
- Joined
- Mar 2, 2010
- Messages
- 1,241
4ever
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Dec 9, 2008
- Messages
- 2,260
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 10,295
- Joined
- Mar 2, 2010
- Messages
- 1,241
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 10,295
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 10,295
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2011
- Messages
- 6,589
Ladies - normally I would thank you individually, but my head space...
Let me just say that this outpouring of support has meant more than you can imagine. Cyber hugs all around!
DH has not had a drink this week. He has gone back to his kind and attentive (sober) self. I am glad that he does not have any withdrawal symptoms, other than some anxiety earlier this week in the evening. Since it's been calmer at home, I guess you can say that the adrenaline rush is gone and now I'm just plain exhausted. I've been sleeping a lot, and been depressed. i said to DH, I feel a fool because you've been lying to me for half our marriage. I have not been outside, nor have I been looking at my HOA board e-mails. My neighbor was concerned when she didn't see me around for 2 days and dropped by yesterday to say "hi", and came by again today with her husband to get some checks signed by me and say "hi" again. They are very sweet people.
The most important woman in my life - the cleaning lady, will be here tomorrow - yay!
Let me just say that this outpouring of support has meant more than you can imagine. Cyber hugs all around!
DH has not had a drink this week. He has gone back to his kind and attentive (sober) self. I am glad that he does not have any withdrawal symptoms, other than some anxiety earlier this week in the evening. Since it's been calmer at home, I guess you can say that the adrenaline rush is gone and now I'm just plain exhausted. I've been sleeping a lot, and been depressed. i said to DH, I feel a fool because you've been lying to me for half our marriage. I have not been outside, nor have I been looking at my HOA board e-mails. My neighbor was concerned when she didn't see me around for 2 days and dropped by yesterday to say "hi", and came by again today with her husband to get some checks signed by me and say "hi" again. They are very sweet people.
The most important woman in my life - the cleaning lady, will be here tomorrow - yay!
- Joined
- Sep 3, 2013
- Messages
- 2,385
Pinto,
I just have a minute but something told me to check PS. Glad I did. I'm happy to hear that your DH hasn't had a drink this week. In my unprofessional opinion, it needs to be made very clear to him that there's to be no more drinking. I hear all kinds of stories about people who quit drinking or smoking only to go back to it after thinking they'll 'just have one drink' or 'just this one cigarette won't hurt'.
Please don't beat yourself up! You are not a fool. You are a woman who believed what she was told by her DH. Alcoholics can be quite convincing and clever about trying to hide their drinking. I'm sure you heard your husband as your spouse and loved one, and therefore believed what he said. You probably weren't thinking 'Hmmm, 'alcoholic alert!', this might not be the truth he's telling me.
What your DH does affects not only him, but also you. Its not surprising that you're feeling drained and depressed. Hang in there. I'm sure I'm only one of countless people you've never met but who care about your health and happiness.
Stay strong, know your boundaries and deal-breakers, ensure your DH realizes that this is serious, try to rest, and remember that PS is full of wonderful, caring people who are here if you need to vent, seek advice, or just need a sympathetic ear and virtual shoulder to lean on.
Sending big hugs.
I just have a minute but something told me to check PS. Glad I did. I'm happy to hear that your DH hasn't had a drink this week. In my unprofessional opinion, it needs to be made very clear to him that there's to be no more drinking. I hear all kinds of stories about people who quit drinking or smoking only to go back to it after thinking they'll 'just have one drink' or 'just this one cigarette won't hurt'.
Please don't beat yourself up! You are not a fool. You are a woman who believed what she was told by her DH. Alcoholics can be quite convincing and clever about trying to hide their drinking. I'm sure you heard your husband as your spouse and loved one, and therefore believed what he said. You probably weren't thinking 'Hmmm, 'alcoholic alert!', this might not be the truth he's telling me.
What your DH does affects not only him, but also you. Its not surprising that you're feeling drained and depressed. Hang in there. I'm sure I'm only one of countless people you've never met but who care about your health and happiness.
Stay strong, know your boundaries and deal-breakers, ensure your DH realizes that this is serious, try to rest, and remember that PS is full of wonderful, caring people who are here if you need to vent, seek advice, or just need a sympathetic ear and virtual shoulder to lean on.
Sending big hugs.
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2004
- Messages
- 26,348
- Joined
- Jun 8, 2008
- Messages
- 54,821
canuk-gal|1480176901|4102743 said:Hey, (new posters) Timm, Joel21, MarlonN, Luxxy, Razz and Shondra are you all the same person (or two people)??
Yes I thought the same thing and their start dates are not that far apart from each other as they all joined October 2016...
Happy holidays Sharon!
- Joined
- Jun 7, 2014
- Messages
- 9,441
missy|1480249464|4102872 said:canuk-gal|1480176901|4102743 said:Hey, (new posters) Timm, Joel21, MarlonN, Luxxy, Razz and Shondra are you all the same person (or two people)??
Yes I thought the same thing and their start dates are not that far apart from each other as they all joined October 2016...
Happy holidays Sharon!
This post had me LOL. I was thinking the same thing!!!!
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2008
- Messages
- 27,717
Calliecake|1480264542|4102901 said:missy|1480249464|4102872 said:canuk-gal|1480176901|4102743 said:Hey, (new posters) Timm, Joel21, MarlonN, Luxxy, Razz and Shondra are you all the same person (or two people)??
Yes I thought the same thing and their start dates are not that far apart from each other as they all joined October 2016...
Happy holidays Sharon!
This post had me LOL. I was thinking the same thing!!!!
Oh my gosh...I'm not the only one that noticed these posts seemed well, similar...
(I might exclude one of them though)
Rockinruby
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2013
- Messages
- 2,740
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2004
- Messages
- 26,348
missy|1480249464|4102872 said:canuk-gal|1480176901|4102743 said:Hey, (new posters) Timm, Joel21, MarlonN, Luxxy, Razz and Shondra are you all the same person (or two people)??
Yes I thought the same thing and their start dates are not that far apart from each other as they all joined October 2016...
Happy holidays Sharon!
Happy Holidays back at you Missy!
BTW, I loved your holiday pictures--family and great food = wonderful!!!!!cheers--Sharon
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2006
- Messages
- 15,299
- Joined
- Jun 26, 2007
- Messages
- 8,685
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 10,295
Sad but flattered.
A guy in a building I work in chats with me as I go through his area. Not odd as many in that building do. I mentioned discount shipping options and he asked for my work email. I don't use it but gave him my number to text questions (i work in shipping). Turns out he wanted to chat too. Okay, cool... A friend!
(btw, I mention my husband as I chat about weekend stuff and whatever. I also wear a band.)
Oops... Turned out he didn't know I am married. He was looking for more than friends.
So now no chat. I would chat as friend (DH knows as I told him and showed original texts to be sure he was comfortable -- and all our friends know both of us anyway) but he hasn't responded to me since I mentioned DH specifically and he went "Oh! You're married!"
Anyway, sad no new friend but sort of flattered someone was interested.
A guy in a building I work in chats with me as I go through his area. Not odd as many in that building do. I mentioned discount shipping options and he asked for my work email. I don't use it but gave him my number to text questions (i work in shipping). Turns out he wanted to chat too. Okay, cool... A friend!
(btw, I mention my husband as I chat about weekend stuff and whatever. I also wear a band.)
Oops... Turned out he didn't know I am married. He was looking for more than friends.
So now no chat. I would chat as friend (DH knows as I told him and showed original texts to be sure he was comfortable -- and all our friends know both of us anyway) but he hasn't responded to me since I mentioned DH specifically and he went "Oh! You're married!"
Anyway, sad no new friend but sort of flattered someone was interested.
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2011
- Messages
- 6,589
Oh boy... Yesterday, DH told me to sniff my baby cat, Tin-Tin on the chest and around her mouth to confirm whether or not she smells like Doritos. Wow, she DOES smell like Doritos in those spots! HOW did that happen?!?!?! Fast forward a couple of hours - Tin-Tin has burrowed under the covers and is sleeping next to me with her chin and chest on my thigh. That's when it dawns on me - I've been applying either fractionated coconut oil or almond oil with geranium oil on my body, and the geranium oil smells "tangy", so that must be what's rubbing off on Tin-Tin! NOW I'm sitting here wondering if I smell like Doritos, too! 
PintoBean|1479498638|4100320 said:Ladies - normally I would thank you individually, but my head space...
Let me just say that this outpouring of support has meant more than you can imagine. Cyber hugs all around!
DH has not had a drink this week. He has gone back to his kind and attentive (sober) self. I am glad that he does not have any withdrawal symptoms, other than some anxiety earlier this week in the evening. Since it's been calmer at home, I guess you can say that the adrenaline rush is gone and now I'm just plain exhausted. I've been sleeping a lot, and been depressed. i said to DH, I feel a fool because you've been lying to me for half our marriage. I have not been outside, nor have I been looking at my HOA board e-mails. My neighbor was concerned when she didn't see me around for 2 days and dropped by yesterday to say "hi", and came by again today with her husband to get some checks signed by me and say "hi" again. They are very sweet people.
The most important woman in my life - the cleaning lady, will be here tomorrow - yay!
Hugs to you, pinto. I hope things improve for you and your husband.
- Joined
- Jun 8, 2008
- Messages
- 54,821
canuk-gal|1480284694|4102982 said:missy|1480249464|4102872 said:canuk-gal|1480176901|4102743 said:Hey, (new posters) Timm, Joel21, MarlonN, Luxxy, Razz and Shondra are you all the same person (or two people)??
Yes I thought the same thing and their start dates are not that far apart from each other as they all joined October 2016...
Happy holidays Sharon!
Happy Holidays back at you Missy!
cheers--Sharon
Hi Sharon! Thank you! And a happy belated birthday to you! Sorry I missed it and I hope you had a wonderful day. And wishing you lots of good things in the upcoming year and health and happiness always to you and your family!
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2006
- Messages
- 15,299
- Joined
- Jul 27, 2011
- Messages
- 6,589
Thank you for the hugs, momhappy!
DH had his first therapy session yesterday. He said she took a lot of notes, and told him she will first take notes, then they will have more of a dialog. She also thinks he has anxiety and depression, and she also encouraged him to go to AA meetings - he doesn't have to talk, he can just listen. (Talking to groups, especially strangers, gives him anxiety.) I asked him to ask her at the next session - "if your style of therapy and my personality do not work for me, can you refer me to someone else," as opposed to dropping therapy altogether if he doesn't like the therapist and/or her style.
While we are on monthly reflexology sessions, I told him that we should throw in yoga every other week because A) it de-stresses him, and B) he didn't complain about his sciatica when he was doing yoga! I personally hate DOING yoga, but I LOVE how I feel after each session. We have two close in-town options for yoga. No excuse not to find a class to go to every other week!
I am going to ask him to look into local AA meetings and reaching out about joining and schedules tonight.
I asked him if I came up
, and he said yes - that he can't stand when he asks me a question and I'm texting away on my phone, and there is a delay before I reply. He also said that there is resentment that we used to work in the same "office space"-esque office, but now I get to work from home and he still has to go there. I personally think he may also resent that once upon a time he always made more money, and now I make more than he does, while working from home, with nicer colleagues...
DH had his first therapy session yesterday. He said she took a lot of notes, and told him she will first take notes, then they will have more of a dialog. She also thinks he has anxiety and depression, and she also encouraged him to go to AA meetings - he doesn't have to talk, he can just listen. (Talking to groups, especially strangers, gives him anxiety.) I asked him to ask her at the next session - "if your style of therapy and my personality do not work for me, can you refer me to someone else," as opposed to dropping therapy altogether if he doesn't like the therapist and/or her style.
While we are on monthly reflexology sessions, I told him that we should throw in yoga every other week because A) it de-stresses him, and B) he didn't complain about his sciatica when he was doing yoga! I personally hate DOING yoga, but I LOVE how I feel after each session. We have two close in-town options for yoga. No excuse not to find a class to go to every other week!
I am going to ask him to look into local AA meetings and reaching out about joining and schedules tonight.
I asked him if I came up
, and he said yes - that he can't stand when he asks me a question and I'm texting away on my phone, and there is a delay before I reply. He also said that there is resentment that we used to work in the same "office space"-esque office, but now I get to work from home and he still has to go there. I personally think he may also resent that once upon a time he always made more money, and now I make more than he does, while working from home, with nicer colleagues...
- Joined
- Sep 3, 2013
- Messages
- 2,385
Pinto,
Your post makes me very happy because I feel confident that you and your DH will work together to overcome the current issues. Its wonderful that he's meeting with a therapist, and the question you want him to ask at the next session is great. It underlines the fact that therapy shouldn't be stopped, but sometimes a change in therapist is appropriate.
Its so good to hear that he was open and honest with you, telling you about the phone thing and the fact that he feels some resentment about you working from home. The only way that things can get addressed is by being open with our partner and letting them know what bothers us.
I wouldn't be surprised if your DH is uncomfortable with you making more money than him. I was in that situation with my ex and found out after we split up that he resented me making more money. Hopefully, your DH will continue to discuss his feelings with you and his therapist; not necessarily in that order.
You're a considerate and supportive spouse to want to go to yoga with him, and encourage him to attend AA. I don't know if Al-Anon would be helpful to you; just a thought.
I find your post very encouraging. Taking action to address issues is the only way to improve things. Not saying that its always easy, but it sounds like you and your DH are working together, thinking about each other, and getting help from professionals.
Sending positive thoughts!
Your post makes me very happy because I feel confident that you and your DH will work together to overcome the current issues. Its wonderful that he's meeting with a therapist, and the question you want him to ask at the next session is great. It underlines the fact that therapy shouldn't be stopped, but sometimes a change in therapist is appropriate.
Its so good to hear that he was open and honest with you, telling you about the phone thing and the fact that he feels some resentment about you working from home. The only way that things can get addressed is by being open with our partner and letting them know what bothers us.
I wouldn't be surprised if your DH is uncomfortable with you making more money than him. I was in that situation with my ex and found out after we split up that he resented me making more money. Hopefully, your DH will continue to discuss his feelings with you and his therapist; not necessarily in that order.
You're a considerate and supportive spouse to want to go to yoga with him, and encourage him to attend AA. I don't know if Al-Anon would be helpful to you; just a thought.
I find your post very encouraging. Taking action to address issues is the only way to improve things. Not saying that its always easy, but it sounds like you and your DH are working together, thinking about each other, and getting help from professionals.
Sending positive thoughts!
- Joined
- Jun 8, 2008
- Messages
- 54,821
- Joined
- Jun 17, 2009
- Messages
- 14,259
TooPatient, good to hear you and dh are doing well! Too bad your co-worker isn't friendly anymore, but it's a compliment that he was interested!
Pintobean, sounds like your dh is moving in the right direction and I'm glad, it's great that he's making an effort and taking steps to feel better - big hugs to you and hang in there, life throws all kinds of stuff at us and it's hard sometimes, please post whenever you need some support, or just to vent.
Dee*Jay, I noticed the same thing!
Pintobean, sounds like your dh is moving in the right direction and I'm glad, it's great that he's making an effort and taking steps to feel better - big hugs to you and hang in there, life throws all kinds of stuff at us and it's hard sometimes, please post whenever you need some support, or just to vent.
Dee*Jay, I noticed the same thing!
- Joined
- Sep 1, 2009
- Messages
- 10,295
I did it!!!!!
My acceptance notice came yesterday! I am now in a computer science Bachelor's program!
Filled out forms for aid. Hoping it is approved quickly. I will have to quit my job. We will lose our health insurance. DH doesn't make enough to even cover our base bills let alone tuition and groceries. But he does make enough we don't qualify for any assistance programs for insurance.
Oh!!!
My Barney rescue is going to NY next week. Along with two more I pulled day of euth and got homes in NY. And another heading to me pulled just few hours from.
My acceptance notice came yesterday! I am now in a computer science Bachelor's program!
Filled out forms for aid. Hoping it is approved quickly. I will have to quit my job. We will lose our health insurance. DH doesn't make enough to even cover our base bills let alone tuition and groceries. But he does make enough we don't qualify for any assistance programs for insurance.
Oh!!!
My Barney rescue is going to NY next week. Along with two more I pulled day of euth and got homes in NY. And another heading to me pulled just few hours from.
300x240.png)