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I'm having Mother issues!

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Sorry for chiming in so late, but I LOVE the Porsha!! It's just gorgeous! And I also love those shoes w/ the kitten heels. I also have the curse...the height curse...so I'll be looking for low shoes too when the time comes. Those sparkly ones are so pretty & dainty!

ETA: These are cute too!

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Thanks for all your great shoe ideas! Unfortunately, I can''t even have those tiny little heels. Me and my fiance are EXACTLY the same height. Bummer..
 
Dear Dodger Girl, where did you get those beautiful sparkly white/silver shoes from...I have been looking for shoes and cant find anything nice with a low heel...any help would be appreaciated...


As for the Mother issues, me and my mum had a perfect relationship (most people think we are sitsters), but when I started planning my wedding it became a different thing. The fact is you will almost definately clash, quarrel, disagree...but afterall it is your wedding and when the day comes your mother will cry tears of happiness and hopefully it will be like the fueds never happened...

Good luck with the dress
 
I am also chiming in a little late here, but thought I would say a few things.

First of all, I LOVE that Porsha dress. Where did you get that back view photo? It is a spectacular gown in my opinion and my favorite choice of the 3 dresses you posted. WOW!!! The front view just does NOT do that dress justice...

As far as prices go, another option besides looking for the dress online (I believe Maggie Sottero says not authenticity is not guaranteed unless purchased from an authorized bridal shop retailer) is to just look for bridal shops near you (or maybe even farther away from you) and call on the phone and ask them to price it for you. I bought a Maggie dress and did that, since I myself am frugal and always looking to save some bucks if I can. I found that the prices of my dress varied by as much as $400 between shops for no darn good reason....just something to think about.

Like Tybee, my mom passed away a few years ago and I so wish she had been around to help me with wedding preparations. But I actually would be concerned that my mom would have said "money is no object" when it really was and would have wanted to spend way beyond our means or what we would think is logical. All moms are different....I am sure you will work it out with her. From everything you''ve said, I am certain that she loves you and if you talk to her about it, maybe she''ll recognize more easily what she might have done to hurt your feelings and you can make amends.
 
The website I found the dress on is an actual authorized bridal shop in Texas and they guarantee authenticity.
 
All of those dresses are lovely! As for flats I have seen several cut epairs in bridal magazines. I do not have a scanner but if you would like I can take pcitures of the pages and post them.
 
Sure, I'd love to see them! As long as it's not too much trouble.
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#3 is really stunning, so perfectly elegant and sophisticated
#2 is stunning too and I love the straps
#1 is my least fave of the three but I love the bustline (don''t get me wrong, it''s a stunning dress as well but I like the other 2 better)
 
Well, my girlfriend Regina totally up-ed my budget for a dress today. We decided not to go for dress number three. In person, it just didn''t look as good as the other two. But now we''ve added another possibility to the list. I didn''t want it because I''ve seen so many other brides buying this dress, but it looked SO good on me, I had to consider it (even though it''s like 4 hundred bucks more than the Porsha). Both of our favorites now are the Porsha and the Chantilly. I attached the chantilly to this post and the porsha on the next one.

Chantilly.jpg
 
WOW! They are both beautiful. I like the porsha especially, but it all depends on what looks good on you and what fits your budget. Remember, you will only wear this dress once for a few hours- so only you can know if the difference in price is worth it.
 
Well, she wasn't thrilled about the Porsha just by looking at the magazine picture, but when she saw it on me, she totally changed her mind. The pictures just totally don't do these dresses justice. Even the Chantilly. I wasn't thrilled about it when it was on the manneqiun, but I tried it on just for kicks because she wanted to see me in a pure white dress (all the others I tried on were ivory). I fell in love after I put it on and so did she. She was talking about it for the rest of the day.
 
Yes, you can definitely get a better sense of whether you like a dress or not when you try it on (as opposed to looking at it in pictures.) I think both dresses are stunning. Can the Porsha be ordered in pure white? Try not to be influenced too much by the colors of sample dresses--most can be ordered for you in white. I think you''ll know when you try on "the one."
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Yes, the Porsha can be ordered in pure white. I really like the way the ivory looks with my skin-tone, but my mother doesn''t really like the ivory because she says it looks dirty and dingy. I don''t know, she may change her mind when she sees it on me.
 
from your picture in the avatar i think you would look great in either of those dresses. i am a fan of the pure white and ivory colored dresses. i hope things are easier for you with your mother. i am a mother of an adult daughter myself. this too will pass. best wishes! banjo
 
aphisglovessae - Too bad you didn''t decide earlier! You could have bought AmberGretchen''s Chantilly! So your mom has still not seen the dresses on you? When are you going to take her?!
I personally like the Porsha better.. but I haven''t seen them on you!
 
I don''t know when I''m going to be able to take her. She lives 2.5 hours away and she has a hard time getting a day off because she''s short staffed at work. She''s the supervisor so she has to be there a lot. I figure when I actually do take her, I''m not telling her the prices and I''m going to tell the bridal shop not to tell her either. She might get pissed about it, but I''ll just tell her flat out that price is not my concern right now and that I''m more concerned about which dress I want. I''m pretty much not going to tell her most of the prices for everything and when it''s all over I''ll tell them to give me whatever they want to contribute to the wedding. Then I''ll pay off what I can. I figure that''ll get rid of most of the financial arguments.
 
Since it's a Maggie, can you order it in "Diamond White"? Mine is a Maggie, and I liked the Diamond White because it is not stark white, but not as yellow/beige as Ivory either. It's more like a soft white with a silvery quality. I LUVS IT!!!!
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ETA: Soontobemarried: I don't remember where I found those shoes, let me try and find them again and I'll tell ya where I found them. LOL.
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I would suggest to get past the money, take a little loan if needed and agreed upon with your fiancee and get to more memorable events that your mother can help you with. Money matters can become terrible events and can ruin a relationship. Don't let it get in the way of you and your mom. Lots of girls have no help financially from parents for their weddings. It's a special day, and planning it should also be special.

Great place to consider purchasing a gown
(where I got mine;extremely affordable)

Davids Bridal, here's there website:David's Bridal Home Page
 
I had a long talk with my dad about everything last night and I think he's finally understanding where I'm coming from. So hopefully things will get better. I basically told him that to prevent constant arguments and stress on all of us, I'm just going to plan my wedding without discussing finances with them. I just want them to be included in the decisions as my parents and not my financial advisors. When it's all over, if they want to contribute and help us out with the wedding, then they can give us whatever they feel is a fair amount and we'll be very appreciative. If not, we'll still be happy. He says that he's pretty sure that my mom wants to pay for most of it, but they want to be practical about it and don't want to break their pocketbooks and let me get into too much debt at the same time. I understand where they're coming from, but this stuff isn't cheap and I don't want to regret anything about my wedding since I only plan on doing this once. I want this to be a day to remember for a long time to come and I want it to be nice.
 
I just HAVE to tell you that I saw Porsha today at a bridal show, and that dress is absolutley to DIE FOR. They did a lot of Maggies and it was interesting to see what they looked like in person, because its different even then seeing pics of them on real people, you know?

For example, I''ve never liked Grace, because I always thought it gave most girls a funny shape, but it must have just been the knotties who wore it just were funny shaped, because when I saw it on the girl today, it was GORGEOUS. I think if I didn''t already have a dress, it would have made me run out and buy it! The lace on it is just so pretty.
 
I wish all of you having Mother issues the best. My mom told me over the weekend that she didn''t want to come to one of my ceremonies. Finally changed her mind, but I see how important I am to her.
 
Oh no! That''s not something a mother should say. And then she took it back?
 
She never took it back, just changed her mind and agreed to come after we basically begged and pleaded.

Sucks. Feelings I''ve had since i was 5 years old (earliest incident I can remember) just crystallized this weekend. Watching tv and sports, you see all these happy people saying, "Hi mom!" and not understanding what it must feel like to want to say that.
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Oh well, my life isn''t total crap. I''m still a lot better off than the poor people hit by Katrina for example. It''s just really bad cuz I''m still dealing with the stupid Hilton that double-booked my ceremony.
 
Oh so sorry.
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This is supposed to be a happy time for you.
 
I can feel your frustration but I can promise you this.

Your mother may surprise you from time to time, but ultimately, she will never change. Never ever.

Your best bet would be to buy your own gown. Pay for your own wedding.

Maybe your folks can contribute a set amount that they feel comfortable with.

For your own sanity, you''ll be better on your own.

Now here''s my lecture.

You''re an adult now. Take control of your own life. No longer do you let your mother''s financial hold over you make you cry. Your tears will only make your pillow wet and give you bags under your eyes.

No one should be stressing you out right now. Don''t let your mom.
 
Great, just when I thought everything was fine again.
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I called my parents tonight (I call a few times a week, usually) and talked to dad as usual. When he was done he asked my mom if she wanted to talk to me. She said "I have nothing to say."
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I haven't talked to my mom in a couple of weeks because she hasn't been feeling well, but other than that I can't figure out what I could have possibly done to piss her off. With her it's like: if the wind changes, so does her mood. It seems like she gets pissed at me if I breathe wrong. I swear she's going through "the change" but she's actually been like this my whole life. It totally ruins my day. Especially if I can't figure out what I did wrong. I end up obsessing over it and it ruins everything: work, school, etc. Why does she feel she has to do this to me all the time? *screams*
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ETA: I talked to my dad the next day and turns out it was a misunderstanding. She only said that because she knew my dad was planning on calling my grandpa after talking to me and she didn't want to run the phone battery down (when we talk it's usually for a REALLY long time). He said she brought it up to him after he hung up with me.
 
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