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Introducing him as ''Boyfriend''

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I totally agree!! I feel the same way, and am equally annoyed with the title. Arg. I mean, we talk about the wedding and we know we''re getting married, so BF just doesn''t seem right. Sometimes I joke with him and say, "Hey Future Fiance!" haha. *sigh*
 
Date: 12/10/2008 4:26:25 PM
Author: swedish bean
I totally agree!! I feel the same way, and am equally annoyed with the title. Arg. I mean, we talk about the wedding and we know we''re getting married, so BF just doesn''t seem right. Sometimes I joke with him and say, ''Hey Future Fiance!'' haha. *sigh*
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LMAO! I love the "Future Fiance!" I should do that to my FI and refer to him as Future Husband!
 
well, until he''s your fiance, he''s your boyfriend...so, if he doesn''t like it...tell him get the ring!
 
I just wanted to say I hate the term "wifey" too. FI liked to use it when talking to his buddies and to annoy me as well which I didn''t find too amusing.
 
I also HATE the terms boyfriend/girlfriend. WE ARE GROWN ADULTS! I called guys ''boyfriend'' back in middle and high school, jeez! ''Fiance'' is also inappropriate as we''re not yet engaged, and anything along the lines of ''future husband/wife'' sounds like we''re engaged when we''re not. I had also thought about using partner since it sounds more appropriate for how committed we are, but I never really thought about that sounding like we''re gay...I don''t know what we should do! We need to invent some new terms...
 
I dunno... I''ve gotten so used to calling him my boyfriend (almost 4 years) that I keep forgetting to call him my fiance.

Then when I do remember, people make a huge fuss about it.. "oh my gosh, when are you getting married, how did he propose... etc"

I get kind of uncomfortable when I get tons of attention from strangers, and I don''t always have the time to sit and gush about it.

So until he becomes my husband, it''ll probably be boyfriend... I think there''s a sweet innocence to referring to each other as gf/bf.
 
Yeah, unless you''ve got four children in tow and people look at you funny!
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If I were waiting after 5 or more years (and I wouldn''t be
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), then I would introduce him as "my commitment phobic partner"
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Of course I have a sarcastic sense...when I was p.o.''d at a husband I would refer to them as "my current husband"
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I definitely agree! I actually said something to SO a couple months ago. It actually feels wrong for me to say boyfriend, like calling my best friends my "friends". I introduce them as my best friend "soandso" why should I have to just call my SO my boyfriend. It makes me feel like I''m back in high school or something, especially since we''re getting engaged this summer.
 
I dont mind calling my SO my boyfriend in some cases, but when we are trying to get a couples'' discount for the gym or something like that i feel like a moron calling him my "boyfriend" because it just doesn''t seem as significant :-/
 
We used significant other and partner since we were together quite a while before we got married. My husband liked to refer to me by saying "this is my lover" especially at formal functions just to get a rise out of people.
 
Date: 12/10/2008 7:26:39 PM
Author: purrfectpear
If I were waiting after 5 or more years (and I wouldn''t be
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), then I would introduce him as ''my commitment phobic partner''
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Of course I have a sarcastic sense...when I was p.o.''d at a husband I would refer to them as ''my current husband''
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LMAO, that''s funny :)


Before we got engaged we would refer to each other as GF/BF in public but in private we would (and still do) call each other future wifey and future hubby, not sure why so many people hate the term wifey but I think it is cute.

Now we are engaged he mostly still calls me his GF when I pulled him up on it he told me well you are your a girl and my best friend. His other reasoning is that I am with him because I love him and want to be there because I want to rather then being bound to him because of a ring.

I think it is just he forgets because I have was his GF for over 10yrs either way it is cute and sweet.
 
I hate being a girlfriend (in name, I like being attached to him!) and I hate that''s he''s my "boyfriend". It sounds completely juvenile. UGH. I didn''t want to call my last boyfriend a "boyfriend" but that''s because I didn''t want to be in a relationship with him. Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!

With FF, I can''t wait to call him hubby! (I do it around the house already.)

Oh! And I have introduced him as "This is my betrothed, D." Hahahahaha, because I decided it''s such an antique term and it means "agreed to marry", which we are, it fits. Without saying that we''re engaged--which means there is wedding planning going on. (To me anyway...)
 
how about introducing him as your lover?
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Date: 12/10/2008 8:54:45 PM
Author: FrekeChild
I hate being a girlfriend (in name, I like being attached to him!) and I hate that''s he''s my ''boyfriend''. It sounds completely juvenile. UGH. I didn''t want to call my last boyfriend a ''boyfriend'' but that''s because I didn''t want to be in a relationship with him. Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!

With FF, I can''t wait to call him hubby! (I do it around the house already.)

Oh! And I have introduced him as ''This is my betrothed, D.'' Hahahahaha, because I decided it''s such an antique term and it means ''agreed to marry'', which we are, it fits. Without saying that we''re engaged--which means there is wedding planning going on. (To me anyway...)
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I think that''s what it is for me too-- "BOYFRIEND/ GIRLFRIEND" sounds so childish-- and just not "serious" enough.
 
Date: 12/10/2008 7:26:39 PM
Author: purrfectpear
If I were waiting after 5 or more years (and I wouldn''t be
2.gif
), then I would introduce him as ''my commitment phobic partner''
11.gif



Of course I have a sarcastic sense...when I was p.o.''d at a husband I would refer to them as ''my current husband''
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Click to expand...

Ha!
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I just came back from dinner with a colleague of my fiance''s and his wife. This was the first time we had met his his wife, and he introduced her as "..My future ex-wife" He was joking, but she was SO not amused, the poor woman!!!!
 
I''m in the camp with everyone who thinks "fiance" is a weird word. I still use it, but it just feel really odd every time it leaves my mouth. I try to use FI''s name as much as I can when telling stories, but it is really difficult sometimes since my brother has the same name and two of my best friends are dating/engaged to guys that also have the same name.

Purrfectpear, I love "my current husband." I''m storing that one away
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.

Oh, and ditto to disliking "wifey." I had a boyfriend who would call me that sometimes, and it was childish and patronizing coming from him. I''ve heard it used in the same patronizing way by a number of guys my age, so it gives me kind of an icky feeling. I can see how it would be cute as a pet name, but I''ve just heard it used in a not-so-cute, almost disrespectful way.

In my native language, the words for husband and wife are just "man" and "woman" with a possessive pronoun, so your husband is just "your man."

Finally, to the OP: try not calling him anything. Just introduce him to family and friends as "HisName." People are very perceptive regarding relationship status--meaning they can quickly pick up whether you''re together or not--they''ll figure out what your relationship is all about on their own. If they ask, you can say, "We''ve been dating for a while" (or whatever you feel comfortable saying). Enough said.
 
Depending on who I am talking to, I will refer to him as my boyfriend or my partner. Sometimes I don''t feel like letting people know how serious we are, then I will use boyfriend (usually when talking to people my age who don''t know me very well), other than that I use partner.
 
This is totally off topic.......

Bobbin, your puppy is just so completely ridiculously cute!!

Okay, back to the subject at hand, sorry for the interruption.
 
Purrfectpear, dear, that post is priceless. I am filing it away in memory to pull out when I need some cheer.

I never had a problem with boyfriend/girlfriend--that''s what we were. We were not engaged, we were not married, we were dating. I didn''t feel any less happy with the terms three years into our relationship, they seem pretty apt to me. I also called him "my man" a lot. And if I ever refer to him in front of my students I call him "Mr. Havenslastname" which always sounds odd, but that''s what they''d have to call him, so it''s right!

I did have a hard time with "fiance" and "fiancee", though. I didn''t dislike the terms, it was just a hard adjustment. DH called me his girlfriend more than once on our honeymoon, he apparently found the adjustment difficult, too.

I do love calling him my husband, now.
 
Date: 12/10/2008 8:54:45 PM
Author: FrekeChild
I hate being a girlfriend (in name, I like being attached to him!) and I hate that''s he''s my ''boyfriend''. It sounds completely juvenile. UGH. I didn''t want to call my last boyfriend a ''boyfriend'' but that''s because I didn''t want to be in a relationship with him. Hahahahahaha!!!!!!!!

With FF, I can''t wait to call him hubby! (I do it around the house already.)

Oh! And I have introduced him as ''This is my betrothed, D.'' Hahahahaha, because I decided it''s such an antique term and it means ''agreed to marry'', which we are, it fits. Without saying that we''re engaged--which means there is wedding planning going on. (To me anyway...)
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Hahaha!!! I hear that! "This is my ...cringe...boyfriend."

We''ve called each other husband and wife around my married friends, but single friends think it''s weird. FF''s g-ma always refers to me as his beloved. I think it''s cute!
 
Date: 12/11/2008 2:08:20 PM
Author: lovelee
This is totally off topic.......


Bobbin, your puppy is just so completely ridiculously cute!!


Okay, back to the subject at hand, sorry for the interruption.
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Thanks lovelee! She is a great little puppy- she is currently sleeping n my lap. If you want more pictures there are some on this thread: https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/introducing-lucy.96600/

She looks a little different now though as that was two months ago!

End threadjack-
 
Date: 12/11/2008 5:34:51 PM
Author: Haven

I never had a problem with boyfriend/girlfriend--that's what we were. We were not engaged, we were not married, we were dating. I didn't feel any less happy with the terms three years into our relationship, they seem pretty apt to me. I also called him 'my man' a lot. And if I ever refer to him in front of my students I call him 'Mr. Havenslastname' which always sounds odd, but that's what they'd have to call him, so it's right!
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same here. anyone who knew me knew how serious we were, and anyone who didn't, well, i didn't really care if they knew if we were picking our rings or not. i knew where our relationship stood and despite my LIW anxiety, i never felt insecure about being "just a girlfriend". i think that the relationship defines the term, not the other way around.

we've been engaged over a year and i don't think i've called him my fiance more than two or three times and i doubt that he constantly refers to me as his fiancee (i agree that's it a completely obnoxious word to say). but then again i wasn't constantly saying "this is my boooyyyffrrrieenndd, stefan". it more like "this is STEFAN" (dum dum dum).
 
i totally felt like this before i was engaged. i felt like i was in sixth grade introducing him as my boyfriend. the good news is that once the ring comes, u will never call him that again!
 
I use to hate calling him my boyfriend as well, but because I am young, fiance just sounds so damm protencious and I feel like I am bragging.

In australia (where I live) the term most commonly used for long term relationships is partner, and because it is so common most people don''t assume it is a same sex relationship so that isn''t a problem. I use to refer to him as partner before we were engaged. We had been together for four years and lived together for two so that made the most sense to me.

I think partner kind of defines it well. In my opinion a partner is someone you have been with for a long period of time say a few years and live with.
Although I have heard a few friends refer to the guy they were dating for approximatelly 6 weeks as their partner ... that sounds strange to me, at that point in time he would be lucky to be refered to as my boyfriend, just my opinnion though.

Its so difficult, yes other posters have said it your relationships is more than" boyfriend and girlfriend stuff" and you wold like to represent that, on the same hand, you relationship is your business and you shouldn''t have to justify or explain where you are.

To me though, comparing someones boyfriend of two weeks to yours of four years, well the relationships can''t really compare can they! And i think thats the reason why most of us LIW or former LIW cannot stand the term.
 
Date: 12/11/2008 9:23:08 PM
Author: supergirl10
I use to hate calling him my boyfriend as well, but because I am young, fiance just sounds so damm protencious and I feel like I am bragging.


In australia (where I live) the term most commonly used for long term relationships is partner, and because it is so common most people don't assume it is a same sex relationship so that isn't a problem. I use to refer to him as partner before we were engaged. We had been together for four years and lived together for two so that made the most sense to me.


I think partner kind of defines it well. In my opinion a partner is someone you have been with for a long period of time say a few years and live with.

Although I have heard a few friends refer to the guy they were dating for approximatelly 6 weeks as their partner ... that sounds strange to me, at that point in time he would be lucky to be refered to as my boyfriend, just my opinnion though.


Its so difficult, yes other posters have said it your relationships is more than' boyfriend and girlfriend stuff' and you wold like to represent that, on the same hand, you relationship is your business and you shouldn't have to justify or explain where you are.


To me though, comparing someones boyfriend of two weeks to yours of four years, well the relationships can't really compare can they! And i think thats the reason why most of us LIW or former LIW cannot stand the term.
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A twenty year marriage cannot compare to a pair of newlyweds on their honeymoon, but they still have the same titles of husband and wife. I can see where the discomfort comes from and empathize, but at least for me, the dissatisfaction came from the actual state of the relationship and not the title itself. He was just my boyfriend until we were engaged. People knew we were serious since I had moved across state to be with him, and that was enough for me. It was a bit weird to be around "the navy wives" at times (like in year 3), but eh... it wasn't that big of a deal to me by the end of our dating relationship (6 years).


I'm in the camp that usually introduces people (both friends and boyfriends) simply by their name, so it wasn't really an issue for me.


ETA - I've noticed that Kyle introduces me as his fiance a lot, or says, "hey, that's my fiance you're talking to" to his friends when they make a sarcastic remark. It makes me smile since I don't recall him ever making a big deal out of calling me his girlfriend. I think he likes it!
 
Practically everyone in Australia, down to the fifteen-year-olds, seems to use the word 'partner', which I, being a non-joiner-inner-type person, actually hate. It seems such a grey word, deliberately obstructive in meaning.

ETA: oops, sorry supergirl! I hope I'm not offending you!
If other languages can have dozens of words for snow, love etc etc, then I think we should have variety in our choices of describing our SO.
And yes, loved the idea of a word that describes a more serious (but still officially casual) break-up!
 
Why not skip "boyfriend", if the term is so bothersome, and introduce your boyfriend as "This is insertmansnamehere"? Anyone who wants to know the connection will ask and if asked you can refer to him as your partner, significant other, or some other term that suits you better.
 
I didn't mind the term boyfriend.

I actually hated the word "fiancé". I don't know why. I guess it sounded pretentious to me. I hardly ever introduced him as my fiancé.

Someone mentioned it up earlier... I HATE the term "wifey". My husband subconsciously called me that to someone; he was walking down the hall, and I was waiting for him. And whoever he was talking to, he said "oh, there's my wifey now!" [He was saying something about how I was supposed to meet him.] Bah. I think he calls me that when I'm not around...

But, I call him all kinds of absurd nicknames, so I guess I can't complain, huh? [My friends all get a kick out of "hubster". "I gotta ask the hubster first!"]
 
What''s up with "wifey"? Is it really common in a particular region? I have never heard it in my entire life. It sounds like a sweet word that has been misused so much that people hate it now.
 
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