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"Old Money Aesthetic" vs. "Nouveau Riche" Rules on Social Media

  • Thread starter Thread starter Betty Baguette
  • Start date Start date
smitcompton said:
Hi.
A young man came on the diamond board and asked what we thought of a ring he wanted to purchase from Cartier. My honest answer was that if I received such a ring I would cry with joy. Of course if I wanted to appear as if I belonged in the old money class I would just whisper in the ears of any passerby that the ring was from Cartier. Whisper is good.

My first job out of high school was as a teller at an old money bank on Madison and 63rd in Manhattan, At the time we had air raid shelter drills. The bank closed and locked its doors until the all clear signal was sounded. The bank locked out a customer after the doors were locked and everyone took shelter. What ensued was quite a spectacle. She caused a scene and thought her rank as a rich person afforded her all exemptions from the rules.. A VP had to come and hold her hand as she made noises about lawsuits and withdrawing her money from the bank. Old money can misbehave too.

Sometimes I like logos-- a man in a pair of Gucci loafers is for me . Have fun.

Annette
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Yep, and here's another example of "classy" old money. Remember him? :lol::

 
I think the topic is very interesting, especially as it clearly varies globally! :think:

I was raised poor but my mother I believe originally came from a fairly comfortable British family and was very clear on the saying "money doesn't buy class" and often encouraged us to not to display nouveau riche behaviours.

To this day (and I'm not rich now either :lol:) I agree with much of what she says - don't be ostentatious, don't be flashy with your wealth, don't cover yourself in logos and tacky jewels. The latest gadget, car or whatever doesn't make you cooler or better somehow...

Old money in theory is essentially about being comfortable in your own skin. Buy the best quality of anything you can & look after it forever. Be well groomed & always polite. Don't seek gratification from others, be confident in your own value. Quiet elegance above all.
 
purplesilk said:
In my world the new/old money rules don't apply to children: both new money and old money people buy brand clothes for their children (Woolrich winter jackets, Ralph Lauren sweaters , Burberry trenches, Armani suites, Dolce and Gabbana dresses, LV little bags, ...)
Click to expand...

That's fascinating and strange!

What is your home world called?
 
But here, even rich people put their children in public schools; private schools are seen as a "shame" because you put your children in a private school if they're not clever enough to pass public school 's exams.
 
And no health insurance: old people (even middle class) and young children get health assistance for free; adults pay some exams (blood, ecographies, ...) only if above a certain year income; surgery, chemo and everything else is free for everyone.
If you suffer from chronicle illness, no matter if poor or rich, you get a card that allows you to get even routine exams for free.
Also illegal immigrants get health exams and surgical procedures for free.
 
But we pay high taxes: on money income, on fuel, on food, ...
 
My apologies to the OP for going off topic.
I had a pindaric fligh: it all started as I wanted to share that my child's school mate (public school) wears a cachemire winter coat , small version of her mom's cachemire winter coat; the same girl wears a D&G leather jacket.
The girl's family is milionarie because her maternal grandfather started a successful business forty years ago.
 
Just a small shout out for The Row.

I recently bought a handbag from them. I went back and forth between ALL the big name brands and theirs were the most beautifully made and reasonably priced. I adore my new bag and will probably have it for the rest of my life.

If I were genuinely wealthy, The Row is the only brand from which I'd buy my bags; there are at least 50 bags on that site I'd love to own! I feel similarly about their shoes.

I also find a lot of their clothes to be very beautiful, tho their color palette is very limited. Their things tend to be exquisitely sourced and made, and beautiful, without veering into the "so artsy it looks ridiculous" space. I don't love all of their clothes - but I don't love all of anyone's clothes - not even my own!

So I'm a lifetime customer - tho in a very modest way.

ETA. When I bought the most recent bag from them (I've bought a couple over the years), I ordered it one afternoon and was unwrapping it at 10.30am the next morning. You can't fault that service.
 
Betty Baguette said:
Just curious...how big is the average engagement ring stone in north Italy?
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Try not to laugh...
Average engagement ring is from 0.1 ct to 0.3 ct.
0.4 ct is considered quite big.
0.5 ct is big.
1 ct is considered a rock also between the rich: most people assume it's a cz and they get judgemental if they know it's an earth mined diamond ( it's considered a waste of money: the bride-to-be is judged superficial and everyone swears the marriage will end in divorce).
Everything over 1 ct is considered garish and ostentatious.
Most G/H colors and VS/SI clarity.
HRD/GIA/IGI ex ex ex is considered the top choice.
AGS lab is considered as EGL lab (no reputable jeweller carries AGS or EGL).
If the diamond is 0.5 ct or above, women tend not to wear engagement rings, only a wedding band, after the wedding on daily basis; average wedding band is on the chunky side (I consider the average 5 mm width chunky; mine is 3 mm and I wish I went a thinner for stacking purposes) and it's traditionally plain yellow gold. (Only the very rich get platinum bands).
Average people here buy tons of Pandora jewels.
Average people assume that your husband-to-be is deeply in love if he buys Recarlo, Donnaoro and other mall brands.
The rich go crazy for basic lines by Pomellato, Bulgari and Cartier (if you wear a Bulgari B Zero ring or a Cartier Trinity ring , everyone assumes you're milionarie);
the very rich buy solitaires by Damiani, Salvini or Tiffany.
A lot of fake Rolex watches.
Rich people are quite obsessed with brand fashion clothes and brand cars (spotting a Porsche Cayenne is not rare here).
 
purplesilk said:
Try not to laugh...
Average engagement ring is from 0.1 ct to 0.3 ct.
0.4 ct is considered quite big.
0.5 ct is big.
1 ct is considered a rock also between the rich: most people assume it's a cz and they get judgemental if they know it's an earth mined diamond ( it's considered a waste of money: the bride-to-be is judged superficial and everyone swears the marriage will end in divorce).
Everything over 1 ct is considered garish and ostentatious.
Most G/H colors and VS/SI clarity.
HRD/GIA/IGI ex ex ex is considered the top choice.
AGS lab is considered as EGL lab (no reputable jeweller carries AGS or EGL).
If the diamond is 0.5 ct or above, women tend not to wear engagement rings, only a wedding band, after the wedding on daily basis; average wedding band is on the chunky side (I consider the average 5 mm width chunky; mine is 3 mm and I wish I went a thinner for stacking purposes) and it's traditionally plain yellow gold. (Only the very rich get platinum bands).
Average people here buy tons of Pandora jewels.
Average people assume that your husband-to-be is deeply in love if he buys Recarlo, Donnaoro and other mall brands.
The rich go crazy for basic lines by Pomellato, Bulgari and Cartier (if you wear a Bulgari B Zero ring or a Cartier Trinity ring , everyone assumes you're milionarie);
the very rich buy solitaires by Damiani, Salvini or Tiffany.
A lot of fake Rolex watches.
Rich people are quite obsessed with brand fashion clothes and brand cars (spotting a Porsche Cayenne is not rare here).
Click to expand...

All that matters to me in a diamond is excellent light performance, which you haven't mentioned.
 
purplesilk said:
Try not to laugh...
Average engagement ring is from 0.1 ct to 0.3 ct.
0.4 ct is considered quite big.
0.5 ct is big.
1 ct is considered a rock also between the rich: most people assume it's a cz and they get judgemental if they know it's an earth mined diamond ( it's considered a waste of money: the bride-to-be is judged superficial and everyone swears the marriage will end in divorce).
Everything over 1 ct is considered garish and ostentatious.
Most G/H colors and VS/SI clarity.
HRD/GIA/IGI ex ex ex is considered the top choice.
AGS lab is considered as EGL lab (no reputable jeweller carries AGS or EGL).
If the diamond is 0.5 ct or above, women tend not to wear engagement rings, only a wedding band, after the wedding on daily basis; average wedding band is on the chunky side (I consider the average 5 mm width chunky; mine is 3 mm and I wish I went a thinner for stacking purposes) and it's traditionally plain yellow gold. (Only the very rich get platinum bands).
Average people here buy tons of Pandora jewels.
Average people assume that your husband-to-be is deeply in love if he buys Recarlo, Donnaoro and other mall brands.
The rich go crazy for basic lines by Pomellato, Bulgari and Cartier (if you wear a Bulgari B Zero ring or a Cartier Trinity ring , everyone assumes you're milionarie);
the very rich buy solitaires by Damiani, Salvini or Tiffany.
A lot of fake Rolex watches.
Rich people are quite obsessed with brand fashion clothes and brand cars (spotting a Porsche Cayenne is not rare here).
Click to expand...

Thanks for sharing, @purplesilk!

Is there an Italian version of PS? If so, I think my rings and I belong over there. :lol:
 
kenny said:
All that matters to me in a diamond is excellent light performance, which you haven't mentioned.
Click to expand...
I agree with you, but since, you're diamond educated , you did't get what I meant when I said that HRD/GIA/IGI ex ex ex is the top (cut).
Italian people and Italian jewellers trust the certificate: no one takes the time to verify if percentages and angles work together well; if it's written ex ex ex on the certificate, no one doubts that cut is the top cut and that the diamond has superb light return (I can't mention the "fights" with my local jeweller when I ask to check the numbers on the certificate before buying...!!!).
 
Betty Baguette said:
Thanks for sharing, @purplesilk!

Is there an Italian version of PS? If so, I think my rings and I belong over there. :lol:
Click to expand...

There are a couple of popular Italian forums, where I' m not a member because their advice give me the nerves; sometimes I lurk just to put my feet on the ground and "go back to my reality" after my Pricescope sessions.

In one forum, a so called "gemologist expert" gives elusive advice on how to get a beautiful diamond or other precious gemstones based on this tipical advice: "Go to a reputable jeweller, not to the mall, and trust the ex/vg/fair comment on the certificate because, the gemologist who wrote it, knows it better than you who got your knowledge from the web).

The other popular forum is basically a wedding planning advice forum: women get insulted if they don't like the ring they were proposed with or gush over the dreamed "half carat" stone; other women tipically write:
" You're a superficial brat!"
" You don't deserve a man that wants to marry you!"
"Your marriage will end in divorce if you 're attached to such useless things!"
"I' m struggling with mortage, I wish I had your trivial problems!".
"People around the world are starving so you're a brat".
Small diamonds are recommended; the cluster look goes strong if you're heart is really set on finger coverage ( they usually are satisfied to mimic the 0,3 ct look).
In that forum the engagement ring upgrade is taboo: you can get another ring for big anniversaries or for baby birth (tipically a solitaire if you were not already given or the girl/boy diamond pendants that are so trendy here because of their sentimental meaning).
You can never mention an upgrade of the ring you were proposed: it is considered "sacred", so you have to keep it, it doesn't matter if you don't wear it and it's stored in a drawer, even if the ring is beated up from use.
 
There also some differences between big cities and towns.
I live in a small town in the north, a quite safe area, so I basically wear what I like: since I like wearing multiple gold bracelets I tend to wear long sleeves also in the summer, trying not to show off.
In big cities people wear cheap fake jewels on regular basis and even don't buy expensive jewellery because they don't want to be robbery targets.
In Milan, Como or other big cities in the north,the thiefs use the hug tecnique : they ask information and then hug you to thank you; or they ask you to help them to find a lost earring and then again they hug you because you help them.

Rome, Naples , Palermo and other central and southern Italian cities: expecially if you're a tourist, please put off any kind of jewellery because you're surely going to be robbed (numerous groups start to move around you fast and they manage to steal everything, from the superthin plain necklaces to the plain wedding rings, even pearl studs).

Both northern and southern watch thieves use the hit-and-run tecnique: when you stop with your car due to red traffic light or queu, a Vespa or another motocycle hits the lateral mirror of your car, so you get you lateral glass down to adjust the it: voila', your expensive watch magically disapperas from you writs and also the Vespa disapperars in the traffic.
 
In all reality, most "old money" is non-existent. 90% of generational wealth is consumed by the third generation in a line. It's probably more subtle because they are in reality, not that rich anymore and trying to keep up appearances...
 
purplesilk said:
There also some differences between big cities and towns.
I live in a small town in the north, a quite safe area, so I basically wear what I like: since I like wearing multiple gold bracelets I tend to wear long sleeves also in the summer, trying not to show off.
In big cities people wear cheap fake jewels on regular basis and even don't buy expensive jewellery because they don't want to be robbery targets.
In Milan, Como or other big cities in the north,the thiefs use the hug tecnique : they ask information and then hug you to thank you; or they ask you to help them to find a lost earring and then again they hug you because you help them.

Rome, Naples , Palermo and other central and southern Italian cities: expecially if you're a tourist, please put off any kind of jewellery because you're surely going to be robbed (numerous groups start to move around you fast and they manage to steal everything, from the superthin plain necklaces to the plain wedding rings, even pearl studs).

Both northern and southern watch thieves use the hit-and-run tecnique: when you stop with your car due to red traffic light or queu, a Vespa or another motocycle hits the lateral mirror of your car, so you get you lateral glass down to adjust the it: voila', your expensive watch magically disapperas from you writs and also the Vespa disapperars in the traffic.
Click to expand...

I was robbed a block from the Rome Termini train station. And the man who robbed me looked like the very definition of "Old Money". I never suspected him. :lol:
 
@purplesilk The rest of my trip was wonderful though. I even went back a year later, that's how much I loved Italy. :)
 
I would like to think that this trend is the result of some wise old women sitting around a kitchen table, learning to create Instagram posts and TikTok videos with artificial intelligence, for the purpose of teaching the younger generations not to spend money on logos.
 
purplesilk said:
I ' m glad you loved my country.
XOXO
Click to expand...

Italy is amazing. My husband and I went the year before we expanded our family. Such happy memories of Amalfi, Capri, Rome. Sometimes when things are really stressful we just pause and say "remember Italy?" We were definitely scoped by a woman in the train station in Naples. I was on to her so kept moving around. No valuables, nothing obvious, keeping my luggage in my view but I kept worrying that she was distracting us so someone ELSE could sneak up on us. In the end, nothing happened.
 
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